Black Women One Shots

By EvthysDaGawd

32.8K 627 515

Wattpad deleted the book so I'm uploading again and editing the ones from the past. Fluff, Smut and everythi... More

𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫
𝐇𝟖 𝐔
𝐓𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐞𝐚𝐩 (𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐅: 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐅𝐨𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬)
𝐆𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭𝐚 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲 (𝐁𝐚𝐝 𝐇𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐬)
𝐂𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐞𝐥𝐝
𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
𝐁𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝 (𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐅)
𝐀𝐧𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝
𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐓𝐲𝐩𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐍*𝐠𝐠𝐚 (𝐁𝐚𝐝 𝐇𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐬)
𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐎𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬
𝐓𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐫 (𝟏)
𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐒𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐚𝐲𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫 (𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐅)
𝐒𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐲 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫 (𝟏)
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐁𝐚𝐛𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫
𝐓𝐰𝐨 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐝
𝐎𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐥 (𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐅)
𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐈𝐬
𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐃𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 (𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐅)
𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝? (𝐁𝐚𝐝 𝐇𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐬)

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐞𝐥𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐎𝐧𝐞 (𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐅)

1K 18 13
By EvthysDaGawd

Had another update planned but life has been changing so hope you enjoy
————————-

"Cheers to the freakin weekend"

I turn the song off before Nemo pops up, knowing damn well she doesn't like that girl.

Sizzling is heard throughout the kitchen as I make breakfast for everyone. It's Saturday and it seems like the girls had a hard ass week, so I went to the market this morning and decided to cook.

Food is the way to anyone's heart and I want my girls to feel special

Footsteps gain my attention and I look over to see Nemo dragging her feet

"You look like you didn't get enough sleep"

She sits on the counter and rest her head in her hand

"Not fully up yet"

I plate the food and sit it in front of Nemo

"Well, when you gonna be up because I need y'all to come to the mall with me."

Nemo scrunches up her face as she takes a bite

"I really don't feel like doing anything today"

"Just for an hour or two," I pout. "I figured since I'm dating again, I sure update my wardrobe"

"What's wrong with the clothes you have now?"

I look at Denym with a blank stare. My closet is full of sweatpants and t-shirts. I work from home doing IT, so I've never felt the need to have extra shit. Plus I don't go out much. When I say I'm a homebody, I mean that shit

But now that I'm stepping out of my comfort zone, I want to put more effort into my style.

Nemo sighs

"Fine. How's Bumble going anyway?"

"Bitchhhhh"

I put Mika's plate in the microwave and take seat next to Nemo

"These people got me fucked up. First, I learned that I'm supposed to message first due to the policy. Something about women being in control so I lost a couple matches. Second, most of the men only message me to ask if Saint is my real name."

Which pisses me off. It's not like it's an uncommon name or some shit completely out the blue. So to waste my time and a match just to ask makes me mad.

"I don't like it already. Why do you have to message first? I mean you're on a dating app so if you match, you obviously want to talk to the person"

I sigh and eat my bacon

"I know. That's hella pressure on my end but the worst of it...Do you know how many people sent me gifs or memes of Omarion and Marques Houston dancing in the rain. Talking 'bout 'out here doing it for lil Saint."

Nemo throws her head back in laughter and I roll my eyes. I hate people. I really do because shit like this is why I stay to myself. People always wanna play and I know most would be like "take a joke" but do that shit down the line. Not as an opener

"I'm about to hand you bricks to throw because niggas be trying it," Mika says as she walks into the kitchen. She grabs her plate from the microwave and leans on the counter to eat with us.

"What they look like because I feel like the fine ass men aren't on dating apps"

I shrug because for the most part they've been decent. I pulled out my phone and open the app

"We can swipe together"

Both crowd my space and we go through the matches. There's multiple grunts, scoffs, and faces of disgusts but also whistles and faces of intrigue.

