I feel my heart race when I exit the plane. How would I react, seeing him again? How would he react, and what would he say? I usually loved coming to Monaco, but somehow, this time I hated it. He had made me hate it. I take a deep breath and make it out of the airport and to his car, which was parked somewhere quiet so that we wouldn't get caught - like always. I enter the car without a word. I can't even look at him at this point, let alone greet him. I feel his eyes on me, but he doesn't say a word either before he starts the car and we drive to his apartment.
"Would you like something to eat? Or drink?" He asks carefully once we're sat down on opposite sides of his couch. "No, thanks... I'd like to just get this over with," I reply, my voice weak and eyes on the ground. "I don't wanna break up, Yn, please..." He scoots closer to me and grabs my hands. I turn my body towards him, and I look up at him for the first time since I had arrived. "I can't stay with you after that, Max. I can't and I won't. I deserve better," I explain, but I feel a sense of regret, even though I had made up my mind the second I had heard of what he had done.
"It was just one kiss. It didn't mean anything to me! I was so drunk, I barely even remember it..." He says, trying to justify what he had done as if it would make me feel better. But it didn't. Not in the slightest. "So, while I was home, mourning my dead parents and missing my boyfriend, who was supposed to be with me... You were out, getting drunk, and throwing our whole relationship away, and for what? For a snog with your ex-girlfriend..." I spat, and he now he was the one not looking at me. I could see the tears fall down his face, as they were threatening to fall down mine as well, but I kept my composure.
"I'm so so sorry, Schat. I'll regret that for the rest of my days, but please... Please understand, that I never wanted to hurt you. Part of me thought we were already over! That you and Oscar-" I scoffed and got up, my anger boiling inside me. "Here we go again, Max! Can you stop making our problems about him?!" Max got up and gave me a look of defeat. He didn't even get upset or riled up like he usually would. It was like he was at peace, and he had come to some sort of acceptance.
"I know it isn't solely about him... But, Yn... We both know, that he doesn't see you as just a friend. And I think, that somewhere, deep inside of you, you feel the same way about him too..." He reached out and took my hands again. His soft voice had calmed me down a little, and when he sat back down, I did so too. I listened to what he had to say, but something inside me couldn't quite accept that he was right. But he was. He was right.
"Just because you have feelings for him, doesn't mean you don't have for me too. Because I know you do. You love me, I can feel it." He reached over to place his hand on my cheek, and feeling his touch made me feel a warm sensation inside. "Can we please move past this, I swear, I will never let my jealousy get in the way again..." He moved closer to me as he spoke, and part of me wanted to do as he said. My eyes were stuck on his until they moved from my eyes to my lips and he closed the gap between us, placing his lips on mine. The kiss was warm and desperate. It made me feel so many emotions at once, to the point where I couldn't even think. I kissed him back, but I didn't know if it was because I wanted to, or if it was my pure instinct to do so.
My hands ended up in his hair, whilst his were roaming my body and pulling me in. He pulled me onto his lap without breaking the kiss, and the moment I felt his hand at the hem of my shirt, running his fingers against the bare skin on my waist, I knew I had to stop now or I wouldn't be able to later. So, I pulled away from the kiss, catching my breath before I opened my eyes again. Max was already staring back at me, and I could tell he was hopeful. Hopeful that this wouldn't be the end of us. "I can't do this Max..." I whispered, a tear finally escaping my eye when I saw his expression fall completely. "When I look at you now, all I can think about is her... And how you chose to be here with her, instead of with me, when you had promised me you would..." I stutter over my words and struggle to get them out, as I tear up even more and the tears run down nonstop. Max nods his head and looks down. When I get off him, he takes a deep breath.
"I understand... I hope that maybe one day, you can look at me the same way you used to, and we can try again..." He offers me a sad smile, which I return before leaning over to place one last kiss on his lips. "I hope you know that I really loved you, Maxie..." He nods, sobbing a little when he lets me go, and I get up, off the couch, and leave his apartment. In some way, this had been the perfect way to part ways and end our relationship. It wasn't ideal, but considering the circumstances, I wouldn't have wanted it to go any other way.
On my way back to my hotel for the night, I decided to call up Oscar, to let him know how it all went. He was supportive as always and managed to even put a smile on my face. "So, when is your chat with Horner?" He asked while I was entering my hotel room. I put down my bag and opened a window before sitting down on my bed and turning on the Facetime mode. "I'm having lunch with him tomorrow actually, he's also in Monaco, so we decided it was easier this way," I say, smiling as Oscar's face pops up on my screen. "Okay, let me know how it goes then," He says. He was lying in bed, as it was already pretty late down there, so I felt a bit bad, keeping him up. "How about after tomorrow? Going back home, ooooor?" He asked, smiling widely, to which I couldn't help but giggle. "Well, if you haven't gotten tired of me yet, I thought I might take the next flight to Australia!" I said, to which he let out a sound of excitement. "That would be awesome! I hope you don't mind that I invited Logan as well. He's arriving tomorrow!"
