"You've touched me without even touching me."
- rupi kaur
~~~~
Tay
His body hovers above mine, his hands pressed onto my chest. A soft whimper escapes my lips as he lowers himself onto me, with only a thin layer of material separating us.
My hands slide up his sides, resting just below his ribs. His gaze moves from my belly button to his own hands and then to my neck and eyes. His expression seems filled with awe, compelling me to desire flipping him over and taking him right away. However, I manage to control myself.
He lowers his head gently and presses his lips to mine. I move my hand to the back of his head, pulling him closer. His hips grind against mine, causing me to become instantly aroused.
As he kisses me, his hands grip my neck firmly. His lips greedily devour mine. With each kiss, he grinds against me with increasing intensity, occasionally breaking away to catch his breath from the pleasure. "Oh, fuck," I groan, feeling my excitement surge.
"What's wrong?" he asks me.
I prop myself up on my forearms and shake my head. "Nothing," I assure him. "I just want to make sure you're comfortable before we continue."
His lips curl up into a smile as he
pushes me back down to the bed with
his hand, the dominance surprisingly
turning me on. "Teh," he breathes out against my lips. "I want you to mark me and I want you to do it now."
His words made me flip him down onto his back as a reflex, I wasn't to be played with right now. But as I look down to New, his eyes glisten with success because he knew that I couldn't resist taking charge.
My nerve endings tingled as he writhed on the bed, hips gently buckling.
I place my hand on the centre of his
chest and run my fingers down his
torso, his skin is rising in goosebumps
and he shudders continuously.
Looping my fingers into his black boxers and pulling them down his legs, New's eyes watching my every move. His member springs free and I instantly wrap my hand around it, pumping gently.
"Don't... Stop..." The words try to escape his mouth with desire.
I kissed him way down his chest, settling the length of his body against mine. His featherlight, short fingers dragged across my neck, as I sucked his nipples. He let out a moan. "Ohhh..."
And all I could think was... I need you.
BEEP BEEP BEEP!
I bolt upright in my king-sized bed, gasping for breath.
"Fuck! That felt real." I groaned, pulling the duvet away from me.
The details of the dream were fading, but the physical effects were still lingering. My nerves were quivering, my skin was sweaty, and my heart was pounding. I looked down at my hard-on. I had to take care of junior Tawan first. It wasn't my fucking Morning wood. It was that wet dream. I haven't slept with anyone for a long time... Maybe that's the reason.
Damn, you're screwed, Tawan.
I swiftly make my way to the bathroom to address this situation. After taking care of myself, I head downstairs for breakfast and am met by my father. He is leisurely sipping his coffee while reading a newspaper.
"I trust you have everything prepared?" he inquires, setting his coffee cup on the table.
"Good morning to you too." I said rolling my eyes.
He takes a deep breath, retrieves his cup, and takes another sip. "Please, have a seat," he says, pointing to the chair opposite him.
I offer him a glare but comply, sitting down. "What do you want?" I ask, a tinge of annoyance in my tone.
He exhales slowly and takes another sip of his coffee before responding.
"See, Tawan. Don't mess this up. I'm not going to clean up after you! You do know how important it is for you to marry that guy!"
"Surprise, Dad! Enlightenment me why it's important to marry him? Because I have no fucking idea!" I raised my voice.
He set his coffee down and looked at me seriously. "In order for you to secure the throne, you must be married."
"I am aware of the stipulation in the contract, Father. However, it does not specify who I must marry."
"Please do not test my patience so early in the morning, Tawan. And I would appreciate it if you could refrain from acting like a child. You are well aware of how these things work. You do as I say. Or else, Joss..."
"Stop, Dad. Do not give us more reasons to hate you. I have already made all the necessary arrangements for the date," I replied, taking a deep breath and rising from my seat.
"But there is one more thing you must do, Tawan," my father said, his voice lowering ominously.
I paused in my tracks, raising an eyebrow in anticipation. I waited for him to reveal what he had in mind.
"You must make him fall in love with you," Dad stated firmly.
