I was never a people person, not wanting to rely on someone.
Especially family, I didn't need help.
I am not vulnerable, I couldn't be. I saw how it affected people on a daily. High schoolers in relationships getting dumped, cheated on, having to many dramas in between them.
It was unnecessary.
I had my small circle and most of them were blood related to me.
My mom, my sister, Bella, and my father who lived across the country.
Oh, and my best friend. But practically family.
I'm content in my lifestyle too. I didn't need pity from anyone. Either way that's what I get from everyone. Even my older sister who tried to act like she understands.
My life was consistent. Making sure my mom was happy, helping my sister from losing her mind because of mom needing so much adventure. Other than doing that I played sports, practicing everyday.
Trying my best, not to be the best but to keep up my adrenaline. Running helps the most.
Adrenaline kept me alive, if I could jump off an airplane I would. I would do every crazy thing imaginable just because of the adrenaline that came with it.
Even little things can entice me. My piercings, having to make them a secret from coaches to play sports. Riding my motorcycle anytime was the best feeling after getting it.
I snuck out a few times, not even to do crazy things but to just say I did it.
You would think living in Arizona helped me with keeping my adrenaline up but you'd be wrong. It's the same thing everyday now. I know what's around.
And the heat, don't get me started.
As much as I love my mom, I wanted to be in a forest hiking, see a fucking wild animal that could attack me. Jump off cliffs for the hell of it. Ride my motorcycle on different roads.
Seeing my dad, maybe join him in action. Hunt with him even.
Speaking of which, I stood beside Bella, my older sister by 10 months. She had just said goodbye to some "friends" who seemed like they could care less that she was leaving.
I turn to see our mom walking out of the house, so much energy balled into one person. She had hints of sadness and anxiety pulled on her face, trying to hide it with being happy for us.
She thrusts a phone into the hands of my sister, "It won't work again, baby." She frowned, her face always looked like it moved with every feeling she had.
Never being able to hide how she felt. "You put it on hold." Bella points out, the tiniest bit amused.
"I did?"
I smirk, trying to stop myself from laughing.
As much as it is funny it is worrisome, how will we reach her if she doesn't even know how to work a phone.
"Look, you also called Mexico." Renée pushes Bella, nudging me as well as the three of us laugh.
"I'll figure it out. You gotta be able to reach me and Phil on the road." She exclaims right before she gets excited. "I love saying that," she grins, "On the road."
"Very romantic,"
"Very."
Bella and I both say, silently glancing at each other.
Phil comes up behind our mom, "If you call crappy motels, back water towns and ballpark hot dogs romantic. He jokes, well partially since he was serious.
He places a Phoenix Desert Dogs baseball hat on Renées head, along with kisses her.
Looking at them partly soothes my nerves about leaving mom. I'm sure Bella feels the same since we practically took care of her for so long. Even though it should've been the other way around.
Phil walks away, to finish packing the car with our things. Renée grabs a hold of both of our arms, clinging to us as we walk to the vehicles.
I'm driving my motorcycle, mom wanted to get a trailer for it since it's a really long drive but I convinced her not to. I couldn't sit in a car with them for that long.
Plus I have a feeling Charlie is going to force me to anyway.
"Now you know if you two change your minds, l'll race back here from wherever the game is." Her face strained trying to hide how even though it would be a sacrifice she would still do it for us.
"You don't have to worry." I force a smile, Bella doing the same.
"We won't change our minds mom."
"You might, Bella. You've always hated Forks." That's true, I usually visited more than her. I had a closer relationship to dad, due to my interest of hunting like him.
"It's not about Forks, it's about dad. I mean unlike [Name], I went two weeks a year. We barely know each other." She explains but I think it just worsened our moms worried expression.
"Mom, I'm fine. I want to go. I got [Name] there with me." She looked between us, hugging her eldest, whose face drops once she knew her mom couldn't see it. It was full of dread and doubt. I also noticed the regret but kept quiet when she wants to bring it up she will.
They let go and Bella climbs into the car, moms attention going to me.
"I want you behind us at all times, you do not pass this vehicle. And no swerving." She furrows her eyebrows, staring at me. "And don't be stupid." I add with a smirk, she rolls her eyes in a humorous way.
"I just want my baby girl safe." She pouts, pulling me into a tight hug. "You don't have to worry with me." I miss her cheek, pushing out of the hug as I knew it would've been longer if I didn't.
