"Enough risking our lives for a little girl who's gone! Enough living next to a barn full of things that are trying to kill us! Enough. Rick, it ain't like it was before! Now is y'all want to live, if you want to survive, you got to fight for it! I'm taking about fighting right here, right now." Shane finishes his speech by running to the barn door, breaking the locks off and banging on the door for the dead to stumble out.
That's when my mind goes blank, falling onto the ground beside Carl and Lori. I hear Rick desperately calling out,
"Don't do it!" Glenn yells nervously with even less control on the situation than Rick.
Maggie and her dad sobbing, no one's listening. I look up at Lori, who is pushing Carl behind her so he cant see and squeezing Daniella's hand so tightly. My eyes shut before the colour and cover my ears with my hands trying to zone everything out on my own. Only when I close my eyes do the flashbacks start again, my friends, family and everything I had that I didn't know I had until it's gone. Blinking my eyes open it's blurred shouting, guns, the dead now starting to pill out the barn towards us.
The blonde and Daryl are the first to join in with Shane, then the coloured man.
"Maggie," Glenn asks,
She nods, "It's ok," he runs in to help. Shane shoots one of bad people Rick was holding so he lets go, stepping back in front of his family.
I open my teary ears when the muffled gunshots turned to silence, it's over. About 30 people on the ground, dead, dead, dead.
behind me was footsteps and I quickly jump round at the image of one of those bad things from the barn creeping up behind me. Instead, was a man, old man, age of Maggie's dad or something. The confusion and disappointment on his face when he stood there.
There's shuffling in the barn once again, quiet growl, only one. The suspension rising, when the girl comes out the barn no one shoots or even raises their gun, Shane lowered his.
"Older than you, short brown hair, rainbow shirt"
I quote Daryl in my head, the kid they're been looking for for weeks.
Her mother, the one Maggie said was Carol, runs from the back of the group to the front,
"Sophia! Sophia..." She reaches out when Daryl grabs her holding her, falling to the ground, "Sophia..." She cries, Carl sobbed into his mum's arms who looks just as shocked, gripping onto him, holding Daniella on her other side as she sobbed over her shoulder.
The kid makes her way through the bodies growling, no one's moving, not even Shane.
"Don't watch," Lori mumbles into Carl's hair then kissing Dani's hair, I looked at her through teary eyes and shaky bottom lip. She noticed me and waved her hand for me to come over so I shuffled over through the dirty, dusty path we were sat on.
Everyone sobbing, now waiting for this final shot. A kid they've been searching for for weeks, her mother there with her hopes of finding her bittersweetly in front of her. So unfair, although the dark part of my mind knows this will happen to everyone eventually it's still unfair. I wish I had my mummy here to comfort me, Lori's alright and stuff but it's not the same, I want the feeling Carl and Dani have right now. The warm and safe feeling of being in only your mum's arms, or dad's.
Sophia's mother and the Greene family's crying hurts, watching someone you loved shot in front of you, your family.
Carol pushes herself away from Daryl and ran back to the RV, I ran back to the house. Lori tried to pull me back into a hug but I shrugged her away.
My ducky stuffed animal out of my backpack and head to one of the trees next to the house and climb until the ground is a blur. I need glasses badly so blurriness probably ain't that high, unfortunately. Trying to calm my heartbeat by breathing didn't work and I cried into my hands, I want my mummy and daddy. I only have one picture, one picture of my family out of the hundreds of albums and scrapbook's and boxes my mummy made through out her life.
"We've been out combing these woods looking for her and she was in there all along? You knew," Shane followed Hershel and his family up to their house, he's the last voice I want to hear, it's stupid and annoying and always anger. I grin when Maggie slaps him, he needs to be humbled desperately,
"I mean it, off my land," Hershel says. My brows furrow, thinking about that for a second.
Hershel and his family and Rick and his family are two separate groups, I'm not neither or both.
Where would I go? Back on the road? My stomach twists at the thought. I don't wanna be alone again I like it here, getting used to the people and surroundings of this place I don't wanna go. I also don't wanna lose anyone, Maggie and Daniella are starting to be my friends I don't wanna lose one or the other.
"That son of a bitch, he knew," Shane points to where Hershel was just standing,
"Language," I mutter, only audible to myself and the squirrels or birds living in this tree.
"He didn't know. He's not like that. He opened his home to us." Rick says,
"Put us all in danger. Man, he kept a barnful of walkers."
I thought coming here was a good idea, new people, new start, new family. But maybe it's not like I thought, maybe being alone wasn't as bad as I thought,
"You're just as delusional as that guy," Shane scoffs, "handling it, huh?" Picking up his daughter, who had waddled out the house to the commotion, and walked away from the last word.
Mia was confused to why she was being carried away, dropping her sippy cup, Rick picked it up but didn't give it back. Shane going to his tent and that meant Mia had to go with so he wasn't alone.
I'm getting hungry, being bored makes you hungry. Maybe I haven't eaten today because I was too busy with barns and shouting people.
"Hey," someone says to me as my foot touches the grass,
"Carl?" I look at him confused since I didn't think he really liked me. I continued walking to find an apple or something, we're on a farm they gotta have farm-y things like that here, right?
