WHILE THE BOTH OF THEM is busy getting ready for their breakfast out, Hope just realizes that she needs another clothes other than the one she currently wore because she's not going to keep repeating the same outfit for days if she insisted to stay with Rafe. At least until he finally finds a place to stay.
Plus, these aren't even hers.
She pursed her lips and her eyes darting on the JJ's shirt that she hung on a hook inside the bathroom. She wonders what he is currently doing, maybe she should send him a text later asking for him. She just can't help but to miss him a bit.
Maybe they're going to be just fine, maybe he's no longer mad at her. And then, she's going to explain everything to him. She's sure that he's going to listen to her, he's gonna understand it.
Hope close her eyes while letting the warm water to pouring all over her body. Trying to put herself at ease state, clearing her mind out just for a while just for her to enjoy the shower. It's not much but it still did the work.
Rafe was just done wearing his pants when he heard a notification went off and he's pretty sure it wasn't come from his phone. His eyes wildly scan the room and he caught Hope's phone on a bed. A curiosity seeping into him, he's debating whether he should go check up on it or just ignores it.
But the voices inside his head telling him to go there and take a look on it. He has the strong urges that it's gonna be about JJ. Maybe he can find out what exactly happening between the two of them, maybe he can do something to push JJ away from her life.
Rafe quickly brushed the thought away, he can't do that to Hope, he needs to respect her privacy and it's really not his concerned with who she wants to text. He looks away, focus back to put on his shirt.
Another chimes coming in caught his attention again, he glances back towards the bed. The urge to go there getting strong and he knows he can't resist it.
Rafe already fully clothes, he glances towards the bathroom and he's still can hear the water running from the inside. Hope is still in a shower and she's just got in there, she must takes more time to get ready before she walks out fully clothes.
He doubts that she's going to walk out only in a towel, she won't do anything crazy like that.
So, following the voice he's got, he dropped his towel on a chair and walking towards the bed. He keep his eyes at the bathroom, making sure that he's still hearing the water running before he grabs the phone.
He taps the screen, multiple notifications popped up on there but none of them looks important enough to him. Just bunches about her social media things and other, he just ignores it.
Until he reads a name that familiar enough, with couple of recent chats from him.
He taps the notification but he can't get the fully texts and he needs to get into the phone. He chews his lips, she's got a password.
Rafe looks away from the phone to the door of the bathroom once again, his mind been gearing up to think about the possible passcodes that Hope might use as her passwords. Something that he can guess out.
Her birthday, he thought.
He glances back to the screen, his thumb tapping it with the numbers in his mind for her birthday.
"One...six...zero...five" he mumbles with his fingers working its work but it was wrong. He let out a cuss, at the fail attempt.
He try it again.
"Zero...five...one...six" he tried, putting them in backwards and it's actually corrected. It bring him to her home screen.
A smirk once again plaster on his lips when he's succeed. Bad choice to put your birthday as your passcode if you don't want people easily access into your phone by one guess.
Rafe quickly scurrying to her message box, taking a minute to scan every names until it stops at one. The recent one at the top of the list.
He taps JJ's name and it brings him right into their conversations. There's bunches of them and it's enough to tell him that all this time she had JJ's number and they've been talking to each other.
He clenched his jaws, especially when he reads the sweet words from both of them. He ignores it and he's back to read the recent texts from him.
Hey
I know this probably not a very good time
But uh, r u free rn, can we talk?
And I'm sorry for what I said, really.
Rafe keep reading the texts over and over again, wondering what he could do to stop JJ from keep talking with Hope. That's when his thumbs start to hovering on the keyboard.
I don't want to talk to you.
Stop texting me.
Rafe types it, reading it multiple time to make sure it looks like Hope who send it. He's waiting for JJ's responds.
His ears are still perks up at the sounds that coming from the bathroom, in case Hope is going to come out anytime sooner but he's still can hear the water running. He can make sure he's still good here.
A ding coming her phone again forcing his attention back to the screen. Another texts from JJ.
Princess, pls. Don't say that
I'm sorry for what I said. You're right, it's your life and I can't say anything abt it
Let's talk, oky? I promised I'm not gonna be mad
Rafe let out a heavy grunt.
No JJ. I dont wanna talk to you
Just leave me alone and stop texting me
Or I'm gonna block you
Rafe send them again, a satisfied smirk plaster on his lips. Proud of his works, knowing that it's going to work. He can eliminate JJ from Hope's life and be able to keep with him.
Don't be like this, Hope
You want to throw away everything bcs of him?
Drop it JJ
Or I'm going to block you. I'm not joking abt it
Hope pls
No, leave me alone. I don't wanna see you anymore
You dont mean it, Hope
I do, JJ. I meant every words
He's going to hurt you
He won't
U don't have to worry
Rafe send it and he waits for another seconds if the boy is going to send another texts but nothing. He smile in a victory, he knows he did it. He knows that he's winning the game for now.
He just hope that Hope isn't going to find out about this and he's confident enough that she won't know a thing. Because Rafe isn't allow her to go back to JJ, he's going to keep her here with him. He's going to make sure of it.
Rafe heard the water stop running and it starts to notice him. He quickly deleted all the texts he was sending to JJ, leaving the conversation to the last time they actually chat.
He exit the message box and close the phone. Putting it back on its previous position on the bed before he's back to pretend that he's still getting ready. Checking himself from a mirror that hang on the wall, just waiting for Hope to walk out from the bathroom.
When Hope is done wearing her clothes, she steps out from the bathroom with a fresh feeling. She drapes her towel on her shoulder and her eyes automatically darted on Rafe who is standing in front of the mirror, fixing his hair.