"Alright helmet and jacket and let's go!" She pats my butt, reaching over and getting my helmet to give it to me. She gets into the van and I adjust my wired earbuds so one goes into my ear, stuffing the rest into my jacket and zipping it up.
I pull my helmet on and I press play on my iPod.
Getting to Washington State was a breath of fresh air, not only for my tired hand but the change of view and weather. My sister called it gloomy, never paying attention to the beauty of it all.
Dad surprisingly let me continue driving my bike, it was bittersweet for me.
Really it was because he forgot the trailer. I kind of wish he did bring it because slouching like this for hours is not exactly fun. My back will be aching for weeks.
I'm just glad I didn't have to sit in the awkward atmosphere of them two in that cruiser.
We passed a sign that said "The City Of Forms Welcomes You. Population 3246."
I smile to myself.
Passing all of the familiar buildings I was missing felt amazing.
We pulled into Charlie's driveway, I take my helmet off, sitting up straight for the first time in a few hours. Charlie comes over and messes with my hair as I climbed to his torso like a little kid. We laugh and he hugs me back.
I was the first to get into the house, putting my things right in my room. Really throwing them on the ground and rushing back out to see if Bella needs any help. My room was the only one downstairs. Dad had to make add it onto the house when they found out they were having me surprisingly.
I was truly the accident out of the two. Only three months after Bella was born was when I came around.
"I put Grandpas desk in your room. And I cleaned some shelves in the bathroom for you two." He was mainly speaking to Bella. I watched her grimace. "That's right, one bathroom."
I followed her eyes around the house, going straight to a picture of our parents when they were younger and in love. "I'II put these up in your room." Charlie motions to her bags.
"I can do it."
I silently stand there as they both reach for the bags, awkwardly bumping into each other causing me to cringe at the scene.
She backs off, letting him do it anyway. Which she should've done in the beginning. And I wouldn't have seen that go down.
After that... experience, I followed my dad to the living room. "That was, nice." He pauses for a minute before sighing. I place a hand on his shoulder. "It'll get better. This is just new for both of you." I smile sweetly and he nods, swinging an arm around my shoulders. But internally I'm just hoping l'm right. It's going to be a long two years if I'm wrong. "What would I do without you?" He nudges me.
He lets go of me, telling me about how Billy and Jacob should be here soon to drop off surprises they've been working on. The one for Bella I knew about.
And right after it was spoken into the air we heard a honk outside.
I stand up straighter and run outside. A boy my age hops out of the red truck, rushing to give me a hug. "Jacob!" I laugh, this was the best friend I was talking about. My absolute best friend.
"Bella, you remember Billy Black." Charlie speaks up, obviously Bella came outside after hearing the honk as well.
I let go of Jacob, "Glad you two are finally here. Charlie hasn't shut up about it since you two told him y'all were coming." He teases our dad, both Jacob and I snicker at the two who have always acted like this.
"Keep exaggerating, l'lI wheel you down the hill." He tells the man who's in a wheelchair.
"Right after I ram you in the ankles." Billy goes after Charlie who dodges. Jacob shakes his head, I take him up to Bella. Poking him to say something.
I'm Jacob, we made mud pies together when we were little kids." He exclaims, she squints almost unnoticeably. "Yeah I think I remember."
"Are they always like this?" She points to the two dads. "It's getting worse with age."
He jokes.
Jacob always had a crush on Bella, so it was cute watching him finally be able to interact with her and not be a nervous little kid.
Cutting us out of our small silence Charlie pats the hood of the truck. We didn't even notice they stopped messing around. "So what do you think of your homecoming gift?" He grins proudly. I watched my sisters face contort to confusion to happiness. "No way. The truck is for me?" Turning my focus to my dad who was soaking in her excitement. "Just bought it off Billy here."
"I rebuilt the engine." Jacob adds in.
"It's perfect." Her smile grew bigger, and more genuine. It was great to see her eager and happy about something. Her and Jacob rush to the truck so he could explain everything to her.
My dad snuck up to me, handing a small box. I look up at him confused. "Open it. He motions. I stare at it for a minute, glancing over to Billy who puts his hands up as to say he knew as much as I did.
I bit my lip, opening the box carefully.
It had a locket inside, the same locket I would stare at in the window of an abandoned antique store that no one would clean out. The place I begged my dad to go into just to get me that necklace.
"The place finally got cleaned out and I just happened to be on patrol before they got rid of it." He tells me.
"It doesn't have a picture in it yet but I thought you could pick one you'd like." I threw my arms around him, "it's beautiful." I pulled away to look at it in my hands again as it was a delicate flower.