TW: mentions of abuse, internalized transphobia, threats of murder
While his friends all spend time in one part of the lake, Polu takes the time to find a secluded spot. There, he disrobes down to his undergarments and cleans his clothes. He frowns at the tear in his top. Maybe Katara can teach me how to fix it.
Polu tosses his pants and top over the branch of a low-hanging tree. He dips his head under the surface of the water and takes care to wash his hair well. Over the last few months, he's noticed it grow longer, resulting in it needing more care. I wonder if Sokka would help me style it in a way that honors Mother's heritage.
At the thought of his mother, Polu winces. Reminders of the repetitive dream flash through his head.
Reminders of Tola sitting in the judge's seat. Reminders of her accusing Polu of abusing her. Reminders that, in his dream, she had set Polu equal to his cruel father.
Polu resurfaces, gasping for air. His chest hurts, and he remembers just how little quality sleep he'd gotten over the last several weeks.
He sloshes through the water and weakly bends the remaining droplets from his clothes. He pulls his top over his head and groans. It's still damp. Oh well, I'll just ask Katara later.
The prince shuffles back over to where his friends are, cursing himself for being too tired to bend properly anymore. As if on cue, he yawns.
"What happened with General Fong must've taxed the last of my stored energy," Polu says to himself. He finally reaches the others. "Hey, guys, when-"
He's cut off by the sound of music in the distance. Am I going crazy? Have I finally lost it?
Polu glances at each of his friends. "You're hearing that, right?"
Sokka nods in response.
It's then that Polu notices that Sokka's hair is down. He turns in the direction of the approaching music to hide the blush blooming across his cheeks.
A man's voice can be heard singing, "Don't fall in love with a traveling girl. She'll leave you broke and brokenhearted."
Splashing comes from behind Polu. He turns back around to find Sokka standing up after falling off his giant leaf. Polu snorts.
"Hey, river people!"
Katara tilts her head. "We're not river people," she objects.
"You're not?" The singing man asks. "Then what kind of people are you?"
"Just... people," Aang replies.
"Aren't we all, brother?" The man raises his hands and cheers.
Sokka stalks forward and points a finger at the man. "Who are you?"
"I'm Chong," the man replies.
"This is my wife, Lily." A woman in brown robes nods to the group.
"We're nomads. Happy to go wherever the wind takes us." The man strums his instrument.
That sounds familiar, Polu thinks. He yawns again.
"You guys are nomads?" Aang questions. "That's great! I'm a nomad!"
"Hey! Me too!" Chong exclaims.
"You just told us," Polu quips.
Chong raises a hand to the back of his head. "Oh." He stares at Sokka. "Nice underwear."
Polu frowns uncomfortably. Well, that's just fucking weird.
While Sokka changes back into his clothes, the nomads get cozy with the others. Polu ends up on Appa's head with the other woman traveling with the nomads. She introduces herself as Bo.
"Your hair is at a length that seems difficult to keep out of your face," Bo comments. "Do you have a way to manage it?"
Polu shakes his head. "I've been meaning to ask my friend since he's from a Water Tribe like my mother, but I keep forgetting."
Bo hums. "Do you mind if I try something?"
Polu tenses at the thought of the woman being so close to him. His eyes graze over her and, after a moment, deems her to not be a threat. "Sure," he smiles.
Bo pulls something from her bag and drags it along the sides of Polu's head.
Unwittingly, he leans into the touch. His eyes droop as he relaxes.
"Don't tilt so far," Bo giggles. "I can't work properly like this."
Polu jolts upright. "Oh, sorry." He flushes with embarrassment.
"It's alright," Bo hums. She continues her work, shaving the sides and back of his head. With what's left, she braids small bits of his hair until it all comes together; not a single hair remains out of place.
"All done," Bo sings. "Oh! Have this." She reaches back into her bag and pulls out a band to form a top knot.
Polu sits upright, "Where did you get this?"
