𝙳𝚎𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗, 𝚜𝚞𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚋𝚎𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚊𝚗
-𝙹𝚊𝚗𝚎𝚝 𝙵𝚒𝚝𝚌𝚑
◦╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╱◇╲╳╳╳╳╳╳╳◦
"She hasn't come out of the room to eat at all." I hear a muffled voice say from outside the door.
"You just need to give her time. Everyone deals with the news differently." Another muffled voice says.
I haven't left the bed since I got there. We are on the train back to 4. After I threw up in the garden Finnick had to tell the women he was with that he had to end early and we left. We came back to the train and I tried to scrub everything that felt wrong on my body.
I haven't gotten up to use the bathroom or to eat. I feel if I try to eat I would just throw it up anyways. I just need time to process what the rest of my life is going to look like.
What I see the rest of my life looking like is men having me in their bed, hiding my relationship with Finn, and being one of the most desired victors.
I hear the doors open, but I don't make the effort to turn my head to look at who opened the door. The bed dips down, but I still don't look. "Dels." Finn's soft voice says. He's trying to get me to look at him. "Dels please." I looked at him when he said that. He has so much desperation in his voice.
"Yes" I say with a sweet smile that doesn't quite reach my eyes.
"Are you alright?" He asks.
"I'm completely fine." I say with the same smile. "Are we almost home?"
"Dels..."
"I have no idea what you are worried about. I am perfectly fine. I have the perfect life. Perfect family. Perfect relationships. I have no idea what you are worried about."
"Dels you know exactly what I'm talking about."
"Finn..." I say, my voice cracking a little.
"Come here." He says barely above a whisper, opening his arms. I moved over to him. I'm sitting on his lap with my head buried in his chest and his arms around me.
"I don't want to do this." I cry. "I can't." He keeps his arms tightly around me as a cry. I can't help but feel small in this world. It feels like everything is coming down on me all at once. The world is crumbling and I'm the one who has to try and keep it from falling.
Everything I have known has been a lie. My parents' death. The consequences of people's actions and the glorious life of a victor. No one ever wins the games. You just merely survive it.
"We're going to work through this. We will get through this." Finn says.
We will make it.
※※※
Waking up with Finnick is the only thing making this day any better. Maybe also knowing that I can see my siblings soon too. Also the training room. I need some sort of distraction and Caspian is going to be eligible to be reaped for the 70th hunger games and I want him to be prepared.
So there are a couple of things I am looking forward to, but still doesn't make this shitty week any less shitty. Just knowing that I only have another 6 months until I have to be sold sends shivers down my back.
I'm not going to let him get under my skin anymore. I won't cry over what was inevitably going to happen to me.
I hear Finnick groan. He lifts his hands to rub his eyes. Damn. How does this man make everything look so hot? "Morning." I say smiling.
"Morning, beautiful." He says with a morning voice. He leans forward and kisses me. I smile into the kiss enjoying our little moments we have together. "Are you excited to go home?" He asks.
"Yeah." I say softly. "I'm excited to see Casp and Maisy again." I say smiling. After a moment of silence I ask, "Can we start the training room tomorrow?"
"We can start whenever you want." He says smiling. I smile and we lay back down. Finn breaks the silence and says, "Can you please eat something today. At least so you have some energy to run around with Maisy and Casp."
This damn man. He always has to bring them into this to make me feel guilty. "Sure." I mumble.
He kisses my forehead and starts to get up from the bed. I cover my face with the covers trying to make him forget about me, but he pulls the covers down and pulls my arms toward him. "Come on."
"But I don't want to." I say groaning.
"Cordelia." He says with a warning tone.
I frown and get up from the bed. We walk out of the room and into the dining cart. I haven't seen anyone since the party so when they see me they all stop their conversations.
"Mornin' kiddo." Cody says, lifting up his glass.
"Morning." I say with a small smile. Me and Finn walk toward the table and he grabs two plates for himself and I.
