On the second day of hell, I woke up at 10 a.m., an hour later than Cleo always did to wake up the children. As I sat up, I realized that Melanie had already made herself comfortable in my bed.
I sighed and gently shook her awake, "Time to get up, lovely."
"No."
"I know, but we have to get up and...start our day." I told her, my eyes pleading to fall back asleep.
"No," she said again.
"Sit up, lovely, come here."
She did as I said, although very lazily. Her head slammed into my lap.
I sighed, running my fingers through her hair, trying to wake myself up.
"Let's get up, now."
I sat her up and picked her up, her head pressing against my chest. I had to hold her with strong arms, it seemed like she was getting heavier each day. The thing that was the most horrible is that I never knew when would be the last time I'd get to hold her.
I stood up and took her to the bathroom, brushing both of our hair, as well as our teeth. Then I headed to the nursery. I put Melanie on the green cushioned chair in the corner as I got Theo up, who was a very good sleeper.
Once we all got past the sleepy morning stage and into playtime, I was sure everything would start to run smoother.
"Sweetheart," I gently brushed a hand over his cheek.
He was cuddled under a thin blanket in his crib, his face stuffed in his shabby, periwinkle rabbit plush.
I wasn't sure why the fabric of the stuffed animal was so shabby, he'd had it since he was five months old, it wasn't that aged.
His eyes slowly fluttered open, and he peered up at me with no movement from his head.
"There's my little angel,"
He cooed, smiling as he quickly stood up and sloppily grasped the wooden frame of his crib.
With a small grunt, I scooped him up, along with his rabbit, giving him a small kiss on the cheek.
I had to do a diaper change, and then we all went downstairs. It was never a thrilling experience in the morning.
"Mommy!" Melanie tugged on my sweatpants as I went down the stairs, Theo slobbering over my shoulder.
"Hands on the railing, Mel." I reminded her.
She did as I said. "Mommy!"
"Yes?"
"Mama?"
"She's not here, lovely. She'll be back home soon."
"Soon?"
"Two more days."
She just huffed.
I clipped Theo into his little swing by the kitchen counter and stifled a sigh.
She tilted her head at me as I knelt down to her level. I put up my fingers, "We have all of today," I put one finger down, "and then Mama will be back tomorrow night. When it's dark outside."
Her eyes widened.
"Tomorrow night," I said.
"Nighttime." She repeated quietly.
Close enough.
I gave her a small head pat and stood back up. At least the perks of being in my early twenties while being a parent meant that my bones were still mostly in shape to do crazy shit with them.
I still needed to go grocery shopping, but usually I could just leave the children home with Cleo. It wasn't an option now, and I wasn't sure how I'd handle them both.
I leaned on the counter, "What to do," I muttered to myself.
Calling Faris was an option, but there was a chance they wouldn't be available.
Whatever, I had to take my chances.
I quickly took out my phone from my pocket and tapped on their contact, then the call button. Hesitantly, because of my social and apparently phone-call anxiety, I put it up to my ear and waited as the phone rang.
"Yes, Ms. True?"
I tried to hide the shakiness in my voice as I spoke, "Hey, how are you doing?"
"I-I am okay..." They answered.
"That's great. Are...you available now? I'm sorry it's short notice."
"Of course I am," I could hear the smile in their voice.
"Great, could you be here in ten minutes?"
"Yes, ma'am!"
"Thank you, Faris, you're a lifesaver." I smiled into the phone.
"See you then!" They said happily.
I hung up as quickly as possible.
"All right, you two." I turned back to them.
Theo was happily swinging with not a care in the world, but Melanie had been staring at me the whole time.
"Faris will be home while Mommy goes shopping, okay?"
Melanie clung to my leg, hopping happily. "Faris!"
I smiled, "Mommy won't be gone long, okay? Just for a little while."
I was hoping she understood most of what I was saying.
"Okay, Mommy! Okay!"
It had been less than ten minutes when I heard a knock on the door.
"Sorry I am early!" They said, signing as I opened the door.
"It's okay! Thank you for being here."
They nodded as I welcomed them inside.
"If you could feed Theo while I'm gone that would be great," I told them. They nodded again, sliding their shoes off.
"I just need to go to the store, I should be back in around thirty minutes. Melanie might get a little fussy since she hasn't eaten,"
"Nothing I can't handle!" They exclaimed with a big smile, their hands still running.
"Thank you, again, and please help yourself to anything you'd like. You know that by now, I'm sure." I smiled back.
They answered with a head bob, before quickly going over to the children.
Over my pajama top, I slipped on a jacket and my green Converse. I'll admit, I looked more like a closeted fifteen-year-old than a parent, but I had to pick my battles.
The grocery store was nothing thrilling, as much as Melanie liked to say it was. I was grabbing food off shelves looking a little bit like a hot mess, but I think when other parents, specifically moms, realized you were one, too, there was no judgment.
On my mental list was fruit, berries especially, and not bananas, because Melanie hated them. Bread and turkey slices, because she liked cheese and turkey sandwiches, cut into stars with cute little cookie cutters. I'd eat the excess, so I was fine with it. I got bacon, avocados, eggs, cheese sticks, spaghetti noodles, and butter.
Lots of butter. We lived in a house practically made of butter. Butter and blood. The peanut kind of butter, too.
I grabbed a pack of pancake mix too, which just made me want to also go on a relapse around the breakfast aisles. I'd soon convinced myself Nutella and syrup were necessities.
And she'd begged me for more bunny cheese crackers, so I just added that to the list. Because I was a pushover, mostly.
