"Ella, what are you doing?" Lisa asked as soon as she caught up with her sister. She glanced back again at Jennie, what she could see of Jennie, in the crowd behind them as Ella half dragged her to the quiet spot in the back of the room.
It at least made more sense why Elle had been so annoying about Lisa's outfit and makeup. Lisa had thought her sister was just being in her typical little pushy mode by insisting that Lisa actually get a decent outfit and sit through Ella's little beauty parlour bit before coming here, but now. "Did you plan this?" She asked as they stopped by the fire exit doors.
"Uh, of course I did." Ella rolled her eyes. "And it's perfect? So shut up."
"What the hell do you think is going to happen?" Lisa stared back at her. Ella just scoffed again, crossing her arms.
"I've been hanging out with Jennie for like, weeks now." She admitted, looking unapologetic for the fact. "And every time you come up she gets this distant mooney look on her face. And honestly? It's really gross."
Lisa was about to protest, but Ella wasn't done talking, jabbing a finger into Lisa's chest. "But what's grosser is the fact that you guys haven't talked in ages and she's still acting like that. She fucking misses you, sis."
"She lied to me." Lisa said, though not as convicted as she usually was. She swallowed slightly nervously.
"Yeah, cause I told her to." Lisa was pretty sure Ella's eyes were going to fall out of her head if she kept rolling them. "And obviously it wasn't all lies if she's acting like this still, ages later."
Woon walked up just then, looking between the two sisters as he stood close to Ella with a slight supportive nod in her direction, while also effectively stopping Lisa from having a good exit. She was literally cornered right now, in the back of the room, while her sister talked.
"I thought she was faking too, but the last couple of weeks she just, she sighs so goddamn much." Ella groaned. "I mean, I was thinking of ways to get you guys to talk when she came up and suggested the prom thing, pro bono, and I was like shit yeah! Dad suggested some things too."
Lisa blinked. "Dad's in on this too?"
"Yeah, guess what, he thinks she's good for you." Ella's voice dropped into a mocking tone before shifting to a more scolding one. "Your grades got better, you quit smoking, you stopped getting into fights." She counted on her fingers as she rang off the reasonings.
Woon bent in and whispered something to Ella, who glanced up and over to the other side of the room. Lisa followed her gaze and saw Jennie standing there against the far wall, staring at her hands. Ella nodded to Woon and turned back to her sister.
"Just... hang out tonight." She said, voice dropping the usual annoyed Ella tone into something a bit gentler. "Spend time hating this until it's over, spend time being mad at me, spend time being grumpy useless idiots, just spend it together. Hang out, clean slate, no bets or deals or because she has to, but because she wants to." Ella nodded her head over Jennie, who Lisa noticed now was watching both of them. "And she knows you want to too."
Lisa looked back over to Jennie and then to her sister, unsure. She couldn't help smiling a little, at Ella with her arms crossed and a stern but concerned look on her face in the dim light of the prom.
"When'd you get so mature?" Lisa asked.
Ella laughed. "I've been trying to get you realize I'm not a kid anymore for ages." She smiled softly back at her sister. "I'm going to go talk to her now, you stay here. Woon, make her stay here." With a quick peck on his cheek, Ella turned and walked quickly over to where Jennie was standing. The boy gave a little awkward laugh and turned to Lisa.
"So you like a Pinksy, huh?" He asked, amused.
"Fuckoff." She muttered quickly, crossing her arms. Woon just laughed some more.
"She's right you know," he said, a bit nervously to be standing up to Lisa like this, still not completely grown out of the shy little kid she used to tease when they were younger, but the hard edges of the life they've all lived still making him tough enough to try it. He nodded to where Ella and Jennie were talking. "You changed a lot when you started hanging out with her."
Lisa just snorted, shaking her head.
"I don't know that girl from the next Pinksy, but I know you Lisa." Woon frowned. "I can tell the difference between when you're having a bad day or a good one. The dumb look on your face when you talked about her, which was so much." He laughed, teasing.
Lisa wasn't sure what emotion was showing on her face as she said "It's more complicated than that." Woon snorted in reply.
"Is it?" He asked, that shy little kid gone from his face as he gave a shrug. "Isn't that what high school's about? Fucking up, figuring ourselves out, learning from our mistakes? You think just 'cause she's a Pinksy she can't have regrets too?"
Ella whistled at them, drawing their attention as she walked up with Jennie's wrist firmly held in her hand, almost marching forward to drag the taller girl behind her. Stopping and shoving Jennie almost right into Lisa, both of them stumbling a bit with surprise, Ella crossed her arms with a determined tilt of her chin.
"Just spend tonight talking." She said, an exasperated tone in her voice. "And if it's the last time you ever do it, fine, but at least do this one thing." She grabbed onto Woon's hand now, tugging him a bit as she stepped back. "Woon and I are going to dance now." She announced, tugging him back and he laughed, hands in the air in surrender. "If you leave I'll tell Dad!"
