CH VI - strawberry milk
with death stares
☠️
If someone had told Risa a month ago that having dinner at her sister's house would be a regular occurrence, she'd probably laugh straight in their faces. Yet look at her now, sitting across from Sensei, her older sister, and her niece, with the most delicious meal in front of her (of course Hina was an amazing cook, damn her). She didn't know how, but the dinners slowly etched their way into her routine. Her older sister and sensei were insistent that she'd join them after training sessions. To Risa's horror, she finds herself expecting it and even enjoying it.
She tried to convince herself that she joins them because it's the polite thing to do, but she had to admit that it's nice getting to view her older sister in a way that isn't so callous. When Hina is around the family she built, she smiles because she means it, not out of necessity.
It's still strange to Risa that families can sit down. together and eat because they want to. She gets front-row seats to the dynamics that they have together, it sort of makes Risa believe that she's been sitting with them her entire life.
"Risa you haven't ate any of your food." Hina points out snapping Risa out of her depressing daze.
Another new development in the past month besides the dinner: Hina actually cares now. Not to say that she didn't before in her own strange way. It's no longer that quick catch-up during the monthly gatherings that were painful for the both of them. It's the little things. If Risa's shirt is wrinkled, Hina will notice and straighten it; she'll give Risa words of praise rather than criticism. Hina will even laugh at some of her lame attempts at jokes and even pass some herself. It'd be a lie if she said she doesn't like this type of attention from someone she loathes yet places on a pedestal; still, it's uncomfortable. It's strange to be treated like a human being; after years of rejection from her older sister, she realizes how easily it could have been like this all along. Hina just chose not to. So Risa wants to play it safe; she keeps her guard up despite the fact that part of her wants to soak up all of Hina's affection as long as she has it.
Risa stares down at her plate, chewing on the inside of her cheek. She hasn't had much of an appetite; she knows that the warning signs should be screaming in her face; they're practically nothing to her ears; this just means that it's working. Risa decides that she could probably take a couple of bites so her older sister doesn't become suspicious.
"Oh yeah," Risa chuckles. "I'm sorry, I'm just tired."
She stabs her food with the chopsticks, forcing herself to take a bite and swallow. Ignoring the pain coursing through her body as she performs what is supposed to be a simple task, To distract herself, her brown eyes land on Sensei, who seems awfully bothered. They make eye contact, and Risa thinks she knows what the root of the problem is. "How's Asahi doing?" She asks for her own curiosity.
She set off a chain of reactions. Sensei practically seethes. "He's impulsive; he's distracting, lazy, arrogant—." The tangent continues with everything that is wrong with her cousin, and he even points out things that Risa didn't catch on to about Asahi. She would be using this to her own advantage against him.
Her older sister giggles softly, hitting Yaga with her hand. "Don't be rude to my cousin." She defends. "I think it's a good thing that he's working under you to gain the ropes. The future seems bright; he has an interesting technique, and plenty of students are going to want to learn from him, especially Satoru."
Risa's attention zones in on the mention of her former classmate, given the fact that Hina is on a first-name basis with him. "He's going to be a teacher?" She questions, confused, why Asahi didn't mention it since he raves about how attractive Gojo is when he gets the chance. Not that Risa disagrees, but her cousin does it in the most annoying way possible.
Yaga nods in response his jaw clenching at the mention of him.
She doesn't see the point in why he has any interest in the position. He'd manage just fine being a sorcerer; in fact, he'd soar being the strongest man in the world and all. He doesn't strike her as the nurturing type, especially with how rude he was during their last interaction. She's truly scared for the future sorcerers that will be enrolled for the new school year. She becomes all worked up again over their interaction. What an asshole getting to do whatever he wants. She hopes he knows that it's a legitimate job and not just another way of proving how strong, amazing, and beautiful he is.
Risa takes another bite, instantly regretting it; she didn't prepare herself for it. She tries to focus on anything to ignore the pain, then her eyes go to Misa, who sits boredly in black overalls with a sunflower design on them. Risa inhales, swallows, then smiles. She would have loved those overalls when she was Misa's age. "Those are so cute, Misa!" She compliments.
