𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐇 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐓. When he was a kid, the only person that he had ever wanted to be was Sebastian Clairmont. Growing up, he saw how everyone treated Sebastian, the way that even as a young boy, he was always the one that people could count on. Nathan was slightly embarrassed to admit that he had looked up to his older cousin for most of his life. Even now, despite the fact that Sebastian didn't even really like him, they spent all of their time fighting with one another. Even now, as the two of them stood in the middle of his apartment, waiting for Celia to get home for her surprise party, the two couldn't help but bicker. Look, Nathaniel knew that the two of them led entirely different lives, and that they would never understand each other. However, Nathan longed for the friendship that they'd had when they were kids, before their families tried to pit them against each other, before they were so different that they didn't recognize the other.
Most people found it hard to believe that the two of them were best friends when they were younger, but it was the truth. Sebastian Clairmont was his favourite person in the world. When he first went into school and the teacher asked him what he'd wanted to be when he grew up, and while everyone else said they wanted to be doctors or lawyers, Nathan told his teacher that he wanted to be like his big cousin. But things were different now, they had grown up a lot since then, but Nathanial still wasn't quite sure what it was he wanted to do with his life. It was one of the many things that the two of them enjoyed fighting about. Maybe it was Seb's own way of caring, but he was as hard to get a read on these days as a brick wall. There was a time when Nathan was convinced that the two of them were telepathic, but Nate wasn't as confident in his ability to read the eldest Clairmont's mind anymore.
"What do you even eat?" Sebastian questioned, scrunching his nose up in disgust as he raided his pantry. "You don't have any food here." Nathan shrugged, tying off a yellow balloon and setting it down on the floor. "Don't tell me you can't afford to buy groceries because I know that's not true."
"I have food," he protested, walking over to open the cabinet where he kept the limited amount of food that he could actually cook. "And takeout does exist, you know." Sebastian looked absolutely disgusted by the contents of his pantry, and the wide variety of sugary treats and boxed foods. "Do you have anything in here that's even part of a food group?" Nathan rolled his eyes. His cousin likes to micromanage everyone and everything they do. That never really did change, now that he'd thought about it. "Of course," Nathan replied, "Only the most important food groups, the desserts." This time when he'd gone to tie off the balloon, it slipped from his grasp and flew around his kitchen before coming to a stop on Sebastian's leather shoes. "Do you take anything seriously?" He asked in exasperation, like he was wondering why he'd even bothered in the first place.
"Not usually," he replied lightly, trying to ignore the gnawing feeling in his chest that told him he was a disappointment. That he was the only one in his family who didn't have his life together. Sebastian was a CEO, Celia had her business, and what did he have? The answer was nothing. He didn't regret anything about his life, but he couldn't shake the feeling that told him he was a fuck-up in comparison to everyone else. Sebastian liked to remind him of that every chance he got. Seb muttered something under his breath then glanced at his watch, "She should be getting home soon."
Nathan couldn't help but snort, "You know there's no way that Cece's gonna be surprised right?" Margot was loyal to Celia before she was loyal to either one of them. She'd spill the beans, he was certain of it. "Margot's going to spoil the surprise. I'd be willing to put down money for it."
"I think you're wrong," he replied, finishing up the last of the stuff for the party. Nathan smirked, "Fifty bucks says she blabs about it," he wagered. He wasn't expecting Sebastian to even consider the offer, but as he watched his eyes narrow, he wondered if he was actually going to take him up on the offer. "I'll take that bet," he agreed after a brief moment of silence, and then offered his hand out to shake, which was in proper Sebastian Clairmont fashion. "And since we're speaking about Margot..." he trailed off, looking at Nathan like he was expecting him to fill in the blanks.
"Yeah, what about her?" Nate asked nonchalantly. The girl had unexpectedly had a change of heart towards him, after all of the years that he'd spent wondering when he'd finally wear her down. Margot had hated him for reasons unbeknownst to him, but it seemed like maybe he was finally getting somewhere with her after all this time wondering if they could ever be more.
"Is she your girlfriend?" He asked bluntly. There was no beating around the bush with Sebastian Clairmont. He knew what he wanted to say and he'd said it. He knew that his cousin suspected something from the time in Celia's hospital room when Margot had been perched on his lap during Uno, with his arm around her waist. "So what if she is?" He replied casually. They hadn't technically put a label on it, but he wasn't stupid enough to say that to Seb. That would just earn him a lecture on how reckless it was to fool around with his cousin's assistant. "I thought you weren't a relationship guy."
"People change, Seb," he replied, hoping to convey the message that was: you changed, after all. Sebastian reminded Nathan of their grandfather, which was both a good thing and a bad thing. "What makes you think I'm incapable of having a girlfriend?" Margot wasn't his girlfriend, but he wanted to entertain the idea that she was. Seb had something he wanted to say, and he wanted to know what it was. "I've seen you with women, Nathaniel. You know the answer to that."