Bo smiles and hands the band to the boy. "I have a friend who stopped in Ba Sing Se. She said her brother liked collecting them, but he had too many."
Polu stares at the familiar hairpiece in awe. I've never actually gotten to wear one of these before. They look like so much less of a hassle than that massive hairpiece women are meant to wear.
"I thought you might like it. It'll help keep your hair out of your face as it gets longer," Bo continues.
Polu leans forward and hugs the woman. "Thank you, Bo. Thank you so much." He stifles a yawn for fear that she'll take it the wrong way.
The woman smiles softly and returns the hug. "It's my pleasure, Polu."
"Hey, Sokka," Aang calls out from Appa's feet. "You should hear some of these stories. These guys have been everywhere."
"Well, not everywhere, little arrowhead," Chong disagrees. "But where we haven't been, we've heard about through stories and songs."
Aang grins at Sokka. "They said they'll take us to see a giant nightcrawler."
Polu looks at Bo. "You've seen a giant nightcrawler?"
Bo nods. "They're real pleasant if you know how to treat 'em. Kinda like a big baby." She taps Polu on his nose.
The teen is stunned for a moment, then giggles.
The man lying on the ground, Moku, chimes in, "On the way, there's a waterfall that creates a never-ending rainbow!"
"Wow, Bo," Polu murmurs in astonishment. "You really get to see some amazing things, huh?"
"We do!" Bo agrees. "My favorite thing is always meeting new people though. They always have unique stories to tell."
Sokka rolls his eyes. "Look, I hate to be the wet blanket here, but since Katara and Polu are busy, I guess it's up to me."
The two teens both stop their conversations to glare at him.
"We need to get to Omashu."
Polu shrinks in on himself. Bumi's in Omashu. He won't want to see me. What do I do? Aang needs to learn earthbending, and I can't be the one to teach him, but I don't want to risk my friends finding out how horrible I am if Bumi slips up.
"You alright, starlight?" Bo gently asks.
He flinches at the nickname. "Yeah." Polu nods, hoping his smile seems genuine. She reminds me so much of-
"Do I remind you of someone?" The question is innocent enough, but how in the world could she have guessed?
"How did you know?"
Bo smiles sadly. "The look on your face says it all. Is it your mom?"
"Yeah... you remind me so much of her before things went to shit." Polu's posture slumps as he recalls better memories of Tola. "There was a time when it felt like she and I could have a happy life."
"What happened?" Bo asks.
Polu glances down at Aang. "My father changed when I was four. After that, nobody could be happy."
Bo hugs the boy tightly. "All things happen for a reason, little man. Maybe that happened so you could use your experience to help others in similar situations."
Had anybody else said it, I'd probably be offended that they said such a thing. For some reason though, coming from Bo, it sounds like a good thing.
"Yeah, maybe," he finally replies.
"-It's as old as earthbending itself."
Polu tunes back into the conversation happening below just in time to hear Chong start singing.
"Two lovers, forbidden from one another."
Polu glances at Sokka.
"A war divides their people, and a mountain divides them apart."
Bo begins swaying to the tune. After a moment's hesitation, Polu joins her. His eyes droop at the calm rhythm of the song.
Sokka turns his attention up to Polu. I haven't seen him this happy in weeks.
"Built a path to be together." Chong mutters, "Yeah, I forget the next couple of lines, but then it goes: secret tunnel! Secret tunnel! Through the mountain! Secret, secret, secret, secret tunnel! Yeah."
Polu and Bo clap cheerfully.
"I think we'll stick to flying," Sokka harrumphs. "We've dealt with the Fire Nation before. We'll be fine."
Aang stands up. "Yeah, thanks for the help, but Appa hates going underground. And we need to do whatever makes Appa most comfortable."
Polu nods, then turns to Bo. "I guess this is goodbye, then," he frowns.
"Paths that meet once are bound to meet again," Bo recites. "This is more like goodbye for now." She holds her arms open for a hug.
