Sitting quietly in the car, I run my hand through my hair as I wait impatiently for him to finish up with the receptionist. My stomach was in knots from the stress and I'd be lying if I didn't say I was mildly worried about the impact on the life growing inside me. Lifting my phone, for a few quiet moments,I contemplate calling the children but I need a more solid plan before I involve them in this.
What had Verando said? I'd be trading out with Rowan...
My hand slides down my body, slowly moving to cup over my stomach as I prop my elbow up on the ledge of the door and stare back at the exhausted expression watching me.
Slowly, my mind was coming to terms with the idea that he would have to go with someone else to train for this ability. There were things I could do, but I was reaching my limit. A different version of me, one that was less selfish perhaps, would have been a better candidate than my current self. The cuff glints back at me, taunting me with the decision to go forward with bringing a life into this world.
I was racked with the relentless guilt that it was easier to pass him off. I was tired.
So damn tired.
My body felt as though it weighed as much as the very car I sat in. My stomach rolled and twisted, making me wonder if I was about to be nauseous or just hungry. The circles under my eyes did little for any hope of being found even mildly attractive, how did I go from a night of unbridled passion to feeling like a street urchin?
With a chuckle, I pinch the bridge of my nose. Why did I care if he found me attractive? We'd seen each other soaked in blood and mud, grit and grime, beaten and battered. Yet here I was, plucking absently to highlight any semblance of structure under the heavy sweater.
Shifting awkwardly in my clothes, pulling myself together as I see him approaching though it takes no effort to see that he'd noticed my state. The concern creases the corner of his mouth but he says nothing. Climbing into the car, Verando turns on the engine and I try not to key in on the stillness in his body.
While he still had his own scent, it was muddied with the vacancy of potent blood and life. Would it eventually disappear entirely?
My husband really did die that night, the person sitting beside me was the remnant of that raging desire to live.
We'd survived through so much, unable to be stopped even when the gods themselves willed it, but in the end, I remained as his weakness. When I finally allow myself to glance up, I find that he's watching me, concerned as his eyes scan over every inch of my somber expression.
"I'm fine. Just a miscalculation of the job, I suppose." His tone is low and soft. It was easier to explain away the moment of weakness, even to me, he did not like to be vulnerable. This was uncharted territory, magic, and its uses had never been a friend to him. I recall at one point, he'd wanted so badly to be human. Now, he was even further from that.
"Are you alright?"
I can't help but scoff. "I'm a bit of an emotional mess," I admit.
I earn my favorite expression, dimpling his cheek. "Pregnancy will do that to you beyond the shit show that is this series of events. You hardly ate, I imagine you're famished."
We'd gotten good at taking care of each other.
While I was hungry, more than anything I was an inferno. My body had finally accepted that it was changing, so it'd decided the next course of action was to boil me alive. "Can I have your hand?" I managed finally, for all I wanted at this point was to cool down.
Offering me his palm, I cup the back of his hand to press the cold digits into the flesh of my cheek with a welcomed sigh of relief.
Leaning into the smoothness of his hand, I could almost melt here, surely I was steaming from the amount of heat I was putting off. "There are plus's and minus's. This is definitely a plus." I tell him with a small smile, "Now I see why you liked me so much in the beginning, I could cool you down. I remember thinking you felt like the sun itself with how hot you were."
"So you found me attractive?" He muses, half-hearted as he strokes my cheek with the pad of his thumb. When had his hands become so smooth? I remember how calloused they used to be, that it almost startled me when I was used to such a soft touch. "I didn't really think about it, though I did enjoy that you sought me out for warmth. My reputation was terrible, I wasn't someone that anyone found comfort in, in that regard."
"I'm sure the trail of panties you left in your wake would disagree," I grumble, flushing at the comment as soon as it left my lips. I'd succeeded in making him chuckle as I kissed his palm apologetically.
We pull out of the lot and I collect his hand into mine, holding it in my lap. Should I bring up the morgue again? Should I ask to see his book?
"You and I both seem to understand some people don't require much to engage in sexual warfare." He challenges, making me grit my teeth with just how fast the car accelerated down the street. If I was going to make him a new vehicle, it would have to be something that could stand up to this beating. "We're going to head to a tavern near here, it'll be a good place to get you some breakfast while we wait for Tomas and Rowan to come meet us. "
So he'd already stepped ahead of me, he wanted to go forward with sending me back and taking Rowan to figure this out?
I'd accepted it, I was actually alright with it, but hearing it out loud made my breath hitch.
"Please don't cry, love." His voice brings me out of the free fall into the depths of my own darkness. What if he didn't come back?
Wiping at my eyes quickly, I confirm that my hands are dry and take a sharp breath. I was a King, not a child, not a damsel in distress. "No, I'm alright. I-" Swallowing, I lean back into the seat as I stare up towards the dark roof of the quick-moving car. It was easier than watching the road than thinking about careening down the highway.