Rafe quickly turns his head to her direction when he heard the door got pushed open. He met with a soft face of her already looking at him, he can't help to smile along with her.
"Hey" Rafe greets her first, acting casual like he didn't do anything. Avoiding to acting suspicious.
"Hey" Hope greets him back, walking away from the door.
"Nice shower?"
"Yeah, feels better" Hope nods, she indeed feels better. Rafe let out a hummed, just agreeing with her. "Hey, can we go buy some clothes after we're done with breakfast? I really need to change my shirt" she asked, giving him a look.
"Yeah sure" Rafe nods "But uh--how are you going to pay for it?"
"I'm gonna ask my dad to send some money. I've got his card, he can put some in there. Just like he always did" she said.
"Yeah, of course. I'll drive you wherever you want" Rafe beams causing Hope to chuckle.
"Thank you, my saviour" She teased him and continues to walk towards the bed.
Rafe nervously watching her with his eyes, hoping that JJ isn't going to text her another message or that's going to be a disaster to him. But he didn't hear any chimes, he think he's good for now. And Hope not even reaching out for her phone.
He looks away from her, deciding to unwrap the bandage from his wrist that cover up the burned that Barry gave to him yesterday. It still sting, sometimes he feels his skin tightened when he gives his left hand enough pressure.
A hiss come out from his mouth when he's attempting to peel it away from his skin, feeling it sticking around the wound while he's trying to peel it out causing Hope to snap her neck towards him when she heard the sound from him.
She saw him a little struggling with the bandage, and the hisses coming from him making Hope to approach him slowly. She thinks she can help him for that, especially when he just help her with her knee last night.
"Here, let me help you" Hope chiming in, holding out her hands toward him but Rafe pulls his hand away before she can touch it
"No, it's okay. I can do it myself" he insisted.
"Rafe, let me help you" She demands, "You help me last night, it's the least I can do to return the favour"
Rafe pursed his lips "You don't have to, you know? I was taking care of you, it's what I do"
"Well, I want to take care of you too" Hope insisted "Can we taking care of each other?" she asked, raising her brows a little
His lips tugging upwards, that sounds right to him. He likes the sounds of them taking care of each other, that's means Hope wants to stick around him longer and he absolutely has nothing to complain.
"Yeah, we can do that. We can take care of each other" He nods, can't stop the smile from coming out from himself.
Hope chuckles a little and she's back to reach out for his hand and Rafe didn't protest this time. She helps him unwrap the bandage, doing it slowly so she's not hurting him in the process. A soft grunt still comes out from Rafe but he didn't say anything to stop her.
She notices something from him, his hand a little shaky and she's already pick up on that trait from him ever since she learned about his addiction.
It's been long enough since they got any conversations about his drug problems and she honestly trying not to bring it up on their daily conversation because she doesn't want to piss him off or trying to make him feel uncomfortable. But she just can't help to feel concerned for it, for him.
And the last time they encountered for something like this, he didn't really do very well.
"Hey, Rafe" She spoke, earning the look from him.
"Yeah?" he replied.
"You uh--good?" She asked again, earning more confusing look from him.
"What do you mean? Do I look not good?" he asked, he's cocking his brows even more.
"I mean, your hand is a little shaky" Hope pointed out, she looks up to him from his hand "Last time we talked about it, you're not really good. Just to make sure"
Rafe paused a little when she pointed it out. The truth is he's a little shaky because he's still not having his usual morning bump. Last time he did it was yesterday morning, before Barry get to him.
And he's trying not to use it when he's with Hope because she seems to know about it. She's picked up on his traits very well and he's trying not to look pathetic. He's also didn't want to tell her how he's still need for his drugs wherever he's going.
"Yeah, I'm good" He confirmed, nodding his head.
He's not entirely good, his body is still craving for it but he's almost run out of his substances and after everything that happened between him and Barry, he didn't think the man still wants to front any cocaine for him.
"You uh--you've been using lately?" she continues, just trying to make a conversation to distract him.
But she's also eager to know if Rafe meant it when he said he's trying to stop using the last time they talked about it. It just couple days ago, even though she knows he was using it back at the midsummer.
"Uh, not really" he answered, sounds a little hesitates.
"Not really?"
"Yeah" He nods "I mean, not as much as I used to"
"You really meant it when you said you want to go sober?" she asked,
Because if he really is, that's a good news to her. That means that he is really keeping his words to stop his addiction. Though she knows it's not easy for him to do that, she'll be happy to help him.
"Been trying" he lied because he's not even trying, he's not even close to quit using it.
All he knows, he's been snorting all of his substances like there's no tomorrow especially when he's got a little stressed out and he needs to calm himself down. Going sober never really crossing his mind.
After what happened last night between him and JJ along with his argument with Hope, he keeps bumping more and more into his system. He's still surprised how he's still alive and not OD from it. The thought of it actually making his spine shivering.
"That's good, you know? I'm so proud of you" She states, giving him a sweet smile making Rafe to feel bad.
He knows he shouldn't lie to her about it, he should just tell her the truth since she's already knows enough about him. But when she looks so happy like this, he can't bare himself to break the news. He knows he's going to disappoint her and she's gonna get worry about him.
He doesn't want her to get disappointed with him or even get worry about him. He just wants her to be happy with him, that's what matter.
"Yeah, it feels good" he continues, scratching his nose a little. A habit that he did it when he's lying.
"If you need anything, I'm gonna be here for you, okay? Don't be afraid to ask me for anything" she said, wanting he knows about the support he's got from her.
