"Why can't I let go of you?"
(Quick warning, this is inspired by a scene in ep 61! (If I'm correct) and does not affect anyone in my stories)
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Ashlyn's pov
I bolt upright on my bed, tears streaming down my cheeks as I look around while trying to calm my breathing. I wipe my tears and lay back down, staring up at the ceiling since I was unable to sleep.
A few minutes passed and I finally stopped crying, or so I thought; no matter how many times I try making myself stop, I just can't, it hit me like a brick and it wasn't expected by anyone. Flashbacks of us were running through my head, thinking on what I could've done better, or improved on; small flashes from that dream kept coming to mind, but a specific part really caught my eye.
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*"Where am I?"* I asked myself, looking around. I notice I'm in a room like place but everything is a glowy white. I walk and walk but can't find a way out, until, I see a door. I run towards it but stop in my tracks when I see someone I never expected to be there, Aiden. We stared into each other's eyes, a small smile on his sweet face, that face that I miss oh so much; meanwhile I was unable to move or speak. With tears starting to well up in my eyes I ran up to him and hugged him tightly. He hugged me back, rubbing my back a bit while doing so. All that could be heard in that moment was my shaky sobs and his words of comfort. "It's okay, I'm here now.." he said as I nuzzled into him more, my shaky hands grasping tightly onto the back of his hoodie. "Why... Why did you do that... you idiot.." I say, grasping even harder on him; he just held me tightly, his hand on the back of my head while the other was rubbing my back, not saying a word. We stayed in each other's embrace for a good amount of time, taking in every moment I had left with him. It was peaceful, of course I couldn't stop sobbing, but it just added more emotion and meaning to the moment. He was whispering sweet nothing's into my ear, which made it even better.
As time passed I heard him speak again in that beautiful voice of his for the last time ever.
"I'm okay..."
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I snapped back to reality from that sweet moment that I wish would last forever. Tears ran down my cheeks uncontrollably, my breathing became shaky and I couldn't stop it. I broke our into sobs, wondering...
Why can't I let go of you...?
I looked at my phone's time, 2am.. the wallpaper made me want to sob more, it consisted of a photo of everyone in the friend group, including Aiden.
I realized how much he changed me as a person, how much they all did. I'm so fucking lucky to be able to have them in my life, even if they left.
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I smiled lightly at that thought, knowing that all I said there was true and always will be. I wipe my tears and stand up, setting the rose on the grave, "I'll see you soon Aiden, take care. I love you." Were my words as I started getting ready to leave.
(A/N)
(This is making me sob so hard right now. Anyways here a hurt no comfort because I'm feeling a bit angsty <3)