The couple dipped into the crowd toward the refreshment table, leaving Jennie and Lisa to stand there.
Lisa shoved her hands in her pants pockets and Jennie fidgeted her fingers.
Lisa wondered which of them would crack first.
"So," Jennie dragged out both letters in the word, clicking her tongue, "what were your plans this evening? Spiking the punch?"
Lisa couldn't help the laugh that snorted out of her. "Really? You think I'd pull that kind of thing?"
Jennie laughed lightly. "Of course, how pedestrian for you. Maybe some obscene graffiti that won't show up until they turn on the black lights?"
"Nah, that's more Elle's thing." Lisa chuckled, relaxing slightly. She looked over at Jennie, who was still staring at her fingers. "What were you planning on doing tonight?"
Jennie cleared her throat, looking up into the room and tucking her hair behind an ear. Lisa watched the movement, suddenly uncomfortably aware of how much she missed it. "Suffering boredom, mostly." Jennie was saying. "I was just here to honour my..." she chewed her bottom lip in search of the right word, "bargain."
"Didn't want to meet up with anyone here?" Lisa asked, chest tight.
Jennie looked over at her, made direct eye contact with those stupid warm eyes and held it a minute before blinking away. "Do you... want me to answer that?" Her voice sounded a bit distant.
Lisa looked away, not really sure how to answer.
They both stood in silence for another minute, as the current song finished playing and the opening notes of the next thumped through the speakers, another fast pace dancing tune to keep the crowd moving. Lisa cleared her throat.
"Look, I want-"
"Well-"
They both stopped, laughing nervously at talking over each other. Lisa cleared her throat again and waved a hand at Jennie. "You first."
Jennie clenched and unclenched her hands together before turning to Lisa, eyes determined. "I'm sorry." She said, talking quickly. "For everything. For deceiving you, dragging it out, making you think that what I felt- making you feel unworthy of anything. I abused your trust and avoided my responsibility and I- I don't need you to forgive me but Ella's right. I did need to say that and now I've said it and we can suffer the rest of this evening in peace."
She ended her quick speech with a puff of whatever air was left in her lungs and turned back to stare aimless at the dancing crowd with a little 'hm', back and shoulders stiff.
Lisa let out her own puff of air, kicking a foot into the varnished hardwood floor, a hundred ideas running through her and making it fucking impossible to think.
Every angry emotion and thought she'd had about Jennie seemed so distant and stupid compared to what she was feeling now, standing beside her while she was dressed like that, standing there looking like that.
The dress was simple, but the colour, that pale blue-grey, stood out so much in the of the room lighting and brought out her features so well. Her hair up with just a couple of twists, one side tucked behind her ear right now, with glittering earrings underneath catching the dancing light in the room.
Standing here, looking like that, and looking at her.
Lisa's eyes flickered up to Jennie's as she realized she'd been caught staring. Lisa blushed and Jennie gave a shy embarrassed smile and they both laughed nervously, looking away.
"Do you-"
"Would you-"
They both stopped as they started talking over each other and laughed again.
A new song began playing, not something Lisa would define as a slow song but definitely a slower pace. A number of the crowd took the song as cue for a break, stopping to talk, or get drinks, while others, couples, took the song to keep dancing but more slowly together.
Jennie stepped a little closer, looking at Lisa, with her too-attractive-gummy smile, and Lisa swallowed the nerves and ache down at both.
"Lisa," Jennie started saying, "If I could, and I hope-"
"Excuse me, Jennie?"
They both looked over to see a boy Lisa didn't recognize, dark eyes and hair in a dark blue suit, standing in front of them now. He was looking at Jennie with that hopeful, expectant look, a friendly smile, and Lisa's stomach twisted.
"Are you here with anyone or just, uh..." his Pinksy accent was clipped as his gaze darted over to Lisa, looking her up and down, unable to hide the brow furrow at her presence. "Just with friends?"
"I'm here with Lisa." Jennie said, something a little harsh in her voice that Lisa recognized from when she would get annoyed.
The boy nodded and then looked even more confused, darting over at Lisa again who shot him a dirty look in return.
"Her?" He asked Jennie.
"Yeah, me, who else? I'm right here, aren't I?" Lisa scowled. She waved a hand between her and Jennie. "We were obviously talking before you came up."
The boy's expression soured as Lisa spoke. "But she's not here with a date." He said coldly, turning back to Jennie. "Right? You're not here with anyone?"
"I'm here with Lisa, I'm not here with a boy, I do not want to dance with you." Jennie stepped closer to Lisa. The boy's face was a full scowl now.
"So what they say's true, huh," his voice sneering as much as his face. "You hang out with this sort now?"
