Bea's POV
4 years ago, there was this girl who approached me. I was having a short vacay with some of my friends sa Bora.
"Excuse me. Hi, was it you who took a picture of me kanina?" She asked. I nodded. I was sitting comfortably sa buhanginan when she approached me so I stood up para makausap siya and not to be disrespectful na rin. "Ang galing mong kumuha. Pwede ulit magpa-picture?"
Na-alala ko pala kanina nagpa-picture siya while I am having a walk sa beach side. That's our first encounter. Actually, tatlo sila kanina na nagpa-picture sa 'kin. As far as I can remember, her name is Caitlin.
"Sorry, may bayad na sa pangalawa eh" I said in jest.
She pouted "Gano'n? " She said. Cutie.
Tumawa na 'ko. "No. Biro lang." I said and I saw her eyes sparkled as she smiles. "Saan? Ngayon na ba?" I ask.
"Yes, okay lang ba?" I can see her excitement. I nod and 'yun we immediately went to the spot kung saan sila magpapa-picture.
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"Here. Ito na lang gamitin mo." Says her boyfriend while handing me his phone.
"Mmm... I actually have my camera here with me that I use as a photographer." I said then showed them my cam out from my bag.
"Really? Kaya pala ang ganda ng mga shot mo kanina. That's cool." Manghang sabi ni Cait.
"I'll just send it to you na lang through instagram or facebook messenger if you want." I offered.
"That's a good idea. Thank you" Her boyfriend agreed.
So there, I started taking pictures of them. Mga ilang takes din kami. Sinulit eh. And that's it. That's how we became so close and the rest is history.
At a current time...
I just finished editing some of the shots from yesterday's pictorial of my newly wed clients. Kaka-akyat ko lang din dito sa unit ko galing sa studio down there when I heard someone rang my doorbell. I am not actually expecting anyone so I wonder who could it be.
"Darling!" She greeted as I opened the door. It's Caitlin with a paper bag with her. We made beso after we hugged quickly.
"Come in" I opened the door widely then shut it after niyang makapasok.
It was a week after ng encounter namin sa Bora when we learned that my studio and unit are just in the same building as her condo unit. So, almost everyday na din kami nagkikita and she would just come over here without me being told. Surprise daw eh.
"Saw your ig story awhile ago. You need help? Kamusta ka?" She asked with a serious and concerned tone.
"I'm good. Ikaw ha, naka-monitor ka sa posts at stories ko 'no?" I joked. Pero she's always been like that.
Napaka-caring and sweet na tao. So lucky to have her in my life. Even just as a friend.
"Luh! OA mo darling. Hahahaha but of course, malay ko ba mamaya nakahandusay ka na pala diyan 'di ko pa alam." She said and sprawled out on my couch.
Binuklat ko naman 'yong dala-dala niyang paper bag kanina na nilapag niya sa table. It's my favorite Adobo and ginataang alimasag.
"Wow! Did you cook for me?" I said enthusiastically.
I took 2 plates and nagsandok na din ng rice for the two of us.
"No. Si Gerald nagluto niyan." She answered,
"Ah. Kaya pala masarap eh. Hindi mo nga luto" Well, that's true. Hindi talaga mahilig at magaling magluto si Cait.
"Hahahaha grabe siya oh!" She laughed. Totoo naman kase.
I paused at a sudden realization.
"Ah. Kelan ba?" I asked. Whenever kasi they need a photographer, they would give me something like this. "Alam ko na mga ganito mo eh"
"Next week, Monday. Simple shots lang okay na." She replied. And I was right. See?
"Hala! I have a scheduled photoshoot that day. Sorry" Sabi ko though wala naman talaga akong schedule that day.
She pouts. Akala naman niya madadaan niya ko sa mga gan'yan niya. HAHA
"Ihhhh It's our 5th anniversary. Please, darliiinnngg" She said with her puppy eyes and hands firmly folded together.
"Magagalit client ko. Nakaschedule na 'yon eh" I said. I heard her sighed.
"Sige na darling, please" Tumayo na sa couch at heto, her head rested on my shoulder and nakakapit sa braso ko. Naglalambing na.
