Rosasharon didn't sleep with you that night. To be fair, though, she didn't sleep at all. Instead, she sat up at her desk all night, scribbling down ideas for tomorrow's sermon.
You dozed on and off --you'd gotten so used to complete darkness at night that it was hard to get a good sleep without all the lights off-- and occasionally woke to find her turned around in her seat, staring at you, her expression shrouded in shadows.
She didn't act guilty, even after you caught her watching you sleep like some kind of creep. Just smiled slowly before turning back around, resuming her writing. It was always harder for you to fall asleep after that, though.
Needless to say, you weren't very well-rested when it was time for worship the next morning. You were half-asleep as you got ready, even ended up putting your dress and shoes on the wrong way before having to undress and redress.
"Ready?" She asked, somehow knowing when the morning sermon was about to begin without ever needing a watch or clock, as if she could tell time based on where the sun was in the sky.
You gave her a tired glare but said nothing, just walked past her out of the cabin. She followed close on your heels.
The girls gathered outside the chapel were visibly confused, probably wondering why the doors were closed and where Nurse Thorne was.
"Good morning, everyone!" Rosasharon addressed the crowd. She barely needed to raise her voice. When she spoke, they all listened. "Nurse Thorne had some urgent business she needed to take care of. She may not be here in person, but she's with us in spirit! Before she left, she put me in charge... So I'll be giving sermons until she returns."
There was a bit of excited murmuring amongst the girls.
She smiled indulgently before reaching up to pull off her veil, letting it flutter to the ground. "Why don't we have our sermon outside for a change?" She suggested. "As much as I love this little chapel, its atmosphere can be so... Suffocating at times. Let's go to the lake!"
The rest of the girls tentatively took their veils off as well, behaving as if they were doing something wrong. Then again, a few were a little too enthusiastic, ripping off the scrap of lace and stomping it into the dirt.
She led everyone to the edge of the lake, where she waded in deep, up to the waist. The crowd lingered around the edges of the water, mindful of the mud. It was hard enough as it was to keep white ballet flats white.
Then she started to preach.
"Today, I want to talk about baptism and how it showcases the grace of God! You see... One woman goes into the waters of baptism. And a different woman comes out, born again. But who is that woman who lies submerged? Perhaps that swimmer is both sinner and saint, until she is revealed unto the eyes of her fellows."
She proceeded to go on and on about the importance of baptism, how it illustrated --in dramatic style-- the death, burial, and resurrection of Christ as well as "our death to sin and new life in Christ." Whatever that meant.
You tuned out a great deal of it. It wasn't completely your fault, however. Sometimes you'd blink a little too long and open your eyes to find more time than you thought had passed. Maybe you were unconsciously dozing, taking little micro naps throughout.
You only suddenly jerked awake when she raised her voice to the crowd. "Tell me, sisters! Do you wish to be reborn in the sweet waters of baptism?"
"Yes!" The girls answered overzealously.
"Are you ready to be washed clean before the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit?"
"Yes!" They shouted again, louder this time, as if they wanted not just their preacher but God to hear them as well.
"Excellent!" Rosasharon laughed, clapping her hands together excitedly. "Let us begin. Y/N, would you come into the water, please?"
Just like that, all eyes were on you. You awkwardly shifted your weight between your two feet, resisted the urge to avert your gaze or wring your hands.
"Why me?" You asked, to her and to God.
"You'll be the first of the Faithful to be cleansed," she explained. "After that will be the Hopeful, the Charitable, so on and so forth, ending with the Temperate."
You let out a nervous little laugh. It came out almost as more of a bark. "I'll sit this one out, if it's alright with you."
She shook her head. "I'm afraid not. God has spoken to me and He said... 'Take them, Rosasharon. Take them even if they resist. For those who turn away from Jesus Christ are the ones most in need of His salvation. Though their sins are great, their souls are not beyond saving. All they must do is be cleansed.'"
There was a tension in the air that you didn't like. You had a creeping feeling that, should you continue to resist, you'd be dragged into the water against your will.
"Fine," you hissed through gritted teeth, toeing off your shoes before stepping into the mud and the muck. Your clothes were easy to wash. Your ballet flats? Not so much.
Rosasharon just smiled, holding her arms out and open for you, pulling you in as soon as you came within reach. "You can have no doubts," she whispered. "The cleansing will drown them from your soul." Then, louder, for the sake of your audience this time, "I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit!"
