"Princess...."
I think he heard my movements from downstairs and came down to look for me. His face was angry and I could see the anger and rage in his eyes. Seemed like he didn't approve of it.
"Why are you drinking?"
He glared at me and I felt scared as he spoke to me in a harsh voice.
"You aren't allowed to do anything without me. I told you to stay there in this room and here you are trying to escape. You don't listen to me, do you???"
I was angry at him. My head ached so bad and I felt like I was dizzy.
"Shut the fuck up!!!"
I screamed. I almost drank.
"You are the one..... Yes, you! You! Y...you are the one who makes me d...doing this."
I went to him and pointed my finger at his chest.
"D...do you want t...to see me die?" I laugh.
He was startled and didn't answer me; he didn't say a single word. He just started at me and I was scared of him. He said nothing, but his presence filled me with fear. He seemed so threatening and it seemed so dangerous to make him mad. I could feel it in my bones, he would hurt me at any time. I didn't want to make him mad, but I felt I wanted to speak. I almost lost my mind because of alcohol. So I talked without fear and without thinking
"Am I a joke... joke to you?"
I was going to fall. But I kept my balance.
"Yes. You are a joke to me. And I will prove it. I will prove to you that you are nothing but a joke. "
He said to me, but he said it in such a sweet voice. He smiled when he spoke to me and he seemed so charming and so kind. He looked me directly in the eyes when he said this and his eyes seemed almost like they were glowing, like they were full of a dangerous anger. His words might just sound like a joke to me, but there was something about him that made his words seem dangerously frightening.
"D... don't look at me like this!! I... I'm sick of being scared of you!" I pushed him away and walked away. Then I cried. "D...do you want to see me suffering? W... What did I do? Y...you are almost ruining me". I went to him and fell onto his arm.
He caught me and he smiled. He hugged me close and he seemed kinder and nicer than he had before. I was crying and he kept hugging me closely and he started to pet my hair for a few minutes.
"It's okay, my little bird." He said gently. The anger and the bitterness seemed to have disappeared and his voice sounded so sweet and kind.
"It's okay... Everything is okay..."
I push him away.
"Nope... No! Not okay... It's not okay... I'm not okay..." I cried again.
"Do you know... D...do you know this... my heart? It...it is hurting s...so much... W...why are you hurting me?"
He didn't reply to this but he continued to hug me. His hug almost felt like a warm and soothing blanket that was wrapping me up. I cried into his chest and I still feel scared. But I also felt safe and comforted, and it seemed like he was a safe shelter for me. he was somebody that I could rely on. I felt conflicted; the man was so terrifying but his hug made me feel so safe. He was a man of two completely opposite sides, and I was terrified of his cruel side but I was comforted by his kindness.
"W....why you are d...doing this to me... Why???" I sniffed. "Y...you know... I... I love you" He was surprised.
"B...but b...but....."
My words surprised him a lot and he pulled away and looked at me with so much surprise in his eyes. He smiled at me, but I could see the shock and the surprise in his eyes. He was so surprised by what I said and he looked at me as I was saying these things. I felt scared because I was not sure how he would react.
"You love me?" He smiled and he continued to look at me with wide eyes. He seemed to be processing the fact that I said that I love him.
"I... I d...don't know... But but my heart... This... It's beating always when y...you look at me... yes I like... I like it when you kiss me... touch me...But... But I also hate you..."
By this fact. He seemed to be enjoying my conflicted feelings, and he liked seeing how confused I was. I was conflicted right now; I was confused because he was a good man sometimes, and other times he was a cruel and manipulative man. It was confusing when somebody treated you like this; when they switched between two completely opposite personalities so quickly.
"So you love me, but you hate me?" He asked, and he seemed to think it was funny. He laughed while he asked this.
*Yeess... I hate you... I hate you s...so much... But... Don't care about me... If...if you like to hurt me just only hurt me..."
I drink another glass in one sip.
"But when... When you protect me and take care of me... I... I'm confused... I... I was like... Should I love him or hate him?" I pouted at him. "You are so bad mm mm.."
He chuckled at this but his voice and his smile sounded so kind and genuine. It was scary how good his fake smile and fake voice were; it almost sounded so genuine. He smiled at me and his smile was so charming and loving. He held me close.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for being cruel to you."
He said this in a soft voice, which surprised me to hear as his voice was usually harsh and cruel. "Please, forgive me."
"Sorry??? Do you... Do you know how...how much pain I stuck here?" I smirked and pointed to my chest. *DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH PAIN I BEAR INSIDE ME???" I screamed at him with teary eyes and got the alcohol bottle in my hand.
I yelled at him and he got really mad, but then his rage disappeared as quickly as it came. I saw him smile again, his voice sounded sweet and his smile looked so kind and sweet.
"I'm sorry, my little bird. I'm sorry, please forgive me.* He hugged me tightly. I pushed him away. Then I sat on the floor and cried again
"I...I don't deserve this... Y..you know, I'm scared of the little noise of a dog barks as well. I'm depressed after all... I...I miss myself when I was happy... You... You are so bad... H... How much should I cry for you?"
He looked at me with so much pity in his eyes and his voice sounded like it was brimming with compassion. He hugged me and stroked my hair. He told me that he was so sorry: he was sorry that he had put me through all of this. I know he didn't want to see me like this again. "Please, forgive me, my princess." He said again and again and his speech sounded sincere and worried.
"You said me you... You love me... But noo noo you are a liar... I'm just a toy for you..." I took another sip of alcohol. "Am I just a toy?"
