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"Because it was you on the line again"
Her breath halted for a moment as she realized there was no running back now. Zoya met his gaze which was hazy from the medicines but something about her sitting before him with her bare face made her stomach churn, he didn't deserve this sight of hers.
Zaman groaned when he tried sitting up and Zoya nearly held him in her arms to help him up, but her hands stopped almost an inch away from him.
"Zoya" he heaved, finally settling himself against the headrest. His hand reached out to hold hers and before she could pull away Zahan tightened his grip on her hand.
"If you dare escape me this time—" he paused to look her in the eye, the night light and the light from the hallway somewhat made her face visible to him and his throat tightened.
He couldn't believe it.
"Oh Zoya" he whispered cupping her face, tear after tear fell on his cheeks as he got closer to her and Zoya sat there frozen under his touch. Her mind had gone blank and she didn't know how to respond anymore.
"My Zoya" Zahan was in disbelief as he broke down crying on her shoulder, his arms caging her, as if she would disappear with the wind. He pulled her close to his chest sobbing uncontrollably, breaking both of their hearts all over again.
"Zoya"
Her name was the only thing he could utter in that moment, no other word existed for him and he had no control over himself.
After what felt like hours Zahan sobered up and took in a deep breath, he pulled away from her and wiped her shoulder off his tears forcing a chuckle out of his aching throat before holding her face, all the while Zoya stared at him with numbness seeping in her veins.
"I... I need to see you better, you're here" he was mumbling to himself as he turned around to search for the closest light switch all the while keeping her forearm in his hold as if he won't be able to see her after this night.
The woman before him said nothing as he finally succeeded in turning on the light above his bed and the face he was met with made a fresh batch of tears blur his vision.
It was her, a little mature, a lot more serious and dark. He couldn't stop himself from staring at the woman before him, she really was here. Right here. Right in front of him, all perfect.
"Are— are you okay?" He asked to inspect her for injuries and he sucked in a breath when he noticed the bandages on her arms, hands and one on her forehead.
He received no reply but a blank stare that sent chills down his spine. She looked awfully like his wife but the way she was staring at him as if he had grown two heads made him retract his touch for a second before firming it again.
"Zoya, say something" he pleaded, scooting closer to her but for the first time she moved her eyes away from him.
"Rest here for as long as you wish, once everything is taken care of Ahmed will drop you home safely" that was the only thing she said before walking out of the room and closing the door behind her.
Zahan didn't even have the time to close his mouth from when he was about to speak again, he gulped his emotions down like poison and when the hurt settled in his mind it took the form of rage, worse than he had ever felt.
He clenched his jaw and pulled the quilt off him in a hurry, he had barely stood up on his feet when he fell down with a loud thud, only then did he notice the brace around his foot.
He had injured his left arm, twisted his ankle, nearly broken it and he was covered in bruises. The physical pain was something that took his mind off of what had just happened to him. He had gotten abandoned twice, after what felt like begging for his life back.
He heard the door open and watched as the man he had recognized as her bodyguard approached him. He helped him back onto the bed and stared at him for a second too long.
"What?" Zahan snapped and Ahmed scoffed.
"If I were you, I'd reconsider," Ahmed said, making Zahan clench his jaw.
"I don't need you meddling in my business, guard," Zahan snapped, rolling his eyes, making Ahmed chuckle.
"I would've dropped you back where you belong but I've orders to follow" Ahmed paused momentarily before continuing "so do you need anything? Self-respect? A reality check?"
"Fuck off"
"Tamam" Ahmed said, pulling his hands up before walking out of the room casually. He knew if Zoya found out he even spoke to this man she'll behead him but he needed to be put in his place.
(Okay)
Morning came soon after and a maid came knocking on Zahan's door with his breakfast. He hadn't moved from his place where she had left him to piece back his broken hope and he hated to admit even his heart. Zahan was confused, was he being delusional? Was she really zoya or a woman who looked like her and him in his desperation had thought she was his lost wife? But then when ahmer came to visit him followed by a teary hadiya his suspicion left him too.
He didn't know why but he was missing his mother and his family more these days, maye moving to istanbul was in fact a bad idea as his mother had once suggested. It had been three weeks and he had been confined in this room, there wasn't much detail in the room that could focus on or even want to admire except for the huge window that overlooked the sunny beach. Ahmer brought holly to him and he was happy, the cat had kept him accompanied where as the owner of his house was nowhere to be seen, he did sometime here the maid calling her name but then he would tune it out since he didn't want to even think that he was here because of his damned ankle.
