Theo could feel the needle poke into his neck, his spine stiffened as a small needle pain shot through him. The heat of someone standing behind him, making his anxiety spike.
When the liquid started flowing into his veins, his mind started to become slow and sluggish, slowing down until there was nothing left. Theo's vision started blurring in and out of focus. It was becoming hard to keep his eyelids open. The needle receded from his neck, painstakingly slow. His mind went silent. The person that was behind him stepped away.
Theo wiggled his fingers at his sides, making fists, to make sure that he could still feel them. He can.
"May the truth set you free." He heard the person, a man, say. There was a crowd in the building with them, the size of a small, round sports stadium.
Theo was in a sphere of large metal pillars that curled inward to make a ball around him. They looked like giant fingers coming up from the ground. He started to breathe heavily as memories came flooding back to him. Being trapped in his own hell, trapped in a morgue cabinet, didn't help his claustrophobia.
Memories of breaking out of the tight little morgue cabinets, over and over again, only so that his sister, Tara, could rip out his–Her–heart. Hell was very traumatizing, he wouldn't wish that upon anyone, even his worst enemy.
Even though he wasn't fully trapped, as there weren't any walls or glass, or anything, keeping him from escaping the metal fingers, he still felt trapped.
He looked around, panicked, looking for a familiar face. A face he melted at when he saw it. One he felt completely and utterly comfortable with. One that he would be happy with, if it was the last face he saw. Any face.
"Liam," Theo whispered under his breath. His body relaxed, not completely, but enough. When Liam half-smiled, Theo's eyes grew a little wider. He didn't realize Liam could hear him because of the drug in his system. Surprised, Theo quickly returned the half smile to Liam. The crowd around them echoing the motto that the voice had said a minute ago.
"Theodore Karl Raeken," he could hear someone, the man, announce. It felt weird because he was rarely ever referred to by his full name. Only by Theo.
"You were accused of betraying your friends–" the person spoke again, "I mean, if we could even call them that," a small pause, "by manipulating them into letting you in their little group," 'pack' Theo corrected in his mind, "and then killing your childhood friend, Scott McCall. Is this true?" The voice echoed in Theo's ear making him wince.
"Yes." Theo finally said, answering his question.
"How did you plan on doing it? What was the plan?"
While Theo did kill Scott, it wasn't his original plan. He wanted Liam to do it because he wanted Scott's alpha powers. He wanted to be an alpha himself. But he could only become an alpha if Liam was the one who killed Scott. With Scott being a True Alpha only the True Alpha's beta. In this case, Liam, could take away his powers. Theo wanted to physically resist the serum, and he must have, because the voice comes back.
"Theo, don't resist the serum. It will only make it worse." Theo could feel the injection site, like pins and needles. Like how your foot falls asleep when you've been in one position for a long time. His throat started itching. After a small groan, Theo cleared his throat, which of course didn't help at all, and started talking again. Of course, the itch immediately went away.
"I was planning on making Scotts beta," Theo quickly glanced at liam then away again, "do it. It was the only way that the alpha powers would be passed along. Then I was going to k-" He Couldn't make himself say that word. A stabbing pain shot through his chest like a knife had stabbed his—Tara's—heart, he hated himself for what he planned on doing. "receive the alpha powers." Theo corrected himself.
"One more final question," pause, "When you got to the point of the kill," another longer pause, making the last word fester in Theo's mind, "why couldn't you finish it?" The voice demanded, almost like it was Theo's alpha. Again, Theo resisted the urge to speak because if he did, he didn't know what would happen. "Don't. fight. it. Theo."
A low growl escaped Theo's lips.
"Because when it came to killing Liam Dunbar," he started slowly, cringing at the words that just came out of his mouth, "I couldn't do it because," repeating words, giving himself more time to prepare, "because I'm in love with him." He finally blurts out.
Stadium goes silent. You could drop a pin and hear it fall on the floor. Theo looks over at Liam through blurry vision. His pixely body, frozen.
"Liam," Theo starts slowly, as if he's speaking directly to him instead of a room full of people, "I don't know why it's taken me this long to admit it but," pause, "I've loved you since we met. I only realized once you brought me back from hell."
The words 'I've loved you since we met' repeated in Liam's head.