I was startled when I choked on my saliva. "Excuse me, Dad?"
"You're excused."
"What the fuck are you talking about?"
He stared at me with his cold eyes, unmoved by my reaction. "Before you can make him fall, you must first earn his trust. Make him develop feelings for you," he said calmly.
I shook my head in disbelief. This was beyond ridiculous. "What on earth are you talking about, Father?"
Love? How can I possibly make someone love me?
His intense gaze made me uncomfortable all of a sudden. He took a sip of his drink and asked, "Will you do as I say?"
Feeling exhausted and resigned, I sighed and nodded. "Yes, but how?"
"You will discover soon enough," Father responded simply before returning to his newspaper.
I swiftly left the room, instructing P'Som to bring my breakfast to my quarters. Communicating with people was the last thing I wanted to do right now. I felt utterly drained. What is happening to me? What is this Thitipoom doing to me?
Lying down and gazing up at the ceiling, my legs dangling over the edge of the bed, I contemplated how this year had taken an unexpected turn. Everything was now in disarray.
Clearly, Father had a hidden motive behind his words. Why is he forcing me to make someone fall in love with me? Why the fuck is he forcing me to marry Thitipoom? The memory of the dream I had in the morning resurfaced in my mind, along with vivid images of his captivating appearance. I sighed once more and turned around to survey my room.
To put it bluntly, my room is predominantly black. Various shades of black, gray, and white permeate the entirety of the space. Our entire house is immersed in darkness. The color scheme of the paint, the walls, and even the ceilings is predominantly black.
However, things used to be more vibrant before my mother disappeared. She made it a point to infuse our somber existence with color. But now, everything has regressed back to its monochromatic state of blackness.
The sound of the phone ringing reverberated across the room. I glanced at my phone on the nightstand, yet made no effort to answer it. Not at this moment, at least.
It rang once more and ceased. Silence enveloped the room once again. It was so silent that one could hear a pin drop. I found solace in this silence. However, the phone continued to ring persistently. I deliberately chose to ignore it.
"Tawan?" P'Som's voice resonated from beyond the closed door, followed by a knock.
"Yes," I replied, still resting on my bed.
She entered the room and placed a tray of food on the table near the large window. I let out a sigh and finally approached her. She smiled warmly as I drew closer, and I nodded in acknowledgement. Just then, the phone began to ring once again.
P'Som looked at me with a knowing smile. "I could hear the ring from afar. It might be an important call... Why don't you pick it up?"
I shook my head firmly. "No, P'Som. I do not wish to speak with anyone at the moment."
"Shall I answer and inform them that you are occupied?" she proposed.
"Would you, please?" I requested.
"Of course, Tawan," she agreed, nodding in understanding.
P'Som reached for the phone and answered, "Hello?"
Silence followed.
Suddenly, her eyes brightened. "Oh... Alright, ma'am. I will relay the message."
"....."
"Thank you. I hope you have a pleasant day," P'Som concluded the call.
Curiosity piqued, I raised an eyebrow and asked, "Who was it?"
"Miss Mook. New Thitipoom's sister."
"P'Mook?" I repeated, slightly surprised.
P'Som nodded and motioned for me to begin eating. "She has something important to discuss with you. She wants you to call back as soon as possible."
"Okay." I simply nodded.
What could she want to talk about? Could this have something to do with Thitipoom? That guy seems to bring nothing but trouble, both to myself and my personal well-being. How vexing.
P'Som left me to enjoy my breakfast undisturbed. Following that, I swiftly showered and made the decision to call P'Mook. She answered after four rings.
"Tay?" She spoke cheerfully over the phone.
"Yes, P'Mook. Um... You wished to speak?" I couldn't help but feel a sense of unease.
"How are you doing?"
"Good. What did you wish to discuss, Phi?"
"At what time will you be picking up New?" she inquired.
Has Father not informed them? "10," I simply replied.
P'Mook let out a sigh. "Um... Tay? Could you perhaps come around 11 instead? Please..."
"Why? Is something wrong?"