"There's a funeral for Sophia and the others," he informs me. I saw a bucket of apple and wriggled my eyebrows at them, the sun was reflecting over the sun and were washed in clean water.
I bite into it, it was by the chicken coops. Very refreshing but I don't like when stuff gets stuck in my teeth. I huff, wanting to abandon the apple but I also don't like wasting. I notice Carl staring at me for a reply so I nod my head.
The funeral was nice and nicely timed with the sun setting. It's the only one I've been to, apart from my daddy's daddy, I never met him nor have a met Sophia. I didn't know what to do because I didn't cry, I don't know any of these people enough for it. Everyone's there to pay their respects to the ones they lost, Hershel wore a suit, it was ok apart from Carol wasn't here, did Carl not tell her? It was his job.
T-Dog, Rick and the blonde girl go to the pile up bodies that were unfamiliar to them,
"Help?" I ask when they start lifting them into the truck, which made me shiver, one of the things eyes opened and looking at me.
"You can help us count how many trips we might need to take," The blonde says, trying to think of something I could do. She must know what it feels like to be excluded or the 'odd man out' from the group because T-Dog and Rick kinda just ignored me.
"I can do that!" I half smile and count how many they loaded up an how many there still are,
"five," I look at them and T-Dog nods and I start to wonder off again, "Dani," I whisper when I see her and sprint, wanting to see how she is.
"I'm fine, I've never seen Shane like that," she mumbles,
"How long you known 'im?" I furrow my brows, Rick and Shane must be close since they call each other 'brother'.
"Since before I was born, him and my dad knew each other in high school. They're lucky to have such a close relationship after everything, Y'know?" She look at me before she frowns, I've never had a friend longer than a year.
"Do you ever feel like you don't fit in?" I muttered, I don't know why I thought I got the timing right on that.
"Sometimes? Why?" She was still looking at me, eye contact scares me the way they just staring into your soul waiting for you to respond.
"I don't know, I can't really help so people don't need me, I need them."
She pulls me into a hug, "Aw, of course we need you,"
I didn't hug back, I only hug back when I'm the one hugging you. She just wrapped her arms around me and I stared into the distance. It's not just here I don't fit in, it's always and everywhere but I didn't really wanna get into it right now. It's a lot of talking, explaining and thinking which I'm not skilled in.
I kinda got saved when I notice Rick loading his gun and Glenn said bye to Maggie. going to look for Hershel I'm guessing because he went off after what happened at the barn,
Daniella hugs her dad, "Please, be safe."
Rick puts his hand on her head messing her hair up lightly, "You ready?" Rick asks Glenn when he gets to the car.
"Yeah," he says but something is on this mind, you can see it on his face that he's overthinking something.
"Dad," Dani says sternly after not getting a proper reply, her dad steps into the car as well as Glenn,
"I will," He answers, almost like a promise, turning on the engine.
Beth was in some state of shock, she wasn't moving but her eyes were open and burning up, reminding me of that bad person from the truck. Lori comes into the door way then back out, looking out the window,
"Her hearts racing, she's burning up. We need Hershel. He'll know what to do." Andrea says to her holding her arms.
"Would you look in on Carl and Danielle for me?" Lori asks.
Daniella and Carl were outside with Mia but I chose to stay inside, laying back on this chair in the corner of the room, sitting on my hands and kicking my feet.
"Of course," Andrea looks at her confused but agrees and Lori leaves. I watch her out the window, jogging up to where Daryl's moved too.
Why'd he move away? That's something I'll investigate later.
I might have joined the three outside. Only because all they were doing inside was talking 'adult talk' and watching over Beth like a hawk. There was nothing for me to do, once again.
I go outside holding one of my books, maybe I'd start reading it now while everything's seems to be quieting down.
"What's that?" Carl asks,
"A book?" I look at him weird,
"No— I mean yeah, but what book?"
"Hunger Games,"
"Cool, what's it about?" He walks next to me, looking over my shoulder to scan the page I opened it too.
"It's about the movie, I don't know." I look at his sister who's seems amused or something, it's not funny,
"you've never seen The Hunger Games?" I take a step away from him to look at him, I thought everyone's watched it.
"No, is it good?" Carl shrugs, not knowing what the big deal is.
"Y'know what, when all this is over, you're watching it with me."
"Deal," he puts his hand out, I don't like hand shakes I think they're very formal and 'middle aged business man'.
"Deal," unless it's a handshake you make with friends, if that's a real thing, I've never had a friend to make one with but I see it shows.
It's been hours since Rick and Glenn left to find Hershel and I can sense Dani getting worried although Carl is fine, telling her that he can survive anything. Apparently their dad got shot at work and went into a coma, when the bombs went off they thought he was dead but they found him. Weird flex but ok... I'm just bitter because they both survive being shot. Daniella survive five allergic reactions and two broken bones.
"Pass me the water, please," I say to Carl after he pours himself a glass, T-Dog next to him taking a sip off his own water.
