"Hello?”
“Hey, Noah,” I say, not exactly sure what to go off with. I lightly and slowly tap my fingers on the soft yet stiff fabric of my jeans– index first, then middle, ring, and pinky last. “I just wanted to check to see how you’re doing. Are you feeling any better?”
I sense hesitation in Noah’s voice as he stammers out a quick, “Er, not really. I must have a stomach bug or something.”
I reach my previously drumming hand towards my neck and scratch the back of it. “I’m sorry to hear that. When do you think you’ll come back to school?”
“I’m not sure yet. You can never predict how long a sickness will last.” I trusted that logic. “I’ll need to rest, though, so would it be alright if I was left alone for a little while?”
“Y–Yeah, of course,” I promise him.
“Thanks.” Noah pauses, then ends the conversation with, “Bye.”
Before I can say anything else, Noah hangs up the phone. I stand awkwardly in front of my dresser for a few minutes before sighing quietly to myself. I shouldn’t be surprised at the way Noah’s behaving, considering recent events, but he’s usually open to talking to me about these things. That’s just the kind of person he is. While I’m not entirely sure what’s going on with him, I hope he’ll talk to me soon. He’s starting to worry me.
I jump at the sound of my bedroom door squeaking, indicating that someone is here to see me. I turn my head and visibly grimace at the sight of Brandon, who’s just as indifferent as ever.
“Grandma’s here to see you,” he says. His hands are shoved deep in the pockets of his basketball shorts. “She’s upstairs with Mom.”
I’m surprised for a moment, but I soon comply and pass my brother as I make my way upstairs. I hear faint chattering coming from the dining room. I feel a nervous pit in my stomach as I approach my female family members, having not a clue of how to go about this. I’m not exactly in the mood to talk a whole lot.
A short and stout woman with silver-grey hair pulled up in a bun is sitting on one of the several wooden chairs in the dining room, chatting with Mom. She's holding a long, yet small box, but I can't tell what it's for. As soon as I make my appearance known, the woman turns to me with a wide and excited smile on her face. She stands up almost immediately after noticing me.
"Caleb!" The woman welcomes me with warm arms as she wraps me up in a hug– after setting down the box, of course. "How are you, dear?"
Michelle Marsh– my grandmother and my dad's mother. She and I go way back. She used to babysit me and Brandon when we were younger, but then we got older. Luckily, she still visits because she loves us very much. Despite my urge to hide out in my room forever, I'm actually quite happy she decided to visit. I really missed her.
"Not that good," I reply honestly. I've learned that it's never a good idea to lie to Ma Michelle because she'll always find out about it anyway. Besides, she's not all that judgemental, so I'm not scared to tell her the truth.
"I heard about what happened and I came here to see how you were doing," Ma Michelle explains as she pulls me out of her grandma bear hug. Worry creases her wrinkled forehead. "My, you look just awful! I'm so sorry you have to go through this again."
Again? What does she mean by again? I raise an eyebrow with confusion written all over my face.
Ma Michelle snatches the box she brought from top of the dining room table and holds it up for me to see. "I brought you some of your favorite cereal, if that'll help any."
Cinnamon Toast Crunch, my favorite cereal. It may not look like it, but I'm a sucker for sugary foods, including cereal. I'm not sure when I'll eat this, but I'll definitely save it for when my insides don't feel like they're going to collapse.
I take the box carefully from her arms. "Thanks."
Ma Michelle gives me a kiss on my cheek and squeezes me once more. She smells of old person scent and lavender. It brings back old memories of when she'd teach me how to grow lavender trees in her front yard.
"Do you have school tomorrow?" she asks me.
I nod my head. "Yeah–"
Ma Michelle interrupts. Her hands are wrapped tight around my shoulders. "Well, forget about all of that! You're not going to school tomorrow."
I can sense Mom's uneasiness. "Michelle, are you su–?"
"Yes, I'm sure," Ma Michelle interrupts once again. She seems determined to win this debate. "Caleb needs some time away from all that's been going on, doesn't he?"
She presses both of her hands against my cheeks, making it almost impossible to speak for myself. "Just look at him! He's sad and longing for some bonding time with his grandmother."
I desperately want to shout, "No, I'm not!", but I know that wouldn't be the truth.
Ma Michelle gives me a light nudge in my side and gives me a look that tells me to give Mom a pouty face. Mentally sighing to myself, I obey and pout so big that anyone would probably think I was a homeless puppy in the streets.
Thankfully, Mom is convinced.
"Alright, do what you want with him as long as he remains caught up in school," she sighs as she returns to whatever household project she was working on. Ma Michelle silently cheers.
"I'll plan out something low energy for the two of us to do tomorrow, ok?" Ma Michelle asks for my approval as she ruffles my hair. "For now, do you want to just sit and talk for a little while?"