"No that's not the case. Actually Newwie's a bit nervous about the date. I'll send him don't worry but he needs a bit time. Is that okay?"
I inhaled deeply. "He seemed much more composed when he berated me the other day."
She giggled. "Even I was taken aback. I never anticipated that he would address anyone in that manner. He explained the incident to me."
Silence hung in the air. He has already divulged everything to her. Did she contact me because of that? "Will you inform my father about what took place?" I queried instead.
She chuckled once more. "No, Tay. However, I want to apologize for New's conduct. He typically does not glare at people while conversing. He does not shout, nor does he argue. He only acts this way towards us. What you mentioned to Newwie was improper. I am in no position to admonish you for that. But I make a request."
I let out a sigh. "What is it?"
She took a deep breath and paused momentarily before speaking. "Can you please refrain from shouting at him today? Can you find it in yourself to forgive him if he speaks to you impolitely? Trust me, Tay. He is not pursuing your money. He earns his own income. In fact, he's been financially independent."
I shook my head and held my temple. I'm getting a headache. "Why are you telling me all of this, P'Mook?"
"Because I raised him, Tay."
There was a long silence. I waited for her to continue.
She finally spoke. "I don't know if you already know this, but Aunt Ann is not our mother. She is our father's second wife."
I gasped. "What the fuck?"
"Yes," she chuckled. "We didn't have a mother growing up to take care of us. Our father wasn't of much help either, so we took care of each other instead. He grew up without parental love. And I don't know if I raised him right, but he's a good kid. I kindly request you to be patient with him. I understand that all of this is overwhelming for you as well, but I urge you not to harm my younger brother."
I remained silent as she continued. "He may have appeared confident yesterday, but this morning he was filled with apprehension. He feared that you would still be angry with him after the events of yesterday. I know this might be too much to ask for, but... Take care of my brother, Tay." She paused at last.
I stood there, holding the phone against my ear. I was at a loss for words. This was entirely unexpected. I never anticipated that he would take our trivial conversation so seriously. Is he now afraid of me?
"P'Mook... Please do not worry," was all I could manage to say.
Oh, why the fuck did I respond that way?
"Okay... Tay, please make sure Newwie doesn't hear about this conversation."
"He won't." I said.
She hung up after saying goodbye. After taking a moment to compose myself, I cleared my mind and focused on the task at hand. I diligently worked on responding to work-related emails for an hour on my laptop before taking a well-deserved break.
As per P'Mook's request, I arrived at my destination slightly behind schedule. Opting to drive myself instead of relying on our family driver, I made my way to the Thitipoom's house.
Upon reaching the house, I was greeted by the sight of Mrs. Techaapaikhun standing at the gate, beckoning me inside. Parking my car in the limited space available, I entered the house where P'Mook warmly welcomed me with a smile. Sensing a hint of unease in her demeanor, I acknowledged her with a nod.
"New is in the bathroom. He'll be back soon." Mrs. Techaapaikhun spoke.
I nodded. "I can wait."
"Let me bring you something to drink. Coffee? Tea? Juice?" She gave me a smile.
I shook my head. "No, it's fine."
This world works in a funny way. You offer worthless leaches a pity hand, the opportunity for an upgrade of that filthy lifestyle, and the next thing you know they latch onto the base of your neck, sucking your blood out vehemently.
This is a mere reminder to why you should never offer worthless dogs your hand, because sooner or later they'll bite off of it.
Nature beats nurture. Always.
I survived too many storms to be bothered by raindrops.
Thitipoom arrived downstairs about five minutes later, and the vivid image of him from my dream replayed in my mind. His fair skin was beautifully complemented by the light pink shirt he was wearing, causing him to appear radiant.
"You're late. Hurry up," Mrs. Techaapaikhun said.
He nodded, hugged P'Mook, and followed me silently.
I opened the passenger door for him. He hesitated, then sat down without a word. I closed the door and got into the driver's seat.
I sighed. "Put in on."
He didn't look at me. "W-what?"