"What do you want?" He asks, softly.
"Hmm. Just some fruit and maybe a pancake." I say.
He smiles. "Okay!"
I walk over to sit next to Cody. He pulls out the chair next to him. I mutter a thank you.
"So, whatcha going to do when you get back home?" He asked me.
"Well I'm first going to take you to the meadow, but that can wait until after I hang out with my siblings."
"Wow! So I'm second best?"
"Third best." I say with a smirk.
"Let me guess, Fish Stick over here is before me." He says, pointing to Finnick who is now sitting beside me.
"What did I do?" Finn asks, setting down both of our plates.
"Nothing. Cody is just mad that my best friend and boyfriend come before him." I say smiling. "You should also know that no one comes before my siblings. They're the last bit of family I have and at this point they're basically my own kids." I say shrugging.
"Still should be before Fish Stick." Cody grumbles.
I just shake my head and laugh. I look down at the plate of food. There is a single pancake with syrup only, cause who likes butter on their pancakes? The fruit are grapes, pineapple, cantaloupe, strawberries, and honeydew. I wish watermelon was in season right now, but of course, it's not.
My favorite fruit on this plate right now would have to be the strawberries or cantaloupe. When my parents would forget to feed me I would have to go out to the little fruit farms that some people had and the ones that I would take were the strawberries because they were the easiest ones to take without people noticing. Mrs. Mable was the one who would give me the cantaloupes.
She was like the grandmother I never got to have. I never knew my grandparents and whenever I would bring them up my parents would switch the subject. I remember one time my father had said a little bit but I can barely remember what he said. It might have been because I was born when my parents were young. It's the most reasonable answer.
I hear everyone around me in conversations while I'm trying to eat my food. I mean this is the most I have eaten in a while. The last time I had a full meal was probably my breakfast before the Capitol Party.
"OMG!" Finnick shouts. I jumped up.
"What?!"
"Do you remember when we were-" I cut him off.
"You just shouted in my ear so you could bring up a memory?" I ask.
"Yes. Anyways, Do you remember when we were sitting on the dock and the turtle came and stole my hat?" He asks.
"That is such a lie. No one is going to believe that story ever. I walked away and the hat that Caspian and Maisy made you was gone so I think you just threw it under the dock." I say.
"Nope! I would never do that to their hat." He says.
"I think you would. I mean I would, that hat was ugly. If you didn't want it you could have just given it to me. I keep everything they make." I say patting his shoulder.
"I didn't! The wind knocked it off my head and the turtle came up and swam away with it!"
"Finn, you could have swam to get it back!"
"No I couldn't! He was swimming too fast!"
"Finn! You are like the fastest swimmer in 4!"
"I'm done listening to you two fight over a clearly fake story." Cody grumbles, standing up from his seat.
"See! Even Cody doesn't believe it!" I yell.
"Cody doesn't believe in anything!" Finn retorts.
"I'm done! Get someone who will believe your story." I say holding up my hands.
"I will!" Right after he says that, a PeaceKeeper walks into the room.
"We will arrive in 30 minutes." With that he walks out of the room and I jump.
"YAY!" I run into the room and quickly get changed into some leggings and a green crop top. I do everything I need to. I braid my hair into two dutch braids and put two small white bows at the bottom of them.
I pull out a few baby hairs in the front of my face and quickly run back out to the living room and see Finn and Cody sitting down on the couch. I run over and jump on Finn.
He makes a huff sound. I frown and sit on my knees, crossing my arms. "Are you saying I'm heavy?" I ask. I hear Cody snort.
"No you just knocked the wind out of me." He says quickly. I just frown and lay my head in Finnick's lap. A couple minutes later I feel the train coming to a stop. I quickly sit up and put on the closest shoes.
I run to the door waiting for it to open and when it does I run out of the door. I run through the square and when I make it to the gates of the Victors Village I finally slow down.