"I get it, okay?" He snapped, gripping the edge of the counter with a sigh. "You think I'm immature, and I don't take anything seriously. Alright, I know what you think of me, Seb. But it's not like that with her." Nathan knew he was a screw-up, he knew that he was the guy in the family that couldn't be taken seriously. He spent his entire life being the butt of the joke so he could fit the description that everyone had given him. Celia was the angel, and Sebastian was the shark, but Nate? Nate was merely the outcast, the black sheep of the family. For once, he wanted everyone in his life to stop thinking the worst of him. He wanted Sebastian to think that he was capable of taking something seriously, that he wasn't a total flake. Sebastian thought that he wasn't mature enough for a relationship, and he wanted to prove him wrong.
"I just hope you realise what you're getting into," he warned. "I'm just suggesting that you tread carefully, is all. That's Cece's best friend," he advised, and the warning was clear. "She's always going to be in her life, in our lives. Don't go there with her if you're planning on breaking her heart." Nathan couldn't even be hurt by the assumption that he was going to toss her aside and break her heart. He had every reason to think that, because Nathan had done those things in the past. But he wanted to scream at Sebastian "what makes you think I'm going to break her heart? What if she's the one to break mine? Why do you always think the worst of me?" But he didn't say any of those things, because he knew it would start a fight, and tensions were already at an all time high. It was Celia's birthday, so he'd put on a happy face and act like Sebastian's words didn't phase him. It was what he did best, after all. "I know what I'm doing," Nathan assured him. Not that it was any of his business anyways. What happened between him and Margot was exactly what he'd said: between him and Margot. He had no business interfering and offering his opinion.
Especially since the two of them were in agreement. Margot had said that the two of them were just having fun. They weren't dating, and he wasn't her boyfriend. They were casual hookups, friends with benefits- though it seemed like the term friends was cutting it close. The sex was good, and Margot was one of the only people in the world who knew what to expect from him. Maybe he could see himself in a serious relationship with her, despite the fact that she was the only person in the world to get on his nerves. Maybe he was finally ready to be an adult, and settle down. It was time for him to get his head on straight and finally just fucking do something useful with his life. Sure, he could get on the first flight out to Europe and stay there until the funds of his trust fund died out (which would be an incredibly long time), but he didn't want to do that. He didn't want to be the person that was unreliable, and was never there. With his parents in prison, he wanted to spend most of his time with the only family he had left. He wanted both Cece and Sebastian to know that they could count on him. He might not be Sebastian, but he was capable of not being a total fuck-up either.
"If you insist," he replied, but his tone gave Nathanial the idea that he was really saying "do you really know what you're getting into?" Before Nathan could dwell on his words any longer, Seb glanced at his cellphone, "They're on their way up now," he informed him, and the two of them got into position, turned the lights off, and waited for the moment that Celia walked inside and pretended to be surprised. The second that the lights turned on and Celia walked in with a big smile on her face, he knew that the jig was up.
"Wow!" She beamed, smiling so unnaturally big. "You guys didn't have to do all of this."
"I told you she'd spoil the surprise," Nathan said triumphantly. It felt nice to finally be right about something. He turned his head to face his cousin, just in time to watch him fork out a fifty dollar bill from his wallet and hand it over. "She's a shit liar."
"You bet against me?" She'd hit him hard in the shoulder, and he brought his free hand up to rub the spot with a small smile. "Can't help it, babe. We all know you can't keep secrets." He didn't miss the way that Celia and Sebastian exchanged a knowing glance amongst each other at his words. But he'd pretended not to see it, because again, none of their business. "What makes you think I told her?" She snapped, crossing her arms over her chest. "Cece would have never been happy to come home to a surprise party," Sebastian pointed out. He knew his sister better than anyone else in the world, and this whole thing was more Nathanial's vibe than hers. "But we appreciate your effort to at least try and seem like you're having fun."
"Because you knew I didn't want a party," she retorted. There was a quick knock at the door, and then the FBI agents were quick to invite themselves in and wish Cece a happy birthday. Nate recognized a few of them, but the first one he'd noticed was Spencer as he beelined for his cousin. He knew something was going on there, even if the two of them were too blind to notice it. His lips curled up into a smirk when she led him down the hall into the bedroom to "talk" for a bit. Nathan audibly laughed when he noticed the way that Sebastian's jaw clenched, and the way his eyes followed the two of them down the hallway, wondering if he should follow them. Despite the fact that Celia was now officially twenty-seven, and had been an adult for a significant amount of time, Sebastian still treated her like his baby sister. He was protective over her. That was just about the only thing that both Nathan and Sebastian could agree on. They might not have gotten along swimmingly in the last few years, but Celia was the final thread that was keeping their whole family together, and she probably didn't even realise it.