The prince gladly accepts.
~~~~~
"Launch!" A firebender exclaims.
Polu manages to stop a few fireballs with his earthbending, but it's barely effective.
The four scream as they try to dodge the onslaught.
~~~~~
The group trudges past the nomads.
"Secret love cave," Sokka drawls. "Let's go."
Bo stands and hurries to join Polu at the back of the group. "I thought you could handle the Fire Nation?"
Polu laughs. "Normally we can, but we were surrounded. There was no way we were getting out of there in one piece."
"I see," Bo muses. "Well, that proves me right."
"About what?" Polu questions.
"What I said earlier," the woman smiles. "Paths that meet are bound to meet again."
"Labyrinth?!" Sokka shrieks.
Polu raises an eyebrow. "Huh?"
"I'm sure we'll figure it out," Chong grins.
The group starts on their way again.
"All you need to do is trust in love." Lily phrases her sentence as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. "According to the curse."
Sokka stops walking as he tries to process what the woman said. "Curse?!"
Polu snickers and nudges his friend as he passes him. "Oh, come on. You don't believe in curses, do you?" As soon as his face is out of Sokka's sight, Polu yawns.
Sokka glowers at Polu before following him.
A few long minutes later, the group finally arrives at the mouth of the cave.
"Hey, hey!" Chong exclaims. "We're here!"
"What exactly is this curse?" Sokka demands.
Chong doesn't reply for a moment as he tries to remember. "The curse says that only those that trust in love can make it through the caves."
Well I'm fucked, then. Externally, Polu maintains a straight face.
"Otherwise, you'll be trapped in them forever."
"And die," Lily adds cheerfully.
Polu reaches out for a hand, expecting it to be Bo's.
"You don't believe in curses, do you?" Sokka taunts Polu with the words he'd spoken to Sokka just minutes earlier.
The prince then realizes exactly whose hand he had grabbed. He pulls away and sticks his tongue out at his friend. "Very funny."
"Hey!" Chong blurts. "I just remembered the rest of the song." He steps forward and, in a deep pitch, sings, "And die."
"That's it! There's no way we're going through some cursed hole!" Sokka screeches.
Moku chimes in. "Hey! Someone's making a campfire."
Fear churns in Polu's gut. "That's not a campfire, Moku. That's the Fire Nation."
"They're tracking us," Sokka adds grimly.
Aang turns back to Chong. "So all you need to get through these caves is love?"
"That is correct, Master Arrowhead," Chong replies.
Aang glances at Katara. "We can make it."
From between Sokka and Bo, Polu speaks up. "Listen, kid. I know you're super optimistic, and I love you for that, but the last time I loved someone, I ended up with two new scars and shame on my name."
Sokka elbows his friend.
Polu shrugs with an innocent smile. "What can I say? I like joking about my trauma."
"We can make it," Aang assures his friend. "I know we can."
Sokka sighs. "Everyone into the hole."
Appa grumbles as the group walks into the mouth of the cave.
By the time anyone hears the rocks collapsing, it's too late.
Immediately, Appa is clawing at the boulders, desperately trying to escape.
Chong lights a torch so that everyone can see.
"It's okay, Appa," Katara soothes, "We'll be fine." She turns around to Polu. "You can get us out of here, right?"
"Uh-" Polu's mind races. How do I tell them I'm too sleep-deprived to even bend? I'm supposed to be this super-powerful earthbender, but I'm rendered useless without enough sleep. He yawns as he tries to think of a response.
"Polu?" Sokka questions.
"It's probably best we don't go out that way," the teen finally answers. "The Fire Nation closed us in; if we leave that way, they'll just attack us. We need to find a way out that doesn't lead us to them."
Please buy it, Polu pleads. Please, please buy it.
"That's smart, actually," Sokka acknowledges. "We just need a plan. You can take care of the rest."
Right. I can... take care of the rest. It's a miracle nobody's remembered that I should just be able to sense a way out of here.