"This ride doesn't end. I'm mourning that, your retirement, our quiet life together... If I want this-" Placing my hand over my stomach once more, it feels cruel to compare the two, but I had to be realistic. "If I want to do this, then I have to acknowledge it's not just me anymore. It's different, the boys would manage just fine if not becoming a whole new level of spoiled.. but this baby.."
Until it was out of me, I had to protect it, and even beyond that I felt a sense of urgency to protect this life. The speed of the car, the reality of our situation, everything felt like a weight trying to shift the scale out of my favor. If I wanted to shift it back, I had to make a change and that was going to where I could be safe. "Besides, we need someone to run our household if you're going to be gallivanting around."
"Gallivanting, hmm?" he questions, cocking an eyebrow at me.
"Yes. Mmm." I retort, imitating his normal sound of thoughtful consideration. "If you're going to make an honest woman out of me, I might as well play the part. The children won't survive long in our kingdom if they keep acting as they are, gods, I thought that Xaiver would meet his death with that last outburst." The thought makes me clutch his hand, and I peer at him once more, examining his expression which he'd opted to hide from me with his calculated warlord stillness.
"Would you ever... hit.. our children?"
Verando considers this, squeezing the steering wheel as he tongues his cheek in mild annoyance. "Do you think that I would?"
"Yes." The tone is hard, without emotion, I had to be honest.
"Fair." He accepts, squaring his shoulders while this thumb carefully brushes over my knuckles. "I think there's a time where I might have, I was no stranger to the lash when I was a child. My mother never raised a hand to me, but my father obviously did. Do you remember our time with Naptalion? When I explained to you about how we interrogated men in the Mafia?"
Nodding, I shudder at the thought of the man's burned teeth from my husband's ring.
"The problem with torture is you never know when someone's telling the truth. Fear makes a man do odd things, if violence worked in that regard we wouldn't have men committing acts that resulted in public execution or hands lopped off, now would we?"
"Says the man who conquered a country." I muse, though his words did bring me a small sense of relief. The answer was no, and in that, I believed him.
Frowning, Verando settles his lips into a thin line as we pull into the parking lot of the tavern. For a moment, I wonder if he might retort with something sharp, but in the end, he opts to let it go as he exits the car to walk over to my door, opening it for me and offering his hand to help me out. "Don't worry, when they're teenagers you'll be begging me to right them and I'll gladly step in for a small fee."
"A fee?" I question, smirking as his arm slips around my waist to pull me to his side. His body feels hard, cold against mine. Bending, he captures my lips with his own and I sigh against that sinful mouth as I kiss him back. "But sir, I'm just a poor housewife with no money of my own. How would I ever pay you?" I plead lightly, flashing him a sultry grin as he sets his jaw in restraint.
"Get inside before I regret giving you back." His lips against my ear, his voice rough, I shiver and can't help but giggle as he smacks my ass while sending me into the tavern. Inside the building, I note that it's the same stillness that Verando himself held.
My breath feels cold, my body chilled as I wrap my arms around myself and hear the low growl of my husband behind me. My eyes lock on the man before us, sitting at one of the tables quietly eating while the bartender is slumped over the counter, hand still outstretched.
Anubis glances up, his dark skin and gold eyes a beacon in the stillness and dim lighting.
"Found yourself a vessel, I see." Verando snaps, stepping to get in front of me.
"You're already working, I was impressed until I checked your submissions. A couple of missed marks, I'd say." He dabs at his mouth with a paper towel with a sigh. "This is the first breakfast I've gotten in over five hundred years..for that, it's worth a few mistakes. I'd forgotten how much I enjoy human food."
Flicking his hand, the chairs across from him slide out. "Don't be rude, sit."
Before I can blink, we're drug across the room by some unknown force. I grunt as my body hits the seat, Verando sits beside me as if we were tethered together, his hand remains in my lap and those light eyes never leave the man before us.
Anubis smirks, taking another bite of pancake. "I'm your boss. Maybe look at me with less malice." He suggests, taking a sip of his drink. "You haven't opened your book yet." His eyes lock on my husband and Verando audibly grinds his teeth. I note the look of frustration growing in the god before us, he drops his fork and folds his hands. "Do I need to remind you that we have a deal? One day of good deeds does not a Death make. You have a responsibility far beyond a few small mortals meant to die."
"I'm taking care of Nic first." Verando snaps, only to make Anubis smirk slightly as he reaches into his pocket to produce a whistle.
"See this? You might belong to the Unicorn in the sense that you're a hellhound for him, but you are my Death. I need to trust that when I give you a command you are going to do it. When I tell you something as simple as read your damn book, you will do it. Or can someone of your low breeding not read?"
Verando stands and Anubis slides his thumb off the receiver of the whistle.
As fast as he can perform the task, Verando drops to the floor on his knees, hands over his ears with a cry of discomfort.