"Of course not! It's going to be so much fun!" I said excitedly, "Yeah, that's what I thought! Just like the old times," He spoke softly and I fell at peace, looking at him on my screen. Suddenly, I felt myself missing him and wished that I could be with him already. I couldn't wait to go down there and see him again, even if it had only been a bit over 24 hours since we last saw each other. "What are you thinking about?" He asked after a short silence. "Nothing, Osc. I just miss you," I admitted, feeling no shame in the things that I was feeling whenever I was with him. I could share anything and everything with him.
"Well, I miss you too, Con. I wish you could be here right now. Or me there..." His eyes were shining, almost lighting up his dark room, which was only lit by his phone screen. "You should probably get some sleep, it's late there, no?" I changed the subject, as I felt myself getting shy at his stares at the screen. "Yeah, it is, but I'd rather stay up and talk to you, you know?" He gave me a soft smile, and I felt my heart skip a beat. "I know, me too, but if Logan is joining you tomorrow, you better be well-rested. And call me when he lands, I want to talk to both of you!" I said and watched as he made a pouty face. "I can be tired with him, he won't mind," He mumbled just loud enough for me to hear. "Oscarrrr" I nagged, and he groaned playfully, giving in finally. "Alright, Con, have a great rest of the day! I'll talk to you soon. Text or call if you need me!" He spoke, and I nodded, smiling at the screen, "Will do Osc. Sleep tight, okay?" And with that, he nodded and ended the call to go to sleep.
I barely got to put down my phone, before a text popped up. I expected it to maybe be Oscar again, but to my surprise, it was Lando. It read, 'Heard you're in Monaco, wanna go on the yacht with Charles, Pierre, and I?' I looked outside and the weather was really nice today, so I decided to go, texting back Lando, 'I'd love that! When and where? I'll be there,' And then immediately started looking for my bikini in my bag. I found it as well as a towel, just before I heard my phone get a notification. Lando had sent the location, telling me that they're already there, so to come whenever. With that, I changed into my bikini, wearing a dress over it and packed the towel along with some sunscreen, headphones and a book I was reading, just in case.
I walked down to the harbour, since it wasn't that far, but instantly got hit with all the memories I had, walking around these streets with Max. We had had a lot of amazing times here in Monaco, and to think that I wouldn't have an excuse to spend time here anymore made me sad. But not as sad as the thought of not talking to Max anymore. Breakups were hard, that's what I had heard, but this felt almost like it wasn't real. Like it was a bad dream, and I couldn't wake up. I felt a physical pain in my chest, and my eyes stung at the tears threatening to fall. Just as they were about to fall, someone brought me out of my thoughts and back into reality.
"Yn! Over here!" It was Lando, calling me over, as I was walking in his direction, but with my head down. I quickly wiped the corners of my eyes and put on a smile when I approached him and hugged him. "Hey, how are you?" I asked, and something in his eyes told me that he knew. "I'm alright, but how are you?" His eyes were full of sympathy, and it didn't take me long to put two and two together. "Oscar told you?" I asked, and he just nodded, putting a hand on my shoulder. "He thought you might need a little fun day out, and you know we love having you here," He smiled widely and began to lead the way onto the boat.
"Hey there, gorgeous!" Pierre spoke up, walking from the other end of the boat. He offered me a hand, as there was no railing from the harbour to the boat. I gladly took it and then was brought into a hug. "Hi Pierre," I smiled at him politely, but could see Lando rolling his eyes from the corner of my eye. "Where's Charles?" I asked, noticing no sight of him on board. "He and Alexandra went to buy some drinks and snacks for us," Lando said, sitting down in the lounge area. I nodded and sat down too, while Pierre went somewhere else momentarily. "You can tell me if Pierre becomes too much, okay?" Lando whispered to me, a serious look on his face. "I can tell him off myself, don't worry," I chuckled, which made Lando loosen up a bit as well.
"You should've seen the look on his face when I told him that you're coming, and why we didn't invite Max as well. It was like Christmas lights in his eyes, I'm telling you," He said, slightly annoyed, his eyes fixated on where Pierre went. "How much did Oscar tell you, Lando?" I asked, curious if he knew everything or just that we had broken up. "Don't be mad at him, okay? He called me really angry a few days ago, and yeah... told me everything. And then texted me today, telling me it was over, and you might need an outing," Lando spoke calmly, putting a hand on my knee in a way of showing support. "He was quite upset, yeah..." I speak, looking out onto the harbour. "I would be too if the girl I loved were treated like that," Lando says, and I look back at him a little shocked.
He looked back at me too, confused at my reaction, "He did tell you, did he not?" I could see the panic in his eyes, so I quickly responded to reassure him, "No, he did! I just didn't think he would tell you that part..." I admit, feeling a little embarrassed. "Please, I figured it out way before he told me, Yn. You should see the way he looks at you," He nudges my side in a teasing manner, and I feel myself blush at his words. Before I got the chance to respond, Charles and Alex were arriving at the boat, and Lando and I both got up to help them with the groceries. Lando took the bags while I greeted the couple with a happy smile and hugs. "It's so good to see you again, Yn!" Alexandra spoke when we sat down and let the boys do the work of getting us out of the harbour. We continued to catch up and make small talk until the boys were done and ready to join us for a nice day of relaxation and fun.