Misa glares at her from across the table, trying to keep herself awake from lack of sleep. Hina nudges her daughter. "Misa, your aunt just gave you a compliment."
"Huh?" Misa processes. "Oh. Thank you."
Her older sister runs her hands through Misa's black hair. "I think she wanted them because she sees all the ones you wear."
Risa can't tell if it's supposed to be one of Hina's way of showing affection. Either way, Risa doesn't want to give in, Hina needs to know I don't have any feelings. "Do I really wear that many overalls?"
Hina frowns, thinking her comment is misinterpreted. "I—that's not a bad thing. I think you have quite the selection, right, Masamichi?" She looks at her husband for support.
Yaga chokes on his food, then swallows. He nods rapidly. "Oh yes. I like the blue ones you have."
"I don't have blue ones." She says flatly.
The color on Sensei's face drains, not knowing how to respond. Her older sister stares daggers at him. "I-uh." He shifts uncomfortably under Hina's gaze. "I could have sworn—"
She can't take it anymore; Risa drops the act and starts laughing. Her older sister and Sensei are both severely thrown off by her sudden change in demeanor. "I'm joking." She finally admits.
The two of them let out a big breath of relief. "Oh!" Hina sighs. "Oh okay." They start nervously laughing with her.
"You guys are so weird." Misa states.
They finished their meals, and Risa pretended like she finished hers as well. She moved with Hina into the kitchen to help her wash the dishes.
"You don't have to do that," Hina tells her, while Risa finishes the dish and passes it to her to dry. "You could just go home."
It's not my home. "No, it's okay. I'm happy to help." She reassures.
Hina relents, and the two continue the system they've made. Risa washes; Hina drys. She gets lost in her own thoughts, not noticing her older sister side-eyeing her. Hina clears her throat. "I notice that you have trouble with your hair when we're training." She starts off.
Risa freezes only for a moment, then goes back to normal, so it doesn't raise any red flags for Hina. It's true, her hair has been a bother to her; it's been that way since she was five. Risa's accepted the fact that she's never really going to be able to take care of it unless she visits her mother. "It's not a problem." She says quickly, hoping her older sister will drop it.
Hina, let's let the silence consume them. Risa thinks for a moment that the subject is over, then her older sister adds. "I could help you out."
Risa fully stops washing the pot in her hands, despite her mind telling her that she needs to act normally. "Help me out now?" She asks slowly.
"Like with your hair." Hina responds. "I can help you with it if you want; I know it can be a hassle."
Risa's grip on the pot that she's washing is so tight that she thinks she could bend it. She's offering to help. Now? Where was this offer years ago when Risa's hair would get stuck in the brush and she was so scared to ask anyone for help that she'd have to pull it off herself? "No. I'm fine." She says through gritted teeth.
Hina senses the hostility yet thinks she should continue. "Are you sure? I think I could."
Risa drops the pot, and it hits the sink with a loud clank. She finally turns to her sister. "So have you always known how to take care of hair?" She asks, furious. "Or is it something you learned how to do recently? I'm just curious where you learned because no one's ever taught me before."
Hina doesn't reply; for once, she's left stunned.
Risa takes a shuddering breath. Of course. Hina is treating her the same way she treats her brothers after years of silently begging for it. All this time. All this fucking time she has been capable of loving her like a sister; she knew she could; she just didn't want to. Is there something so deeply wrong with Risa that no one could ever love her in a proper way?
"I'm backkkkk!" Masura sings, hugging Hina's legs.
Hina gasps, looks down at Masura, puts on a smile, and ruffles through his hair. "Hi, my love! How was it with your friends?!"
"It was so cool they have a big dog, Mama; we should get one!"
Hina shakes her head. "No, you already know Panda is scared of dogs."
"Awwwww Mama! I'll make sure they won't rip him up!"
☠️
Risa stares up at the ceiling, The Pixies blasting in her ears from her iPod. She's figured out that sleep isn't going to succumb her any time soon, which means the longer she's awake, the more time is wasted, which could be furthering her progress. While yes, it's true that Hina gave her an entire lecture about the harms that come with overworking yourself, Risa wouldn't call it that; it's different; it's not like she's exhausted or anything; this is just called being productive with your time.
