Part 2 out of 2. I hope you enjoy <3
Jackie heard him give out another of his sighs.
"I've got nothing to say," he said. "It's the same rubbish as usual. I'm not angry with you. I never am." He paused, and she heard the familiar rumble in his throat. "I'm frustrated, but there's nothing I can do about it."
"You haven't called me for four days, and didn't invite me over right away, after I texted you," Jackie pointed out, sneaking a peep at him.
"I am angry," he repeated with a shrug.
He turned and studied the bouquet on the counter.
"You should tell me when it happens," Jackie blurted out. "And why you're angry, too. And tell me what I need to do to fix it! Alexander, I hate it that I'm upsetting and hurting you!"
He slowly faced her. She waited - but apparently he wasn't going to have a discussion. Jackie, on the other hand, felt quite the opposite.
"Alexander, I'm not good at this," she said. "At being in a relationship. In a good relationship. And I'm worried about all these other things, and I sort of lose sight of what's important. And because my standard of a relationship is so low, I don't notice if something goes wrong. It took me three days to realise that you aren't calling me and not coming over!" She pulled at her jumper again. "I'm not saying it right. You don't have to call or come over. But you normally do! And we've basically been living together! And then you just didn't come back, and I assumed that you didn't want to. And then I remembered that you said I should call you if I wanted you to. And of course I do! I don't sleep well without you. And it's boring. And I haven't felt like cooking, so I had a cup-o-noodle for supper yesterday. And the day before yesterday. And– Ugh, I'm not saying it right again."
She bent and set her forehead on his table.
"I suck at dating," she moaned.
"Yeah, a tad."
Jackie darted a side glance at him. He was surveying her now, with a shadow of amusement curling up the corners of his lips.
"Please tell me when I'm being a dick," Jackie begged.
"You aren't, though." He shrugged again. "You're scared people will find out. You explained the reasons to me. They make sense. You still decided to date me, despite it threatening your career." His voice was serious now. "That's why I'm not angry with you. I'm frustrated with the situation. And Stephen Bassey gets on my wick."
Jackie sat up straight.
"Why?! I mean, he knows that we're together! I'm not hiding it from him!"
"I didn't say anything about you," Alexander retorted. "Don't take responsibility for his shit."
Jackie opened - and then closed her mouth. Alexander had just outed her knee-jerk reaction; but, as she'd so loftily announced just a few hours ago in the back of the bakery: Stephen Bassey had nothing to do with her.
"He's whingy," Alexander grumbled. "And full of himself, at the same time. And–" He halted, and then rubbed the underside of his jaw with his knuckles. "Normally I don't give a toss. I am jealous, but that's because I had to wait for twelve years. You're bound to have exes. It never affects me that much. I gave it a thought; and I think that I feel insecure. Because some of the shit he spouts might be true. And it bothers me."
Jackie's heart clenched.
"What sort of... shit?" she asked.
"He mentioned the school and me being a pupil there before," Alexander listed impassively. "But we talked about it; and that's up to you. But also, that I can't be a good partner to you. Because of how I am." He tapped his index finger to his temple. "He worked with special needs pupils; so I reckon he knows. And it's true that you are forced to make 'concessions'. And if our relationship becomes a problem, I might not be able to support you. Emotionally speaking."
"Oh Alexander," Jackie exhaled. "I don't think that's true at all!"
"It's a little bit true." He suddenly bent down, folded his arms on the table, and lowered his cheek on his forearms. "I'm tired of talking."
Relief washed over Jackie. She wasn't going to escalate the matter; but if asked, she'd tell Stephen Bassey where he needed to stuff his opinion on Alexander's abilities to support Jackie emotionally. No one had ever made it that simple and comfortable for her! Concessions, my arse. The highlight of being with Alexander was how easily she could understand him as soon as he stopped purposefully shutting himself off.
He'd closed his eyes, and she ogled his fluffy long lashes.
"I love the flowers," he added. "And I missed you. Can we make up and have sex already?"
"You tell me," Jackie sing-songed. "I reckon, I was unconsciously hoping it would end like this, seeing I'm wearing new lingerie." Alexander's head shot up. Jackie grinned. "Just so you know I was fully prepared to apologise and grovel as much as it took." He slid off his chair; Jackie barked a throaty laugh; and then he knelt in front of her. "Also I should tell you about what happened–" She choked on her words, because his hands lay on her thighs. "I was going to– I'm actually pretty proud of–" she panted out, while his calloused palms travelled up, under the hem of her jumper, and over her sides.