I gestured towards the seat belt, prompting him to fasten it. He nodded, adjusted himself into a more comfortable position, and I started the engine. As the car began to move, I navigated a turn, exiting his house premises.
Our first destination was a temple, where we needed to make offerings in preparation for our upcoming wedding. This tradition has been a longstanding practice in our family.
Normally, both the husband and wife would partake in this ritual alongside other family members. However, due to everyone's busy schedules, it was just the two of us this time. Reflecting on potential companions, I considered asking Off or Arm to join us before dismissing the idea.
"Sorry," Thitipoom suddenly whispered.
Perplexed, I inquired, "What?"
As he averted his gaze and fidgeted with his hands, he stammered, "I-I'm s-sorry. Um... About yesterday."
I simply nodded, realizing I may have stressed him out with my words from yesterday. It bothers me more than I expected. Despite my usual rudeness to others, I feel guilty.
The song "Nothing Can Change This Love" by Sam Cooke playing on the radio served as a poignant backdrop to my swirling emotions.
♪ If I go a million miles away
I'd write a letter each and every day
'Cause honey, nothing, nothing
Can ever change this love I have for you ♪
As I focus on driving, I sense Thitipoom stealing glances in my direction, yet remaining silent. His stomach grumbles, prompting me to glance at him, only to find him biting his lower lip again. Fuck! My pants tightened. This is not good- I must do something about it soon. How did I allow someone to affect me so easily?
"Are you hungry?" I inquired, feeling a pang of hunger myself. Although, not for food.
"Y-yes," he responded with a shy nod.
Why is he so endearing-no, I should not be thinking like this. He is a man. Something must be amiss with me, perhaps due to my lack of recent intimate encounters. It seems my hormones are playing tricks on me.
It's funny how Mrs. Techaapaikhun asked me if I wanted to drink something but she didn't even notice her son starving. Instead of turning right, I abruptly turned left and pulled over near a restaurant, parking in the designated spot.
The establishment displayed the name "Weerayut" prominently in bold letters. I glanced at Thitipoom beside me, finding him mesmerized by the eatery, his mouth slightly agape. Oh, for fuck's sake!
"He resembles his stepmother," I mumbled before stepping out of the car, leaving Thitipoom speechless.
He quickly exited the car and followed closely behind as we approached the restaurant. I stopped in my tracks when I felt a slight tug on my shirt sleeve. Turning around, I saw Thitipoom holding my shirt sleeve with his left hand, looking hesitant but meeting my gaze.
He stammered, "I-I'm not hungry. C-can we go b-back?"
Surprised, I composed myself and replied, "What?!"
With his finger still tucked in my shirt and his other hand behind his back, something seemed amiss. Despite my efforts, he remained reluctant to speak.
I sighed, "Don't cause a scene, Thitipoom. This is my friend's restaurant. Can you please cooperate?"
He raised his head up slightly, "D-do they have d-discount on food?"
I found myself resorting to a white lie to diffuse the tension. "Yes."
Despite the steep prices at Arm's family restaurant, money wasn't an issue for me. I wanted Thitipoom to eat so we could continue our plans.
He sighed, nodded at me, indicating a desire to go inside. The guards at the front door bowed, and a waitress approached. "Do you have a reservation, sir?" she inquired.
Before I could respond, someone interjected, "He doesn't need a reservation, Film. He's a VIP here." He winked at her, "You can leave now. I'll handle his order."
Film blushed slightly, nodded, and hurried off to attend other customers.
"Arm," I said with a nod.
He greeted me with his usual smile and approached, asking, "Sorry, Tay. She's new here. Why are you here?"
I rolled my eyes. "Planning to take over the world. You know. The usual."
Amused, he remarked, "Oh, you're here to eat."
I gave him a stern look. "No shit, Sherlock!"
He chuckled and turned his attention towards Thitipoom, who was observing Arm quietly.
Arm raised his eyebrows at me and inquired, "Who's this?"
Stammering, I attempted to explain, "He's my... My-"
"OMG! Yours? I'm the first one to meet! Yahoo!" Arm jumped with excitement, pulling me into a hug. I pushed him back, glaring.