"Yeah, I know" Rafe nods, can't help to feel happy at the reassurance from her.
That's enough to tell him that she's not going anywhere, she wants to stay with him. Hope smiles and she likes seeing him so positive and healthy like this, maybe there's a still a hope for him.
While they're so into their conversations, she already take off the bandage fully from his wrist. Exposing the burned mark to the air, she grimaces a little when she finally got the full view of it.
"It's done" She announced, putting down the bandage on a small table next to her "I think you should let it open instead of wrapped it up. The outside air is good for it, let 'em breath" she advices.
"Thanks" Rafe said, cradling his arm a little to inspect it.
"You might need to see a doctor. I mean, that looks bad"
"It's probably nothing. But I'll go to see one if it starts to get bad" Rafe assured, he thinks he can handle a burned mark on his arm.
She just nods "Did it hurt?" she continues to ask, because it does look hurts.
"Not really" Rafe said and he lied again, it does hurt like a bitch. He almost burst his eyes out when Barry shoved his arm right on the exhaust.
Hope grimaces a little "Did--did Barry really did that to you? He burned your arm?" she continues, because she can't help to feel bother about it. Though he knows that there's nothing shocker about it, she knows how Barry handled people who owed his money.
"Yeah, he did" Rafe nodded, just admit it.
"Because you owed him the money?"
"Yeah"
"And then he took your bike as--collateral?"
"Yes too" He confirmed it, pursing his lips.
"How he did it? The burned, I mean?" she continues her interrogation, because she can't help to feel curious.
Rafe hesitates for a bit, debating whether he should tell her or not. But what's worse could it be? she already knows and heard enough.
"He uh--he pinned my hand against the exhaust, kinda fried me there" He said with a hint of humour, trying to play it cool.
Hope scrunching up her nose, she's totally can feel the pain "That's so--painful" she said, even the imagine of it making her arm pounding.
"It's nothing, it's what I deserved" he brushed it off "Don't be late for your payment next time if you don't want your arm got fried"
"That's not funny" Hope states when she trace the hint of joke from him "You got hurt, that looks fucking hurt"
Rafe fakes his frown "I told you it's fine, I can handle it" he said "If anything, I feel a lot better with you here with me"
Hope sigh "I know" she said "But you good, right? It didn't hurt you or anything?" she asked, still worry of him.
He steps up closer to her, putting a hand on her face to softly caressed it "I'm fine, Mia" he assured, giving her a soft smile "You don't have to worry about me"
She leans into his touch, nodding her head and taking into his assurance. She knows he's fine and that's enough for her
"Okay" she states.
"Good" he mutters, patting her cheeks lightly "Are you done get ready, yet?" he continues, dropping his hand from her face to grab his watch from the table.
"Yeah" She confirmed.
It's not like she has her make up bag here to touch up her face with it just like she usually did before she goes out. She's not even have her sunscreen with her to apply, the heat out there totally going to burn her skin inside and out.
"Okay, let's hit the road" he said with his keys on his hand, beckoned for Hope to follow him towards the door with his hand.
Hope quickly follow him, grabbing on his hand that hold out towards her and the both of them walk out from the room ready for the breakfast.
•••
WHEN THEY ARRIVED at the restaurant, Rafe leads her in with a such gentleman manner that she never got from him and she never thought that he actually capable of being so respectful like this. But she's not going to complain a bit about it, because she can't help to enjoy this side of him. She loves being treated like this.
He starts with open the door for her and let her walked in first into the restaurant just like those scene she always watched on television or even from the books she reads. She can't help to feel like she's in one of those plays, no one ever did this to her.
And when they're about to get to their table, Rafe pulls out a chair for her before she can take a sit on it. She mutters a thanks for him and he help to push the chair slowly for her to have her seat.
Her lips can't stop from keep smiling and the happy feeling keep blossoming in her heart. Her eyes looking around the fancy restaurant that she surprisingly never been before by herself or even with her parents. But she loves the interior design they got in here, it more like a vintage concept that really caught her interest.
They already placed their order and just need to wait for the waiters to send them out.
Rafe still remains quiet, he nervously tapping his fingers on his knee under the table while he's debating whether he should start the conversation or not. He wants to know if he's doing all of this all right, he wants to know if Hope actually enjoy this.
But seeing her right now in front of him, with a smile never falter from her cherry lip, he doubts that she's not enjoying this. Or else, she's not going to look that happy, right? She's not going to have that look on her face.
But that's not enough to convince himself, he needs to hear it from Hope.
"Hey--" Rafe finally open his mouth, deciding to just asked her about it instead of keep monologuing inside his head.
Hope averts her gaze from inspecting the place to Rafe, she raised her brows "Yeah?" she asked.
Rafe shifted on his seat "Are you-okay? I mean, you're okay right with me bringing you here?" he questioned.
He just picked up the best restaurant he ever been before and he can guarantee the quality of food and service from this place so he can give the best for Hope. He wants to make her feels good and he's not going to let anything screw it up.
"Of course I'm okay, why wouldn't I be?" she said with a smile, almost like she can trace the nervousness from Rafe "I like this place, it looks great" she continues.
Rafe let out a breath of relief "It's one of the greatest restaurants I've ever been" he said, his eyes roaming around the place "My dad used to bring me here a lot and I sometimes went here by myself"
"Really? I never been here before. I never know this place ever exist" she states.
She's been living here for 16 years and pretty much Sarah and her always have their breakfast out or even dinner dates together all over the island but she never been here or even heard about it. The blonde also never mentioned about it.
