Aaron Hendrix
"You fucking fat ass get off of me" I hiss when I wake up and realize Owen is fucking laying on top of me.
He just huffs and has the audacity to turn and nestle into me.
That's it.
I get up, sending him to the floor, and look around the room to try and figure out what happened the night before. I remember being stressed out about Addie, then drinking a shit ton of beer.
"What the hell man!" Owen sits up on the floor and rubs his head, his dirty blonde hair in a rats nest.
"Don't try and cuddle me, then. Gay ass motherfu-
"Nuh uh- you can't say that. It's 2023 you are going to get cancelled." He points at me, then puts his hand on his chest, "It really hurt my feelings."
I roll my eyes, "Again, don't fucking cuddle me then."
He frowns and gets to his feet, "Well, happy wedding day to a very grumpy groom." He says, dusting himself off and sighing.
"Why did we even share a bed?" I ask him.
"You wouldn't stop whining about how Adelina is being weird and saying you can't sleep alone, so you begged me to come stay in here."
Did I really?
"Fuck" I mutter when I remember why I had been so upset last night.
Something is wrong with Addie, and I have no fucking idea what it could be apart from that she doesn't want to marry me.
When I saw her the day I flew in from Athens she could barely look me in the eye and her knee was bouncing like crazy the entire drive. We spent that day at the beach with my family, and even then I barely got time with her since everyone was there.
I just assumed it was nerves about the wedding and that it would fade, but last night before I left her I could see the same look in her eyes- doubt.
Fuck.
"What even happened with Lina?" Owen asks and I just shake my head. I am not in the mood to talk to him about this.
"Oh come on, I'm friends with her too. I can help."
I stare at him for a little bit, then decide what the hell.
"Something is wrong with her and I don't know what." I say, unable to look at Owen. I've never been one to discuss my relationships or feelings with people, and I do not need him to be making sympathetic faces at my issues.
Instead, he laughs.
Why the fuck is he laughing?
"Woah, relax" He says when I turn to him, about to rip his damn face off for thinking this is some kind of a joke.
"You made me think something was actually wrong." He says, "This is easy."
"Easy?" I question.
He nods, "I mean how bad could her issue be? She obviously wants to marry you and it's not like she cheated or anything. What else is there besides cold feet?"
"Cold feet." I repeat his words, my heart aching at the thought. Cold feet meaning doubts about marrying me.
"Yes, you can stop repeating what I say now. Stop stressing you will be fine. Talk to her before the wedding if you're that upset. I think it's a dumb thing to worry over, especially on the day that's supposed to be the best of your life right?" He tells me.
"If she doesn't want to marry you, you'll find out pretty soon, so you may as well try to have a good day until that happens."
"Until that happens? What are you-
"Not that it will...but I'm just saying either relax and forget about it or talk to her."
I frown at this, but nod. I will try and speak with her when I get back to the villa. Our service isn't until five, so I can talk to her around two before we have to separate and get ready.
Fucking hell I am nervous.
What if she changed her mind?
Why else would she be acting so weird?
Stop thinking.
I leave the room and walk into the restroom and decide to take a shower and try to clear my head, turning the water on the hottest setting and undressing. Looking up, I see myself in the mirror and my eyes land on the scars coating my chest.
I close my eyes, remembering the countless times my father has told me that my future was with a woman of his choosing who I could have a son to pass down the business to. That's it.
Nobody would ever love you, suck it up.
I let out a deep sigh and get into the shower, reminding myself this was to get rid of my thoughts.
I'm not really religious- I mean I believe in God and all- but I've always thought that's it. He knows we are chill, I've not been one to pray or go to church. But with Addie, I always catch her reading her Bible or inviting me to church or praying before bed.
So for the hell of it, I send a prayer to God that Adelina still wants to marry me.
I don't know what I would do if she didn't.