I'm still in shambles from that entire persuasion party. "Oh, yeah, of course."
Ma Michelle smiles warmly. "Perfect. Let's go sit on the couch. I'm not as strong as I used to be, and standing for too long can make me really tired."
As Ma Michelle leads me to the upstairs sofa, I glance over at the staircase and notice Brandon gazing at the two of us with a look of longing and jealousy shining in his dark eyes.
He's clearly not alright with this arrangement.
✣✣✣
The next day, I'm awake, but I'm not sure what time yet. A blinding ray of sunshine glares into my line of vision, forcing me to cover my burning eyes and let out a groan of misery and exhaustion.
It's too early for this… I grumble in my head.
A knock on my door makes itself present. Then, a voice follows. "Good afternoon, Caleb! Are you ready for your day out?"
Dang, it is not too early for this.
"Coming…" My voice comes out raspier than I expected, so I clear my throat as I groggily remove myself from my warm bed and slide a clean shirt across my pale torso. Then, after putting on a clean pair of jeans to go with it, I open the bedroom door and see Ma Michelle standing right outside the doorway, beaming at me.
"Are you ready to go?" she asks, holding an umbrella. I assume it's for blocking out the blistering sun's rays of light.
"Yeah," I agree, giving the back of my neck a quick scratch before following Ma Michelle upstairs and out the front door. Mom is working on another household project: repainting the bathroom door– its old paint has been chipped for a while.
Ma Michelle and I walk for a while until we reach the park. Then, she picks an empty bench to sit on and I join her. I don't want to encourage her to further damage her old lady joints.
"I'm so glad we get to spend this time together, Caleb," she begins, fidgeting with the hem of her shirt sleeve. I listen intently. "I realize I was joking around with you mother yesterday, but I genuinely want to know how you're dealing with this."
When I don't hear her going on, I answer her question. "It hurts a lot, you could say. We used to be close and we were barely reconnecting just the other week. Now… it's all over. It happened so fast."
Ma Michelle nodded solemnly. "I understand how difficult grief can be to get through. I felt the same way you're feeling when I lost your grandfather. Things have never been the same since he passed, but I've since gotten past all that."
I secretly wonder how that even applies to me.
Ma Michelle continues. "You never know if someone's death is going to be expected or unexpected, which makes experiencing grief even harder to deal with at first. It may take months or years to get over all that pain and heartache, but you'll feel better one day, and I hope I get to see you happy again before I pass on myself."
I'm not really sure what to say to that. My throat chokes up and my eyes fill up with petty tears.
Ma Michelle squeezes my shoulder. "You'll be alright again, I promise. And I'll be right here for you every step of the way."
✣✣✣
After our talk in the park, Ma Michelle walks me home. I check the time on my phone and notice that school has just barely gotten out. It makes me wonder how everyone is doing.
Then, as if right on cue, I get a phone call from someone. I don't recognize the number, but it's from someone in the state, so I answer it.
"Hello?"
"Oh! Er, hi!" A nervous and feminine voice comes through the other end of the phone. "It's me, Rosie Freeman. Is this Caleb Marsh?"
I almost lock my knees together and collapse on the carpeted floor. There's no way that's Rosie. It can't be!
"Yes, this is Caleb," I confirm. A more important question raises itself. "How did you get this number?"
I can hear Rosie getting nervous from the other end of the call. "I asked Joshua for it at school today, if you're ok with that. I didn't want to invade your privacy too much, but I also wanted to know how you were doing."
I guess that means Joshua went back to school.
"Yeah, no, you're totally fine," I reassure her. "I don't mind at all."
"Thank you!" Rosie says. "We missed you at school today. Where were you?"
"At home," I answer. "My grandma's over right now, and she got me to stay home today."
"Ooh, that sounds like fun!" Rosie bubbles. "Your grandma must be super nice."
I smile with a bit of blush creeping to my face. "Yeah, she is."
We're both silent for a few moments.
Finally, I clear my throat. "Well, it looks like my mom is calling me. I'd better get going."
Of course, Mom wasn't really calling me over. I just felt too flustered to have a normal conversation with Rosie.
"O–Oh, that's alright!" Rosie promises. "I'll talk to you later, ok?"
I nod my head, even though she can't see me. "Alright. I'll talk to you later."
"Bye!"
"Bye."
Rosie hangs up the phone. I stand in the upstairs hallway by myself for a while, processing what in the world just happened. Did Rosie Freeman just call me on the phone?
"Who was that, Caleb?" Ma Michelle appears out of nowhere and stands beside me.
"A girl in my grade," I say, not wanting to leak too much information.
Ma Michelle smirks teasingly, making me feel uncomfortable. "She sounds like a lovely girl."