Lisa felt her lip curl and hand clench into a fist at her side, but Jennie placed a hand over it and stepped between the two of them, frowning.
"I hang out with Lisa." Her voice was in full Pinksy haughtiness, just the most sneering, disdainful, 'fuck you I'm better' accent she'd ever heard Jennie use. A squeeze on her hand kept Lisa from moving, and she didn't think she'd be able to anyway. Jennie was intimidating even her. "And we were having a conversation before you selfishly interrupted, thank you."
The boy looked between them, a disgusted look still on his face, and sniffed, turning away. He muttered something Lisa didn't quite hear, but managed to make the hairs on the back of he neck stand up. Sneering, she went to go and grab him, make him say it to her face, but Jennie held her still with the hand she was still holding.
"Not worth it," Jennie muttered, squeezing her hand and placing her other on Lisa's arm as she pulled her back just slightly enough to get Lisa's attention. Lisa grumbled but relaxed, letting Jennie's grip on her hand relax her own fist.
"God I hate those fucking rats." Jennie said venomously. "They say such terrible things and think they're somehow improved by it. This is your prom as well."
Lisa couldn't help laughing at the voice and tone Jennie had suddenly taken, the way she bristled in her dress and makeup and jewelry.
Jennie relaxed visibly as soon as Lisa laughed, grinning, embarrassed, and for the first time in ages her teeth in full view, that full smile and Lisa forgot how to breath.
"You don't have to," Jennie was saying, still looking amused. "But Lisa, in light of that asshole, would you maybe do me the honour of a dance?"
Lisa laughed nervously. This was a bad idea for a hundred reasons.
"I would, but I don't really know how to dance." She shook her head. Jennie just smiled back to her, lifting her chin in the teasingly haughty way she used to.
"Well good thing you're friends with a Pinksy," she smirked a little. "We're forced to learn many dances."
Lisa snorted before she could stop herself and Jennie smiled, grinned, before reaching out to take one of Lisa's hands. She gently guided it to her arm, just below the shoulder and Lisa couldn't help tensing up, even with her gloves on, barely hovering her palm with just her fingers touching the bare skin of Jennie's arm. With a smile and a sigh, Jennie took Lisa's other hand in hers, smiling. "Relax." She said, with a slight nervous laugh.
Yeah, Lisa couldn't do that.
Jennie pushed the hand holding Lisa's backward slightly, pushing Lisa to take a step back, and then turned her slightly to push her back another step, before pulling her in as Jennie stepped back. It took a second, Lisa stepped on Jennie's feet a couple of times and they laughed and shrugged and nervously picked things back up, and then soon they were moving smoothly together to the music, the crowd around them.
It felt... nice. To be moving like this with Jennie.
To admit to herself she missed this.
"That's it, you're getting it," Jennie smiled, watching their feet and tapping at Lisa's to keep them from stepping on hers.
A couple close by looked over at them as they danced, and the boy leaned forward to whisper something to the girl. The girl giggled, a nasty little sound, and they both sneered as they turned away. The girl muttered something else that made the two of them laugh.
Lisa's stomach dropped.
Spell broken, she tried to move back, pull her hands away from Jennie, but Jennie's fingers curled around hers and her other hand shot up to grab Lisa's and return it to her shoulder.
"Don't," Jennie said with a loud whisper, leaning in close so only Lisa could hear. "You're allowed to be here. You belong here too."
Lisa just swallowed, eyes darting around the dimly lit room. No one was looking at them right now, but she still felt too exposed, too much the centre of attention. One of Jennie's hands came up, gently pressing on Lisa's jaw to get her attention.
"Look at me," Jennie murmured, drawing Lisa's gaze to her own eyes. The lights from the mirror ball were reflecting in them, sparkling, almost like stars. She looked down before blinking slowly and looking back up.
The sound of someone else laughing startled her and Lisa stepped back, breaking free of Jennie this time, clearing her throat.
"It's, yeah, um." She chewed the inside of her cheek, shooting glares at the crowd around her without even checking whether or not anyone was looking. Jennie stood still, looking thoughtful and disappointed, biting her own bottom lip with her arms lightly crossed, running her fingers up and down her other forearm.
Lisa lifted her head, looking around. There had to be somewhere... the refreshment table had too many stragglers hanging onto it, the darker corners by the stage might be easier to stand in without getting bothered, but would be too loud. An eyebrow shot up when she saw a small door tucked behind the stage, wires running along the floor into it.
"C'mere." She smirked, lightly taking Jennie's hand and pulling her through the crowd.
Jennie went with her without questioning, weaving along the outer edge of the crowd. Lisa glanced around for Ella in the crowd but couldn't see her anywhere. Hopefully staying out of trouble.