She gets out of bed, slipping on a pair of sweatpants and a plastic tree band hoodie Asahi had gotten her for her birthday, along with a pair of her most comfortable shoes. She almost trips over one of the boxes she still hasn't unpacked on her way out of the shed, but she makes it out alive. She pulls out one of her earbuds that's playing Tame to make sure she doesn't hear her cousins roaming around. It's silent. Risa didn't think the household was ever capable of that.
It signals that the coast is clear, like she's been doing for the past month. Risa turns on her cursed energy. Her older sister is right; it really did feel like second nature once she found a way to produce it. She stares at her purple shade in fascination, moving her hand around her eyes and going wide as it flows with the movement. "So cool." She whispers. She really hasn't had a chance to actually marvel at what her body can do now.
I mean, come on, this is coming out of her body, and it's purple! She's dreamed of being able to do this since she first saw her older brothers do it, and the fact that she can just do it on command is fucking incredible. She runs around the yard quietly, laughing to herself as her cursed energy follows her; it reminds her of a shadow.
She practices all the movements her older sister has been teaching her. Realizing halfway through that, she's mirroring the moves that Hina used with her own emotion when she was a socerer. She's envious of those who got to bear witness to Hina during her sorcery days. She only got glimpses of it when she was a kid, when Hina was helping out her brothers with their own techniques that correlated with their emotions. Her old room's window is pointed directly at the garden in the Tachi Estate, so she'd always watch the four of them work together, though the memories are blurry now. She distinctly remembers that Hina's cursed energy is red, and she moved at an alarmingly fast rate.
She is feeling the exhaustion course through her body. Fuck, she thinks to herself before she collapses on the ground, cheeks pressed against the grass, her iPod now shuffled Monkey Gone to Heaven. Risa turns over, laying on her back and staring up at the night sky. A sudden crazy but compelling thought goes through her head.
Maybe I can convince Hina to show off one day.
She chuckles, closing her eyes. Yeah right.
☠️
She wakes up on the grass with her cousin Aki staring down at her with a puzzled expression on his face. She tries to hide her discomfort by putting a small smile on her face. "Good morning."
"I thought you were dead." Aki replies as Risa gets up from the ground. It alarms her that his first instinct when discovering a dead body was to stare at it rather than freak out or call for someone.
Risa chuckles. Maybe her cousin might have been just joking, but the serious expression on his face says otherwise. "Why were you asleep on the ground?" He immediately follows after pronouncing her dead.
She says the first excuse that pops into her mind. "I went for a run."
"So you fall asleep on the grass?" Aki interrogates.
Do any of these kids mind their business? It's like having another Asahi, something she'd never wish upon a child. "I was too tired to go back to my shed." She doesn't think she'll ever get used to saying that. Aki has enough mind in him to stop asking questions; he runs away without saying goodbye.
Weird. Risa stares down at herself; her white sweatpants have grass stains, her hair is poofy, and she doesn't want to imagine what ever made its way into her curls while she was asleep. She opens the door to her shed. She starts peeling off her clothes and throws them in the dirty pile, reminding herself she needs to do laundry as the amount of time she's put it off is quite concerning.
She's in the middle of imaginary drumming; Big Mouth Strikes Again while bushing her teeth when her phone buzzes. She lets out a noise of disappointment and grabs her phone.
Hina: werging2jjhi
What the fuck? Risa tries to decipher the text, then gives up after two minutes texting back.
What.
Hina had apparently recently decided to get rid of the technology-free mindset she has and purchased the latest model. Of course she did, and she had been figuring out how to work the phone. It's clear the side lessons Risa has been giving her on how to navigate the phone haven't been working. Her older sister calls immediately after Risa sends the text.
"Hel—." She says, sounding muffled with the toothbrush and paste still in her mouth.
"We're going to Jujustu High. I'm picking you up in thirty minutes. Goodbye."