Before I can release myself to my room, she keeps talking. "Now, before you go dreaming about this girl tonight, I have a word of advice."
I'm just getting more and more embarrassed the more she talks to me about Rosie.
"Relationships are wonderful and important to each individual human being on this planet, but it'll only work out better for you if you're ready for one."
"Hm?" I tilt my head to the side a little.
"If you jump into a relationship way before you've decided you're ready for one, it could lead to serious consequences," Ma Michelle warns.
I nod my head as a way to show her that I am indeed paying attention to what she's saying. "Alright, I will, Ma."
I tell myself I'm promising her something I mean, but I'm probably just feeding her an empty promise instead. I'm completely unaware of what being "ready" for a relationship feels like. Isn't getting into a relationship only going to make me feel better about my current predicament anyway?
"Good night, Caleb." I receive a goodnight kiss on my forehead before actually being dismissed to go to bed for the night. However, I have one last thing to do before my bedroom lights will go out.
✣✣✣
Underneath my bed is a box full of old memories, and what I mean by memories is pictures and handmade sketches of the one and only Rosie Freeman.
I was a little obsessed with Rosie back in elementary school. I remember just how many times I had begged my parents for a camera to later only use it to take pictures of Rosie like a miniature stalker. I even drew pictures of her whenever I felt just the right amount of artistic enough that day. Sure, the drawings sucked, but it's the thought that counts, right?
I never dared showing this to anyone– not even Noah. Instead, I collected each picture and drawing, and shoved them underneath my bed for safekeeping. Ever since then, I'd forgotten to refresh those embarrassing memories inside my head.
As I study each picture and each drawing, I can't help but feel attached to each individual one. It's like they're all small pieces of my heart that have been broken down and stored all in one place far away from the rest of my bodily organs. I miss the good old days when there wasn't much to worry and contemplate about. I'd do anything to get those days back.
Suddenly, an unfamiliar picture floats out and away from the rest like a leaf falling from a tree. I quickly snatch it and get a closer look at it.
In the photo is a much younger me and Brandon, along with a young, teenage boy with copper brown hair and a youthful smile.
I squint harder at the photograph. "Who is that…?"
A sharp pain shocks through my head and an instant headache follows. I groan quietly, trying not to wake anyone. I quickly clutch the sides of my head with both hands, trying to force the pain away with a harsh squeeze. Unfortunately, it doesn't work.
The pain only increases and I'm stuck kneeling on the floor, until my knees give in and I'm now curled in a ball, laying on my side. My hands are still clutching my head. It hurts so bad.
My surroundings begin to blur and fuzz up as I struggle to recall the boy in the picture. I hear two staticy voices enter my mindscape, both overlapping and trying to speak over the other.
“C̸̺͕̆̉͝ạ̵̡̮̔.̷̗͖̎̏̽.̵͖̠͛.̴̞̬̹̾̊l̵͔̠̗̓̆͐ë̸̛̯͙́̎b̵̧͙͗̕!!”
“C̸̺͕̆̉͝ạ̵̡̮̔.̷̗͖̎̏̽.̵͖̠͛.̴̞̬̹̾̊l̵͔̠̗̓̆͐ë̸̛̯͙́̎b̵̧͙͗̕!!”
“C̸̺͕̆̉͝ạ̵̡̮̔.̷̗͖̎̏̽.̵͖̠͛.̴̞̬̹̾̊l̵͔̠̗̓̆͐ë̸̛̯͙́̎b̵̧͙͗̕!!”
“C̸̺͕̆̉͝ạ̵̡̮̔.̷̗͖̎̏̽.̵͖̠͛.̴̞̬̹̾̊l̵͔̠̗̓̆͐ë̸̛̯͙́̎b̵̧͙͗̕!!”
The first voice is one that I semi recognize. It's the voice I keep hearing recently. This other voice, however, strikes a familiar chord with me– something I've known for a while.
So, with my head pounding and my stomach churning so hard that I think I might hurl, I gasp out, "Eliza…?"
So, what'd you all think of Chapter 5? If you liked this chapter, please consider voting and leaving a few comments. Reading your lovely comments are the highlight of my day and I get super excited when I see notifs for them 🥰🥰
I was honestly so scared I wasn't going to get this chapter out on time. I had some school work to catch up on, so I didn't get to write throughout the week, and then I had to work 2 closing shifts at work yesterday and tonight after an exhausting parade this morning with a heavy snare drum and harness attached to my body as I marched for almost an hour
I stayed up until 1 in the morning to get this chapter done on time and I still think it turned out alright. Girlboss moment (I think. Idk how that works exactly...) 😝
I'm a little upset that it's about 400 words short of my usual word Count, but that's ok. I'll do my best to write more next week
I'll see you then! ❤️