Checking quickly that no one had spotted them, Lisa ducked beside and then behind the little stage setup with Jennie in tow, slipping into the back room where the equipment and spares for the dance setup were stored. It was, amazingly, empty and Lisa thanked whatever luck they had for it.
"I don't think we're supposed to be back here." Jennie said with almost a laugh as Lisa let go of her hand. She looked around the dark room, a nervous grin on her face.
"Yeah, you could fill a library with the things I've done I'm not supposed to do." Lisa grinned broadly, before a nervous worry passed through her. "But, uh, did you want to go? Does it bother you being here?"
"Does it bother you being out there?" Jennie asked in response, stepping up to gently touch one of Lisa's arms. The muffled electric noises of the music playing just outside with Jennie in front of her suddenly reminded Lisa of the other night they hid themselves from the party, muffled bass through the walls of a house as they stood in the shadows.
She swallowed.
"Well, we're supposed to talk. Right? Easier to talk in here." She justified, looking at Jennie for confirmation. Jennie's brows knitted in confusion, but she nodded.
"Well, I," Lisa scratched at the back of her head. "You said your bit already so I guess that's me. And I guess, yeah, I'm sorry for stuff. For not listening to you, thinking the same stuff Ella did about you lying. About, um, accusing you." She shifted on her feet, shoving her hands in the pockets of her dress pants. "Accusing you of... yeah."
Why was this so hard. She knew, was pretty sure, that Jennie actually liked her back. That Jennie was completely honest about that. That Jennie was as nervous and shy and wanted to- was- but fuck, some part of Lisa was so terrified of that answer being no, of being wrong, that she was completely misreading this because she was an idiot. An idiot who's brain went so fucking stupid for a pretty smile.
"Lisa," Jennie said, a shy, apologetic smile on her face and voice slightly breathless. "Everything I said that night was true."
Lisa just let out a nervous laugh in an exhale, neck hot and nerves buzzing.
Jennie was looking as anxious as Lisa felt right now, hands crossed in front of her as she seemed like she was about to say something else when the next song began to play just outside the door, a slow, romantic melody and Jennie paused.
"Oh," she said softly, "I love this song."
It took less than three seconds for Lisa to ask "Oh, did you want to dance to it?" without even thinking about it.
Lisa wasn't sure what it was about Jennie and how time seem to slow down around her, but there was the longest pause before she said something. It was hard to tell what Jennie was thinking, her face half in the shadows as the faint sparkles from the mirror ball danced around behind her, but she nodded and smiled and Lisa was suddenly, somehow even more nervous.
"I would love a dance." Jennie said softly, smiling and Lisa wished she could bottle this feeling like a drug, open it whenever she needed, because Jennie was smiling at her like that again and she couldn't imagine ever feeling anything else.
She reached out her hand to Jennie, who took it, rubbing a thumb against the glove as she did. Jennie looked down at their hands and then back up to Lisa. "Could-" she bit her lip. "Are you okay with taking these off?"
Heart pounding, Lisa nodded.
Slowly, even though the song was already on it's first chorus and the longer this took the less time they would have to dance, Jennie took Lisa's gloves off one hand, and then the other. She wordlessly handed the gloves to Lisa, who shoved them in her pocket with one hand as Jennie took the other, gently tracing her thumb along the the scars on it. Every gentle brush of her thumb was sending sparks through Lisa's arm and Lisa almost forgot where they were, what was going on around them.
Then Jennie slipped their hands together, pulled Lisa's other hand to her shoulder, and this time Lisa pressed her palm against Jennie's shoulder, and Jennie took a shaky breath and Lisa knew, knew Jennie was just as nervous as she was. With just enough bravado she winked to Jennie and they both let out chuckles.
They began dancing, stepping slowly to the beat of the song already halfway through, and Lisa didn't care that it meant they had barely any time, that this was only going to last a minute.
Jennie reached up with her hand not held in Lisa's and brushed aside a few loose strands of hair that had fallen in front of Lisa's face, her hand coming to rest for a second on Lisa's cheek, thumb absently stroking just ever so slightly.
Jennie's other hand tightened around hers briefly in a reassuring squeeze as they swayed together to the music, eyes locked on each other, and the hand on Lisa's cheek slowly slid to the back of her neck, fingertips stroking as the short hairs. The distance between them seemed to get smaller and smaller, until Lisa could feel Jennie's breath on her face, light little puffs and it became hard to keep her face in focus.
"Jennie," Lisa murmured.
Jennie's gaze lowered, her eyes now half-lidded and then Lisa felt their noses brush, softly at first and then more firmly as Jennie nudged Lisa to slightly move to a change of angle.
"Lisa?" She asked, impossibly quiet.
Lisa leaned forward slightly, asking her question even as she could feel the heat from Jennie's breath on her lips.
"Can I kiss you?"
After a second and an eternity, Jennie whispered back,
"Please."
//
double update cause you guys deserve it 🫶🏻