"Aren't you going to check and make sure the door isn't closed?" He asked, his tone teasing. He could have swore that he saw Sebastian's eye twitch when he'd said it, and through a clenched jaw, he replied by saying, "Nothing is going to happen in a house full of people." Oh, poor, naive Sebastian. He was so smart, yet so clueless sometimes. Nate snorted and shook his head, "How many times did I have a girl under the roof when everyone was at grandad's house?" The question seemed to genuinely throw him through a loop. "How am I supposed to know that?" He snapped, crossing his arms over his chest.
Only then did Nathan break out into a wide grin, ready to deliver his final blow onto a silver platter. "Exactly," he replied. He swore he saw a vein pop out in his neck, and he looked about ready to run down the hallway and interrupt them when Margot stepped in front of him and shook her head. "You'd be surprised at how quick it can be sometimes. I'm speaking from experience."
"Now that's just sad," she replied, shaking her head at him. "But there's nothing going on between them. Cece told me so herself."
"First of all, I was nineteen. My stamina has improved," he started, narrowing his eyes. She knew damn well better than anyone how good his stamina was, she was just playing coy. "Secondly, do you really believe anything that she says? There's been a whole lot of something going on between them for a while."
"Like you're one to talk," Sebastian muttered, which made Nate's ears perk up. He glanced over to see that Margot hadn't heard that little comment, which he was grateful for. Sure, okay, maybe it was obvious to everyone else that there had been something between the two of them all these years, but Nathan honestly just assumed it was blind hatred on his part. He never hated her, not really at least, but he was willing to play along if it meant that he'd get to talk to her every once in a while. She rarely ever spoke to him unless it was through some kind of insult. Besides, he found it entertaining to push her buttons, seeing as how easy it was to do so. Something about it- about her was so addicting to him, like he couldn't get enough. When they were together, it felt right, like something familiar. When he'd kiss her, it was like he had this itch in his brain, reminding him that it all just felt so natural to her. It was like a second nature, and he knew exactly where she liked his hands, and exactly the way she liked to be held. "Now would one of you go and fetch her, it's almost time for cake."
Nathaniel happily offered, since he was well overdue his payback after she'd barged in on his steamy moment in the supply closet. He didn't want to walk in on his cousin doing anything, but embarrassing her in the process would have been some kind of poetic justice. He knocked, hearing Celia's annoyed voice from inside the room, but he hadn't opened the door and walked in yet. "This is called knocking, Cece. It's what you typically do to announce your presence before barging into a room."
She was starting to grow annoyed with him, so instead of trying to piss her off anymore than he already had, Nathan cut to the chase and excused himself from the bedroom while the two lovebirds came out on their own time. When he re-entered the kitchen, Sebastian was pouring the champagne whilst Margot was cutting the cake, and the second he entered, Seb glanced up expectedly. "They said they'll be out in a minute. They were getting dressed when I found them." It was too easy at this point, pissing him off. These were the little things that Nate enjoyed. It was almost as fun to rile Seb up as it was to piss off Margot. Almost. Sebastian muttered something angrily under his breath and began distributing the champagne, leaving both Margot and him in the kitchen alone together.
"Why do you mess with him?" She demanded, positioning her hands on her hips, cocking her head at him. It was cute to watch her try and act all tough and controlling, because they both knew that the second he got his hands on her, that she wasn't the one in charge anymore. "We both know you were lying."
"Because picking on Sebastian is like taking candy from a baby," he replied, sticking his finger out to try and taste the frosting, but Margot slapped his hand away before he could make contact. "He's easy to rile up."
"You're an asshole," she grumbled, pulling the cake from his reach as she manoeuvred her way out of the kitchen just in time for Celia to blow out her candles whilst everyone sang to her. Once the cake was distributed, Margot retreated back into the kitchen to put it in the fridge, and he took the opportunity to follow her, grabbing her by the hips as she bent down to put the cake back in the fridge. She shut the door and turned to face him, swerving out of the way when he leaned down and tried to connect their lips. She held a finger up to his mouth, and with a smirk, she made the promise of "Later," she whispered, nudging him with her hip as she slid out from his arms. "Don't start something you have no intention of finishing, Nathaniel." Nathan blindly followed Margot into the living room, and curled up on the couch beside her, and it was him who took the initiative to link their arms together, and he didn't miss the way that she smiled when he did it, but quickly tried to hide it from him. All Nate could think when he saw that was "I want to keep making her smile like that" Margot was the kind of girl who had a pretty smile when she chose to use it, the kind of smile that could light up a room, or bring a man to his knees. Her smile wasn't something she shared with everyone; it was rare, like a total solar eclipse, a breathtaking event that graces the world's stage only once in a while, leaving those who witness it in awe of its exceptional and fleeting brilliance.