His smile disappeared when I said this. That seemed to hurt him greatly. He looked deeply hurt and upset. He glared at me and his hands were shaking. I didn't want to see him upset. But...
"I... I love you." He said to me with a cracking voice. I laughed at him.
"That man... That man Eric said he loves me... He told me to come to him... But I didn't why? I was loyal to you... But... But you still hurt me... Mmm... My heart is in pain."
My words hurt him. My words have wounded him because he was a sensitive man. He had an extremely soft heart but he was hurt and angered to try and suppress it. Maybe he was a soft man who was trying to be tough and that was why he seemed so angry. He hated seeing me suffer and he was hurt by my words; he was hurt because he wanted me to be happy. He wanted to protect me. But he was also the person that was hurting me and that was what made this whole situation so much more complicated.
The bottle I was handling slipped away and fell on the floor. It was broken.
"Fuck... My drink..."
"Anyway... Do you know how much my heart is hurting Jake?" I walked toward him. I stepped on the broken glasses and my leg was wounded and bleeding. I whimpered and was gonna fall.
"Ouch... Mmh"
I look at my bleeding leg. Then I smiled at it. He saw my leg and he quickly rushed over to me and held me on his arm.
"Oh, baby..."
He lifted me and put me gently on the couch and got some bandages. He sat on the floor in front of me and began wrapping my leg and he looked at me with so much compassion. He looked so sincere and kind like he truly cared about me.
"You are getting wounded because of me. This isn't right, and you don't deserve this. I'm so sorry for hurting you." he caressed my face and said.
"But... but it doesn't hurt as much as you did... Oh, my alcohol bottle has broken..."
I pouted at him.
"lemme take another..."
He sighed when I made this comment. He knew that what he had done to me was much worse than this wound on my leg. He felt guilty because he was the one who wounded my heart. He was the one who hurt me and he was the one who made me suffer so much pain and emotional discomfort. He knew that what he had done to me was so much worse than this.
"I don't like seeing you like this, my love..." He put away the bandages with teary eyes and got up and sat next to me.
"Is there anything I can do to ease your pain?"
I laughed at him.
"What pain, Jake...? This pain or this this pain?" I pointed out my finger on my wound and my chest and laughed again.
"Both... I don't like seeing you hurt in any way shape or form."
He looked sad when he spoke to me. It was clear that my pain hurt him and it pained him deeply since he was so sensitive. He hated seeing me hurt even though he was the one who was hurting me.
"What can I do to make you better and to heal your pain and discomfort?"
Seemed like, he wanted to heal me and make me feel better. I sighed and looked at him while holding his both cheeks with my hands.
"Y..you you can't do anything... Because this is my destiny as y...you said... I am just a toy in someone's life... I want to drink more... Lemme me take another bottle..."
I stood up and tried to take another one. But my leg was hurting when I stepped.
"Ouch.... this fking wound...mmh"
He watched I got up and got worried. He didn't want me to hurt myself anymore and he grabbed my arm to stop me from going to get another bottle.
"Please, don't do this to yourself."
He said with so much worry and concern on his face. He didn't want to see me hurt myself anymore and he didn't want to see me drinking.
"Please princess... don't drink, let's just sit down and talk about this..."
"But now... I'm addicted to the pain"
I sat down and pouted while holding his arm. He sighed at this.
"Pain can become addictive over time." He shook his head and he looked at me. "I am worried about you. You keep doing things that are harmful to yourself and you keep hurting yourself. It's like you don't care about your own life. You hurt yourself and you don't seem to care."
He was clearly so worried and upset that I didn't seem to value my own life. Tears kept coming into my eyes.
"Y...you also hurt me... Soo... So... What happens if do it myself though...
I smiled through the pain as I was going through a trauma. I was feeling dizzy though. I was drunk so much. I couldn't even stand up.
"I know my princess... and I'm so sorry for hurting you." His words were compassionate and his tone was sincere.
"I would rather you not hurt yourself. I want you to be happy. I want you to be healthy. I fucking love you princess" He said gently and I felt that he was speaking from his heart. I looked at him as he looked into my teary eyes with so much worry. My heart beat fast. I looked at his lips. I didn't know I felt something strange. I held his face with both my hands and kissed him deeply. He was surprised and blushed.
"Stop lying idiot..." I sighed and lay on the couch. "Y...you... You are such a lair." I told him with a low voice while closing my eyes. "I... I'm sleepy..."
I could say I caught him off guard when I kissed him. He was completely surprised and he didn't even know how to react. He didn't expect this and I have got him so dumbfounded that he didn't know what to say. He just started at me and his eyes and cheeks were slightly pink, perhaps he was embarrassed.
"B...baby... H...How am I lying?" He questioned me. "What am I lying about? I promise you that I will do anything and everything if it means making you happy."
"Lying? You! You like only hurt me!! Not to be happy and healthy. You...you want to see my tears and pain only...." I kept humming.
His face looked hurt by these words. He seemed sad when he looked down at me and he seemed like he was on the verge of crying. He looked like he would cry if I continued yelling at him. He was trying not to show any emotions because that would make him look weak, but it was clear that my accusations had broken him and crushed him.
"Those are terrible things to say..."
He said this in a shaky and quiet voice and he looked at me with such sadness in his eyes.
"Why would you say something like that when I'm trying to help you and love you so much?" I didn't say anything. I was asleep on the couch. He kept looking at me and caressing my hair. He had so many things to think tonight. He signed covered me with a blanket and kissed my forehead.
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"Hope you guys enjoyed☺️ Let's see what will happen in their lives with a next part🥰 Byeeeeeeeeeeee💗"