"You didn't mention how beautiful he is!" Arm smiled at Thithipoom and extended his hand. "Arm Weerayut. Tay's bestfriend. I'm so happy I met him before Off did. Now I can brag!"
Thithipoom looked at me confused, then shook hands with Arm. Arm held onto his hand, gazing at him lovingly. I cleared my throat to get their attention.
Thithipoom blushed and smiled at Arm. But it made me irritated knowing he wouldn't smile at me. However, he still hadn't let go of my shirt.
"I'll show you to the VIP section. Follow me!" Arm said enthusiastically.
Upon entering the lavish area with plush seating and elegant decor, we settled in a secluded corner with a panoramic view through a glass wall. Arm, told us to check the menu and said he'll be back when we're ready to order. The Bangkok cityscape looked as mesmerizing as ever.
Thitipoom released my shirt, sat across from me, and I noticed he appeared distressed. Despite his usual beauty, he continued to scrunch his face until our eyes met. Upon seeing my gaze, he averted his eyes and composed himself.
"What's worng?" I asked him sternly.
He shook his head no and remained silent, but then I noticed a mark on his forehead. Is that a fucking cut?
"Who did this to you?"
"What?"
I pointed at the fresh wound on his forehead. He was silent as he met my gaze, covering it well with his bangs, so I didn't even notice it before.
He lowered his head and said, "Oh... It's- I fell."
"Let me see..."
"No!" He yelled.
What the actual fuck? I raised my brow.
"I- I mean, it's nothing, really." He shrugged clearly uncomfortable. "I-I'm ready to o-order." He said instead.
He didn't fall- he was obviously lying to me. Fuck this shit! Whoever did that to him, is going to pay! I'll make him talk.
I'll make him talk about everything that hurts him.
Although it was a deceptive gesture on my part, I spoke after a long pause. "You have something in your hair. Um... Do you want me to get it out?"
When he nodded, I moved closer, brushed aside his bangs, and saw the fresh wound. It was not properly cleaned, with clotted and dried blood.
He winced when I tried to touch it. "Don't, please... It hurts." His voice trembled ever so slightly.
Fuck! I felt a sharp pain in my chest.
"Ojalá supiera qué decir."
"W-what?" He looked at me confused.
I shook my head. "We should clean this to prevent infection. Why didn't you apply ointment? Let's go to the hospital after eating. We can go make merits in the evening."
"It's not bad. W-we can go make merit. I-I can take care of it later."
I glared at him, and without a word, gestured towards the glass wall. I called Arm by pressing a button on the table.
"Arm, do you have a first aid kit?" I inquired.
Arm's eyes widened. "What happened? Are you okay?!"
Thitipoom watched as I pointed to his injury. "No, he requires assistance."
"Are you okay? Where are you hurt?" Arm hurried to Thitipoom and examined his injury.
"I-I'm fine. It's n-not-"
"Oh, that looks serious. That must've been painful. What happened?" Arm called over a waiter for first aid, and a lady promptly attended to Thitipoom's wound, applying a Hydrocolloid dressing.
"All done," she said smiling at Thitipoom.
He smiled back at her, "Thank you."
She nodded and quickly left. After that, we ordered our food, and Thitipoom ate dessert before the starters, which led to a little argument. I told him how sweets can cause gum rot, leading to pyorrhea and other problems. He countered by citing a recent study that suggested eating dessert first might actually aid in weight loss.
I had to give up in the end. He's so stubborn. I thought he was afraid of me now, but once he ate, he became a completely different person. More self-reliant.
We said our goodbyes to Arm, and I promised him to continue our TGIF hangouts as we usually did. Lately, I had been slacking off, but I assured him I would meet him and Off at the usual bar next Friday.
As I was about to leave, Arm grabbed my shirt, indicating he had a lecture on kindness in store. I sighed, knowing what was coming, and gestured for Thitipoom to wait by the car. Turning to face Arm with a raised eyebrow, I asked, "Yes?"