We land on one profile making me stop

"Got damn"

"He is fine"

"Too fine. Something gotta be wrong with him"

I scroll down his page and nothing seems abnormal

Christian Holloway. 35, Marvel fan, introvert with extrovert tendencies and these pictures. Sheesh

"35? What's ya age range?"

"27-42"

Both girls nod because the range isn't too crazy. I just feel like men my age don't have shit to talk about. They wanna smoke, party, ride with the boys all the time, etc.

Although there's nothing wrong with that, it's not what I'm looking for. I guess with being married, I've come to appreciate the stability that older guys prioritize.

I swipe right and see that we're a match but also he's the last of my limit for now.

"Ooo bitch"

"I know right," I mumble as I think about what to say. I don't want to be basic and say hi but I don't wanna do some extra shit

I decide to just be honest

Me:
I'm gonna keep it honest. You too fine to be on this app.

I bite my lip and quickly close the app out of nervousness. I can't see him replying. The anxiety would make me jump out of my skin.

"I guess we gotta go to the mall for real"

"Oh we're going to the mall? Lemme get ready"

I collect everyone's plate and quickly wash the dishes before we all get ready and leave for the mall.

We currently raking through the racks of Forever 21 when my phone gets a ping

Christian:
🤣🤣🤣 what does that even mean?

I do little happy dance in my head that he replied

Me:
It means I can named five women who'd look at you and say they'd fuck

Christian:
I-
That's fair lol. I saw ya profile and just had to swipe

I tuck my lips in my mouth to try and stop the blush creeping on my face

Me:
How many times have you used that line? 😒🤣

Christian:
I promise you not many lol. What's fun for you or are you more go with the flow?

Me:
Go with the flow. I'm open to anything as long as the company is good. Go karting, skating, nightlife. Whatever. Hbu?

Christian:
I like to do stuff. Try to stay active.
So I could take you wherever and you'd adapt, is what you're saying ?

Me:
That's exactly what I'm saying

Christian:
I like that 😏. You seem kool. Would you wanna exchange numbers to maybe get more acquainted?

"You've been standing there for five minutes, cheesing hella hard."

"She's scaring me. Over there with a smile like Jim Carry's the Grinch''

"I hate both of y'all but Christian messaged me back and we exchanged numbers"

We all do a little celebratory two step before walking to another section. My phone buzzes again

Well aren't I popular today

Expecting a text Christian, I frown when I see the contact name. I roll my eyes and Mika notices

"What's wrong? Is it the dumbass?"

"Remember when I went to that wedding in St Louis and I was talking to that guy"

"You mean the one with a funny looking head?" Nemo butts in, making me cackle.

A friend of mine from high school got married a few months back. It was my first time really being out since the separation so I made sure I looked the fuck good.

Grained the attention from hella guys but only really "connected" with one. Let's call him "Pequeño" because I quickly found out he had small dick energy.

We went out the first night to a bar and he didn't come because "making money is more important" but he wasn't making money, he was home

Took offense to my lingo and told me that if I called him "my guy" again, I'd cease to exist but never told me why he hates the term or that he hated it, matter of fact

Said I was mean to a girl I never talked to and told me he wished I was staying longer. Because he took a vow of celibacy that was ending right after the wedding. As if I would let that nigga hit

That's why his name is Red Flag in my phone

"Yeah. That one"

"The fuck he want?"

I look at the message and it just says "Hey"

"To waste my fucking time"

I ignore the message. Men like him are also the reason I've been hesitant on dating. So full of themselves they become delusional and blind to the reality around them

I don't want to be with another man who makes me feel like I have to cater to them in order to feel validated

I want genuine love and peace. Why do people feel like that's asking for too much?

Finding everything I want, I go to the register and pay. We hit up Zara and a few more stores before stopping by the Great Cookie to get a bucket of snickerdoodles

"I feel like today was successful," Nemo says as we hop in the car

My phone buzzes with a next from an unknown number

***.***.****
Hey it's Christian from Bumble

Today was definitely successful

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