Narrator's Point Of View
Every story must come to an end, sometimes even before it begins.
Memories, how they carve themselves into every fiber of our being, the lovely ones brings warmth and butterflies, the chaotic memories of the past that kept us up all night, the mistakes that we wish to change, and the painful ones you wish to erase.
Haerin smiled with so much pain and sadness, remembering the memories she had shared with her friends, especially her roommate, the night she met Hanni at a party, the sleepless nights talking on the phone, endless midnight walks, the fun beach house weekend, the banquet, and her most treasured memory of the girl, their kiss. To temporarily let go of the memories that brought her happiness, to say goodbye to the people who meant the world to her, who gave her another chance to feel pure and genuine happiness.
To treat them as mere ghosts of the past, memories to remember on rainy days, slow nights at the hospital, or at a 'Remember when' moment. Her heart aches but she keeps on writing, she was never good with words, but for tonight she tried her best to interpret her unexplainable feelings. "They deserve to know the importance of their existence in my life, even if it's for the last time."
The night she kissed Hanni, solidified a decision she'd been contemplating. The girl was right, she was a damn flight risk, she couldn't deny the fact that she leaves at the most emotionally difficult of times.
"Are you sure about all of this, Rin?" Her brother asks.
It has only been a month since the kiss, a month of preparing for her departure, finally finished with the pile of paperwork her father gave her, to think it was just for business and school, was more of a finalizing the papers she's going to leave behind.
"I need to find answers to what I'm feeling, I need to follow this path that was given to me, and for one, dad's actually happy I'm leaving for London. His only daughter is pursuing Medicine overseas." Haerin was now, back at her family house, in her old bedroom filled with pictures of a person she considered home.
"What about Hanni?" Soobin knew he was pressing on a matter Haerin didn't want to discuss.
"A love story without an ending, I guess. I need to know what she means to me, I can't do that here, not when Jihye's in the picture. Hanni doesn't deserve half of me, not by a long shot."
"And if she realizes that she's not in love with you anymore?" He asked again, Haerin stared at the letters she had made. She's thought about it before.
"That's okay, I'm doing my part in finding my truest feelings for her. I'm not the type to start something under false pretense. Again, she doesn't deserve it, not after what she's been through."
Airport, 12:00am
Haerin's Point Of View
Leaving a place I once called home and friends who saw my weakest and strongest self, a bittersweet ending to my story in a city called Ador.
"Haerin we need to board, keep your shit together, don't weep." We? I looked at my brother, curiously enough, he was smiling.
"Excuse me? We?" I ask
"Do all the soul searching you want, but you need someone you can lean on, and I can confidently say that it's me."
It's too much to ask of you, but wait for me for just a little more. I thought I could find the answers here with you, but I couldn't, because when I start looking all I remember is someone else.
Eunchae's Apartment
Hanni's Point Of View
"You're loving me at my worst but you deserve to be with me at my best, trust me when I say, that's exactly what I'm trying to do. In a world full of mad and mayhem, you're my sweet serenity."
Sincerely,
Kang Haerin
"Those were the last words from her letter." I kept fighting the tears threatening to fall down my cheeks. It's been a week since we received the letters, as soon as Eunchae received a call from Soobin about the letters, she called us and asked us to come over.
"Did Soobin tell you why they left?" Yunjin asks Eunchae who nods her head, the three of us look at her with anticipation.
"Haerin was soul searching?.....I didn't really get it." Yunjin slumped backwards, Hyein groaned in annoyance, and I was disappointed.
"My decision to leave might be a bit shallow, to continue living in denial of what I truly feel, what my life has been for 2 years, I locked myself in a cage where she existed, fed my delusions that she might still come back. I never showed it, I act like I don't care, but deep down, I do, out of all the people I know you'd understand best, Hyein."
"That's what she told me in the letter, just like in Hanni Unnie's letter, indicating she wants to come back better, a better version of herself." Hyein said, she had this bond with Haerin, it was special and calm.
