Espresso sat on a bench, legs crossed as he stifled a laugh. Madeleine was swinging on the swings, repeatedly asking if Espresso was watching him.
"You're watching, right?" Madeleine asked for the fourteenth time.
"Yes, I'm watching," Espresso responded. "You're swinging very high."
Madeleine giggled as he swung as high as he could, his long hair flowing behind him. "I'm gonna jump!" He yelled.
"N-No, Madeleine! Not when you're swinging that high!" Espresso stood up, stepping over towards the swings. "You could get hurt!"
"You jumped from a window an hour ago."
"You were there to catch me—I'm not strong enough to catch you if you jump."
Madeleine frowned but obeyed. He sighed as he swung lower, before jumping sadly from that height. He landed safely, turning to Espresso. "That was boring. You should have let me jump when I was swinging higher."
Espresso shrugged. "Listen, I just saved you a trip to the hospital. You're welcome."
Madeleine groaned an over exaggerated groan as he threw his head back. "I'm bored now," He complained, glancing around the playground.
Espresso smiled as he watched Madeleine's moonlit eyes trail around the park. He was so beautiful.
Madeleine sighed as he sat on the bench, gesturing for Espresso to sit next to him. Espresso sat as well, happy to be near him. Maybe sneaking out wasn't too bad of an idea after all. His parents probably wouldn't find out, and even if they did, maybe they wouldn't care.
As the two sat together, Espresso felt Madeleine's hand start to hold his own hand again. Espresso felt a blush warm his face as Madeleine held his hand; he tensed up as he felt a tingle rush through his body. His immediate reaction was to jerk his hand away, and Espresso held his hand close to his chest as he looked away.
Madeleine turned to look at him. "What's wrong?" He asked, confused at the sudden reaction to him barely touching his hand.
"Sorry, sorry. I'm, uh... Not used to anyone touching me," He mumbled awkwardly as he laid his hand back down.
"That's okay," Madeleine said as he slowly held Espresso's hand, making sure he was comfortable. "See? There we go; that wasn't so bad, right?" His goofy smile appeared back on his face.
Espresso tensed up again as he stared at their hands intertwining. Thoughts rushed through his mind as he prayed his quickened heartbeat wasn't loud enough to hear. A shaky breath exited his mouth. He yearned for Madeleine's touch, yet he was terrified of it. He felt rather foolish that he couldn't pick a damn side. "This is stupid. I'm sorry." He tried to look away again.
Madeleine used his free hand to hold his chin and gently turned it back to look at him. "It's not stupid."
His eyes widened as he felt Madeleine's fingers against his face. His touch felt so magical. He wanted to stay like this forever. He slowly leaned into the touch as he sat, blushing slightly.
After another moment, Madeleine pulled him in for a hug. Espresso buried his head into Madeleine's chest, gripping him like he would die if he let go. He just wanted Madeleine to hug him like this for a while.
Madeleine gently rocked him back and forth as he hugged him tightly.
Espresso's shaky voice broke the silence. "Can we please stay like this for a while?" He mumbled. Tears began to fall down his face. He didn't even try to stop them.
"Of course," Madeleine instantly said, happy he was making Espresso happy. After a couple of moments of them just sitting and hugging, Madeleine spoke again, "...Hey, Espresso?"
He looked up at him, the night wind making his tear streaks feel cold against his cheeks.
Madeleine hesitated for a second. "You seem really touch starved," He said as he wiped the tears off Espresso's face.
Espresso instinctively leaned into his hand again as Madeleine brushed up against his face. He didn't even realize he was doing it. He shrugged his shoulders.
Silence filled the air for another moment.
"My family..." Espresso started, choosing his words carefully. "My parents aren't that affectionate," He said, avoiding eye contact. "I can't remember the last time they hugged me. Or showed any genuine affection. I... I'm not actually sure if they ever did." A look of confusion spread across his face as he tried to recall a time when either his father or mother had hugged him. He couldn't think of any. All that came to mind was all the time Latte was praised continuously as Espresso stood off to the side, patiently waiting for his turn.
Madeleine slowly leaned forward, cupping his face in his hands as he kissed his lips. "I can help with that."
Espresso gasped as he looked up, his eyes wide. Madeleine's lips felt so soft against his. Madeleine was smiling down at him as they both blushed. Tears stung the backs of Espresso's eyes as he gripped Madeleine's hand. "I-I..." He was speechless.