Hina promptly ends the call, leaving Risa dumbfounded. "Okay." She accepts, trying to ignore the drop in her stomach because Jujustu High was mentioned in the fast call, and Risa convinces herself that maybe she misheard. Not Jujustu High, no way.
☠️
Yes way.
She sadly trails her older sister across the campus. She gathers that if she acts sad, maybe Hina will feel bad, and they could leave. It's a childish idea, as Hina didn't notice, and Risa decided to give herself a pat on the back for at least giving it a shot. She ignores each area they pass by as they hold memories that Risa's been trying to forget exist; it reminds her of this aching loneliness that she'll never be able to get away from, and Jujustu High is that feeling at its strongest. Hina is chattering about something to which Risa can't pay attention because she's trying to make herself feel comfortable in this place.
She attempts to see a different side of being here. It means that her sister trusts her enough to train somewhere outside her house. Though she'd rather be at Hina's place than here, anything is better than here.
"And we're here!" Hina says cheerily. Risa looks up at this shed, that they stand in front of him. Frowning that it reminds her so much of her own.
"What's this?" Risa asks, noticing that it certainly looks nicer than her own.
"You've never been here before?" Her older sister walks in and flips the switch. Risa is suddenly surrounded by several types of weapons mounted on the walls. What the fuck?
"Never had a reason to." Risa answers as she marvels at the amount of cursed energy pouring into this room.
"You're here now." Hina tries to lighten up the mood. "I did tell you there were other ways you could become a sorcerer; having a weapon with cursed energy is one of them, and since you've been improving at a fascinating rate, I think it's time for you to have one so we can start working with it."
A weapon, huh? She's seen socerers before use cursed tools to assist them with exorcising; whenever Risa imagined herself as one, she never thought about using a cursed tool. She feels it would be more genuine if she were defeating curses without any type of assistance, but this is another way: if her older sister thinks it's best, then it probably is who is she to argue with the expert?
"I have one that I think is perfect for you." Hina informs her as she scans the walls for the weapon.
Risa raises her eyebrows. "Isn't the whole appeal of this that I choose my own weapon?"
Hina tenses. "Oh well, you can—but—"
"I'm fucking with you."
Her older sister looks like she's going to faint; her breathing relaxes. "Please stop doing that." She requests quietly. Her older sister nearly jumps when she finds what she's looking for. She grabs the large knife on display and spins around with a big grin on her face.
It's a beautiful knife, with the blade being needle point and the handle having roses on it. On Hina's other hand, she held a pouch that has a similar design as the handle. The knife is familiar to Risa, but she can't place why.
That's until Hina says. "This is the weapon I used to use when I was a sorcerer."
Risa lips part, she remembers. Hina was so fast that you could hardly see the thing when she was using it. "My mother gave it to me when I was a little girl; she said that it's been passed down for generations in the Inumaki clan. I stored it here when I retired, but now I think it could be put to good use."
The thought of anything coming from Izumi, no matter how heartfelt her older sister means it to be, makes Risa sick. She knows she should be elated out of everyone her sisters trained; she's choosing Risa to pass down the knife. Still, it was Izumi's, the stepmother, who trained her to be an obedient dog to show off.
This is not how it's supposed to be; having this weapon means that, in a way, Izumi is assisting her on a path to become a sorcerer, and that is the last thing that Risa wants. "Is there something wrong?" Hina interjects her thoughts with a worried tone. The guilt eats her away; when she meets her older sister's eyes, she can tell that this means a lot to Hina; Risa's rejection would wound her.
She stares at the knife; it's amazing, but it's not meant for her. I could make it my own, she thinks, trying to assure herself of her own decision. "No, I'm in shock," Risa half lies (she is in shock). "I saw you with this so many times that I just never thought I'd see it again."
"Now it's yours." Hina says warmly. "Do you want to hold it?"
No. Risa bites back her tongue from rejecting, Make it your own. She takes the knife, holding it with ease.
"It suits you." Hina reaches out a hand to Risa, initially intending to put a strand of one of her curls behind her ear.