"Chong, how long do those torches last?" Sokka turns around to question the nomad.
"About two hours each," the man responds.
Lily smiles. "And we have five torches, so that's ten hours!" She lights the rest of the torches.
"It doesn't work like that if they're all lit at the same time," Sokka groans.
"Oh, right."
Polu glances down at Bo.
The woman only chuckles at her friend's antics.
Sokka climbs up to Appa's saddle. "I'm gonna make a map to keep track of where we've been. Then we should be able to solve it like a maze and get through."
Bo pulls Polu down to her height. "Is he always like this?"
The boy snorts. "Yeah, pretty much."
~~~~~
After thirty minutes of walking, the group comes to another halt.
"Sokka, this is the tenth dead end you've led us to," Katara states.
"This doesn't make any sense," Sokka complains. "We already came through this way."
From the back of the group, Chong mutters, "We don't need a map. We just need love."
"Do you believe that, Bo?" Polu looks at the nomad next to him. "That we just need love?" His eyes droop a bit as his exhaustion catches up to him.
The woman grins softly. "I do. Love can do incredible things, you know. Lead you through a maze, get you out of trouble..." She glances at Sokka, then back at Polu. "It can even heal you."
Polu rolls his eyes affectionately. "The other two I can see, but I dunno about that last one, Bo."
Bo shrugs. "You'll see it someday. Trust me."
"There's something strange here," Sokka continues. "There's only one explanation: the tunnels are changing."
Everyone lets out a shriek as the mountain begins to rumble.
"The tunnels, they're a-changing!" Chong frets. "It must be the curse! I knew we shouldn't have come down here."
"Right," Sokka deadpans. "If only we'd listened to you."
Polu leaves Bo's side to walk next to Sokka. "I think I know what's changing the tunnels, but I don't know how to stop it."
"Everyone be quiet," Katara commands. "Listen."
In the distance, animalistic wailing and screeching can be heard.
"Wah!" Polu ducks as a wolf-bat makes a beeline for his head.
"A giant flying thing with teeth!" Chong exclaims.
"It's a wolf-bat!" One of the nomads shouts.
The creature takes back to the air, launching itself in every direction.
Sokka swings his torch at the animal but accidentally lets go. The lit torch lands at Appa's feet, causing the bison to go into a panicked stampede.
The bison runs back and forth, slamming into three different sections of the tunnel.
Polu can predict what's about to happen before anyone else. "Run!"
Sokka, who's frozen in the entryway to the middle tunnel, is in the most immediate danger. So, Polu launches himself at his friend and sends them both flying down the tunnel.
Moments later, they're blocked off from the rest of the group.
The pair roll over and over until, once again, they come to a stop with Polu on top of Sokka. "Are you okay?" Polu frantically checks his friend for any signs of injury.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Thanks for that, by the way," Sokka responds. His eyes... wow.
Polu clears his throat and falls to the side of Sokka. "Yeah, of course. I wasn't about to sit there and watch you get crushed by a boulder."
"I can't believe I didn't think of this before," Sokka moans. "Polu, you can sense your way out of here, right? With your seismic sensing, or whatever? Or you could bend a path out."
I don't think I could even move a pebble right now. "Yeah, sure. Let me see." Polu falls into his familiar bending stance and thrusts a fist in front of him, hoping to see movement from the tunnel in front of them.
Even the tiny stones at the bender's feet don't move for him.
"Sorry, Sok," Polu yawns. "I think I'm too tired." I didn't mean to admit that!
Worry etches itself onto Sokka's face. "You haven't been sleeping well lately. You were crying in your sleep last night, Polu. What's going on?"
The older sighs and slumps against the wall behind him. "Can we not talk about this right now, Sokka? I'd rather get out of these caves and make sure Aang and Katara are okay before I do any dream talk."
Sokka frowns. "All you ever do is worry about them. Let someone worry about you for once."
