Following our affectionate interaction and hug, the day transitioned into night once more. We shared dinner with Mang Damian and Manang Cecil, as we were planning to spend the night and return in our normal life tomorrow.
Nasa kwarto kami nakahiga. Nakahiga siya sa tabi ko habang hinahaplos ko ang malalambot niyang buhok at nakabalot sakin ang mga kamay niya.
"I wish this night wouldn't end. I want us to remain like this forever, if only we could," she expressed, her eyes shut and her embrace tightening.
"We have that potential. Let's wait that," I responded, my fingers gently tracing her hair.
She raised her face slowly, locking her gaze with mine.
"Let's hold onto this memory," she murmured, her voice gentle.
"How could I ever forget a moment spent with a goddes like you?" I answered, a smile forming on me.
A smile appeared on her lips before she leaned in and kissed me. I reciprocated the kiss, which lasted only a brief moment before she looked at me once more.
"You'll be ending your second year next week. Attend the ceremony at SU and meet me there," she suggested.
I grinned, "Babalik na sila mom and dad, so the ceremony it is," sagot ko.
Ngumiti siya sakin bago niya ulit isinubsob ang mukha niya sa dibdib ko.
"Will we ever see each other again after this?" tanong ko sa kanya.
"I wouldn't last a day without seeing you. Of course we will," she answered.
"I will, Jael."
In that instant, her breathing grew deep, and I realized nakatulog na pala siya.
I longed for us to remain in this state forever, but the challenges in both our lives were still unresolved. I was unfamiliar with her past, but I am determined to uncover it.
I am willing to let her presence once again fill my life with warmth. Her undisclosed secrets seemed like shadows encroaching upon my once pure and luminous existence, yet I was prepared to embrace them.
If her hidden struggles were destined to bring me hope, I'm more than willing to let them envelop me entirely.
-
It's early in the morning and I woke up without her by my side.
Ganito pala ang feeling kapag hindi nagigising ng asawa, kaya pala galit na galit siya nung hindi ko siya ginising.
Ngayon alam ko na.
Bumalikwas ako sa kama at nagdabog pero natigil ako nang bumukas ang pinto. Akala ko siya na pero si Manang Cecil lang pala.
"Miss Frey pinapagising na po kayo ni Miss Rhea, kakain na raw po." Malambing na sabi ng matanda.
Talagang nag-utos pa, hindi nalang siya ang nagpunta dito para bigyan ako ng morning kiss.
"Susunod ako manang." Sagot ko dito. Tumango naman ito at umalis tapos tumayo ako at nag-ayos ng sarili.
Bumaba ako after kong mag toothbrush. Nakita ko siyang may kausap sa cellphone habang may tinitimpla. She's still wearing her night outfit. She's busy stirring what's inside the cup at pumasok naman ako sa kitchen nang hindi inaalis ang titig sa kanya.
"Yes dad, I'm at the old house. I will go back today and I'm with my -"
Natigilan siya nang nakita niya akong nakaupo na nakatingin sa kanya.
She moved forward to approach the chair where I was. She is simultaneously holding the phone and the cup.
"My what?" I mentally said.
She placed the cup on the table in front of me.
"I'm with my girlfriend and I'll be back on the afternoon," she stated with a deliberate grin, leaning down to give me a kiss on the forehead.
"You're awake, I've already made a milk for you." She pointing to the milk she had made for me.
Para sakin pala yon.
Hindi ako makagalaw sa sinabi niya, especially considering that it's her father, I suppose, I can't believe what she just said. I giggled out, I couldn't control my emotions right now.
Kinikilig ako pero ngumiti lang ako sa kanya. Grabe ka na ma'am, bumawi agad.
Wala na hindi na ako galit. Nasan na ba ang mga hugasin dito?
With that, binaba na niya ang tawag pagkakuway inusog ang mesa ng konti para makaupo sa lap ko.
"Good morning," nakangiting sabi niya sakin habang nakalambitin na sa leeg ko. Hinawakan ko siya to support her back.
"My god, stop this." I murmured.
She raised her eyebrows at me, "Don't you like what I have told with my father?"
"It's not that. It's just...."
"What?"
"You're acting nice today," natatawang sagot ko dito.
"So!?" her firm voice punched my face.
"I like it." Pag-iiba ko ng sagot sa kanya. Ayaw ko ng gulo, nasa mood siya ngayon at dapat sasabayan ko siya. Mahirap na, sa susunod nito magiging ice palamig na naman ang pagkatao niya.
"You don't like what I said that you are my girlfriend?" tanong niya.
"That's what I enjoy." I said, I leaned in to meet her warm lips.
"Hmmm," she hummed when my lips touched hers. I kissed her while she was sitting on my lap and wrapping her arms around my neck.