The tips of his fingers bumped at the bottom of her new bustier - black and lace, just as he fancied them - and he snarled and pounced at her.
***
"Do you want me to carry you to the bathroom or bedroom?" he asked, tenderly moving a curl stuck to her sweaty temple.
"Could I have some water?" Jackie rasped out.
He kissed her shoulder, and she heard his bare feet patter on the floor. Jackie opened her eyes with significant difficulty and gawked at him: in all his six three glory, naked, his hair mussed, his gorgeous shapely backside on display. He opened the fridge and leaned in. Jackie had just had three crises in a rapid succession - and yet, figuratively speaking, her mouth watered.
"I've got some kombucha. Or there's water, but it's room temperature."
"Either sounds brilliant."
Jackie pulled herself up, grabbing the back of his modular. She felt immediately embarrassed to be sitting starkers in the middle of his half-empty, echoey sitting room. Their clothes were scattered on the floor, in a trail leading from the kitchen to the sofa, her knickers on his low coffee table. She'd shrewdly thrown his tee on the sofa, just before he'd toppled her onto it, to avoid rug burns and 'untidiness.'
"Here."
He handed her a glass of a fizzy bevvy - and his jumper. She threw him a surprised look, pulled the jumper on, and took the glass.
"You always get dressed after we're done," he said, watching her drink.
Jackie stilled, the glass still pressed to her lips.
"But you aren't going to the shower yet," he voiced another astute observation in a nonchalant tone, "does it mean we can do it again?"
Jackie gave it a thought, finished the kombucha, and carefully lowered the glass on the coffee table.
"But in the bedroom, yeah?" she asked - and squealed, already mid-air.
***
"I talked to Stephen and Eddie today," Jackie said hours later.
They'd just returned to bed after a highly satisfying shower. She was lying pretty much on top of him, her cheek resting on his shoulder blade. She felt him hum questioningly under her.
"I talked at them, to be precise," Jackie said with a soft laugh. "Just scolded them like a pair of children. Told them to stay out of my life and our relationship."
He was quiet, and Jackie stroked his prominent external oblique muscle.
"Also I told Bernie that I was dating you, when we had lunch today. She couldn't care less. Oh, and I told Rhys too. I ran into him outside the florist's."
"The school will know tomorrow," he said quietly.
"Yeah, probably." Jackie kissed his lighthouse tattoo. "Also, some of my pupils were in your shop when I went in with the bouquet."
He stretched his arm behind him and wrapped it around her, holding her against him, while he shifted and turned his head to look at her.
"Are you sure?"
"I am." She nuzzled his warm skin. "Of course I am, darling."
He rolled and arranged her on his chest, her buttock on his palm, just as usual. Jackie smiled and closed her eyes.
***
She was woken up by her alarm. It sounded muffled; and Jackie grunted and buried her face deeper into the pillow.
"Jackie, where's your phone?" Alexander asked nearby.
"Don't know." Jackie writhed, sliding her hands on the sheet under the duvet; grabbed him around his waist; and burrowed into him. "Don't care either."
"Are you not going to work today?"
"I am," she answered grudgingly. "But I'm planning to be shamelessly late, because I'm enjoying this too much."
He chuckled.
"Do you want me to get you your bag?"
"No!" Jackie pretended to sink her - too short for it - nails into him. "I'm keeping you."
"But the alarm–"
"Ugh, fine." Jackie peeled her eyes open and started clumsily rising. "Oh, no! You stay here." She pressed her hand into his solar plexus. "Don't you dare move! I'll be back in a moment, and I expect to find you in exactly the same position."
Just in case, she didn't bother looking for her mobile. Instead, she snatched her handbag from the shelf in his hall, pranced back to the bedroom, and climbed onto the bed next to him. He was obediently waiting, and Jackie lightly pecked his lips as a reward. It took some digging and pulling bits and bobs out, but she finally located the trilling gizmo.
"What's that?" he asked, while she was turning off all five alarms on her phone.
"What's what?" Jackie asked, without tearing her eyes off her mobile.
"That."
She locked the screen and finally looked at him - and the envelope from the fertility clinic in his hand.