It's too late to turn back now
I don't want to go back down
Digging in the back of my mind
Just to see what else I can find
Always been afraid of never meeting their standards
Always try improving myself until my head hurts
Sometimes I wonder where I'd be if I never started doing this
Took all of my pain and tears and started using it
Writing suicide notes almost every night
Battles in my head always end in bloody fights
All my life I've been looking for my own purpose
With my knife I started scratching the surface
I've finally made it out of suicidal thoughts
Don't hate me for flexing all of my dead flaws
You don't know what I risked to come this far along
Even with succes I still remain feeling so alone
I don't show it but sometimes I really hate this
Unfamiliar faces talking to me makes me anxious
Sorry if I disappear I don't know how to take it
It's not your fault but I don't want to fake it
Started crying more when I hear lyrics of a sad song
Repeating suicide lines everytime I sing along
Cause I remember back then i didn't want to be alive
But now my heart isn't so black cause I got a revive
Sometimes I wonder where I'd be if I never started doing this
Took all of my pain and tears then started using it
Writing suicide notes almost every night
Battles in my head always end in bloody fights
All my life I've been looking for my own purpose
With my knife I started scratching the surface
And I still get scared thinking of what would've gone down if I died
Family walk into my room and start to breakdown and cry
I wouldn't have left much behind
Just the sad roadmaps of my life
I put all of my soul into what I write
Hope it helps me sleep good at night
I'm tired of putting myself in the back of the line
For people who never wanted my time
The devil stole parts of my life
So I'm taking back what's mine