I also grabbed a pack of granola bars, because Melanie didn't know it, but those were going to be her new car snack.
I was home in around thirty minutes, and as expected, she rushed to the door. Faris and Theo were playing in the living room.
"Mommy! Mommy!"
"I know, lovely, I've got breakfast."
I could've taken her out to breakfast, but I wasn't going to leave Theo alone, babysitter or not.
We'd do it another day, I would have to make it a thing, going out to eat, just her and I.
"Yum yums!" She cried, hopping up onto the barstools with only a little push from me.
Faris got up from their spot on the floor, and Theo slowly teetered behind them.
"Thank you, again." I told them.
They nodded, "Of course."
"Also, have you been teaching them sign language?" I asked as I began to unload the groceries.
"O-oh, yes, I hope that's not a problem. Just a little bit."
I looked back at them, worry stroked my face. "No, no. Please continue, it's making a difference and I find it quite helpful."
They nodded with a warm, apologetic smile.
"Would you like me to pay you more for that?"
"N-No, please! You don't have to!"
"Ah, we'll see," I smiled down towards the bags as I took the food out of them all.
Faris made their leave shortly after our conversation, and I'd started to make bacon.
It was simple, it was something Melanie hadn't tried, and I hadn't either. I popped some bread into the toaster and spread butter on it, then topped it with bacon and a little bit of shredded cheese.
Melanie took hers apart, eating it piece by piece. While I ate it as if it was a regular piece of toast.
For the rest of the day, we did nothing but sit around and watch TV. I wasn't proud of it, but I think all of us felt off.
Theo fell asleep on my lap in the middle of the afternoon, which made me realize I'd forgotten to put both of them down for their naps. It was yet another reminder that functioning without my girlfriend was something that was just not possible for me. And my heart was tugged on again, getting played like a fiddle.
"Mommy," Melanie whispered as I put her in her crib.
"Yes, lovely?"
"I want ice! Ice!"
She'd been obsessed with ice. Our ice maker formed the stuff into little spheres, and to be honest, I liked chomping on it, too, but Melanie treated it as if it was a dessert made by a world class chef.
"You can have ice when you wake up, Mel."
Reluctantly, she nodded and obediently went off to sleep, sucking her thumb like always.
Theo was trickier, he could be easily waked. If he woke up during his sleep, it was nearly impossible to get him to stop crying.
I managed to do it this time, and even unconsciously, he still clung onto that old bunny.
While they were asleep, I attempted to call Cleo again, back on the sofa. The line kept ringing.
She'd told me to call if I needed anything.
And I needed to hear her voice.
But the line kept ringing, until ultimately dying out.
I groaned, trying not to cry. Her not answering could mean so many things.
I called again. And again, no luck.
I texted instead, and got no text back.
What was I supposed to do? It wasn't like she was on a plane. She was probably just having fun. Three days filled with fun with Emient and his minions.
"Cleo!" I whispered.
My thumb hovered over the call button.
I turned my phone off, tossing it to the side. It was so quiet I could hear it hit the soft cushions.
I put my hands over my face, leaning back so far into the sofa I thought it would tip.
What was I supposed to do without her?
I stayed there for minutes. Until my phone rang.
As quickly as I'd started panicking, I picked it up. Her contact was up. She was calling me back.
I let out a large sigh of relief, quickly sliding the bar to answer.
"Cleo!" I put the phone up to my ear.
"Hello, babydoll,"
She still had that little sleepy rasp in her voice, even over the phone.
"What-what are you doing?"
"I was about to go to sleep, actually."
"Oh, I'm sorry."
She snorted.
"It's fine. You keep me up at home, too. It's as if nothing's changed."
It felt like everything had changed while she wasn't around.
"Are you having fun?" I asked, my voice shaking.
"Fun isn't the right word when you're spending time with Emient." Her voice droned in response.
She quickly changed the subject. "Have you been crying?"
I paused. She could tell just from my voice?
"Y-you didn't answer..."
"I'm sorry, babydoll."
I lowered my voice. "It's okay, I just wish you were here."
"I wish I was with you, too."
I cleared my throat, "Don't you like it? Back in Denmark?"
"I wish I was here under better circumstances." She replied. "But...it is nice, I suppose."
I smiled, becoming amused, "Does Emient know Danish?"
She snorted again, "He does. Although it's quite obvious he's started learning just recently.
He probably won't let me sleep, anyway. He'll tell me about old vampire laws, and how we didn't used to sleep. How I shouldn't now, either."
"Oh...well I'll let you sleep when you come home," I replied with a smile in my voice, "what does he want with you, anyway?"
"I'll tell you when I get back. It's a lot to explain. But I promise, I will explain it all,"
I nodded, before realizing she couldn't see it. "Okay."
She sighed, as if in a dream. "I'm glad I get to hear your voice." She husked.
I could picture her lying in bed, her eyes closed, sleepy and content.
"Me too." I whispered a reply.
Her voice suddenly perked up, "Oh, and send me something to keep me entertained, yes?"
I blushed.
"Y-you mean like-?"
"You know exactly what I mean, Marine."
"God, we're not in high school, Cleo." I hissed.
"Gives me an excuse to not send them around."
"Excuse?!"
She laughed quietly. "Just think about it."
I subconsciously began to bite my lip.
"Oh, I don't need to think about it."
She scoffed, "I'll talk to you later, babydoll,"
I sighed, "Okay,"
"I love you."
"I...love you more." I answered.
"I love you most."
A second passed after her sentence, and then the line disconnected.
A sudden blush filled my cheeks.
At least I had something to do to keep me busy.