"You don't get it." Polu shakes his head and slides to the ground. "My entire purpose in life is to protect and help Aang. It's the whole reason I can bend water. It's my identity. If he gets hurt and I'm not there to help him, then I've failed."
Sokka huffs quietly and sits next to his friend. "Everyone is going to fail to accomplish something at some point. You can't expect to always be there for him; you told me that. One day you're going to get older and have families. What then?"
The prince drags a hand down his face as he yawns again. "Spirits, I know. I can't protect him forever, but I can at least get him through this war. If it takes sacrificing myself to make sure he can put an end to this thing, I'll do it."
"No!" Sokka's eyes widen. Without thinking, he reaches out to grasp one of Polu's hands. "You can't possibly expect to put his life before yours!"
"Sokka, he's the Avatar. If he dies and we have to wait more than a decade for the next one to be even remotely ready to end the war, what happens then? Who do you think the world will blame?"
The other boy is silent.
"Yeah. It's not ideal, but his life is more important than mine. My duty as his Advisor and his best friend is to keep him alive."
Sokka tightens his grip on Polu's hand. "Will you at least promise me to not instantly throw yourself to the wolf-bats trying to protect Aang?"
Polu meets Sokka's eyes and he sighs. "Sure. I promise I'll do my best to not dive headfirst into fights to save Aang."
"Thank you." Sokka chuckles and rubs his thumb along the back of Polu's hand. "You're probably my best friend. I know we've had our rough patches, but I don't think I could do this whole 'ending the war' thing without you."
Polu blushes. "Thanks," he murmurs.
"Seriously, though. What's going on with these dreams of yours?" Sokka frowns when Polu avoids eye contact. "Your quality of sleep has been so impacted that you can't bend anymore. I didn't know that was even possible!"
Polu sighs. "Can this please wait until we're out of these tunnels?"
"Polu, we really need to talk about-"
"Yeah, I know," Polu interrupts. "It's not about that, anymore."
Sokka's brows furrow. "Then why won't you say anything?"
The earthbender groans. "I may owe my earthbending to badger-moles, but I'm not too keen on being stuck in their home while they're here."
"Are they what keeps making the tunnels change?" Sokka's eyes go wide.
Polu nods. "That's what I was trying to tell you before I got charged by a wolf-bat."
Sokka snickers. "That was kinda funny, you have to admit."
Polu scoffs lightheartedly. "I don't have to admit to anything."
Without warning, the torch that Polu had rammed into the ground dies out. Above them, crystals light a path.
"Wow..." Polu murmurs. "I guess that's what they meant by 'trust in love'."
In the dim lighting of the gems in the ceiling, Sokka can just barely make out Polu's awestruck features. "What do you mean?"
"Think about it. If you had never been in these caves before, you'd bring a lot of torches, right?"
Sokka nods.
"Look where that got us."
The younger considers that statement. "What does that have to do with love?"
"If you love someone, you always find a way back to them, right?"
Sokka nods again.
"You have to have trust that it'll happen, though. You might not be reunited overnight, but if you trust them and yourself and use everything in your power, you'll find them eventually. If you have trust in your love, you won't need the torch. You'd know that you'd be reunited eventually anyway."
"Wow, that's... that's a lot deeper than I think it's meant to be."
Polu sputters incredulously before realizing Sokka is teasing him. "Oh, wow, okay. I see how it is."
Sokka stands and offers a hand to his friend. "Come on. Let's get out of here."
Polu grins and, together, they make their way out of the cave.
~~~~~
"Aang! Katara! Thank the Spirits you're okay!" Polu rushes to hug his friends the moment he and Sokka escape the cave.
"Polu! Sokka!" The pair are quick to return his hug.
"Where are the nomads?" Aang questions.
The prince glances around. "I don't know. I thought they were with you!"
On cue, a crash comes from behind them. The group turns back to the mountain to find a badger-mole dashing toward them.
"Bo!" Polu approaches the woman as soon as she slides to the ground. "You made it out!"