Then, cradling you in her arms like a baby, she carefully dunked you under the murky waters. You had time to close your eyes and mouth, hold your breath... It wasn't awful, but it wasn't too great either.
You stumbled back to shore, just barely finding your footing in the shifting silt.
Most of the baptisms went off without a hitch. No one hesitated that way you did... Until it came to the Temperate.
It was obvious none of them wanted any part of this little ritual. Elizabeth went first. She emerged from the water like some sort of Leviathan. Next was Chaeyoung. She looked more like a half-drowned rat after her dip. Last but not least... Louise.
She watched everyone else take a dip with growing dread. And --when it was finally her turn-- she lingered on the shore longer than you, Elizabeth, and Chaeyoung combined. After more than a minute went by and she didn't take a single step towards the water, everyone turned to look at her.
"I can't," she said, weak as a newborn kitten. You didn't blame her. She was terrified of the lake, claimed to see the corpses of dead campers from the 80's afloat on its surface.
"You can," Rosasharon answered, arms outstretched. "You're not alone. Me, God, and all your sisters are here with you."
She glanced around nervously at her so-called "sisters," who were unsympathetic at the best of times. Sometimes staggeringly so. "I... I can't. I just can't."
Rosasharon's smile slipped a little before quickly finding its feet again. "I suppose it can't be helped." And, just when you thought she had given up, respected someone else's wishes for a change, she said, "Just, could you bring her to me?"
The Just didn't even hesitate. Grinning like a pack of hyenas, two of them grabbed Louise by her arms and started bodily dragging her towards their little makeshift cult leader.
"No!" Louise cried. She dug her heels in, but it was impossible to find traction in the mud. She just slowly slid towards the water's edge.
Elizabeth lunged after them like a hunting dog. "Leave her alone! Leave her alone!"
The Just's camp counsel stood between her and her charges, so Elizabeth socked her in the jaw. She fell to the ground like a sack of potatoes. But another couple counselors intervened, producing syringes --Haldol, you guessed-- seeming out of thin air, and stuck the crazed girl with them. Then it was Elizabeth's turn to collapse.
You and Chaeyoung rushed forward next, only to back off again when more syringes were pulled out. All the two of you could do was watch helplessly as your friend was led away.
"Rosasharon, stop it!" You yelled over Louise's screaming.
She didn't listen, didn't even look at you, just kept her gaze locked on the girl squirming like a worm on a hook. "I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit!"
With how much Louise was struggling, it took all three of them to dunk her under the water's surface. It felt like they held her under longer than any other girl, probably out of spite or sadistic glee. Once most of the bubbling had died down, they raised her up again.
She emerged sputtering and sobbing, begging to be let go. This must have been an incredibly traumatic experience for Louise, but at least it was over.
Only it wasn't.
"I don't know, sisters..." Rosasharon hummed, addressing the crowd instead of the girl. "But this one doesn't look clean to me." Then she submerged her in the murky waters again. And again. And again and again and again.
She brought her up for air more than once but just barely let her catch her breath before holding her down under again.
"No! Stop! Stop it!" You shouted, surging forward only to be held back by the rest of the Just, the ones still on land. Your mind was racing, trying to figure out the right thing to do or say to make this stop. Finally, you blurted out, "I'm sorry!"
Rosasharon paused her waterboarding, locked eyes with you across the lake.
You must have done something right... So you soldiered on. "I'm sorry," you repeated. "I shouldn't have spoken to her. I won't do it again. I know better now. You can-- You can stop."
She was quiet for a long time, didn't do more than tilt her head slightly to the side. But eventually she spoke up. "I think that's all for today. Service has ended."
Just like that, the spell was broken. They released Louise, who stumbled back to shore worse than you had, falling several times on her way there. Chaeyoung was there to catch her in her arms once she finally found her way back to dry land.
You resisted the urge to do the same. It would be worse for her in the long run.
Instead, you waited for Rosasharon to wade out of the water. The crowd had dispersed, headed off to the Ark undoubtedly, leaving just five girls --the Temperate and you two Faithful-- at the water's edge.
Rosasharon came really close to you, hovered close enough to kiss. "No more other girls," she whispered, breath fanning over your face, smelling faintly of vanilla-mint. "Just me."
Elizabeth was right. It was her. It was always her.
At a loss for words, you nodded numbly.
She smiled like God, but an Old Testament one.