"It's a good place, I assure you. I really like it here" Rafe assured her again making Hope to nod her head "We can make it as our place if you actually love it"
That actually gained her attention "Our place" she asked, raising her brows.
"Yeah, our place" he nods "You know, a place that we can go whenever we want. Just to have a casual hangout or even a breakfast like right now. Just, to do anything. We can be here, anytime, whenever we like"
That idea actually intrigue her, a place for her and Rafe to go and be whenever they want just to do something casual sounds very fun to her. Our place, just like he said. Their place.
"That sounds fun" She said, agreeing with his idea "I love to have this as our place"
"Really?" He beams, surprised that she actually liking his idea.
He thought maybe she's gonna dislike it, maybe he was being silly by saying that. But she actually like it, she said she loves it.
"Yeah, it sounds really fun" Hope confirmed it, keep smiling at him "We can do that. We can just hangout whenever we want here or probably do something fun together" she adds up, feeding the ideas more to him.
And that actually causing Rafe to get more thrilled, because she actually wants to do a lot of things with him. She wants to have fun with him, he can't get more happier about it. He would do anything just so Hope keep wanting to be with him and having fun with him.
"It settled then. It's going to be our place" Rafe marked it, still over the moon that Hope really agreed with his ideas.
"Not so fast, I still want to taste the food first before we make it official" Hope debates, just to tease him and she actually already agreed with it even without her to taste the food.
She knows it's going to be great, she knows that Rafe isn't going to lie about it if he actually loves this place.
"You're not going to regret it, trust me" he assured.
"Mm-hm, let's see shall we?"
"Here we go" he said while clasping his hands together when the waiter come back with a tray that fill with their drinks and their foods they ordered earlier.
Hope can't help to feel excited and seeing that Rafe is also as equal as her, it only boost her mood. He's been keeping his words so far, he didn't cause any scene or even get mad at her or anything. He looks very determine this time, like he actually meant everything he said and Hope is so grateful for it.
She wants him to stay like this, she loves him like this. Rafe that being nothing but so sweet and nice, just like he used to be.
"You love coffee, right?" Rafe asked when the waiter drops down their orders onto the table, keeping his gaze right on her that seems occupied with the meals. He can see the twinkle of excitement behind her eyes and he can't help to smile even more.
"Yeah, fucking love it" She nods, people around her are actually aware about that obsession she had over it.
Sarah always complaining about her ability to wake up and go straight for her caffeine instead of do anything else. She also can go a day without nothing but coffee, that kinda worry her parents sometimes.
"You need to taste the coffee they made here, it's fucking good" Rafe announced.
"Really?" she perks up, she always down for any suggestion for good coffee.
"Yeah, taste it by yourself" Rafe confirmed it, gesturing to the cup of coffee that just placed on the table.
Noticing how her face got more brighter at the mentioned of coffee, he knows she's got the love for the caffeine since forever. That's the reason why he brings her here, because he knows this place provided the good one.
He also ordered one for himself even though he's not really a coffee lover himself but like he said, they made a good coffee here so he can't help to have a cup for himself.
And now he's got a company to have one with him, Rafe just needs to do it with her. With Hope out of people, of course he's not going to push the opportunity away.
Hope thanked the waiter when he's done putting down their orders before he backed away to do another job. She ordered for an omelette and a waffle with chocolate syrup for herself. She always went with those choices for her breakfast. Unless she feels like she wants something extra than her usual order, she's gonna order for something else.
She goes for the coffee first, grabbing the cup before she brings it closer to her mouth. She blows it a little so it didn't get too hot and burned her tongue before she's sipping it slowly.
When the warm liquid starts to go down to her throat, she let out a soft groan "God, you're right" she chimes, taking another sip from her cup letting the sweet, creamy and bitter smile mixing up on her tongue.
"How is it?" Rafe asked, knowing that he's just telling her the truth about the coffee and the girl just experience it herself.
"It's a crime that you didn't tell me earlier about this place" Hope mutters when she's done sipping the coffee.
"Well, we're here, aren't we?"
"We're so gonna come here again after this." Hope said.
She's already sold only by the coffee and she can make sure the rest of the menus can be as good as the coffee. There's no doubt in it.
Rafe beams once again "So, it's official now? We can make this our spot?"
"Mm-hm, it is official" Hope confirmed it "Our spot it is"
"Bring it on, baby"
Hope smiles widely when she heard the name. She doesn't know if he actually realized what he said but she likes it. But what she didn't know is, this is also the second time he called her that but she's too sleepy to notice it this morning.
"Yeah" She said, keeping her smile at him while Rafe mirroring the same one like hers.
"Go ahead, eat your breakfast" Rafe pointed at the table that already full with their meals.
Hope nods and continue to dig on the waffle first, the chocolate that drizzle on top of it making her stomach growl. She picks up on her cutlery, ready to eat.
She can't wipe out the smile from her lips and after the stressful events she had, she starts to feel ease down a bit. Mostly because Rafe really keep his words to be better and make up for everything. And everything he did today really already make up to it.
Rafe also as happy as her, especially when he keep seeing the big smile flashing out from her face.
His eyes moves from her face down to her neck where he caught a shiny jewellery lingering around her throat. It's the necklace that he bought for her for the midsummer and it actually making him to feel proud that she's still wearing it.
He actually can't believe that he didn't notice it before even though she's literally just sleeping right next to him last night. And he just noticed now, when she's right in front of him enjoying her food?
"You still wearing that?" Rafe spoke, averting his gaze from her neck to his plate. Shoving a spoon into his mouth.