"We sure did, starlight." Bo adjusts one of the braids that had come loose from Polu's hair.
"Are you guys gonna come to Omashu with us?" Polu asks hopefully.
Bo smiles up at the boy she'd so quickly grown attached to. "No can do, kiddo."
Polu frowns. "We'll see each other again, though. Right?"
Bo hugs Polu tightly. "I'm sure we will."
The two pull apart. Bo waves goodbye as she walks away with the rest of her friends. "Goodbye, little man!"
"Bye, Bo! Stay safe!" Polu waves at the woman until she's out of sight. His hand slowly falls back to his side. A hand clamps down on Polu's shoulder, and he jumps. He turns around to find Sokka giving him a stern look.
The brunette jerks his head to a spot a bit away from the other two.
"Sokka?" Katara questions.
"I just have to talk to Polu for a minute. You two stay here," Sokka instructs.
Aang and Katara nod in understanding, so the two older boys walk a far enough distance so that they won't be heard.
Sokka sits with his legs dangling over the cliff. He pats the ground for Polu to do the same.
Once the prince is settled, he begins to twiddle his fingers anxiously.
Sokka frowns as he asks, "What's going on?"
Polu tenses. He stares out at the vast scenery instead of at his friend. "Like I keep telling you, it's nothing."
"Yeah, you keep saying that, but I'm not seeing any evidence of that being the case. You don't sleep well, but you sleep nearly all day and all night. You almost always wake up in a panic-"
Polu opens his mouth to object.
"-and don't try to tell me you don't. I've heard you trying to calm down."
The prince shivers at the glare he receives from Sokka.
"You've been pushing us away since we left the Northern Tribe, and you've been skipping meals again." Sokka takes a deep breath as he adds, "And don't forget there was that dream you had on our way to General Fong. You were scratching yourself until you bled, Polu. This isn't nothing. I hate seeing you do this to yourself. Please, just let me in."
Polu wraps his arms around his torso and squeezes, hoping to alleviate the nausea in his stomach. "Sokka, I- there's so much of it, and I don't want you to hate me."
"I'm not going to hate you," the younger reassures. "Unless you ate all my jerky. I might not forgive you for that." He offers a teasing smirk.
The earthbender laughs quietly. "No, I haven't eaten your jerky."
"Did you hurt Katara?"
Polu thinks about that. "...I don't think so. I mean, I know me repeating that 'this is all nothing' is annoying her, but-"
"You haven't hurt her. Trust me, you'd know," Sokka interrupts. "Whatever it is you have to say, you can trust it's not going to change my opinion of you."
Internally, Polu wonders just how much of that is true. "Sokka, I guarantee that you'll think me to be a monster if I tell you all this."
Sokka rests a hand on his friend's bouncing knee. "How about you let me be the judge of that?"
Polu sighs. "Alright. Don't say I didn't warn you."
The older boy takes a deep breath. "Sokka, I- I was horrible to my mother before I left. I lashed out at her for things Milan had done. I accused her of being the same as him.
"I accused her of being abusive toward me because Milan kept selling me to different men. I told her she'd ruined mine and Bumi's lives despite knowing she hadn't done anything to us."
He shudders as he imagines his mother's pained expression. "She couldn't help or protect us, because then Milan would do worse things to her. He was constantly threatening to have her killed or sent off to a place where they'd do horrible things to her."
Polu's eyes burn as tears threaten to spill. His chest screams in pain as though someone is sitting on him. His throat tightens from fighting back sobs, causing his voice to be deeper than normal.
Sokka listens, trying to sort out his thoughts as best he can.
"I never laid hands on her, but I was awful to her. I was abusive towards my mother. Sokka, I-" Polu's watery eyes finally meet his friend's. "I'm a monster."