"Okay, fine." I gave in. Rupok mo talaga Bea. "Basta treat niyo lunch at dinner ko that day ha?"
And there, I saw her smile widely and she kissed my cheek "Thanks so much, darling!"
"Sus! Kunwari pa siya. Nadamay pa 'yung ig story ko eh..."
"No. I am really concerned about you."
Strangely, I always feel how important and loved I am when I'm with her. Even the smallest details about me ina-alam niya. She listens. I also feel her genuine care for me. No judgment. She unknowingly makes my heart skip a beat all the time.
But I know my boundaries. Painful as it is, but her heart already belongs to someone else.
That day of photoshoot...
"Closer!" I shouted. "Okay, perfect!"
With my team organizing the set-up, Cait and Gerald are now getting ready for the next look. I went to Cait to check on her. Nando'n naman 'yung mga staff ko to take charge and manage everything. She might needs someone to assist her.
"Ganda ko 'di ba? I'm like one of those Disney Princesses" I heard her say. Well, totoo naman, she's so drop-dead gorgeous with how she look.
"Oo. Si Moana. Magkasingkulay eh!" I teased.
"Panira ka lang eh!" She said and rolled her eyes at me.
"Ay sige uwi na lang kami. Team, pack up na tayo!" I said and acted like magpa-pack up na nga.
"Ito naman, joke lang darling." She hugged and kissed me on my cheeks. "Love you!" She said and smiled.
Then we started shooting again.
"Great! Sige pa, mas sweet pa" I said. Na pinagsisihan ko din naman.
They start to be closer na kulang na lang mag-kiss sila. Every touch and every move was passionate. Yung mga tinginan nila, you can really see their burning love for each other. I am supposed to be happy for them.
But how?
"Bei?" Tawag ni Cait. Hindi ko namalayan na I was just staring at them and not speaking for a moment. I shook my head, getting back to my senses.
"Yeah, uhmm nice. More romantic pa guys!" I instruct loudly. She smiled.
Okay na sana not until Gerald was about to kiss Cait.
"Nooo! Wait!" I shouted. I went to them from the camera and inilagay lang ang kamay ni Gerald sa bewang ni Cait and I placed Cait's hands on his shoulders.
"There. Mas magdikit lang kayo"
I went back to my camera. I took a deep breath to compose myself.
I don't even know why I stopped Gerald from doing that. Probably sa selos? Ngayon pa lang selos na selos na ako, pa'no pa kaya if I saw them kissing as in lips-to-lips in front of me? Baka ikamatay ko na.
Well, they almost kissed actually.
Then we continued with the shoot...
The room suddenly filled for a moment with silence until Gerald starts to slowly kneel down. Everyone starts to film with their phones' cameras with a wide smile. Cait's freaking out in happiness, I guess. Her hands are covering her mouth in surprise.
At that moment, All I could do was to document every moment. Because I know for a fact that this day will be one of the most special and most important things that ever happened in her life. This will forever lives in our memory, especially, in Cait's memory. I can't miss this out. Not this one. I may not be the person who's in front of her with a small box of ring, this is more than enough for me. That I'm the one who's behind the camera.
"Caitlin Viray, will you marry me?" Gerald proposed.
She nodded slowly as an answer and is now teary-eyed. Gerald is happily putting the ring on Cait's finger then stood up and hugged her.
I forced myself to smile, trying not to show the hurt I am feeling.
I didn't realize na naiyak na din ako. I am still taking pictures.
I congratulated Cait when I got the chance to have a moment with her.
"Hala siya! Na-iyak din eh!" She said and everyone laughed. Daig ko pa daw nanay ng magiging bride-to-be. I rolled my eyes and slapped her shoulder.
I turned to Gerald.
"Please, take good care of her. Tsaka kahit 'di masarap mga luto niyan pagt'yagaan mo pa rin kainin" I tell him while still wiping my tears.
"Noted, Kap!" Gerald with a salute.
"Ehehehehe. I'm getting married" Cait said chirpily.