I hear heavy footsteps behind me and I turn to see Finn with his hands on his knees bent over. "You're out of shape buddy. Maybe you do need this training room." I say, smirking.
"You just ran like 2 miles and you're not dying?" He asks.
"Nope. I can't wait to see Casp and Maisy." I giggle, clapping my hands together. I walk into the Village with Finnick by my side. I make it to my door and before I can open it the door slams open and Maisy comes running at me.
"Cory!" She screams, running at me and throwing her arms around me. The force pushes me back a little. "I missed you! I have so much to tell you!" She smiles.
"I missed you too, but you can tell me all you want after I get into the door." I smile at her. She nods and asks Finnick if she can go on his shoulders.
I walk into the door and see Mags at the counter drinking coffee and reading a book. "Hey, Mags." I say kissing her forehead.
"Hello, Cordelia." She says, smiling.
"Thank you for watching them. I hope they weren't in any trouble."
"Not at all. They are both angels. You did a good job." She says, smiling up at me.
I smile back. "Where is Casp?" I ask.
"He got really nervous that you weren't going to come back in time for Maisy's birthday so he is out shopping for some things." I nod smiling.
He really needs to start putting some faith into me.
"He should be back soon. I also asked him to get some ingredients for our welcome home dinner." Mags says.
"You didn't have to do that." I say.
"It's the least I could do. I know what everyone here has gone through." She says with a sad smile. "Anyways, I'll get out of your hair. I need to go do some things around town and at my house."
"I think you should take a break. You do too much around here." Finnick says, walking up behind me with Maisy still on his shoulders.
"I just like giving back to the community. They don't have a lot." Mags smiles and walks up to Finn. He places a kiss on her head and she walks out of the door.
Me, Finn, and Maisy walk over to the couch where Maisy finally gets off his shoulder and sits on my lap. "Now that we are inside can I catch you up?" She asks.
"Of course."
"Ok! So we watched you go from district to district. Mags also taught me how to make a fish hook and she taught me how to help people. I want to be a helper like her!" She says, excitedly.
"You mean a doctor?" I ask.
"Yes! I wanna help people. Heal them. Make them feel better!" She says smiling.
"Well that is just amazing! I think you would be an amazing doctor!" I say smiling. Before she can reply I hear the front door opening. I turn around and see Caspian walk through the door with a couple of food bags and some things in a bag I can only tell are for Maisy's birthday.
Finnick gets up from the couch and says that he would take the bags. I guess he didn't notice that it was Finnick.
"Thanks Finn- Finnick?!" He asks, looking around. When he makes eye contact with me and quickly runs over and crushes me in a hug.
"Missed you too, bud." I say patting his back.
"I'm glad you got back in time." He says, smiling.
"Well I have to come back to my favorite people every once in a while." I say, smiling. "You have a lot to help me with tomorrow. I'm making a training room and when we are done making that we can start planning her birthday." I say the last part in a whisper.
"Ok! Can we go play in the ocean? We haven't played out there in a while." He asks.
"Of course. Go get your bathing suit on." He runs off the couch and upstairs. "Get your bathing suit on Finn!" I yell walking up the stairs with Maisy on my back. I hear Finnick running up the stairs behind us and I laugh because Finnick has the mind of a child so whenever we want to do something fun he always has to be a part of it.
I quickly changed Maisy into one of her many bathing suits and then I let her go downstairs with Caspian while I changed into one of my favorite bathing suits. It is a light green bikini with white flowers on it. It is one of my favorites because it was the first gift that Finnick got me for my birthday.
I ran downstairs to see Finnick, Maisy, and Casp waiting for me on the back porch. I grab us all some towels and we walk down to the private beach we have.
It's something all victors get. Since I didn't take the house that I was supposed to get, we technically have two private beaches to ourselves.