Zahan barely had any sense of time left in him as he stared at the four walls of his room, it was after a lot of courage did he decide he wanted to step out of this place, he reached forward to grab his cane and tried to to stand up on his own. He placed his right foot on the floor trying not to put all of his body weight on it, a sudden jolt of pain made him wince and stumble, nearly twisting it all over again. Zahan clenched his jaw to not make a noise that could distract any attention from the sleeping nurse.
Zahan froze everytime the cane hit the floor as the night grew cold and dark, he hadn't realized the day had parted and now all there left was the ever haunting dark, limping and wincing he walked in the corridor, looking around like a curious child when his eyes fell on the light coming from the creak open door. He walked towards it and soft music filled his ears, making him knit his eyebrows together, tilting his head as he peeped inside the room that he recognized to be a study.
His cat, hollys meow made him open the door more, waiting to see holly on the piano wrecking it. He saw the back of a woman and his cat in her lap. She was the one playing while his hyper ball of fur was rolling around in her embrace.
Leaning against the doorframe zahan eased his right foot and listened, the piece was enchanting but his attention was on the woman who maybe didn't even know he was there, her black hair was tied up in a ponytail and he watched as holly climbed on shoulders to curl against her neck like a scarf.
"You're such a pretty girl" She lifted her hand to scratch the cat's little head while cooing at the cat making Zahan's gaze soften, the voice, the loose shoulders, the ponytail, everything reminded him of her from seven years ago. His shuddered at how fast his heart malfunctioning, at one point it softened to the sight on the other it hardened with rage and hatred.
Zahan was lost in his thoughts then he nearly jumped at holly rubbing against his leg. The woman had turned around to see where the cat was suddenly going and froze when she realized she now had company.
Zoya turned her head around to avoid him. Her face was not worth looking at, it looked strict, cold and scarred. There was nothing worse than having someone see the remembrance of her humiliating life in that cell, a shiver ran down her spine when the memory of that time resurfaced. Her own screams sometimes came back to haunt her; she was not about to sleep to the sound of them being her lullaby.
"Are you not even going to ask me how I am?" Zahan scoffed, he always did at the end of every situation that was related to her. He was tired, too, tired to be the one who solves all the riddles himself.
"I get updates from your nurse"
Now that got a full laugh out of him, her face flared up at the mocking tone of his laugh but what was she going to do? Her brain never worked right when it came to him.
"Yet you act like you don't care" he gritted as his eyes hardened, his heart on the other end. Melted. It always did when it came to her.
Only for it to burn his conscience on its way deep in his mind. He was supposed to despise her or mourn her, but here he was standing before the face of his wife who he still could only envision as a blurry picture of his Zoya.
"Why?" He asked desperately, his voice a deep and low whisper that caused goosebumps to erupt all over of her skin.
"Why are you always silent?" He asked, taking a step towards her and her hand fisted on the back of the piano chair.
"Zoya" he spoke again when he was about four feet away from her. His voice stern as he glared at her back, he could see the physical turmoil of her shoulder dropping his straightening all over again. He had no idea what was going through her mind and it bothered him.
It drove him crazy.
"If you don't want me, then tell me damnit!" He yelled making her hold back the jump reflex, this wasn't the voice she could bear being yelled at by.
"Why?! Why must I always undo the knots and understand it all? Just tell me to leave and I'll fucking leave. After all this time you choose to hold me hostage and not even tell me why" he yelled, turning her around with a force she lost her balance and held the chair for support.
The light was too bright to hide anything from him now, the scar on her face that ran from her temple all the way to the corner of her lips, distorting the perfect symmetry of her face and when it caught his eye Zahan fell silent.
Her breathing picked up and Zoya tried to pull away from him but there was something about the way this man held her that made it nearly impossible for her body to move out of his seemingly gentle embrace.
His hand was barely holding her but she couldn't move. Maybe it was the confusion and hurt and pain on his face that made her stay put in the place she was.
Maybe she wanted to know what he would do.
Maybe she hoped he'd leave her after seeing how disgusting she looked, or how she wasn't the flawless girl he had fallen in love with.
"Wh—" his hand was caught before it reached out to touch her face, his eyes finally met hers and he could feel the glare bestowed upon him but the tears that threaded to fall made it nearly impossible to move past them.