Hope looks up from her plate "Wearing what?" she's cocking her brows.
"The necklace" He pointed at it with his finger.
Hope stops chewing for a while, looking down to her neck where she can see the pendant dangling. She actually forgot about it, she's not even realized that she's still wearing it. Everything that happened making it kinda invisible and just--be there.
"Yeah, I did" Hope states, looking back at him.
Rafe let out a hummed "Do you--do you like it?"
"What? the necklace?" she asked again.
"Yeah"
"Of course I liked it, it's pretty" she confirmed "Or else I won't be wearing it to the midsummer"
"But do you like it even after the midsummer?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, like, are you going to wear it for you know, everyday? Even without any special events or anything?" he explained.
"Do you want me to wear it for everyday?" she asked.
Because if she's actually being honest, she doesn't even realizes about the necklace until Rafe pointed it out now. She was on the run and was a mess, she didn't really have time to remove it from her neck.
But if Rafe wants her to keep it on her, she has no problem with that too. She loves the necklace and she loves jewellery so much. She can wear it along with her other necklaces.
"If you want to. It would be an honor for me if you actually do that" Rafe said, even though he really wants her to keep wearing it.
He loves seeing her wearing a thing that he bought for her. It remind him that she's belong to him, not anyone else.
"Okay, I'll keep it with me then" Hope confirmed it.
Rafe smile once again, this time it brighter than before "It suits you very well, Mia. You should keep wearing it with you, you look so pretty with it" he compliments her.
She can feel her cheeks heated up "Don't say such thing, Rafe" she said, not believing him.
"I'm telling you the truth, you are pretty" he assured, leaning closer to the table "And pretty girl like you deserved pretty things, like that necklace"
"That's so sweet of you" She mutters, the streak of blush already appears on her face "But, thank you. I really love this, you chose a beautiful one" she clasped on the pendant, feeling the cold material against her skin.
"Anything for my girl" he beams, showing off his perfect teeth "Like I said, you deserved it"
"Thank you again, Rafe"
"Do you like it? When I bought you these things?" he asked again, wanting to know her perspective about him buying her expensive things.
He knows Hope is a spoiled girl herself, her dad can provide a lot more expensive things for her more than Rafe can offer. Hope is familiar with all the wealthy things, she's grew up in that way.
But he's still want to keep giving her those, because she deserved it. She deserved to be spoiled with all the expensive things, just like she was born for. She's a Kook, that's what she is.
Something that JJ can't give or even afford, the life that Hope was born for. A Pogue like him won't understand, because he has no idea what's their life looks like. JJ only going to make Hope's life miserable, just like him. Just like the rest of the Pogues.
Rafe is going to give her that life, a Kook life for her. That's what she is, that's who she is and he's going to work hard for that. He doesn't care if he needs to beg his father for any jobs, he's willing to do it so he can let Hope lives the way she wants.
With him, not with JJ.
"Like the necklace?" She asked again. Not quite understand it.
"Yeah, the necklace, all the jewellery perhaps. The expensive things or even bring you to the fancy place like this to have a breakfast" he explained, slowly chewing his food.
Hope pursed her lips at the question, because that actually intrigued her. Of course she likes it, because this is what her life looks like since forever. She's been living in this way since she was even born.
Like her mom said before, this is what she's destined for. This is her life that she should be, not other way around.
But sometimes it's not really what she wants, she wants to feel something different, she wants a life out from the bubble wrapped that her parents putting around her from the outside world. The world that provides something better and adventurous than her luxurious and well planned life.
A life that everything already got planned by her parents for the future that she has no choices than follows the trails. A life that already she got pictured her own future what she's gonna become and ends up like.
She doesn't want that life anymore, not after she met JJ. After she knows him and what he can offer and show to her. That's the life she wants, a life with him. She doesn't care about anything else, or what people talked about it.
But right now, she can't really tell that to Rafe. Because in front of her isn't JJ that going to offer her a life outside the bubble wrapped. That going to show her the other side of life that she never experienced before.
This is Rafe, a guy that going to give her the life that she's destined for just like her parents want her to. That going to give her the life that needs her to be a certain type of person that her parents shaped her from the age one, a life that she needs to live as.
"Of course I like it, Rafe. It's fun, this is so fun" Hope halfheartedly answer, just realized how wrong it is to be here with Rafe instead of JJ. Or even doing it with Rafe instead of JJ, she remembered about the date that he promised her.
A Pogue style date and a full Kook date.
"So--I can keep buying you a lot of expensive things?" he asked again.
"You don't have to do that Rafe, you don't have to waste your money on me" She mutters it, a little bit uncomfortable with him trying to buy her things when he should be thinking about himself.
Like he's still doesn't even have a place to stay or even a job for him to keep going for his life. She doubts that Ward is going to provide any for him or even care enough to give some to him.
"But I want to" Rafe insisted "I love it, buying things for you. That's means I take a good care of you and I'm making you feel good"
"I know, but it's just unnecessary. You can do a lot of things with the money, other than me"
"But I'm making you feel good, right? You feel good when I bought you things? Just like I did for the midsummer with the necklace" he continues.
She paused a little before she nods hesitantly "Yeah, I did" she confirmed, she did feel good.
Because she thought that Rafe is going to make her midsummer better, before he ruined everything by went after JJ.
She almost cringed out every time she remembered about the incident. It stills planted inside her mind, loud and clear.
"Then, why can't I keep doing it to you?"