"I hope she knows what she's doing, I didn't let her off the hook for hurting my best friend." Yunjin playful cracks her knuckles.
5 Months Later
Narrator's Point Of View
It was winter filmfest, a university activity Hanni had been rigorously preparing for months, she was drowning herself with projects, university events, and studying to preoccupy her mind from thinking about a certain cat-like girl.
Yunjin, Eunchae, and Hyein had been worried sick, the day they found out Haerin left, Hanni didn't stop to take a breather, she never opened up about the subject, avoided topics that included Haerin, and it was surely exhausting.
But she couldn't do that, not when the girl was halfway across the world figuring out how she wants to live her life.
"Yunjin! Can you get the light for the stage ready? We have band performances later!. I'll handle the promotional booths for the movies" Hanni was everywhere, the girl hadn't had a minute to herself. She was running around the campus garden, organizing the event.
"Han calm your shit, I just finished the make-shift theater at the back." The tall girl was panting, catching her breath beside her best friend.
"Well breath and then work, I have to go help them with the booths." She was about to leave when Yunjin grabbed her wrist and dragged her to a private area.
"What the hell bro!" Hanni slightly shouted, retracting her wrist from Yunjin's hold.
"You haven't had a minute to breath, you need a break, you look like an elephant sat on your whole being."
"I don't need a break, the event starts tomorrow, I need to finish all tasks on my agenda, besides you know I've always been like this." Hanni sighs, tired of her best friend. It was more than just the event, she knew what Yunjin's point was.
"It's not about the event, it's been 5 months since she left, you've been running around the University for 5 months busying yourself, not having time to rest and think, you're not a robot, talk to me, talk to us. I don't wanna come over to your place, seeing your eyes puffy and your hair messy." Yunjin's concerns were heard by Hanni, but what can the smaller girl do? She was at a loss, the only that makes it all bearable was the workload she drowns herself in.
"I'm fine."
"No you're not!"
"I said I'm fine!" Hanni shouts, but quickly apologizes.
"No, you are not" hidden emotions finally emerged from Hanni, her eyes starts to water, and her hands balled in a fist.
"What do you want me to say?!, that I miss Haerin! I do, God knows I do! I don't know why she had to leave, yes it was shallow but also selfish, she could've told me, she could've talked to me too, but she choose not to. She could've told me that she was still In love with her, I would've understand. She didn't even give me a chance to prove that I'm not like Danielle, that she could trust me. Is that what you wanted to hear?" Hanni was already crying, but chuckled soon. What damn high school drama was she in.
"For god's sake, I will not be this petty character, this whole things is idiotic. I'm going back to organizing the event. You should too." Hanni roughly wipes awag stray teardrops from her cheeks.
London, 12:00am
Narrator's Point Of View
"She's probably hating me right now, wishing I tripped and fall face first." Haerin was on her laptop, studying for her exams, while Soobin was helping her memorize key terms to remember.
"She's so that type, but I'm sure she misses you, she may be mad now but she'll soon see it in your light."
"It wasn't a stupid decision, right? To leave like this just because of Jihye and dad."
"Stupid, No, but I believe you could've handled it differently, preferably without moving half way across the world. As for dad, I see no way you could've wiggled your way out of this, but it was your choice to stay longer than needed."
"Do you think she's gonna wait that long?" Haerin lifts her head up to meet his brother's eyes.
"Nothing's guaranteed, but I think she will." His response left Haerin hopeful for the future.
"What happens if she does wait" it was her brother's turn to ask. Silence. In the midst of these 5 months, Haerin had been searching for answers to what Hanni meant to her, staying true to her words in hanni's letter, she wants Hanni to be with her at her best.
"By that time, hopefully, if she did wait. I'll finally be able to give her the Haerin she deserves, that was my promise, and I intend to keep it just for her."
"I hope they understood why you had to go, Last I talked with Hyein, they were in a whirl with why we left, I didn't mention the real problem with father."
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Note: Haerin loves to be away, my bad. Honestly, I was so confused and out of my head when I was writing, I didn't know what to write....sorry