"Leave" she spoke and Zahan didn't want to follow what she had just said.
"I have nothing to give you, no hope, no joy and definitely no love" she said, pushing him back just a little so she could straighten up. Her heart was racing but she had this very moment to speak her mind and then lock him out again.
Her heart torn into pieces as his eyes darted from one point of her face to the other trying to recognize who she was and what she had become. His mouth fell open and closed again trying to figure out if all of this was a mirage or reality.
Zahan felt helpless, his heart lurching in his throat blocking any path for air to pass down into his lungs. He felt restrained.
"Why? Give me a reason, how is a women this influential, so powerless when comes to speaking her mind" he said and Zoya closed her eyes shut in frustration.
"Tell me, what burden have you been carrying all alone?" He stepped closer, making sure his voice was soft for her to feel his warmth but she pushed him. Zahan didn't budge, his hand caught hers and twisted them behind her back, making her arch into him with no escape.
His eyes narrowed a little and he brought his head down closer to hers making their noses brush. Her breath hitched and her lips fell ajar. The warmth in his gaze turned cold as he tightened his grip onto her wrist, his teeth gritted as he spoke.
"Who did this to you?" His eyes met her fiercely and Zoya felt her old self resurface, the cold dominating wraith was nothing Infront of this man.
"Zahan—" her voice wavered trying to get him to let her go as his grip stayed hurting her, nearly bruising her wrist before he pushed her away with a force. Her back met the chairs wooden edge and Zoya held in a loud cry.
"Why? For god's sake tell me why did you run away—" he yelled, making her close her eyes and her tears to fall on her cheeks, travel the length of her scar making her feel even more disgusted about herself.
"How— how did— how did you do all of this alone? Why— why did you choose to go through this alone?" His voice broke and Zoya closed her eyes to avoid seeing him watch her in this state.
"Tell me why?" He asked grabbing onto her arms and Zoya's patience broke down.
"Why?" He yelled again and Zoya lifted her rear stricken face up to meet his gaze.
"Because I couldn't face you, I couldn't just come back running to you after all that I put you through" she yelled trying her best not to break down.
"I can't look you in the eye and say that I'm sorry because there nothing in this world that I can do to make you forgive me, I ruined your whole family, I took your Chacho away from you, made you got through all of that torture for nothing. For my childish hunger for justice." she sobbed and Zahan took a step back.
"I've killed countless people, I've formed mercenaries and have ruined thousands of lives. I'm not the girl you were waiting to meet, the girl who left with a purpose to avenge her family has died in a cold, rotten cell with no sign of life or light. Where no one came to throw some food at your feet.
I have nothing to give you. Nothing"
She yelled by the end and Zahan took a step away from her, somewhere deep inside her chest her heartbroke as the realization of what she had become settled in his mind.
It was as though he had never even thought of the fact that all that he had witnessed her do was actually her doing. In his delusional mind she was still the same Zoya who would cry if her bunny fell sick or would pout at every little discomfort.
This woman before him had nothing left in herself, her hands no longer played with colors and her techy cameras, they tackled firearms and people. She wasn't the same contract assistant photographer who worked for that annoying zulqarnain, she made people work for her, for her sick and twisted plans.
Even now as he moved his eyes away from her scarred and cold face his eyes fell on the desk on his left, the number of papers on it reminded him of his own desk back home, where he'd spent sleepless nights accompanied by her and her famous coffee.
His heart nearly stopped and he winced in pain when his weight shifted from his left foot to his right and Zoya flinched watching him struggle. She couldn't move, nor could she do anything to help. She could only watch as the man limped backwards, meeting her eyes once before calling his cat to himself and walking out with her in his tow.
Zahan was conflicted, he had been hoping for a stranger to remember him, waiting for her to remember her feelings for him. His eyes welled with water and he wiped a hand on his cheeks confused at the wetness that now soaked his face. His nurse was in the corridor looking for him when she paused to find him.
She was about to say something when her eyes flickered to the end of the corridor where the lady of the house walked out of her study and headed downstairs, no words were exchanged but from the sound of her footsteps and the door closing Zahan knew she had run away yet again.
He knew he couldn't stay there for long now, he was going to leave tomorrow morning and hopefully will never return to this house again...
It wasn't worth it anyways.
Assalamualikum guys how are you all?
So here is an update.
i hope you like it.
Comment and tell me how it is.
Enjoy.
Allah Hafiz.
Love,
Hafsa Tahir ❤️