"Thank you for your candor," The voice concludes, breaking Liam out of his thoughts. The crowd echoes him not even a second later.
"Oh, what an interesting turn of events." The voice sounded surprised.
***
Liam just glares over at the source of the voice. He's scowling at the fact that they just ruined this moment with Theo.
"Alright, my turn." Liam mumbled under his breath. Liam was shaking nervously. He didn't want to do this test— or whatever they were calling it—out of fear. Fear that something would come out of his mouth that he didn't want to come out. People were saying this magical serum was very strong. If you tried resisting it, it would somehow be worse for you. Exactly how Theo's test went. That's why Liam never even tried resisting.
He felt the needle jab into his neck harshly. With the liquid being injected into his system, he felt more and more free. Every second that passes, he could feel himself get comfortable.
He didn't know what to think of Theo's test. Did it mean that he wanted to be with liam? It was all so confusing.
"May the truth set you free," he heard the same crowd say from around him.
"Liam Eugene Dunbar," pause, "at what point did you begin to trust Theo?" The voice asked.
'why did he have to say my full name?' Liam thought. Liam hated his middle name. Eugene. It's so weird. 'Three Es in one stupid middle name? Seriously? What's weirder than that?'
"I began to trust Theo the minute I met him. In the woods. I didn't know it then but I saw how broken and traumatized he was. From the Dread Doctors. Having been their test subject ever since he was 9." Liam answered. Liam didn't know how he knew that. Possibly from being so close to Theo ever since the Inuk–ite and Gerard, Monroe and their hunters.
"Now why did you—after he manipulated and lied his way into your pack—bring him back from underground? The place that Kira Yukimura sent him with her sword, that they thought he deserved." Liam cringed when the voice said 'underground'.
"Because I don't think he deserved it," Liam hesitated, thinking about his words at the hospital, before clearing his throat. He looked up and around at the large crowd.
'I also think you deserved it,' running through his head. Now knowing that it was a lie. If only Past-Liam could hear what he was saying now. He continued explaining what he meant.
"I mean, yea he may have lied and manipulated us to get what he wanted, but people can only behave how they are raised. What I mean is, Theo was manipulated into being mean and evil by the Dread Doctors. To kill his sister. Which, who would do that in a normal mental mindset? I'm pretty sure Theo loved Tara. Very much. I believe he would never kill her in his right mind," Liam ranted. He paused, looking over at Theo whose eyes looked heavy and were glossy with tears, his chest, covered by his crossed arms, heaving with big breaths trying to stay calm. He could tell Theo was about to start crying soon. Liam continued, looking back at the crowd.
"He was manipulated into thinking that he had to survive. He didn't want to end up like all the other failed chimera attempts," Liam quickly picturing Tracy Stewart's, Josh Diaz' and Donovan Donati's dead bodies, "that the dread doctors brought in and out of the operating theatre day after day." He looked at Theo again. "No one does."
Again, Liam's mind flickers to Theo in the holding cell at the sheriff's station, admitting that he didn't wanna be in anyone's pack, that he just wanted to stay alive. Of how Liam had broken Kira's sword, right in front of him, the only thing that could have sent Theo back to hell, showing him that he was safe. That he wasn't going to be sent back to hell anytime soon. Showing him just how much Liam trusted that Theo would tell the truth and help them defeat the ghost riders.
"You're right. No one does but why did you specifically bring Theo," the source of the voice walking over to Theo and patting his shoulders, "back? Why didn't you think of anyone else?"
"I-I don't know, I've been thinking about him everyday since he was sent into the ground. I- I missed him."
Theo's lips quivered in a small half smile, eyes still glossy with unshed tears. One of his I-want-to-smile-but-don't-wanna-show-any-emotion kind of smiles.
"Thank you for your candor," the voice says. Once again, the crowd echos.
Liam crosses his arms around his chest, clamming up, suddenly feeling naked, vulnerable, exposed. Like the inside of his brain is out in the open for everyone to see. Everyone, including Theo.
They didn't say a word to each other until Theo was dropping Liam off at his house. It was late and Liam was tired so he said a quick goodbye to Theo and got out of the truck. Shutting the door he turned around and started heading inside but he didn't hear the truck start up right away. He turned around to see Theo still looking at him. He nodded at Liam and sent him a small smile.
