Author's pov:
Zuri was recording Jessie in Central Park for a video message to Jessie's "friend", Darla.
"Hey, Darla. It's Jessie! Thank you so much for sending me that video of you cruising around Europe with your rich new boyfriend. If you consider a guy in his 60's 'new'," Jessie said before chuckling.
Zuri closed the camcorder.
"Don't get butter. Keep it upbeat," Zuri reminded her before she started recording again.
"So I thought I'd make a video for you about how awesome my life is here in the Big Apple," Jessie continued before walking over to Bertram. "Look who it is. Bertram. He's our butler, he caters to our every whim. Bertram, say hi to Darla."
Bertram smiled before he coldly said "Go away."
Jessie took a few steps away from Bertram.
"New Yorkers may seem a little bit crusty, but once you get to know them, they can be the sweetest people in the world."
Suddenly, Mrs. Chesterfield angrily stomped over to Jessie.
"Bessie!" she yelled. "My Zeus is missing! Probably dog-napped by your revolting little delinquents!"
"Please!" Jessie scoffed. "My kids would never go near that rat with hair extensions!"
"I wouldn't bet on that," Zuri said.
Jessie and Mrs. Chesterfield looked over to find Ravi holding Zeus while Luke was spinning him on the merri-go-round. Natasha and Emma were sitting in the middle of it.
"Faster! Faster!" Ravi yelled.
"Slower! Slower!" Jessie yelled.
"Stop! Stop!" Mrs. Chesterfield pleaded.
Suddenly, the merri-go-round stopped and Zeus flew out of Ravi's arms, resulting in Bertram catching him.
"Excuse me! This dog is under-cooked and overdressed," Bertram said as Mrs. Chesterfield ran over and took him.
"Zeusie! Oh! Are you all right? Oh, Bertram, how can I ever thank you for saving my precious little muchacho?" Mrs. Chesterfield said as she hugged Bertram.
"I am so sorry!" Jessie apologized. "I was making a video for my friend Darla back home..."
Mrs. Chesterfield then looked into the camcorder.
"Marla! Your friend is a horrible nanny! She couldn't take care of a bowl of sea monkeys!" she yelled before she walked off.
"I will have you know all of my sea monkeys died of natural causes! And a thirsty cat," Jessie argued weakly before she cringed.
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Back at home, Luke, Emma, Natasha, and Ravi were in the screening room, watching a video of a dog flushing a toilet. Luke scoffed and turned off his tablet.
"I can't believe that stupid video got two million hits," he said.
"And the kid who posted it won a free trip to Hollywood," Emma added.
"Dad would be so proud of us if we made a great viral video."
"He might even forget that you sold his Golden Globe to get a new skateboard," Ravi said.
"Honestly, you couldn't have gotten the money yourself?" Natasha asked.
"Uh, yeah. It was a People's Choice Award. I had to beg that guy to take it," Luke said.
"And my point stands," Natasha said before rolling her eyes.
"Too bad we don't have a cool pet," Emma said before they all started thinking.
Mr. Kipling growled.
"Quiet, Mr. Kipling. We're trying to think!" Natasha said as the four looked up. Mr. Kipling slapped them with his tail.
"That's it!" Luke said.
"A lizard video!" Emma replied.
"That's perfect!" Natasha added.
"A star is hatched!" Ravi said happily.
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Later on, the kids were in the kitchen recording Mr. Kipling for the video.
"He's not doing anything," Luke said.
"He is so! He is oozing star quality," Ravi said with a smile.
Luke closed the camcorder and stood up.
"Well, go get a paper towel and clean it up," he said.
"Oh, I think I just saw him blink!" Emma said. Luke started recording again.
"Oh, wait. That was me blinking," she said with a frown.
"Em, I'm concerned for you sometimes," Natasha said.
°.♡┈┈∘*┈୨୧┈*∘┈┈♡.°
Back in the screening room, Emma came in with a shopping bag.
"Hey, guys. I've got the perfect thing to make Mr. Kipling's video go viral," she said excitedly.
"Let me guess. A cute outfit!" Luke said in a mocking tone.
"No. A cute costume," Emma corrected. "Captain Kipling to the rescue!" She pulled out a small superhero costume.
"I love it!" Ravi said as he looked at the costume.
"It's actually really cute," Natasha said.
"Can we even get him into that?" Luke asked.
"Try keeping him out of it," Ravi said.
After a few minutes, the kids finally managed to get the costume on Mr. Kipling, but they were exhausted and clearly had been attacked by the lizard, as their clothes were torn.
"That was not so hard," Ravi said as he was sitting on the floor.
"Yeah, we still have most of our fingers," Luke said.
"And we didn't lose that much blood. Hey, is that a unicorn?" Natasha said as she pointed at nothing.
"It's worth it. He looks totes adorable," Emma said.