"It's not like you can't do that, of course you can" Hope drops her fork and spoon "It just--you have a lot of things to think right now. Like a place to stay and how to convince your dad to get you back home or something. You don't even have money with you, you can't waste those on me. It's not going to make me feel good anymore"
Rafe licks his dry lips when Hope mentioned about his current problems and he's got brought to a real life back. She's right, of course. He's got enough on his plate to think right now, but he doesn't care about that. All he can think right now is to take care of her, so she's not bolt away from him.
"I know--" he mumbles "But what if I already got that. What if I already got a place to stay and a job to keep or even succeed to convince my dad that I'm getting better? Will you let me do that to you?"
"I don't know" she hesitates, looking asay from him "I mean, if you're already stable enough with your life then why not?'
"If I already stable with my life, you're gonna let me spoiled you, Mia? Buy you things and shits just to make you feel good?" he continues again, wanting to hear that from Hope.
He wants to hear it from her, he wants to know if she actually wants him to do that to her.
Hope swallowed hard, the tone from Rafe making her to get anxious again. She never likes to have this conversation with him, he always so persuasive and never really knows how to back out.
She always had a hard time to deal with this side of him and it always end up with an argument.
"Yes, Rafe. I guess you can do that" she retorted.
"That's means, you want to live with me someday?"
"Like--like move in with you?"
"Yeah" Rafe nods, he already abandoned his meals completely and only focused on her "Move in with me"
"We talked about this yesterday, Rafe" she sighed, leaning against the chair.
"I know, I know but you refused to live with me because you're still young and I'm barely an adult to you. And I don't even have a stable job to keep us breathing" Rafe exclaimed "But what if we do that when both of us are fully adults and I already got the job to keep?"
He understands if Hope doesn't want to do that with him because some of the reasons, but what if he finally make it all better?
"I don't know Rafe, it's not something that I want to discuss right now"
"Why not?"
"I'm trying to have a breakfast, okay? Just--just pick another topic that doesn't need me to think"
"It's not that hard, you don't have to think about it hardly. Just give me the answer, yes or no. It's a simple question" Rafe shrugged, while can't help to feel paranoid why she didn't want to answer it right away.
Why would she needs to think about it? It's not really that hard to answer, it's not even a mind tricked question. Unless she doesn't want to answer it. That's means she doesn't want to do that with him, she doesn't want to live with him.
"Rafe, please. We already talked about this and I already told you the answer" Hope pleads, she's not comfortable the direction of this conversation going.
He let out a breath "You didn't want to live with me" he mutters, knowing the answer"Yeah, right. Because we're not a couple or something. Of course, that bullshit answers"
That startling her a little "Mind your words when you're talking to me" she snapped "You don't get to get mad at me again. I already told you the answer, just like yesterday and you said you're not mad anymore"
Rafe close his eyes for quick seconds, shifting on the chair.
"Plus, it's my life. You can't force me to do something that I don't want to do" she continues again "You need to learn to respect that instead of bossing me around like I'm your bitch or something"
Rafe peered open his eyes immediately when he heard the words from her "You--you're not a bitch" he quickly said "And you're not even my bitch. Please don't say that, I don't like it"
Hope is far than a bitch, she's nothing like that. And hearing that coming from her making him feels uncomfortable, he didn't like how it sounds from her mouth.
"Then, why are you keep pressuring me to get what you want and throwing out your tantrum when I refused to do it?" she argued, already lost her appetites.
She hates Rafe for ruining their morning all over again, she thought today is going to be perfect and he's not going to ruin it. It seems like he can't keep his act more than few minutes before he starts his shit again.
"Okay, I'm sorry, all right? I'm sorry for bringing it up again, I'm sorry for forcing you to follow me" Rafe leaning forward against the table, his hands rise up on the air to explain himself "I just--I just want to know if you actually like me spoiled you, okay? Because I'd love to do that to you. That's it, we don't have to talk about moving in anymore, I'm not going to bring that up"
Hope frowns while keep her eyes on him "I don't mind if you want to talk about it, but you need to accept my answers if you asked me some questions. That's how things worked, not keep pressuring me to agree with you and you start to burst out when it didn't go in your way"
"I'm sorry, all right? I promised I'm not gonna do that again. Please, can we just drop it and back with our breakfast?" He pleads, just like he always did when he screwed things up and Hope hates it how she's always falls for it every time.
"If you keep behaving like this, I don't think I can keep going with you" she continues, ignoring his attempt to apologize and brush thing as always.
"Don't say that, Mia" he states, the panic suddenly rush into him "I'm not going to bring it anymore, okay? Swear. We can just forget about it"
She shook her head "Okay, fine" she sighed, rubbing her forehead a little "I'm sorry for snapping at you. I just don't want those silly conversations ruined our time here, I'm having fun with you now. I'm trying to keep it fun as long as I can"
A smile is back on his lips "You're having fun with me?" he asked, that actually caught his attention.
"Of course, I like that you're bringing me here with you and we get to do this again" she nods and she's not lying this time "I love doing this with you, Rafe. I am having fun with you"
The smile on his lips grows bigger "I love to do this with you too, Mia" he replied "I'm sorry for whatever I said earlier, just forget about it, okay? We can keep having fun, I promised I won't ruin it"
Hope smiles again "Okay' she nods "You're lucky that this coffee is literally the best thing I ever had for my 16 years of life or else I won't tolerate with you anymore"
Rafe let out a small chuckle "Yeah, guess I know what to do after this to win you back when I screwed up again" he teased.
Hope rolls her eyes "It's not that easy, you can't bribe me with a coffee just like that!"