------
"Thank you so much!" Adelina waves goodbye to my sister and cousins as they drive away and wave to her. "We are picking you up at two so be ready!" Bella shouts out the window.
Once their car is well gone, Adelina and I stay standing outside.
My heart feels like it is going to fall out of my chest.
I see Adelina nervously play with a hair tie around her wrist, making my own nerves skyrocket.
Fuck.
I am not built for this kind of stress.
I am about to speak but she beats me to it, "Can we talk?" She says.
No.
Instead I nod, "Inside?" I ask. She nods now, giving me a small smile and leading me into the villa.
I watch as she turns to me, unable to look at me in the eyes, and takes a breath.
"Hi" she finally says, giving me a small smile that sends little bits of relief through my body. She's smiling. That's good.
"I've been thinking a lot..." She trails off and any relief I had moments prior vanishes.
This is where she tells me she isn't ready and calls it off.
Fuck me.
"Can we um...I'm sorry" she shakes her head, her face flushed with almost embarrassment.
"I—" she cuts herself off, looking lost for words.
I brace myself.
"I'm a little—very small-ly— nervous to um...have sex?" She says, almost like it's a question.
That is what this is about?
I don't mean to smile, I really don't, but I can't stop myself.
"Why are you..." I wrap her in my arms, slightly lifting her feet from the ground and feeling as she warily hugs me back.
"I thought you were calling it off." I tell her, every bone in my body feeling the surges of relief that her words brought me.
Not relief, I mean I am of course worried about her and her nerves. "No—of course not" she says, "Never. Don't even worry about that Ronny" she puts her hands on my face and gives me a kiss.
"Why are you nervous?" I ask her, setting her down and looking into her big brown eyes for an answer.
I can tell she's embarrassed about this, and it kills me. Does she not think she can talk to me?
"Because of him?" I say when she doesn't answer me.
She looks to the floor.
"Hey," I say as gently as I can, but I suddenly have the urge to fly back home and torture someone until he dies a slow miserable death.
Yeah, I have kept him alive in a basement for the past year. I don't need him dead and no longer suffering, he needs to be there wishing for death.
"I would never make you do anything, Addie" I say to her, "I'm just so fucking happy you still want to marry me" I kiss her forehead. "And you can always talk to me you know. Don't feel like you owe me anything. If you aren't ready we don't have to do anything."
She nods slowly, giving me a small smile before standing on her tip toes and pecking my lips, one hand on my cheek. I can see her eyes lighten like a weight has been lifted off of her shoulders.
I can't believe this is what she has been worried about for the past few days. Stressing her pretty little mind over wether I would be upset with her.
"How was your bachelor party?" She asks me, her hand lingering on me and sending sparks all over my body at the simple touch.
"Fine. Woke up with Owen all over me, though."
She laughs at that, "What'd you do?"
I shrug, "Went out then went to the beach for a while. You?"
Her eyes light up at me mentioning her party, and I love how much fun she seems to have had. "It was amazing. They got us a private chef and we swam at the beach then watched freaking Tangled on beanbags on the sand." She rants about her night and a small smile comes on my mouth before I can stop it.
God I love her.
"I should go get my things together" she then says, trailing her hand down from my face to my chest.
"Don't be late." She tells me, and I make an offended face, "When am I ever late?" I say back.
She shrugs, "I don't know, but you better not be. Oh also did you get your reception outfit?"
I nod and she smiles then disappears into the bedroom.
And I feel better.
Somewhat.
I feel like I should be upset or disappointed that she doesn't want to be with me like that, but I genuinely don't.
She is the most beautiful, kind, loving woman I have ever met and if I had to go my whole life with her without sleeping with her I would be grateful I got to be with her at all.
It does kill me that she carries the weight of what happened to her.
When we get home I will talk to her about speaking with someone about it maybe. I have several good therapist friends she could talk to—if she was open to it of course.
For now, I am going to marry the perfect woman I have somehow managed to make want to marry me too.
1730 words