That is when he started the truck and took off.
***
He started his truck, stepped on the gas and sped off. Liam did not know he was going to the preserve to find a place to sleep. In the backseat of his truck.
Theo didn't know what happened. He was feeling a whole lot of emotions, despite what he told Liam after the zoo.
"People only feel one emotion at a time, liam," his soft spoken words come back to him. he guesses he was wrong. People can feel a lot.
He felt guilty. He didn't want Liam to fall for him, Even though he was in love with Liam. He doesn't want Liam to be stupid enough to fall for him, in the current state of mind that he's in. He would hurt Liam the first chance he got because that's all he knew. How to hurt people. Physically, emotionally and mentally. How to use people to get what he wants. He didn't want to hurt Liam. In any way.
He felt safe. There was safety in knowing that Liam doesn't hate him. Knowing that, he knew he wasn't going to be sent back to hell anytime soon.
He felt relieved. Someone finally knew about him being forced to work for the dread doctors all those years. Not to mention all that at a young age.
He parked his truck on the edge of the preserve, climbed into his back seat, got his blanket and used his school backpack,which he hasn't used, hasn't had to use it since before he was sent to hell, as a pillow and laid down. It felt like an hour before he got comfortable enough to fall asleep but even when he was comfortable, he still could fall asleep.
***
Liam couldn't stop thinking of Theo. Of how he kept saving him from the ghost riders and werewolf hunters, how he never, not once, teased him about his IED and how he stopped Liam from killing people, something he knew he would regret later.
Liam couldn't help but drift off to peaceful sleep thinking about Theo.
Liam and Theo, who was in coyote form, were running around together in the preserve, Theo chasing Liam. Liam laughing and having fun.
Just then an arrow pierced through Theo's body, spraying blood onto liam. Liam clasped beside Theo, siphoning his pain.
"No, No Theo, you're okay. You're gonna be okay. Breathe, Theo, please breathe." Liam breathed, panicking.
Liam woke up sweating and panting. He sat up in his bed, his sheets soaked with sweat. How long was he asleep? Liam swooped his legs over the side of his bed. He looked over at the alarm clock.
3:30Am.
Why did he have a nightmare about Theo getting killed? Did he really care about Theo that much? Liam stood up, grabbing clothes getting ready for a shower to get all the sweat off his body.
He walked over to the bathroom, put some music on and hopped into the shower. No fear in waking his parents because they both were at work. His step father is a doctor at the hospital and his mother, an overnight public bus driver.
He stood under the cool calming spray of the water and thought about his nightmare.
Why did he have that kind of dream about Theo? Sure Liam trusted him but it wasnt that deep, right? Right?
***
After about an hour and a half of trying to get to sleep, Theo finally gave up and got back into the driver's seat of his truck. He started the engine and pulled back out onto the road. He didn't know where to go so he just let his- her- heart take him where he wanted.
He eventually found himself in Liam's neighborhood. He was confused. Why did he, subconsciously, want to go to Liam's?
He pulled over on the opposite side of the road as Liam's house and turned off the engine. He listened in on Liam's heartbeat, trying to figure out why he ended up here. Until he heard Liam start to breathe heavier.
He got worried. He pulled out his phone ready to call Liam, thumb hovering over his contact, but he wasn't sure if Liam would hear him in the street, werewolf hearing and all. So he refrained from calling him. Instead he just waited.
***
Liam got out of the shower and went back to his room. Having a shower, woke him up fully so there was no way he was getting back to sleep. He decided he was going to clean his room because that NEEDED to be done.
He started picking up his dirty clothes from his floor and placing them in his laundry basket in front of his window. Already his room started looking cleaner. He looked out at the street. That's when he noticed something unusual. A vehicle there, that's not always there.
Theos truck sitting across from his house. Liam could see the silhouette of Theo sitting in the Driver's seat with his head leaning back on the head rest.
He slowly started making his way downstairs and outside.
***
Tap. Tap. Tap.
Theo was woken by tapping on the passenger side window. He thought it was more deputies telling him that he couldn't park here or more hunters aiming guns at him, ready to do damage to his very beautiful, very fixed, truck again. When he slowly opened his eyes he saw that it was Liam. He panicked internally.