"Gotta take every shot I got, right? Just trying my luck"
"That's not going to work. Like at all"
"I rather not to see if it's actually work because that's means I'm gonna screw things and that's the last thing I want to do. Not again" He shook his head, he's trying to reduce any possibility for Hope to drop everything and run from him.
Hope can't help to agree with him "Yeah, I rather not to find out about it too"
"Glad that we're in a same page" He pursed his lips, his hands start to find the way back with his cutlery.
She just smile at him and the boy focused back on his plate. Hope let out a small breath, glad that they're not fall into any argument because that's going to stress her out.
When she's about to go back go her meal just like Rafe, she heard her phone chiming couple of times from her pocket. She quickly reaches in for the device, knowing exactly the sender. She already set a specific notification for it, for Sarah.
Rafe stops chewing his food halfway, his eyes automatically darting on Hope who already holding her phone. His heart starts to beat faster, thumping against his ribcage. In his mind, he only can think of one possibility.
JJ is back on texting her and that's going to ruin his work earlier and if Hope ever found out about it, he's going to be in a deep shit. Though he can lie about it or even talk his way out, there's no guarantee that Hope is going to believe him or actually forgive him for it.
Hope is still got her eyes on the screen, reading the text she's got from Sarah. Rafe watching her nervously from his chair, waiting for Hope to react to know if it's actually from JJ or someone else. He can't even swallow his food properly, almost choked himself out.
"Who is it?" Can't wait any longer, he open his mouth to ask about it himself. He starts to sweat out.
Hope looks up from the screen "It's Sarah" she informed but she doesn't look piss or mad.
Rafe let out a small breath, glad that it's not JJ. But it's still not a good news to him, especially when it's about Sarah. His sister probably hanging around the Pogues and JJ could tell her about the texts. Maybe Sarah asked her about it, he starts to panic once again.
"What did she wants?" he asked again, playing it cool by shoving his food into his mouth. Trying not to look panic.
"Nothing" Hope shrugged "Said that she wants to see me if I'm free"
His eyed widened "What for?"
"I don't know, she didn't tell me. Said she's got something to tell and apparently important enough so we can't talk over a phone" she continues.
In her mind, maybe Sarah wants to talk about JJ or maybe she's already knows that she's currently with Rafe. Hope knows she's going to berate her over this, that she ditched JJ just because she wants to be with Rafe. She already can see the argument that coming for her from Sarah.
But Rafe got another story that playing inside his mind.
"When?" He continues to ask.
Hope paused a little, because she's also currently asked the blonde about it. She didn't answer it yet, but her phone chiming again giving her the answer.
"Tonight" She answered, look up to Rafe.
She doesn't even know why Rafe keep asking her about it but she's not even bother to answer. There's nothing wrong with it, Sarah is still his sister after all.
Rafe swallowing hard once again, he knows ain't no way that's going to happen because he won't allow it. He's not going to let it happen, he's not letting Hope to go out and meet Sarah. He's not going to risk it, with the probability that Hope won't come back to him and knows the truth.
He needs to come up with anything just to prevent her from to meet his sister.
"Do you--do you want to go?" He nervously asked.
"I guess, it looks important" She answered, though she's actually trying not to have any conversations about what she did with Sarah. She knows exactly how the girl is going to react.
Rafe nods his head, running his fingers through his hair while his breath starts to get uneven. He's bouncing his legs nervously, he can feel the beads of sweat on his forehead.
"Tell her that you're not going" He suddenly said, his tone sounds a little bit shaky yet still demanding.
Hope shoots him a look, surprised that coming out from him "What? Why?" she confusedly ask.
"It's uh--you can't go" He stuttered, running out of excuses to give out.
"Why can't I go?" She questioned again, she starts to feel uneasy.
Rafe's not possibly--locking herself with him, right? She can go wherever she wants if she wants to without him going crazy about it. He's not even trying to control her or anything, right?
Hope swallows a little bit hard, she's trying not to think the worst about him but she can't keep the thought out of her mind. He's not turning into someone like that, right?
"Do you have a plan tonight that required me to be with you?" Hope continues to ask when Rafe looks a bit struggle to come out with answers.
Rafe chews his lips "Yes, I had--I had a plan" he confirmed, stating it quickly "And I need you to be with me"
"What plan?" Hope pushed him again, wanting to know if he's lying or not.
"I already plan for a dinner for us" He mutters that when the idea come out from his mind and he's grateful that it comes in at the right time and it's almost smooth when he said about it.
Yeah, a dinner would be a good idea. He needs to make it happens, he needs to keep Hope with him.
Her mouth gape open for seconds, her eyes widened "A--a dinner?" she asked, the sentence almost can't get out from her mouth.
"Yeah, a dinner"
"Tonight?"
"Yes, tonight"
Hope starts to think that Rafe is crazy, maybe the lack of drugs in his system causing the boy to talk nonsense.
"A dinner, Rafe? Are you crazy?" she squeals, her face contorted with disbelief look.
Rafe remains calm, trying not to show much expression "What? What's crazy?"
"Are you going to pay it by yourself?" she asked.
He sucked his inner cheek at the mentioned of him needs to pay for it "Of course I'm gonna pay it. Just like I always did, like I should do" he confirmed.
"You don't have any money, Rafe. How are you going to do that?
She knows she has no problems to pay for it since her father already bank in some money in his card that she currently hold. But she also knows that Rafe won't allow that from happen, he's not going to let her do that no matter how hard she insisted for it.
And since he's in the middle of crisis right now, she doesn't think he has much choices. She doesn't even know if this restaurant actually allowing him to put the price into Ward's name instead of them paid for it. This already sounds crazy to her.