"What're you doing?" I demand swiftly, moving to get up only to be slammed back into my chair.
"Teaching a dog to obey his master. My dogs aren't allowed to bark back at me."
It was almost like watching the man be consumed in agony, the way he curls into himself, the desperation to stop whatever the whistle was doing to him. It'd taken his breath away, causing a light drip of blood to run from his nose as Anubis covered the receiver over with his thumb once more. "Finished?" He demands.
Verando flashes his teeth as he climbs to his hands and knees, panting, before slumping onto his hip and dabbing at the blood with the back of his hand. "Neat trick..."
"I'm quite familiar with the weakness of a dog. I don't wish to make enemies, but I need to be able to trust you. Doing things I ask of you, like reading your damned book, will aid in that process." Flicking his eyes towards me, Anubis looks me up and down with quiet regard. "Odd that you've mated like a god even when you weren't one. Many of us prefer male partners, very curious indeed. You're quite attractive, perhaps one day you'll grow bored of monogamy and step into the adventurous side of purgatory."
My lips part in offense but I quickly lift my hand to still my husband who appears to be choosing violence instead of sense. "I've seen enough of that lifestyle to know that it isn't for us. But thank you for the compliment." I retort calmly, knowing that more than anything, we needed to play the game correctly.
Anubis seems amused by this, gesturing for Verando to get up as he climbs back into his chair. "I like him. He gets it." He considers me once more, "Bast would be very angry if she knew I was sitting with you. Cats and dogs." He shrugs with a smirk, before folding his hands in his lap. "It's come to my understanding that you're going to need some training, I figured someone who lived among magic users and could shapeshift would be more capable but it appears you're a bit of a one trick pony. It's embarrassing, frankly. So, I'd like to take you with me-"
"No!" I blurt out, making them both look at me in surprise. I couldn't let him go, I couldn't risk this man damaging my husband any further. I couldn't comprehend Verando becoming stuck in a place where I could no longer reach him. "We have a plan, we are going to get him trained. Just give us some more time."
"We were in the middle of these arrangements when you so rudely interrupted." Verando snaps, making me elbow him in the ribs though I'm sure it hurt me more than it hurt him with his stone-like body. "If you think I'm a pain in the ass in short doses, you'd be horrified by my company long-term."
The words come off much more as a threat than a simple statement. I knew he was being protective of me, that he was on edge, but I found myself wishing I had a bit more of my tactful husband and less of my vicious protector.
"I like a challenge." Anubis shrugs, though he seems to be mulling over my statement. "How much time do you want? There's a train I need to be derailed in two weeks... all you have to do is be on it with your ability 'on'. Think you can manage that?"
"You want me to kill a train full of people?" Verando looks taken aback, making Anubis frown.
"No, Mr.Mercer. I want you to do your job. The train is going to derail with or without you, so it is written in the scrolls. You can either track down every mangled soul of those taken or you can be present and collect them accordingly. Your being there keeps a wraith from swooping in and devouring everything in sight. But if you're not 'on', then mistakes happen and people end up in the wrong places. Do I make myself clear?"
"Crystal." I cut in, placing my hand on Verando's thigh.
"Maybe I picked the wrong person.. too bad Bast already laid her claim. I'll check in in a week, I've got a quota to fulfill. If you read your book, you'd know how to conjure the scrolls. I need you in top form, for there are some long-standing players on this board that need to be put back where they belong. If we're going to make moves, I need a knight who can do his job." Standing, he brushes himself off, I spy that he's wearing a suit.
"Good to know your true intention to gain control through your ability." Verando sounds resigned, at least we had confirmation that Anubis intended to do what he needed to do to ensure his time here was secured.
The god adjusts his cuffs, rebuttoning his coat. "Everyone must answer to someone, many gods and greater beings have come to earth with little intention of doing anything but destroying. Are there good people who die? Absolutely, oftentimes it won't seem fair.. but just obey the list. Today's marauder becomes tomorrow's bounty hunter. It's our job to set the scales straight, the world is out of balance.. you both understand that better than any other mortals. I can't promise you freedom, this contract is forever. But, I can promise you that this work will create a safer world for your children.
As a god, and as a father, I can assume you want that just as much as I do." Anubis regards us both before snapping his fingers. The bartender leaps up with a gasp, clutching his throat as he pants. When I blink, I note that the god is gone.
"Lunatic." Verando spits, rubbing his temple.
The words Anubis spoke felt as much for me as they were for Verando. Maybe Anubis knew that Verando was the physical hammer when it came to tasks such as these, but when it came to seeing through the mayhem, sometimes he could be sidetracked by his own sense of morality. The prewritten destiny was a hard concept to wrap my mind around, yet I'd faced it before with my father's own future sight.
How far did the book go? Would we be able to look at our own deaths? Did I want to know? Shuddering, I place my hand on his bicep, feeling nauseous all over again. "I think we need to go through your book before you send me back with Tomas."