What was he supposed to tell Liam? That he fell asleep to the sound of his heartbeat? Because that is what happened. He didn't want to have to admit it. Reluctantly, he unlocked the truck from his door panel, Liam immediately opening the passenger door. Liam sat down on the passenger seat but didn't say anything for a few seconds giving Theo more time to start talking, but when Theo didn't open his mouth after a few seconds, Liam began.
"So," Liam said, staring out at the road in front of the truck, "what are you doing?" He prodded curiously. Theo was looking out of his window thinking of a response..
"I've been asking myself the same thing." Theo said, just under his breath but Liam could still hear it because werewolf hearing, of course. Liam smiled softly, remembering the moment in the hospital elevator.
Liam glanced at Theo for a minute, unsure of what to say next.
Theo was mentally cursing himself for subconsciously driving to Liam's house because, "I don't know why I ended up here, Liam," Theo began, "I don't know why I drove here from where I was comfortable in the preserve."
Liam frowned at Theos last words. Meaning thats where he had been sleeping.
"Well," Liam hesitated, unsure about how Theo was going to react to what he was about to say, "let's talk." He suggested. Theo physically flinched at what Liam had said.
Theo wasn't used to having family, let alone friends, who wanted to talk about anything like that. From growing up in sewer tunnels and under the 'roof' of the Dread Doctors from a young age, he never had anyone close enough to him that they wanted to talk to him. He was a tool to be used and put away, ready for next time he was needed. Ever since then he's forced himself not to care about anything or anyone because he knows they're just going to use him. Like he was going to use Liam. Theo had to physically stop his thought.
"I'd rather not." Theo said dryly.
Liam was done dancing around him like he would explode at any second.
"I don't care. We can't keep doing this," Liam spit, "We can't keep this, this awkward silence between us. We have to talk about it."
"You wanna talk about it? Go ahead, talk. I'm not stopping you." Theo deadpanned. "Just don't expect me to respond." He added with a small smirk.
"Why do you have to be so difficult?" Liam sighed.
They stayed silent in the car for another couple of minutes until Liam broke the silence saying, "You know, holding everything in doesn't help," under his breath.
Theo thought about that for a moment. It's not like he wants to keep everything in, because deep down he wants to tell Liam how he feels. Yes he already did that but it was because of some silly truth serum thing that forced out the truth. Theo needed to tell Liam how he feels on his own terms. Not only for Liam's sake but also for his own.
Theo realized that that's why Liam pretended that nothing happened afterwards.
That's all that needed to be said. Theo took a breath in and started his truck up.
"Why are you even awake right now? It's 4Am.." Theo trailed as the truck started moving without Liam telling him where to go. He knew Liam wanted to get out of there. At least for now.
"I couldn't sleep." Liam muttered, not giving anymore unnecessary details.
As Theo kept driving, Liam's words, 'Holding everything in doesn't help', kept repeating in his head.
They were, subconsciously, driving towards the preserve when Theo stopped his truck and pulled over on the side of the road. He was breathing heavily again. Opening his door, he got out and started running towards the trees feeling a shift coming.
"Theo!" Liam's voice echoed.
Theo stopped in his tracks, turning around just enough to see Liam getting out of the truck, he took off again, not having enough time to wait for Liam, to say what he needed to say, before the shift took over his body. He got just past the tree-line and started undressing himself because he didn't want his clothes to be ruined by his shift. He needed to remember where he put them because he would need to find them again afterwards. He took off running in wolf form.
***
Liam stared after Theo thinking of what he should— what he can— do. He obviously couldn't drive, legally anyways, so he didn't even try to take Theo's truck. He didn't want to wake anyone else from the pack up so he didn't call anyone to come pick him up. Even though they would if he called. So he just walked back to Theo's truck, opened the door, got in and waited for him to return.
At some point during that time, Liam must have fallen asleep because the next thing he knew the driver's door was opening and Theo, shiny with sweat but fully clothed yet again, was getting back into his truck. Liam sat up from where he was slumped down in his sleep.