Madeleine kissed him again, this time on his forehead. "It's okay, Espresso," He said quietly as he planted kisses all over Espresso's trembling face.
Madeleine had... kissed him. He actually kissed him, not caring about how broken Espresso was. Espresso knew he should be happy, but all he felt was dread. His breathing grew faster and faster as he stared at Madeleine in fear.
Madeleine stopped kissing him as he realized his trembles were getting worse. He tilted his head in confusion. "Espresso? What's wrong?" He asked, still gently holding Espresso's face.
Espresso stayed silent for a second before bursting into tears. Fear filled his body and clouded his mind as he tried to tell him what was wrong but couldn't.
Madeleine grew more worried. "I-I'm sorry," Madeleine said, hoping he didn't upset him by kissing him. He thought he was doing something good. He thought it would have calmed him down. "I shouldn't have kissed you, I'm sorry if I triggered something, I-I should have asked-"
"No..." Espresso forced out between sobs, his breathing growing even faster. "D-Don't... Don't tell them... Please."
This made Madeleine even more confused as he tried to figure out who "they" were. "Huh..? Who?" He asked, still gently holding Espresso's hand in an attempt to calm him down.
Another moment passed before Espresso could force out another sentence. "My-My parents. Please," He mumbled as he felt his senses heighten. Suddenly, everything was too loud. Every little thing that brushed up against him caused fear to pulse through his body. His ears were ringing, his head pounded... "Please don't tell my parents..!"
Madeleine stared down at Espresso's shaking body, unsure of what to do. The desperation in his voice and the way Espresso was looking up at him with pleading eyes, begging him like his life depended on it was terrifying.
Espresso kept staring into Madeleine's eyes before bursting back into tears and covering his ears with his hands as he continued to scream and cry and shake.
"Uh- Hey, listen to me, love." Madeleine gently took his shaking hands off of his ears and tilted his chin up so Espresso could look at him. "I-I won't tell them, okay?"
"They'd kill me!" Espresso screamed, his shaky voice piercing into the silence of the night. "Please, please don't tell them..!" His eyes were wide with pure horror as he begged Madeleine not to tell them.
"I won't," Madeleine assured him again. "I won't. I haven't even met your parents, right? I won't tell them."
Espresso clung to Madeleine as he buried his face into him. Still confused, Madeleine cautiously held him and began rocking him back and forth a little. "It'll be okay," Madeleine said. "You're safe, and... and I love you."
Espresso was panicking too badly to even process his words, but Madeleine's peaceful tone of voice started to calm him down a little. After another minute or two, his body started to shake less. Every once and a while, a staggered and quiet, "please," would escape his lips, so soft that Madeleine could barely hear him.
"There we go!" Madeleine smiled down at Espresso as he stopped shaking as much. "You're doing amazing, love. Let's take deep breaths now, okay? Deep breaths..." Madeleine started taking deep breaths, hoping Espresso would too.
Espresso's ragged breaths slowly became calmer as he followed Madeleine's breathing. "...I'm okay now," Espresso mumbled as he sat up, glancing away from Madeleine in embarrassment. "I'm so sorry, that was so stupid..." He gritted his teeth as he held his pounding head.
"No, it's okay!" Madeleine responded. He looked at Espresso. "Did... Was that a panic attack?"
Espresso shrugged, leaning back against the bench, fidgeting with his fingers. "I dunno. Stuff like that just kinda happens to me sometimes. But, uh, thank you for calming me down."
"Of course! That seemed really scary, are you sure you're okay now?" He reached out to hold Espresso's hand, glancing up at him to see if he was okay with it.
Espresso nodded a little as consent and Madeleine held his hand tightly, smiling as they both leaned into each other. "I'm fine," Espresso responded, gently leaning his head against Madeleine's shoulder, his face heating up again.
They sat there for a moment, just resting against each other. A cool breeze flowed through the air and Espresso shivered.
"Do you want my jacket?" Madeleine asked, glancing down at Espresso.
"Really?" He looked up at him.
"Yeah! Here," Madeleine took off his jacket and put it on Espresso. He giggled. "Sorry, it's a little big on you."
Espresso smiled as the jacket shielded him from the cold night winds. "That's alright. Thank you." He looked up at Madeleine before leaning against him again, smiling.
Madeleine was so warm and comforting. He wanted to stay like this forever and ever.