Risa mistakes it for something else, she flinches away from Hina's touch, instantly regretting it when she sees a flash of hurt on her older sister's face. Hina attempts not to let it show. "Should we get started?" She suggests breaking the tension, and Risa couldn't be more grateful.
"Uh yeah." She agrees, and Hina exits past her out of the shed. Risa glances down at the knife in her hands one last time before making her leave.
At one point, this belonged to Izumi when she was Izumi Inumaki, not the evil stepmother who takes joy in her husband's instability and monitors her children, especially the ones that come from her husband's affair. Risa hopes that she sucked at using it.
The only perk about Jujustu High is that, besides being a headquarters for other sorcerers, it can practically be a ghost town because of the rarity of seeing cursed spirits. Without raising suspicion, they successfully went into one of the many large training rooms at the very end of the school halls. Hina claims that practically no one came to this side.
Her older sister starts off by explaining the different ways she used the weapon when she was a sorcerer. "Maybe you can give me a demo?" Risa tests out. Remembering the thought she had before she passed out on the grass the night before.
She's only met with a stare that is abundant. No, never ask me that again.
Risa's able to get the hang of the weapon without any trouble, much to Hina's dismay. It's hard not to see that her older sister gets visibly uncomfortable with the way that Risa has picked up everything she's taught her. When she effortlessly aims the knife straight into the dummy's head, Hina's eyes go wide. Just when Risa is about to retrieve the knife, her older sister blocks her.
"We're taking a break." She declares.
"Why? I'm not tired."
"We're taking a break." Her older sister repeats, grabbing her hand and rushing her out of the room at such a speed that Risa can't grasp what is going on until she is pushed down on a bench and strawberry milk is pushed into her hands that Hina pulled out of her bag.
"Drink." Hina instructs.
Risa does it without thinking twice. She certainly gets the tone from Izumi, though, in a way that's less scary. Hina plants herself in the empty space on the bench next to her, zoning in on Risa, waiting for her to finish every single drop of that carton. She continues, even though she finds it incredibly strange that her older sister is watching her with the look of death in her eyes. She finishes the milk as quickly as possible and gives the empty cart to Hina to dispose of.
"Did you bring snacks?" Risa asks when her sister throws the carton away in the trash across from them.
Hina doesn't answer the question, then accusingly says, "Risa, have you been taking breaks?"
Now Risa wonders if her older sister has been keeping eyes on her at all times. Technically, no, she hasn't been taking breaks; it's only because she doesn't feel like she needs it. Risa would if she felt it was necessary; her body doesn't feel worn out; she's just taking advantage of that. "Sure I do." She answers with a shrug.
Hina leans toward Risa's face, focused. "I can tell when people lie."
Risa leans away. "Well, obviously you can't because I'm not lying."
"Risa, it's important to let your body rest. You aren't fully used to it either."
She's had enough of Hina trying to play mother; Risa cuts off her lecture. "Literally, what does it matter to you?! I'm obviously doing fine."
"That's what worries me!" Hina puts a hand on her chest to calm herself down. "Risa, you know if you need anything, you can talk to me. That's what I'm here for."
She doesn't understand where this "I'm here for you." bullshit is coming from. Why does she care now? "Oh sure!" Risa says in a high-pitched tone. "I'll let you braid my hair, then we can sing silly little songs together and wear matching outfits. How about we start with singing super girls? That one might be fun."
"Don't joke about this, Risa." Hina warns. "You're my little sister."
Risa laughs at how stupid that sounds. "Okay."
"Excuse me?" Hina says her temper is flaring up. "What is that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing big, sister." Risa says innocently. "The more that I keep this up, the faster I get what I want, and the faster you can get rid of me."
Her older sister's eyes go wide. "What makes you think that I want to get rid of you?" She says it as if she's never wanted Risa gone before.
She'll never get it. Risa decides to end this; she doesn't want to start any more problems than she already has, and her feelings getting in between them wouldn't help anyone, especially herself. "Hina. I'm getting sleep, I'm taking breaks, and I eat when I'm hungry. I'm okay. I'll tell you when I'm just. Just trust me." She pleads.