"Okay, so, let's go throw him off the stairway and pretend that he's flying," Luke said as the four stood up.
"I hope you are planning on having a stunt lizard," Ravi said with concern.
"Oh, relax! When we throw him, we'll aim for the couch."
"Luke, you can't even aim correctly for the toilet," Natasha remarked as Emma and Ravi nodded in agreement.
"True," Luke said in realization.
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Later on, Luke was standing at the top of the staircase with a pumpkin while Ravi, Emma, and Natasha were watching him from below.
"Ravi, if you really want our video to go viral, let me bungee Mr. Kipling off the balcony! Look how safe it is," Luke said before he pushed the pumpkin off the railing, causing it to land on the floor and splatter everywhere. Mr. Kipling hissed before he slithered away.
"This is why Mr. Kipling does not work with first time directors!" Ravi said as Luke came downstairs.
"Hey, Luke. Dad texted you back," Natasha said as Emma picked up the phone.
"He says 'To make a hit movie, tell the story that's in your heart. Then hire Johnny Depp.'," Emma said as she read the message.
"Hey, Mr. Kipling is the star of this video. He gets top billing," Ravi said.
"'And if you can't get Johnny Depp, strap the camera to the lizard and see what happens.'," Emma finished.
"That is brilliant! We'll have to give Dad a shout out when we accept our Webby award," Luke said.
"Wait! If Mr. Kipling is also going to be the cameraman, he must be paid double," Ravi said.
"Since we're paying him nothing, deal!" Luke said sarcastically.
°.♡┈┈∘*┈୨୧┈*∘┈┈♡.°
After Mr. Kipling had frightened Mrs. Chesterfield in the kitchen, the kids ran inside to catch up with him.
"Hi, there!" Emma said.
"Sorry about that," Luke apologized.
"No sudden moves! He can smell fear," Ravi warned.
"That smell's been coming off me all night," Bertram said.
"Bertram, I'm going to faint! Catch me," Mrs. Chesterfield said before she fell to the floor. The key lime pie fell off the counter and landed on her face before Mr. Kipling slithered towards her.
"He's licking my face!" she sobbed.
"Better him than me," Bertram said.
"Well this is definitely the highlight of my year," Natasha said as she and her siblings laughed.
°.♡┈┈∘*┈୨୧┈*∘┈┈♡.°
"That video of Kipling kicking Chesterfield was hilarious," Emma said as they went to the terrace.
"Too bad it was completely out of focus," Luke said as he closed the camera and sat down. "Kipling really blew it."
"He is a lizard, not J.J. Abrams!" Ravi defended.
"Hey, what's this rope ladder doing out here?" Natasha asked.
"Who cares? Let's dress Mr. Kipling as a pirate and have him present to climb it," Emma suggested.
"Great idea," Luke said. "We'll need an eye patch, a peg leg, and a hook."
Mr. Kipling growled.
"And that's just for whoever tries to get him into the costume," Natasha said.
°.♡┈┈∘*┈୨୧┈*∘┈┈♡.°
Later on, the kids were watching the video of Mr. Kipling "climbing" the ladder.
"Mr. Kipling looks quite the swashbuckler, does he not?" Ravi asked.
"This stinks," Emma said.
"I told you, we should've moved the furniture," Natasha said.
"I give up," Luke sighed. "Making a funny viral video is impossible if you don't have a talking dog or a sneezing panda."
"Hi, guys! You wanna see the video I just posted?" Zuri said as she came into the screening room and showed a video on the screen. The video was of Jessie panicking and crying on the terrace earlier that day."
"No! No, no, no! Bad! The tiara! Gone! Fell! It fell! It's gone! It's gone! Really, really bad! Cut! Cut! Turn it off! Cut! Cut! Cut! Cut!"
The kids laughed at the video as Jessie walked in.
"Please don't tell me you put this on the Internet," she said as she pointed at the screen.
"Yep! You're a star!" Zuri said as she closed the video.
"You already got 40,000 hits!" Emma said.
"You're gonna be more popular than that monkey who sniffed his own butt!" Luke said with a smile as they continued laughing.
"Great! Now thousands of people think I'm a klutz," Jessie said, but then she widened her eyes. "Who lives in a penthouse and has an awesome priceless jewelry collection? I'm sending a link to Darla back home."
"That should have been Mr. Kipling. I guess he is just another pretty face with no talent," Ravi said sadly.
Suddenly, piano playing was heard from the living room. Ravi ran to see what it was, but he saw Mr. Kipling just sitting there, hissing. He sighed before he went back into the screening room, and Mr. Kipling continued playing.
[Author's note: Hey, everyone! I just want to say thank you guys SO MUCH for more than 1k reads! I never imagined that this book would become popular and I'm so grateful that you guys have tuned in to read this book. Thank you all so much and stay tuned for more chapters! <3]