However, he couldn't fixate on it for too long because somewhere in his peripheral vision, he saw an even rarer sight. Sitting at the kitchen island, he saw Sebastian Clairmont actually smile. Not one of those polite smiles that he gave to his business associates, but a genuinely happy smile. Nathan tried to recall the last time he'd seen that, but it had been so long that he couldn't even remember. Their grandfather taught him to never wear his emotions on his face when they were children, and it was something that he had only gotten better at over the years. Celia and Margot didn't seem to think it was as big of a deal as he did, which made him think for a moment that he might have been overreacting, until Nate remembered that he had never even seen Seb with a boyfriend before. It was like he had entered the Twilight Zone or something, where Sebastian was actually happy for once.
"I need a smoke," he announced. Truth be told, he had been trying to cut back, but his conversation with Sebastian earlier had only stressed him out, and he couldn't quite kick the craving. The first thing he noticed was the way that Margot's nose scrunched up the second he mentioned it, and the second thing he took note of was the way that Spencer opened his mouth to say something that he wasn't sure he needed to hear. He liked being in blissful oblivion. "Don't give me a statistic about the dangers of smoking. There are worse ways to die."
He didn't realize the implication of his words until he glanced over at Margot to see her shoulders tensed, but her face displayed no clear sign of emotions. He was an asshole, he knew that much. It was an insensitive comment to make in front of her, considering the nature in which her mother died. He should have just kept his mouth shut, but yet again, another instance where Nathan said the wrong thing.
"Don't expect me to go near you tonight if you smell like an ash tray." That was new, he thought to himself. Now, Nathanial knew that he'd lied to his cousin about Margot being his girlfriend, but he hadn't expected her to take the role of the nagging girlfriend so seriously. She rarely commented on his habit, but it seemed as though she was finally starting to come out of her shell. It only meant that she was more comfortable with bossing him around now. "Uh huh," Nathan replied, not even hiding his amusement. This girl couldn't keep her hands off of him, and the smell of smoke that occasionally lingered never bothered her before. "I'm sure it won't bother you later."
"There won't be a later if you go out there and smoke one of those things," she threatened, her eyebrows raised menacingly. It was as though she were daring him to go out there, so that she would have the pleasure of denying him later. But he knew she was bluffing. "I hate them." I know that, he immediately thought. "I really don't care," he lied. He did care, more than he wanted to. He cared about her in a way that he never even expected. This thing between them? Nathan never saw it coming, not in a million years. But he wasn't exactly mad about it either. He was silently grateful for the forces that brought her to him after all these years, because he never realized that she was exactly what he needed, and he'd just been looking in all the wrong places all this time.
"Fine," she declared after he grabbed the yellow lighter from his pocket.
That one word was enough to stop him right in his tracks, because he knew he was in deep shit with her now. He winced, running a hand through his hair, "No, don't say 'Fine'" He sighed, knowing that it never really meant fine. "Why not?" Margot demanded innocently, crossing her arms over her chest. "You want to have a cigarette? That's fine," she replied, emphasizing the word once more. He wasn't a complete idiot when it came to girls.
"Because Cece said that when a women said 'fine' that it never really means fine." His older cousin had taken the liberty of teaching him about respect since he was old enough to know what the word meant. She'd thrown around the word castration multiple times, and truth be told, he was scared of her sometimes. She rarely got angry, but when she did, she was like Hurricane Celia, destroying everyone in her path. "I mean it. Go have a smoke if you want one. I'll be in here enjoying the ability to actually breathe." She shrugged. Her words were verbally telling him to go, but everything about her body language was telling him to stay exactly where he was. And then she said the five words that made him realize he was completely and utterly fucked.
"I'm not your keeper, Nathanial." He had scoffed and brushed it off, and walked toward the screen door, but hesitated the second his hand touched the handle. Did he really want to get on her bad side so early when things were going good between them? The answer to that question was no. Growing annoyed, he huffed in annoyance and pocketed his lighter, and made his way back over to the couch with his head held high. Margot smile triumphantly as he lowered himself onto the ground in front of her, and when no one was paying attention, she gripped his shoulder and leaned forward, whispering into his ear quietly. "Good boy," she teased, a menacing smirk on his lips.
She had played him, and he fell for it like a goddamn fool. She had made him think that he was calling the shots, when she was the puppeteer the whole time. He couldn't say that he was mad about it either. But he knew, right then and there, that this girl was either going to be the best thing that ever happened to him, or Margot Greene was going to be the death of him.