Crystal POV
It's been two months since everything transpired and honestly I'm still not okay. I try to drown myself with work but it seems to just make everything worse.
Devale has been trying to talk to me but I just can't. I can't afford to breakdown again. The only time we will ever exchange a few words is when I'm dropping the kids off or he's coming to pick them up but other than that, nothing.
The twins have been asking me a lot of questions regarding the situation, and I've been honest with them. They are at the age where they can see the changes that's happening around them. They can feel the energy between their father and I. So, I sat them down and told them that we were on a break.
I didn't tell them about the cheating though. I don't want them to create an image of their father. Regardless of what he did, he's an amazing father and I don't want what he did to me to jeopardize his relationship with his daughters.
I can't lie, I do miss him. A lot actually. When you've been with the same person for fifteen years, you can't help but to miss him. I'm not mad at him anymore, I just can't face him right now. I also can't put the full blame on him because he does think he was drugged but still, you should have brought your ass home.
But I have been thinking about the drug thing. It's just not making sense. Who would intentionally drug Devale? So me being me, I had the owner of the club send me over the footage of that night. I want to watch it with Devale so I have yet to see it.
I don't think I can take it though. Seeing him getting drunk, seeing that girl dance on him, seeing him walk out the club with her. I don't know if I can take it. I will ask him about watching it soon though.
But I know as soon as he come over, I might cave in. I mean, who wouldn't? I can't afford that because I've been doing really good with avoiding him and I refuse to-
" We need to go out this weekend because you've been in this funk and quite frankly, I can't keep dealing with it. So we're going out this weekend and hopefully whatever it is that is going on with you, will go away for a little bit. " Liyah said as she burst in my office
" well hello to you too Aaliyah. How is your day going? " I asked sarcastically
" It's going well, how's yours going besides you being stuck in this office all day. " She said
" I've just been catching up on emails and I had two zoom calls earlier. " I said lying straight through my teeth. Ever since that day, i've just been isolated from everyone really, except my kids.
" you know I know you right? I especially know when you're lying so Crystal please talk to me. What's been going on babe? " She asked grabbing my hands
I wanted to tell her but I don't want her to create an image of Devale either. I always learned that sometimes you can't let people in on your relationship. Because what you tell them will stick. You may forgive the person but they won't.
" Listen, i'm okay. I just haven't been feeling well lately, that's all. " I said. Now that wasn't a lie. I've been sick ever since that night.
" I feel like you're leaving something out but I will take your word for it and wait till you're ready to talk about it. We should still go out though. I heard it's this new club in town and I feel like we should check it out. " She said
"Are you sure Isaiah is going to let you out of his sight ? " i asked teasing her. She started giggling like a maniac.
" I love my man honey, but he can survive without me for a couple of hours. I'll make it up to him. " she said sending off a wink.
"Y'all are disgusting." I said letting out a fake gag
" You knew this already. I'm about to head home to him though. Text me when you made your decision. " She said as she walked out the office
" she is a mess jesus " i said letting out a giggle.
Since everyone is out of the office, I start packing up so I can head home. Devale texted me saying he is bring the kids by so I have to meet him there.
Thirty minutes later I arrived home and immediately went to take a shower. In the mist of my shower I heard commotion downstairs so I knew the kids were home.
So I hurried out the shower and got dressed so I can spend time with my kids before it's time for them to get ready for bed.
I walked down the stairs and was immediately greeted by the twins.
" hey mommy! " they said in unison. Every time they do that, it always creeped me out but I always thought it was adorable at the same time.
" hi my babies! How was school ? " I asked as we lead to the couch. I sat down comfortably and both of them sat down on each side.
" It was good. Cheer practice was canceled again due to the coach being sick once again. I'm tired of her getting sick. Just take some medicine and you will be okay. It's not that hard. " Amoura said rolling her eyes.
" Amoura stop. You know Ms.Honey is pregnant. She can't take medicine all the time because it can affect the baby . Stop being stupid. " Alana said rolling her eyes
" do you want to get bitten again? Like seriously do you? If not, shut up. " Amoura said rolling her eyes
" Girls, chill out. It's not that serious. Go upstairs and get settled in. Where is your brother? " I asked
" he's in the kitchen with dad, along with Autumn " Alana said and I nodded.
As I watched the girls walk upstairs, I stayed on the couch debating on if I should go in the kitchen or not. I do have to start dinner so I decided to man up and go to the kitchen.
As soon as I walked in the kitchen, I felt a pair of eyes on me. The only eyes that can have me fall to my knees, literally.
But I chose to ignore them and walked over to my son who was occupied reading his book.
" Hey baby boy! " I said sending kisses all over his cheeks
" hey mommy. I missed you!" He said with so much excitement in his voice
" I missed you more baby. How was school ? " I asked sitting beside him
" It was good! We worked on the spelling bee words today and I got a cookie for good work! " he said with the brightest smile on his face
" Mommy is so proud of you baby. How about you go upstairs and get settled in, and we will watch your favorite movie tonight. " I said and once again his smile widened. His smiles always made me feel better.
" yes ma'am!" He said as he got up from the seat and headed upstairs.
The silence was very awkward until Devale spoke up.
" I'm sorry. I know I've said it a thousand times but baby I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me and not be mad at me anymore. " He said sincerely
" Devale I'm not mad at you. " I said as i got up. I walked over to him and grabbed Autumn out his arms so I can cuddle with her.
" Then what are we doing Crystal? It hurts me to be away from you, baby please tell me how can we fix this. " He said. I tried to hold back my tears but they immediately started falling.
" You hurt me. I can't just jump back in knowing I'm not fully over it. I just need more time. I'm sorry " I said as I walked away to go put a sleeping Autumn in her bassinet.
As soon as I laid her down, I felt a pair of arms wrap around me . I immediately started breaking down. Everything that I was holding in just started flowing.
" Don't ever apologize for how you feel. I fucked up and I have to face the consequences. I'm not forcing you to take me back just yet. Take all the time you need because I'm not going nowhere. You are the only one I want and I will wait as long as possible. " He said.
I leaned back from his grip and his eyes sparkled. They alternated between my lips, and my eyes. I brushed his face softly as he continued staring into my eyes.
Before I knew it, he'd leaned in and kissed me. As hard as I tried to resist, I couldn't. It's been to long. I kissed him back as my tongue made its way into his mouth and his met mine.
Before we got too carried away, he pulled away and placed his head on mine.
" we're going to get through this baby, I promise. " he whispered as he wrapped his arms around me.
I pray we do.