23 - Charred Silences
ZARA
"Well, you must have amazing powers of persuasion," Rebecca said once the door was shut, and she was released from my hold. A sly grin played on her lips as she made her observation, and I couldn't help but roll my eyes in response as I made my way to sit on the edge of the bed.
"The guy said Alpha Haden gave the okay for me to come see you. I can't believe you have the scariest Alpha wrapped around your little finger!" Rebecca continued, her voice dripping with amusement. "This is crazy."
I couldn't help but chuckle, although I was quick to defend myself, "I don't have him wrapped around my finger. This is his way of getting back in my good books. If he thinks it's going to be that easy, he can think again."
"Well, I can't say I object. It's better than being in a cell," she mused, hopping into the bed with me.
"I hate that," I frowned, the frustration of her being imprisoned all this time gnawing at me. "You shouldn't be in a cell facing the worst."
Rebecca shrugged, her grasp on my hands tight and reassuring. "It isn't so bad. I mean, sure, it would be nice to be out and running about, but they treat me well. The food is amazing; I was surprised at the quality but then a few of the other rogues mentioned that the cook upstairs is amazing. She doesn't care if you're a rogue or not; she keeps you fed and fed good."
Her words eased my fears and warmed my heart.
"But the Alpha didn't just bring me here so we can talk about me. Don't think I missed the little interaction between you two. What gives?"
A sigh escaped my lips, and I reluctantly opened up about the complicated situation between Haden and me. Rebecca listened intently, her hazel eyes filled with understanding, uncertainty, and outrage as she absorbed every detail.
"The thing is, I'm not angry at Natalia," I explained, my voice tinged with weariness. "She didn't do anything wrong, and you know how much I hate women who blame the other woman for her man's actions. There should never have been a reason for her to even think there was something going on, especially if you kissed me the night before."
Rebecca's disapproval was palpable. "It sounds like he didn't even break things off with her. What an ass."
I agreed, nodding with a somber expression. "He is, which is why he's going to have to make up for it, big time."
"But?" Rebecca prompted, her curiosity unmistakable.
A brow raised. "But what?"
She scoffed.
"I know you well enough to know there's a but coming, now spit it out,"
I hesitated for a moment before continuing, "But me finding my mate doesn't change the fact that I have to keep running. You know what he'll do when he finds me."
We shared a knowing look, the haunting memories of my past flooding back. The relentless pursuit of the man who had killed my family, and later, my unwitting acceptance of Haden as my mate, had haunted me for years. He wouldn't stop hunting me.
Rebecca tried to offer words of reassurance. "He hasn't found you yet; I don't see why he should now. Don't worry about it."
I chuckled and playfully shoved her. She wasn't lying. She was one of the only people left who knew me well enough.
"But me finding my mate doesn't change the fact that I have to keep running. You know what he'll do when he finds me."
We both shared a look, the memories fleetingly fogging our minds, a hint of fear having my stomach in knots. The ghosts of the past would always haunt me, threatening the level of normalcy I had built for myself. No matter where I went after all this time, he still found me. I had spent ages chasing after one ghost - the man who killed my family - but when I gave that part of my life up, I welcomed another phantom in my life without realizing it.
He would never stop hunting me.
I had told Rebecca about him, of course, when I initially met her and the rest of my chosen family. Opening up to them seemed to ease the burden at the time and it was almost a comfort to know that they would protect me if that time came. But now things were different.
Now they were all gone - all but Rebecca.
Without realizing it, my grip on her hand tightened and I had to force myself to take a breath. I knew I had to leave here, the only question was when.
"He hasn't found you yet, I don't see why he should now," Rebecca tried to reassure me, but even her voice held a hint of worry. "Don't worry about it."
Easier said than done.
"Look, why don't we..." she trailed off as she leaned back, "why don't we have a girl's night? I know I'm not going to waste my time out of a cell by being depressed."
Her suggestion brightened my spirits, and I grinned, eager for some distraction. I dug out the TV remote from the covers and powered it up. In the midnight darkness, the TV screen illuminated our small space as we snuggled under the covers to watch reruns of Friends, chasing away the shadows and worries.
An hour in, laughter and the familiar sitcom soundtrack filled the room, allowing us to temporarily forget our troubles. But our newfound serenity was disrupted by a knock on the door, followed by Conner's head peeking in.
"Ladies," he greeted, a warm smile on his face as he stepped fully into the room, his arms tucked behind his back.
"Aww, don't tell me I have to go back to my cell now," Rebecca whined beside me as she pouted. Conner chuckled and shook his head.
"No, but I do have an invitation for dinner," he said looking intently at me before his gaze drifted to Rebecca and smiled, "both of you."
Before I could protest, Rebecca leaned up and eagerly agreed. "There's no way I'm passing up on good food," she said and I rolled my eyes and got up. Conner stepped forward, bringing his hand from behind his back and I caught sight of women's clothing in his right hand.
"Thinking of switching sides, Conner?" I teased and he rolled his eyes.
"My mate thought it would be nice to offer you both some comfortable clothes," he explained as he tossed the outfits on the bed, "see you both downstairs." With a charming wink, he backed out of the room and shut the door behind him.
I blankly looked at Rebecca, who shrugged.
"What?" she asked, "I'm hungry."
-
Tensions were high at the dinner table, not that I'd expect anything else. The clatter of silverware was the only sound that bounced off the walls. I tried my best to ignore the sideway glances from the people at the table. My harsh gaze was focused on one person and he sat on the other side of the long dinner table, meeting my eyes with the same level of annoyance. There wasn't much to be said. I mean, what did you say to the man who was supposed to be your mate but was caught lip-locked with another woman?
Exactly.
So instead of releasing my wrath, I cut into the lasagne and took a bite, my eyes fixated on the man at the far end of the table.
"So..." Natalia started, looking around the table for a conversation starter.
"So the food is great, wouldn't you say Rebecca?" Abigale offered.
Rebecca who sat beside me smiled and nodded.
"I don't know who's doing the cooking, but it's great," she added, "better than the food we used to eat, that's for sure."
"What do you think, Zara?" Natalia nudged but I didn't say anything, my eyes saying all I needed to say to the one person who should hear those words. When I didn't respond to Natalia, silence found the room again, this time echoing around the room with despair hanging by its coattails.
I didn't want friendly conversation right now; I had no appetite for that. Not when his image of him underneath Natalia was still fresh in my head. I didn't want to talk about how good the food was. I didn't want to think about how unimaginably sexy he was sitting there, staring at me with those deep dark eyes. The undeniable allure of his presence, accentuated by his dark, intense eyes locked onto mine, was a cruel reminder of the complexity of our entwined fates.
"Can you both just talk!" Abigale suddenly screamed, startling everyone at the table and we all turned to look at her. "You both need to just clear the air and talk out whatever issues are going on. Go on, talk."
I locked eyes with her, and her gaze subtly shifted toward Haden. As my gaze reconnected with his, I could sense his inner turmoil, but I had no intention of lingering to unravel it. I stood, leaving nothing behind me worth looking back on.