Hayley
My allergy gets worse in the next two days. I haven't heard a word from Nick or Olive. Between visiting the doctors and taking care of myself, I called up Phil. I requested him to meet me and just hear me out. He agreed. I don't know what to say, but there's no going back now that he's sitting right in front of me.
"I'm sorry, Phil. I'm really sorry for what happened that day. I went there to confront him about being rude to you and then...... then" I swallow. "I didn't mean to hurt you, Phil."
He sighs." Everyone told me there was some kind of tension between the two of you but I think I just didn't want to see it."
"I don't know how I can explain it, Phil. But I do know that I wanted that date as much you did, I swear. And I know, that I wouldn't even dream of hurting you when you have been nothing but sweet and kind to me."
He gives a little smile. "I believe you, Hayley."
"I'm so so sorry, Phil."
"It's okay. And um sorry for the sunflowers."
"Don't be. It was really nice of you. " I give him a small smile and continue, "Do you forgive me?"
He nods.
"So we're good? Friends?"
He smiles. "Yes."
I light up. "Thank you so much, Phil. This really means a lot."
"It's okay, Hayley. And take care."
I nod.
At least I did one thing right.
~
I'm on my bed staring at the ceiling because I can't sleep. I squeeze my eyes shut.
“Find a voice that will quiet the others.”
“Love you? I would choke on my own spi-”
“I fall in love with you everytime you smile. I fall in love with you everytime you look into my ey-”
“No one will ever love that hopeless roma-”
“I would have my heart broken by you a million times than not having you in it even for a second.”
My eyes open wide. I found it! I found the voice. Nick. This is it. I jump out of my bed and run towards my closet. I don't even have the energy to eat but I need to do this. I take out a pair of joggers and my NYU sweatshirt and struggle to put them on. I leave in such a hurry that I forget to take my phone along. I drive to the office and rush into the elevator ignoring everyone on the way. This is it. He is it. I run out of the elevator towards the cabin but it's locked.
"Hayley?" Sam's voice comes from behind.
"Where is Nick?" I don't bother to turn around.
"Nick and Olive are in London. For the Ward's deal signing."
Now, I turn around. "Oh. Right. Um thanks, Sam. When are they coming back?"
"Tomorrow. You look really sick. Do you wan-"
"I'm sorry, Sam. I think I should head home. Really need some rest."
She smiles and nods. I rush home, calling Nick continuously on the way. He doesn't answer. It's okay. I deserve it. It's my turn to win his forgiveness.
When I reach home, I fall on the couch. I'm so tired, I can't even walk to my room. It feels like I'm in a oven . The sound of my phone ringing wakes me up. I open my eyes and bright sunshine reaches my eyes. I've been sleeping since 6:30 in the evening? Ugh.
I gather up the energy to walk to my room and take my phone. It's Olive. Finally!
"Hey Ol." I say softly while sitting on my bed.
"Why?" Olive asks sternly.
"Why what?" I ask.
"Really? Why did you do this to him?"
"Ol, it's complicated. I didn't wa-"
"Stop it! If you didn't love him you could have said it to his face. You didn't have to walk away from him and hurt him and insult his feelings like that!" She shouts.
"No. I swear oli-"
"No! Let me talk, Hayley. I've never seen him like this. He hasn't slept in days, he hasn't eaten anything. He's like a robot. He won't tell me what exactly happened. He won't even talk to me. What have you done, Hayley? I never- never in my worse state imagined you could do this. To him."
"Olive, let me just talk to him once. Please." I beg her.
"NO! I'm telling you Hayley. I'm sorry but just stay away from him for sometime. I don't want you to talk to him. I don't want you to even come in front of him. You talk to him when he's ready for it, when I tell you he's in the right state of mind to talk to you."
"Olive! You're my friend. Y- you know I won't hurt him intentionally!" I shout with all the energy I have left.
"I know, Hayley. But, Nick is my bestfriend. He wasn't like this even with Andres. We're staying here for a few more days so don't go to the office to find him. I'm requesting you, Hayley. Just back off till he gets better. Then I'll bring him to you myself."
"Oka-"
She hangs up.
I fall on the bed. I fucked it up. But I'm not going to stop till I make it right. I'll wait for him, however long it takes.
~
I recover well the next five days. Not well enough to go the office but at least to take a walk without tripping. I've been ignoring Lucy all these days. It is killing me but I can't tell her. Not until I make things right. I haven't heard a word from or about Nick or Olive in days.
I put on my activewear and walk towards the nearby park. My body goes numb when I see two people making out against a tree. The guy has brown hair, broad shoulders, long legs- they might have felt someone watching them as they suddenly stop and turn towards me.
No. It can't be. He can't be here.
Fuck. It is him. Dave. I turn around so fast I almost lose my balance but before I can start walking he calls me.
"Hayley!"
I can feel the tears forming in my eyes at his voice. I should walk away. No! I can't let him think I'm weak. No.
I slowly turn around.
"So it is you. I thought I was hallucinating." He says.
"Yeah. It's me. What are you doing here?" I ask dryly.
"Well, we are here for our first trip after marriage. This is Tia, my wife." He kisses her.
"Who's this?" Tia asks.
"This is Hayley. My ex."
"Oh." She smiles at me. "Listen baby, I'm gonna get some coffee. You both catch up."