The boy's voice cracks and a single, fat tear rolls down his cheek. "I'm a monster. I didn't want you to know, because I didn't want to be alone, but I feel so bad for hiding it from you. I'm so sorry, I-"
Sokka pulls his friend int a hug. He squeezes tightly as though to remind Polu that he's not alone.
"Why? Why are you-" the prince hiccups. "Why are you hugging me? You should hate me. All of you should hate me!" Polu weakly pounds on Sokka's back. "Why don't you hate me?"
"You couldn't safely take out your anger on the person who deserved it."
Sokka's voice vibrates through Polu's bones, giving him a calming sensation.
"Your mother surely knew that. You shared the same abuser, after all. I'm sure it hurt to hear, but I doubt she blamed you. It's a mom's instinct to do what they can for their kids."
Sokka pulls out of the hug. He searches Polu's eyes to find murky despair lurking in them. He sighs.
"If I had to take a guess, I'd say the words almost bounced off of her. She knew you needed someone to yell at, and she was the only safe person you could do that with."
"But I treated Bumi badly, too. I treated him like an adult when he was just a little kid," Polu objects.
Sokka becomes insistent. "But did you lash out at him? Did you yell at him like you did at your mom?"
"No, but-"
"Did you mistreat him? Did you lay hands on him?"
Polu recoils in horror. "No, never!"
Sokka lets out a huff. A small smile tugs at his lips. "Did you do your best to protect your brother from your father's abuse?"
"Of course," Polu scoffs. "I'm not-" he stops.
"Not what?" Sokka pushes. "Say it."
"I wouldn't ever subject a child to something like that," Polu corrects.
Sokka sighs. "You're not a monster, Polu. You're not a villain; you're not a bad person. You're damaged beyond comprehension, and you were just trying to find a way to process what you'd gone through."
Polu's tears start up again as his friend's words sink in.
"Is that what your nightmares were about? Were you reliving what you'd said to them?" Sokka tries to inquire as gently as possible.
"Some of them," Polu admits. "I- I also..." He trails off.
"Polu, I can't imagine how hard it is, but it's for your own good if you have someone to help shoulder your burden. I'm here to help," Sokka soothes.
The prince flushes red and ducks his face to hide his cheeks. "I also see Aang. And Katara, and my cousin Yu. I see Princess Yue and I see-"
His eyes widen fearfully as he remembers Dream Sokka's words.
"Of all the people who could've fallen in love with me, it had to be a trans man."
Sokka prods, "Who else?"
"You," Polu mutters.
"Who?"
"You!" Polu blurts. "I see Yue, Yu, and all my friends. Including you."
Sokka's heart breaks at the hopelessness in Polu's voice. "And what is it we say?"
Polu curls into himself. "Aang says I'm bad at my job as his Advisor. That, if I were better, we wouldn't have half the problems we do."
He shudders. "He also accuses me of being the reason the airbenders are all dead. He says that, if I had convinced him to stay, they'd all be alive."
Sokka shakes his head. "That just means you two would've died with them."
"But you don't know-"
"Neither do you," Sokka interrupts. "You don't know what could've happened. And are you messy as an Advisor? Sure."
Polu winces at that.
Sokka's voice softens. "But you have nobody to reference. You are the only one of your kind. And it's not like Aang is a perfect Avatar. You're doing your best; that's what's important."
The younger boy grasps one of Polu's hands in his own. "What else?"
"Katara says- she says it's hard dealing with my 'emotional outbursts'." Polu's face shimmers with shame as he turns away from his friend.
Sokka laughs lightly. "She loves helping people. And like I said: if she had a problem with you, she'd have voiced it by now. She's been supportive of you since the beginning. She really cares about you."
Polu's eyes meet Sokka's. "You think so?" He asks hopefully.
"I do," Sokka grins. "What did Yu say to you?"
"She-" Polu's voice quivers nervously "She says that I kill firebenders as ruthlessly as they kill everyone else and that I really am Milan's son."
Sokka sighs. "Firstly, it is kinda their fault if they were on a war boat and couldn't swim."