I just nod and everyone clapped. Including me. I know she's happy. Okay na 'ko dun.
We celebrated their engagement that night with their immediate family members, friends and my staffs.
Tonight, kinaya kong i-set aside ang kung ano mang nararamdaman ko. Para bang wala akong paki-alam sa sakit na nararamdaman ko. All I care about is Cait. And her happiness. And I don't want to ruin it.
Even if it means, masaktan ako.
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The night before Cait's wedding
It's her Bridal Shower. After almost a year of preparation.
Of course, even the prenup photoshoot we made sure that it's perfect.
"Darling!" Salubong sa 'kin ni Cait as soon as I have arrived. I was the last one to arrived. We hugged.
I pulled away from her embrace and touch her face with my hands
"Ilang oras na lang. You'll finally tying the knot." I said. I saw her eyes glinted in excitement.
"Yeeess. Thank you for coming into my life and for always being there." She said with her almost cracking voice. We then hugged again. "Please, let your team do the job muna. Ikaw ang maid of honor ko eh." She keeps on telling me about this since the engagement. Actually, ilang beses namin to pinagtalunan na dalawa.
"I can't. Hindi ba sabi ko sa 'yo hindi ko p'wedeng palagpasin 'to? Sa dami-daming weddings that my team and I have covered, 'yong sa iyo pa ba mami-miss ko?" I tell her. "Tsaka, hindi rin ako mapapakali na wala ako sa likod ng camera at naka-upo lang do'n. Gusto ko hands-on ako sa pagkuha ng videos and pictures on your special day" I added. Ayan. Mukhang na-convinced ko naman siya.
"Thank you. I love you, darling!" She hugged me, hoping and praying that this will not be the last.
"I love you so much, Cait" And hugged her back. Tighter.
I am so happy that you are about to enter a new chapter of your life. As someone else's wife. Still, there will always be a part of me in your story and that's for sure. I will stay by your side, even if it's hard. Even if it pains me so much. I'll get over it. I should loosen up my grip to this hope for us and watch you walk towards him, waiting for you at the altar while capturing those moment behind the camera.
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"Grabe! Everything feels surreal. Dati pangarap ko lang magsuot ng magandang wedding gown, walking down the aisle while everyone's looking at me like I'm the most beautiful girl--- I mean, bride in the world." Cait said while looking at herself in the mirror.
They're just finalizing her look, doing some fixing on her hair and make up. We still have half an hour to go before the bridal car will pick us up.
"Ako din, that's my dream." I said while holding my camera, checking my shots earlier.
"Ang maging bride?" She asked.
"Yes. And there's another one" I replied.
"Tell me, Bei. Ano pa 'yong isa?" She asked again.
I had to took a long deep breath before I looked at her. Maybe this will be the last and the only chance for me to tell her. Maaaring huli na, pero I need to say it. At least masabi ko man lang sa kanya.
"For you to be my bride, Cait" I tell her.
I laughed at myself. I know this crazy, right?
"It's my dream to see you wearing a white gown while walking towards me. I know huli na for me to say these things pero... from the very start, huli na naman na talaga." I paused for a while, reminiscing our first encounter. "That moment when I first saw you with him sa Bora, I told myself na nakapas'werte niya. Kaya nga when you looked for me again and approached me, sobrang happy ko kasi I thought, hanggang do'n na lang 'yon. Ang hirap but I tried to keep this feelings I have for you from everyone, especially from you. I love you. And my camera will be my forever witness to that. Now, I have to let go of this feelings. Please be happy with him. I'll be fine. Kaya ko 'to." I smiled and kissed her forehead before leaving.
I decided to tumble the words that my heart has been holding back out for so long.
And it felt so good.
Today, on your very special day. To see you walking towards the altar, wearing a glamorous white gown (tailored-fitted just for her) and about to wear the ring that I was the one who chose while capturing every beautiful angles of you as you walk down the aisle, my darling will fulfill that dream of mine. Though, I am not the one waiting for you and the one you are about to marry.
This was inspired by a RhiMich story I have read which was also inspired by another story. I felt that I should write a CaitBea version. So, here it is.