Is it even love if it hurts this bad?
I mean, does love always have to involve getting hurt? Is it a requirement?
The rain kept pouring, and we were frozen, staring into each other's eyes. Longing. It was like time stopped, and all that mattered was the way our eyes met, filled with a million unspoken words. I felt numb, like my feet were stuck to the ground. The raindrops blended with my tears, as if they understood the pain I felt.
Mahina akong napamura, tangina, minsan na lang magmahal, bakit kailangang maging ganito pa kasakit? Fuck it! This isn't the kind of love I wanted.
I used to break my readers' hearts with the complex romances in my stories. It's ironic, isn't it? Here I am, living through the pain I wrote about. Did my characters feel this way, too?
I turned and started walking, ignoring his voice calling my name. Not because I'm scared of getting hurt again. It's because I'm terrified of running back to him, of taking back those hurtful words, of breaking down the walls I built around my heart.
This is better. He's getting married, and I don't want to ruin that.
Even if we tried again, it wouldn't be the same. We're like shattered glass, you know? You can put the pieces back together, but there will always be cracks. And if we tried to mend our broken hearts, we'd only end up hurting each other more.
But then I felt it, his arms around me, a warm embrace from behind.
Oh, how I miss him. His comforting hugs, the way he smells, just being around him. I really miss him.
I wanted to turn around, to hug him back. I knew I needed to push him away, to run, but there was a part of me that wanted to stay. Just freeze everything, stop time, and hold onto this moment, with him.
My knees went weak when I heard his voice. "I-I miss you. I still love you. I love you so damn much..." His breath on my ear, the way his heart pounded against my back. It was like a physical ache, a reminder of the love that never died.
"Come back to me, please..." he whispered, his voice pleading.
I tried to pull away, because this was wrong. So, so wrong. But he held on tighter, like he was afraid of losing me again.
"Hindi mo na ba ako mahal..." he said, his voice cracking, like he was breaking in two. It wasn't a question. Tears streamed down my face, and I wanted to scream, to tell him I still loved him, that I loved him so much.
He buried his face in my neck, and I felt his tears against my skin. I started to turn, to face him, but I stopped.
I saw Jicell, frozen, staring at us, her face full of shock. This was it, my worst nightmare, playing out in front of me.
I pushed away from him, running toward Jicell, but he grabbed my wrist, pulling me back.
As the rain poured down, The next thing I know was his warm lips touching mine, a searing heat, a moment of pure chaos.
Itutuloy...
#Chasing The Cloud