"They should've been back by now." Andrea says to Shane behind her as they walk in,
"Yeah. They just got holed up somewhere," he rubs his hands together to warm up from the cold night air outside, "We'll head out first thing in the morning." The water here tastes weird, like it has a few grains of salt in it or something, bottled water is real good.
Shane sits at the head of the table, his daughter next to him, she reaches up and takes one of the bean sprouts out the bowl and tastes it.
"No," she sticks her tongue out not liking it, putting it on her dad's plate who grabbed a hand full of them for himself.
He smiles and picks her up putting her on his knee, tickling her lightly so she doesn't knock something over by accident.
"Carl, I want you to keep your head up, ok?" Shane says before kissing his daughter on the head, "Your old man, he's the toughest son of
a—"
"No cussing in the house." Patricia cuts him off.
"Sorry." Shane grins, lifting Mia back up onto her own seat.
"Lori, dinner." Carol calls, I like Carol,
"She's not in there," Maggie turned round in her seat.
"Where is she?" A man asks her and everyone looks at Maggie who looks just as confused as everyone else.
"Daniella, when was the last time you saw your mom?" Shane puts his elbows on the table leaning closer,
"This afternoon?"
"She was worried about Rick, asked me to look in on them," Andrea helps,
The siblings look at each other trying to figure it out themselves but they really haven't seen her since this afternoon she didn't tell them anything.
Rick, Glenn and Hershel still not back either. Everyone gets up out their seats going to look for Lori to see if she's still on the property somewhere,
Andrea jogs back to grab Mia since she gets in trouble whenever she's alone. She wasn't alone, I was there... I'm hungry. Lori obviously went to look for Rick, that's why she asked for Andrea to look in and none of them are back.
They all wait outside for Carol to run up Daryl to see if he knows anything.
Carl comes running back into the house to the living room, I place the fork back to the place gently for it to not make any clanking-scraping sound. Daniella kneels onto the ground next to him hugging him. I go to the window when I see lights shining through,
"Shane's going," I tell.
"See, Shane will find mom and bring her back," she kisses Carls forehead and plays with his hair to calm him down which worked. I know that works.
Meanwhile, I'm sitting on the couch I slept on last night looking at the tv,
"do you think the tv still works?" They both look up at me slowly,
"Try it,"
I pick up the remote and press the on button which it flashes to a grey colour before switching to a random show from the 90's or further back.
"What you wanna watch?" I giggle, I haven't seen a working screen in months it also happens to distract the two from both parents being away tonight.
The shows that come up are popular shows in the 2000's.
"Dora the explorer," Carl points out,
"Carl wants to watch Dora the explorer," Dani teases, nudges his shoulder and I laugh,
"Malcolm in the middle?" I suggest.
An episode and a half later, Shane's car pulls up and Dani runs out. Carl, who had fallen asleep on her shoulder, falls onto the couch making him jolt awake. I pause the show and run after them reluctantly. thankfully Lori steps out,
"Oh my God, are you alright? What happened?" Andrea says, Dani runs past her wrapping her arms around her mum who strokes her hair,
"I was in an accident. I'm fine, I'm fine," She pushed Shane away who was getting in the way of Lori hugging her daughter back,
"I really am. Where's Rick?" Shane walks away and Daniella looks at him, she mad, very very.
"They're not back?" Lori's voice drops, "where are they?" She demands, looking at Shane for an explanation when he sighs avoiding eye contact,
"Look, I had to get you back here."
"You asshole," Lori pushes him and was grabbing his shirt.
"Lori."
"He's my husband." She shouts,
"I will go after him." He raises his voice so she would listen but she didn't listen.
Im not dumb enough to not notice Shane's destructive behaviour. He doesn't seem to notice anyone else's safety but Lori's and I think Daniella knows that too. She doesn't seem to be a fan, I think it's her brother's love for Shane that stops her from humbling him every time he's around.
"I gotta—I gotta look after you. I gotta make sure the baby's all right, ok?" Shane sighs, I choked on air.
"You're having a baby?" Carl comes round from behind Shane and everyone starts looking around to see who else knows about this, "why didn't you tell me?"
He shakes his head annoyed that he was one of the few that didn't know.
"I—I"
"Come on, Let's make sure you're all right," Dale extends his arm out making a gesture for her to come with him, Andrea joining while Carl stands there with Daniella behind him, her hands on his shoulders trying to figure out how and when, maybe also who and why.
Maggie goes back upstairs to sit with Beth and I go with since Lori is talking with her kids downstairs and the only other two people I know well enough to be around is gone.
"Where's Glenn?" I whisper,
"I don't know, he'll be back soon though. I'm sure, he always comes back." Maggie says with a smile, feels more like she's convincing herself than me. Not sure if that makes me feel better or worse, maybe the same.
"Can I watch tv?" I look at the door to Beth's room, I don't know the next chance I'll have to watch tv and I really liked the show.
"Tv? Of course you can sweetie," she smiles happy to see kids being kids.
I smile and run down stairs, holding onto the railing as I do so and practically dive onto the empty couch, grinning wide as I turn the show on having the whole downstairs to myself.
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pls check out my other twd fanfic on my profile, haunted days! I've just started it and I rlly like it :)
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