But she can't really say a thing because Rafe assured her that everything will be just fine. That he's got everything handled.
"I can figure that out, you don't have to worry about it" he states, though he actually has no ideas how to.
"Don't tell me you're going to put it on Ward's name again, Rafe. I don't think I'm gonna let that happen"
"No, I won't do that tonight" Rafe deny it, he leans forward once again so he's got closer to her "I already planned it all, okay? I'll take care of it and you don't have to think about it. Just--just go to a dinner with me tonight"
Rafe is still trying to convince her again to agree with his plan. He doesn't care how is he's going to make it work or even to get some money to pay for it tonight. All he cares is Hope isn't going anywhere out of his sight much less to see Sarah. He won't let that happened.
Hope is hesitates, she looks unsure with him and she's actually not even confident about it. But Rafe looks convincing, he looks very determined with it.
"Why are you telling me right now, Rafe? Are you trying to prevent me from seeing Sarah?" she asked, finally throws out her paranoid about it "I'm allow to go wherever I want, right? You're not going to control me or anything?"
"What? No, of course not. Why would I do that, it's--it's horrible. I could never do that to you, of course you're free to go wherever you want" Rafe quickly answered to it even though he's sweating really hard right now. His legs keep bouncing really hard under the table.
"Then, why are you telling me now?" she added up. Still not satisfied.
Rafe takes a breath and slowly let it go, telling himself to calm down and try not to blow it off. He needs to look convincing, he needs to sound confident with his answers that he wants to give out.
He can lie, it's not the first time he did it.
"I'm going to tell you later, after the breakfast and when we're going to buy new clothes for you. Thought we can buy a dress or something for tonight, you know, to make you look good. That's because I thought you don't have any plan and has all day with me" He starts, letting the lies rolling out from his mouth smoothly.
Hope keep being silence, she actually buying into his story
"And since you're obviously got a plan, I thought maybe I should tell you now" He continues, keeping his face as convincing as he can. Not showing much expression to her.
"Why tonight? Why not another time?" Hope questioned.
"I just thought since we already started with breakfast, maybe we can keep going with a dinner" He adds up.
"But right now? During this time when you're still trying to figure things out with yourself?" she continues "I don't mind to have a dinner with you, Rafe. Hell, I'll do it hundreds time with you. But you need to think about yourself right now, not me"
Rafe smile plainly at the expression and concerns from her. He's still manages to find comfort from her words even during this time.
"I told you that you don't have to worry about it, I'll take care of everything" He assured, keeping his gazes straight on her to make it more convincing "Just like always did. I take care of a lot of things, I take care of us"
"I don't know Rafe. I don't even know what to think" she pursed her lips, she feels trapped a little.
"Please, let's go to a dinner with me. I promise I'll take care of everything and make it worth it" He pleads once again "You said you want to keep having fun with me, don't you want to have more fun with me?"
Hope doesn't know what to say or even to respond right now. She wants to go and see Sarah, she wants to explain to her about everything. But seeing Rafe like this, she can't really say no. He looks very excited and even eager for it.
"Of course I want to have more fun with you, Rafe" she replied, giving him soft smile.
"Then, why are you hesitate about it?"
"I just don't want to burden you with something silly like this. Just because you feel like you need my forgiveness or even to make up for what you did" She states "I told you it's fine, you don't have to keep milking about it"
Though she's not entirely forgives him for what happened at the midsummer and for what he did to JJ, doesn't mean she wants him to waste his times and money for something like this just so he can prove himself to her. It's a little too much, she's fine with just an apology and him promised to keep himself behave.
"It's not enough, Mia. I need to know that I actually keeping my words for you. I really want you to know that I'm really want to make it right this time, that I won't fuck up again" He continues to assure her, he wants her to believe him and fall right into it.
She chews her lips, she's definitely not going to say no for this "God, Rafe. You're doing things to me" she sighed, shaking her head.
Rafe beams at her "Please, Mia--" he begged again, really wants her to say yes for it. He would get on his knees if he actually needs to.
"Fine, fine" Hope finally giving in "I'll tell Sarah to set up for another time" she announced.
Rafe let out a breath of relief when he heard that from her, God knows how fucking relief he is right now even though he needs to come up with another plan on how to make this 'dinner' actually work. Not just a bait from him to prevent Hope from going anywhere.
"That's my girl" Rafe states with a satisfied smirk on his lips "See, I told you that we're going to have more fun together"
She rolls her eyes "You're literally a pain in my ass sometimes. You keep doing this to me" she complained, but she's not really actually meant it.
Rafe laugh softly, he hold out his hand across the table to reach out for Hope. His hand find its way to her face, splaying his palm on the side of her face before his thumb caressing her cheek softly with so much care.
Hope remains as a statue when she feels his touch on her skin, sending a lot of emotions all over her body. The tender touch from him making her body on fire, especially when his ocean gazes looking at her with so much expression.
"You're my girl, all right? And it's my job to take care of you and making you feel good" He mutters it.
She smiles, leaning into his touch even more "I know" she said.
"Good" he mumbles.
Rafe keep brushing her cheek softly, his eyes lingering around her pretty face before it falls right on her plump lips. He swallows hard, because he's been wanting to feel her lips against his for so long now, in more proper way of course instead of do it like he did at the midsummer.
He always regret that action from him, he can't brush away thd betrayal look from her that night. It's actually did something on him, seeing her giving him the look.
He looks away from staring on her lips to back to her eyes. He convinced himself that maybe his day will come, a day that he's finally able to kiss Hope properly just like he wants, without either of them force it.
One day.