They both stayed silent. They both didn't know what to say to each other. Liam didn't know what to say to Theo, who had just run off in the woods as a wolf for a few hours, and Theo didn't know what excuse to use for why he did that. They both could somehow sense that in the other person.
Liam was the first to break the silence, "Are you okay?" he asked, worried. Theo quickly looked away.
A million things were going through Theo's head. He didn't know how to deal with them. All of what he knew was from the dread doctors and what little he learned from grade school before he was taken. He didn't know how to deal with the things he was feeling. He looked at Liam again.
"Yea," he slowly nodded, hesitant to continue, thinking about whether he wanted to say something or not. Deciding that he was ready to tell liam how he felt, he began,"Remember... Remember what you said before...?" He trailed off. Liam only nodded, signaling for Theo to continue.
"The whole time I was on my run," he glanced over at the trees, "I was thinking about it. What you said. And... I don't want to keep it in. I don't. Not anymore."
He looks back over at Liam. Liam wants to say something but he cant get his mouth to cooperate so he just nods again. He wanted to mention all the times that Theo had manipulated and weasled his way into his pack by lies and deception, just to end up killing Liam's alpha, Scott McCall, who was resuscitated by a nurse, his own mother. He stayed quiet though.
"But being raised by the doctors," This time, Theo did not look away from Liam. Keeping eye contact and fiddling with his fingers in his lap, Theo continued, "I learned not to allow myself to feel emotions because emotions are sometimes the thing that can hurt you the most." His eyes started to gloss over again. The second time ever that Liam has seen Theo get teary-eyed.
"I- '' Liam was cut off by Theo giving him a look that says 'wait-until-I'm-done'.
"I don't want to get hurt. Well, anymore than I already have," he glanced down at his chest, where the scar from the D.I.Y heart surgery was, "but I also, don't want to be that guy who never feels."
"You-you asked why I kept saving you, in the locker room at school with Gabe?.." he referenced.
Liam's mind flickered to that day.
"You made your point." Liam looked through the mirror at Theo behind him.
"And you didn't kill him. That's progress." Theo replied.
"Why do you keep trying to save me?'' Liam asked Theo, slowly turning around to face him. After he'd talked Liam down from killing Gabe, with a cracked and bloody mirror above the boy's locker room sink. Gabe lying on the ground below, face dripping with blood, evident that Liam had pushed Gabe's face against the mirror in a fit of rage. "You think it'll make Scott forget about everything you did? And he'll just let you into the pack? Scott's never gonna trust you.'' Liam pointed out.
Theo spoke, breaking Liam out of his flashback.
"I keep trying to save you, Liam, because I have grown to care about you, deeply." Theo admits. "There isn't anything that I wouldn't do for you."
"Doing this goes against everything that I have learnt from the Dread Doctors but I want to move on from them. All they have done since I met them is teach me to be selfish and a backstabber. I don't want to be those horrible things anymore." His voice was a whisper by the last sentence. Thinking about all he'd done to The Mccall pack playing on repeat in his head since he'd gotten back from hell, along with his sister ripping out his– her– heart from his chest. Taking back whats hers.
"So it's true then?" liam wondered. Theo raised an eyebrow, confused about what he meant by that. "What you said in the trial?" Liam clarified.
Theo remembered the trial and what he had said. "because I'm in love with him."
"It's true." was all Theo said with a smile. A full blown cheeky smile.
**
flash forward; One month later
Theo and Liam are running around in the Preserve. Just like in Liam's dream. Theo, in coyote form, running around Liam, who's laughing, trying to catch Theo. He's not even getting close.
When Theo finally gets tired, he sits down in the tall grass on the edge of the clearing, Liam plopping down beside him.
Theo, still in coyote form, lays down on Liam's lap. Liam rests his hands on Theo's warm, furry torso and moves his fingertips gently. Scratch-petting Theo. Theo makes an approving sound.
"You know, I'm thinking about all the things that had to have happened to get us to this point. You going to public elementary school with Scott and Stiles. Scott having to bite me..." liam hesitated, "that whole thing.." Liam trailed off. Theo made a whining noise signifying that he didn't like being reminded of that time.
"I know, but it all led us to this point, here," he gestured between them, "If you never did that, we would never have met."
After a moment liam said, "Im glad it happened like that."