Finnick and I stay back as Casp and Maisy run down to the water. I set down the four towels I brought down and turned to Finn. "Last one there's a rotten fish!" I giggle. Without another second I turn and bolt toward the water.
"Not fair!" I hear Finn shout.
"All's fair in love and war!" I shout back at him. I don't turn around and when I make it to the water's edge I feel a force push me into the water. I swallowed like half of the ocean.
I come up from the water coughing and trying to catch my breath. "You bitch! I could have died!" I yell at Finnick.
"Don't be dramatic." He says brushing me off. Oh! Does he want to see something dramatic? When he turns around I jump on his back and put my arm around his neck being careful to not actually choke him. I use my body weight to fling us backwards and dunk him underwater.
When we come up he shakes his head like a wet dog. "It's on." He says with a smirk. I start laughing and try to run out of the ocean, but he catches up to me and puts his arms around me and spins us around. I'm still in his arms when the water is up to his waist and probably just under my chest.
He is carrying me bridal style, but soon enough he's tossing me out into the water. I swim up towards the surface and start laughing. Finnick swims over to me and puts his arms around my waist.
I smiled at him. "Thank you for making my day." I say.
"It's my pleasure to make your week a little less stressful when you make my days brighter just by being by my side." He says. Him and the cheesy romantic things he says to me.
"I love you." I whisper to him.
"I love you too." He whispers back to me.
"Hey! Can you guys help us build a sandcastle!" Maisy screams from the beach. I laugh and rest my head against Finnicks chest.
"We'll be right there!" Finn yells for me. "Whoever gets there last has to make dinner?"
I frown. "I thought Mags was doing that?"
"Have you ever eaten Mags' food?" He asks.
"Yeah... Nevermind." I say, laughing.
"Ready?"
"GO!" I yell. I started swimming. I would say I am a pretty good swimmer, but Finnick will always be the better swimmer. I didn't lose by a lot, maybe 1 foot. I don't really know. I expected to make dinner anyway. I mean Finnick makes some amazing soup.
I walk up to my favorite people and sit down next to them. "So what are we going to build?" I ask, smiling.
We spend the rest of the time trying to build the sandcastle and when I say we I mean Casp and Maisy did most of the work. Finnick and I mostly went to go get some water, dig a moat, and get seashells to decorate the castle. As long as they were happy with the end product I was completely fine with not doing anything.
We are all smiling enjoying the family time we don't get a lot anymore. The sun is setting and it's the most beautiful thing I have really ever seen. My favorite part of this day is watching Finnick be such a good role model for Casp and Maisy. They both look up to him and it is just adorable.
"Hey guys I think you should start getting back inside!" I hear a voice yell. I turn and see Isla and Mags standing on our porch.
"We'll be right in Mags!" I yell back to them. They turn back and go inside. "Add the finishing touches to your castle. We have dinner and you guys need to wash up. You guys are all sandy." I say.
They finish up with the castle and we start walking back inside. I tell Maisy and Casp to go upstairs and take a shower, but I will be taking a shower with Maisy just to know that she is actually washing her hair right.
The dinner is being made though. I guess losing wasn't that bad because I still don't have to make it. I will have to make it for the rest of the week though.
Everyone washes up and we sit at the table with all of the victors and obviously Maisy and Casp. We just talk like we would if there weren't any responsibilities we have. Everything in the world blocks out when you're with the people you love.
I guess if I spend the rest of my time on Earth with the people I love I might have a little bit more help than I thought.
◦╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╱◇╲╳╳╳╳╳╳╳◦
𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐈 𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐬 𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐬. 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬. 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐀 𝐋𝐎𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐈 𝐀𝐃𝐃! 𝐒𝐨𝐨𝐨. 𝐀𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐒𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐈𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐄𝐱𝐢𝐥𝐞. 𝐈 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞. 𝐉𝐨𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐨𝐫 𝐏𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐚? 𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫? 𝐏𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐞. 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐒𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐀𝐬 𝐀𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝟑𝟒𝟐𝟓 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