It seems the last hint pulled something within Hina to let this go. "Okay, I trust you. I'm sorry." She apologizes. There's silence between them. Hina pulls out her own drink of strawberry milk.
"Will you let me braid your hair one day?" Risa is barley able to make out what Hina says.
She can't tell if she's being serious or not. "Would you even be able to?"
"I think I could." Hina replies, taking another sip of strawberry milk.
"Whatever." Risa smoothes over into another topic. "Does that cursed weapon have a name?"
Hina nods. "It's called limb."
"Limb?" Risa repeats. Wow, even her new weapon has a dumb name, it's going to be very hard for her to even like her weapon. Right now, all Risa can focus on is trying to tolerate the thing.
Her older sister hums. "When mom gave it to me, she told me that the first user cut through the limbs of a person, and the name just stuck."
"So a person has been killed with that knife before? I have a murder weapon." She shouldn't be taken aback; it makes sense that Izumi owned something that would be linked to that.
"I think that's the least strange thing you could own in our world."
"Well, well, hello ladies." Now Risa felt nothing but dread go through her own limbs. No, it can't be; she wants nothing more than to just roll on the ground and fully have a tantrum. Her cousin stands in front of them like the piece of shit he is.
Hina smiles politely, still blissfully unaware of his antics. "Hello Asahi."
"What brings the two of you here today?" It's normal to ask, but Risa knows the undertones it has. She's told Asahi pretty much everything that she's been doing with Hina; he'd never miss the opportunity to be a bastard and use that for his own personal gain.
"We're just hanging out today," Hina says casually.
Her older sister is a terrible liar; there wasn't any way that anyone in the Tachi Clan would believe that they'd spend their free time together. Asahi grins, sparing a glance at Risa. "Really! A nice girls day!"
"I suppose it is yes."
"In Jujustu High, though? Doesn't that seem boring?" He tilts his head to the side. Risa wants to punch him.
By the look that Hina has on her face, she's beginning to understand Sensei's complaints at the dinner table. "There's a lot to do here if you put your mind to it."
She really hopes they never encounter anyone else together besides Asahi; she cannot be convincing.
"Like what?" He claps his hands together, waiting.
"Uhm—shouldn't you be getting back to what you're doing? My husband might be looking for you."
Asahi shakes his head. "No, no, I have plenty of time."
"Asahi, leave her alone." Risa mumbles.
Hina finds a way to excuse herself, saying that she should find her husband. She gives Risa a signal that they aren't done yet, then escapes from her cousin's clutches; she admires her for it.
"Was that really necessary?" Risa rolls her eyes.
"Duh. You know I get the most energy from the adults in our family. They just give into anything, but your sister doesn't; it's annoying." He says dramatically.
"I have a knife now." She tells him.
"You have a what?"
She grins; she didn't think about the aspect of being able to say that she owns a cursed weapon. "Do you want to see it?" As well as show it off.
"I'm offended you're even asking me; of course I want to see it." Asahi scoffs.
She pulls it out of Hina's bag; he studies. "Isn't that the one your sister—"
"Used to use yup." She finishes.
"Can I hold it?"
"Absolutely not." Risa says.
"I promise I'll be gentle with it!" He begs.
"No." Risa says again, placing limb back in the bag. A thought forms in her mind, and she smiles. "I could show you a new move I learned."
a/n: happy happy new years! editing this chapter was a pain in my ass because how the fuck do you not use "and,but,yet" in every sentence 😭😭
☠️the ending is a bit rushed bc guess what gojo was supposed to be in this chapter but it didn't rlly work for what im going for w him so no gojo. the world is healing.
☠️ is gojo the hottest person risa has ever seen? yes. does she also not give a fuck about gojo? yes!
☠️ risa being a continuous liar to herself and others will never not be entertaining for me to write. she's so messy i love her, her infj is very much showing, and yes I did take a personality quiz for her!
anyways hopefully you found this chapter a little entertaining things will be picking up next chapter! happy holidays & new years everyone my resolution is to read 12 books. will i actually do that? mmmm idk...
much love,
foggy 😶🌫️