"Okay Tia." They kiss and she leaves, waving me goodbye.
"Congrats on the wedding." I force a smile.
"Thanks. You seeing someone?"
"No." I look away.
He starts laughing. Like a huge loud laugh which makes some people even stare at us.
"What's funny?" I ask firmly.
"Nothing. It's just that I was right. I told you that you deserve to be alone and you told me I was an ass and I won't find anyone. And yet here we are, I'm happily married and you" he points at me "you are alone and lonely."
I beg my eyes to not let the tears out.
"Just a suggestion. If only you weren't too much and gave a lot more physically, maybe you would find someone." He grins evilly.
"Thanks Dave but you and your suggestion can fuck off." I turn on my heels and walk away.
"Don't forget I was right." He laughs from behind.
I run away but crash into something. Someone. I slowly look up to apologise when I see it- the face I've been longing to see since what feels like forever. Nick holds my arms and looks into my eyes.
There's anger and hurt in his eyes which are surrounded by dark circles. His hair is ruffled and messy. He looks......... heartbroken. And I'm the reason behind it. He looks away and clears his throat.
"Olive said you wanted to talk." He says as he slowly pushes me away from his chest.
" I - I - how are you?"
He doesn't answer me.
"I'm sorry, Nick. I didn't mean to hurt you. I jus-"
"But you did hurt me, Hayley. I am hurt not because you don't love me but because you walked away from me. You didn't even say it to my face. I told you I would have my heart broken by you a million times and I meant it but you didn't just break my heart by walking away. You insulted my feelings. You insulted me."
"Nick I swea-"
"Hayley, I opened up to you and you walked- no ran away from me." He runs a hand over his face.
" N-Nick, I - I - I - I - "
"You what?" He snaps.I flinch.
“Don't forget I was right.”Dave's laugh rings in my ears.
"I'm sorry." I turn around.
The tears start rolling down as I walk away. Again. I can't take it anymore. I need this to stop. I run into the nearest bar and order the most strong alcohol they have. I can't think of anything this moment. I've heard the hurt goes away with alcohol, temporarily but it does. I don't care if it doesn't suit me. I just need the hurt to go away. I drink and drink and drink. My throat burns. One shot. Two shots. Six shots. I'm about to take my seventh shot when two strong arms scoop me up.
"Hey hero! Leave me." I try to get down.
"Hey!" I move my hands over the man's arms.
"Waaaaaowww! You have such strong arms. Do you go to the gym? Do you diet or something? Do you lift people like this frequently? Do you have a lot of sex or something?" I blabber.
"I need you to shut up." He says as he puts me into his car.
"Are you kidnapping me?" I ask.
"I'm not kidnapping you, Hayley." He gets into the car.
I finally look at him. "Nick? Is it really you? Am in heaven?"
"I'm here, Hayley." He starts driving.
"Oooookkkkaaaaayyy." I sing.
I keep blabbering and singing, even jump sometimes on the way. He drives into a huge building and parks the car.
"Where are we?" I ask imitating a child.
He groans. "At my house."
I pout and nod slowly. He gets out and takes me in his arms again. He gets in the elevator and then walks into a penthouse.
"Woah. This is your house?"
"Yes." He walks into a bedroom, puts me on the bed and sits next to me.
"I'm going to get something for your hangover. Stay here till then. Okay?"
I nod and just when he turns around I stand up and start singing-no- shouting, "Beeefore you I only dated self-induuulgent takersss who only took out their problems on meeeeee-"
He spins around, his face blank as I jump on his bed and sing.
"Hayley stop you'll fall do-"
"And I've been loving you for quite some time, time, tiiiiiii-" I loose my balance and am about to fall down from the bed but Nick catches me. The tips of our noses touch. I laugh loudly and jump onto him making both of us fall on the floor. I slowly lift my head up and just stare at his face, studying his features- his deep brown eyes, his contoured structure, his perfectly perfect nose- GOD! I'm so drunk. Something flashes in his eyes but he doesn't let me see it. He looks away and starts to stand, lifting me with him.
"Hayley. I'm putting you to bed and I want you to stay there. Understand?" There's ice in his voice. I nod, then he tucks me under his soft blanket and turns to the door.
"No!" I hold his hand. "Don't go."
He sighs sadly.
"Fold your legs." I say ask I slowly get up.
He looks at me."Wh-"
"Please fold your legs."
He does so,his expression confused. I slowly crawl into his lap and wrap my arms around him placing my ear on his chest. I can hear his heart beating fast and loud.
"Why is your heart beating so fast?" I ask softly.
"Because of you." He whispers.
A tear rolls down my cheek.My heart breaks with the hurt in his voice. I sigh.
"I didn't walk away because of you or your confession. I walked away because of me."
"What?" He asks with concern in his voice.
Another tear rolls down. "I'm scared, Nick. I'm so fucking scared." My voice breaks.
He slowly strokes my hair. "What are you scared of Moon?"
"Of losing you." I whisper under my breath.
"You'll never lose me, Moon." His voice is so soft I'll melt.
"I will!" I laugh but it's humourless.
"I will lose you.What Dave said is true, Nick. I'll lose you and every man who'll ever come into my life. "
"Wha- who is Dave?" There's a hint of anger in his voice.