Polu snorts quietly.
"Secondly, both you and Aang did some heavy damage out there. I think part of it has to do with the anger the Spirits felt."
The prince considers that then nods slowly. "I suppose. But I still killed them!"
"You were defending innocent people. Casualties happen, but you should know that most of the firebenders either escaped or were taken hostage. Most didn't die, despite what you did."
"Really?" Polu's spirits seem to lift at the thought that he isn't a mass murderer.
"Really," Sokka assures.
Polu's smile only lasts a moment. "As for Yue... I just didn't treat her very kindly."
I can't tell him that it's because we both liked Sokka, but she was the one who got his affection. That's out of the question.
"Huh? I didn't even notice," Sokka admits. "I thought you got along well."
Polu's shoulders slump. "We did at first, but- I don't know. I just grew more hostile towards her. And obviously, I feel really bad because she didn't deserve that and now she's-"
Polu's eyes meet Sokka's, and he notes the pain swimming in the blue irises.
"Gone," he finishes.
Sokka's demeanor shifts a bit, and Polu wonders if he's finally said enough to make his friend see that the prince really is a monster.
"Knowing her, she'd forgive you," Sokka finally says. "Even if you weren't kind to her, you didn't go out of your way to harm her. I'm sure she'd try to work things out."
Polu feels shame take hold of his heart. The fact that he admitted to disliking a dead girl is overshadowed by the fact that Sokka was right. She was benevolent and would've done what she could to ease tensions between them.
"Yeah, you're right. I just- I feel so bad. I didn't have a chance to apologize by the time I realized how fucked up it was of me. I guess that's why I saw her in my nightmares."
Sokka nods solemnly. "And me? What did I say to you?"
That you were disgusted by a trans man falling for you, Polu remembers.
"Are you sure you want to know?" The prince asks.
Sokka freezes. "How bad is it?"
"...Bad," Polu responds.
"Just tell me. Like I said," Sokka smiles, "I want to help you."
Polu takes a deep breath. "If you say so."
He stares down at his hands, anxiety coursing through him. "You said that I deserved to be sold to Azulon. You said you wished they'd killed me instead of letting me go. That the world would be better off if I'd died back then."
Sokka's eyes nearly pop out of his skull and his heart stops beating for a moment. "I- I said...?"
Polu shrinks into himself. "I know you apologized for what you said at the nunnery, but I guess a part of me still lingers on it."
"And you've been hearing this for weeks?" Sokka's voice cracks.
"Every time I fall asleep," Polu admits.
"Spirits," Sokka mutters. "Polu, I'm so so sorry. You did not deserve that, and there will never be a time when I wish you'd died that day. My life, and the world itself, is better with you alive. In this moment, in this spot. Everything is better with you here."
Again, Polu turns away to hide his blushing face. "You don't have to lie, Sokka."
"But I'm not lying," the brunette insists. He reaches forward and grasps both of Polu's hands. "I'm being honest. Every day, you teach me something new. You change my world view in some way. You make me better."
And somehow, Polu can sense the sincerity in Sokka's voice. Maybe it's through the lingering abilities of his seismic sensing, or maybe it's the look in Sokka's eyes, but Polu knows.
"Thank you," he whispers. "For everything."
Sokka nods and a grin stretches across his face. "Of course. We're in this together."
A few long beats of silence pass before Sokka asks, "Do you want to tell me about the recent nightmare?"
Polu shakes his head. "I think I've shared enough for today. That's got to be a lot to process for you."
The teen yawns. "Besides, I'm taxed."
Sokka chuckles when, a few seconds later, Polu slumps against him. It's clear that he's already asleep. The younger boy awkwardly pulls Polu into his arms and stands. He heads over to Aang and Katara, who stare at something in the distance.
"Hey, guys, what-"
In front of the group lies Omashu, covered in Fire Nation flags.
"Oh, shit."
Thank you for 3k! (And sorry about the month between updates!)