Arm lightly chuckled, suggesting, "Thitipoom seems like a good kid. Have you thought about giving him a chance?"
I rolled my eyes, "Good kids aren't my type."
Arm grinned, "You didn't deny considering it. Will you follow my advice?"
"No. You know me, Arm. I'm not interested. This is all for Dad's sake. Thitipoom is a pain in the ass, putting on an act for others. You should hear him when we're alone." I glared at him.
Arm raised an eyebrow, "What's he like when you're alone?"
I growled, "I don't know! Just stop talking about him. I have a headache."
Arm took a deep breath. "You never care for people, Tay! And I just saw you freak out when you saw his wound. What am I supposed to make out of it? Do you like him?"
I widened my eyes and glared at him. "Are you sick in the head?! I hate him! He's trouble and nothing else!"
Arm patted my shoulder. "Okay, Tay! I won't say much but think about what I said. He's good, don't hurt him."
I let out a groan. "I haven't even touched him! Why would I hurt him?"
Arm widened his mouth. "You- what!? That's impossible!"
I might have touched those plump full lips, but Arm doesn't need to know that.
With a growl, I cut the conversation short before it could progress further. "Let's talk on Friday. I really need to go now." I said and quickly walked away from Arm, who was still muttering something.
"-And stop hanging out with Gun! He's filling garbage in your head!" I yelled before getting in the driver's seat.
"Bye bye, lover boy!" Arm shouted as I drove away. He's really sick in the head.
Upon our late afternoon arrival at the temple, we found there to be fewer visitors, allowing us to swiftly accomplish our act of merit. While it is traditional to offer food to a monk in the morning as a means of earning merit, busier individuals often opt to make these offerings in the evening as well.
Thitipoom and I made our offerings of food, flowers, snacks, and drinks to the monks at the temple, in exchange for which we had the opportunity to listen to their sermons.
As we departed from the temple, I observed the evening sky growing darker, with the setting sun casting an orange hue over the horizon.
"Would you like to take a walk on the beach?" I inquired after a brief moment of quiet. I suddenly felt compelled to bring him to the nearby beach, for reasons unknown to me.
He nodded, slightly flustered. I had never taken anyone out in my whole life. I enjoy doing things alone. It's an opportunity to spend time with yourself, unwind, and enjoy your own company. As someone who has often dined alone, going to the beach solo feels far less out of the ordinary than going with someone by my side.
The stroll along the seaside was calming, with the vast ocean rippling along the shore while my toes sank into the cool sand.
As I stole a discreet glance at Thitipoom, I couldn't help but notice the subtle smile playing on his lips, a smile that seemed to be specially crafted to charm. It was evident that his mere presence had a profound impact on my emotions, openly stirring something within me.
New Thitipoom is a proverbial ray of sunshine- with everyone but me.
His smile, though devoid of any real joy in his eyes, complemented by his plump, inviting lips, rosy cheeks, and a charming dimple, painted a picture of undeniable beauty. His soft, melodious voice, gently echoing in the air, and his slender waist only added to his allure. In that moment, he seemed nothing short of a dream, a vision of perfection that felt out of reach for someone like me.
As I struggled to contain the whirlwind of emotions that his presence invoked within me, I couldn't help but marvel at the sheer beauty and enchantment that surrounded him. It was a bittersweet realization that some dreams may forever remain unattainable, yet the memory of him would linger, a poignant reminder of a fleeting encounter with an exquisite impossibility.
He was like a dream that I could never attain.
∆∆∆
[A/N]
I apologize for not including any author's notes (A/N) in this book. I made this choice to ensure that nothing interrupts your reading experience. I understand how bothersome it can be to have A/N appearing within the text, disrupting the flow of the story.
Instead of including them directly, I have opted to express my thoughts and gratitude in the comments section. While I may not adequately convey my appreciation, I want you to know that I feel truly fortunate for the immense love and support you have shown toward my humble book.
Thank you all, and please know that I care deeply for each and every one of your comments. Love you all Polca... And Happy 3K+ read!!💙💕🍒