"Rhea, miss?" tawag ni Mang Damian sa may pintuan. Napatigil ako sa ginagawa ko at iniwasan ng tingin ang matanda.
Naramdaman kong nakatitig ito samin. With our position, nakaramdam ako ng hiya. Nakita kami ng matanda na naglalampungan sa kusina.
"Yes?" sagot ng babaeng wala yatang balak na umalis sa lap ko kahit nakita na kami ng matanda.
"Ready na po ang mainit na tubig, pwede na po kayong maligo." Sabi nito.
"Thank you, Mang Damian," she replied.
Mang Damian departed without inquiring about our activity.
He knows his madam is gay.
"Ma'am," I said, gently urging her to stand up from my lap.
"What? Am I too heavy?" She retorted, her tone authoritative.
I rolled my eyes. "Iinomin ko lang ang gatas," I replied.
She began to shift her body, and I thought she would get up, but instead, she reached for the milk on the table and offered it to me by hand.
"Drink," she ordered.
My cheeks flushed with warmth, and I couldn't decline her gesture, so I opened my mouth and sipped the milk from the cup.
"Would you like to shower together?" she inquired. I suddenly choked, spilling milk as I was taken aback by her unexpected question.
Napatawa siya nang tingnan ko siya. She let out a chuckle as she observed me accidentally spilling the milk. In a bold move, she leaned in once more to lick the spilled milk off my face, leaving me completely immobilized.
Her daring nature had me utterly captivated. She had a way of making me feel utterly paralyzed by her audacity.
"Sweet," she murmured after her impromptu action. My face turned even redder, and I averted my eyes, unable to meet her gaze.
Dahan-dahan siyang tumayo habang tumatawa nang mahinhin. Nilagay niya ang baso sa mesa tsaka tumingin ulit sakin with a playful smirk.
"I really thought yo -
"S-stop," nahihiyang tugon ko dito.
Her laughter filled the room once more, and it was a delightful sound to experience for the first time. It was her laughter that compelled me to gaze at her, as if time had slowed down, and her presence seemed to radiate before me. Her voice reverberated in my heart and mind.
"I'll take a shower first, have the toasted bread, and drink the milk," she said after her laughter subsided. She planted a kiss on my cheek and swiftly left the kitchen to prepare for her bath, leaving me in a state of wonder once again.
Kinain ko ang ginawa niyang toasted bread na medyo sunog pero okay na, as long as hindi masisira ang tiyan ko nito. After an half hour of waiting natapos naman siyang maligo at sumunod akong maligo. Natapos lahat ng pag-aasikaso at aalis na kami.
"We're leaving, Mang Damian. Promise me you'll look after Layla," she requested as she got into the car. Nakaupo na ako katabi ng driver's seat.
"Opo, miss," Mang Damian replied, wearing a reassuring smile.
I exchanged smiles with Mang Damian and Manang Cecil. Nakatayo silang dalawa sa labas ng sasakyan.
"Take care, Manang Cecil and Mang Damian. Salamat po," I told them, offering a warm smile.
"Wala iyon ineng, balik kayo dito ni Miss Rhea ah?" natutuwang sambit ng matanda.
Tumango ako at ngumiti sa kanila. Pinaandar na niya ang makina at aalis na ang sasakyan. The two elderly individuals waved their farewells as we drove the car away from the house.
"Kailan kaya ako makakabalik dito?" I mumbled to myself. She gently moved her right hand while steering the wheel and held my hand.
"We'll come back here," she assured me, her smile directed at me.
Malayo ang byahe namin pauwi at ihahatid na niya ako sa bahay namin. Gusto kong samahan nalang siya sa bahay niya pero hindi rin pwede kasi babalik na sila mom at dad. Hindi ko rin alam kung nakauwi na ba sila or hindi pa basta ang alam ko ngayon sila uuwi. Sinabihan ko na din siya na baka nakauwi na nga ang parents ko and she insisted na siya na ang maghahatid sakin diretso sa bahay.
Nakarating kami sa labas ng gate ng bahay. Luminga-linga ako sa loob ng gate at confirmed, nakauwi na nga sila pero bakit hindi nila ako tinawagan? Nasa loob din ang sasakyan ni Ma'am Vivien.
Iniisip ko pa lang ang pangalan ni Ma'am Vivien and a thought na makikita ko siya ay kinakabahan na ako. Pero gayunpaman, kailangan ko tatagan ang loob ko to know more kung ano man ang pinaplano ng pamilya ko at plano niya, plano nila.
It seems like lahat sila ay may tinatago sakin including this woman beside me.
Lalabas na sana ako ng sasakyan nang nagsalita siya.
"Hey." Her cold voice again.
Napatigil ako at tumingin sa kanya.
"You forgot something." Sabi niya sakin, her eyes locked on me.
Tumingin ako sa backseat pero parang wala naman akong nalimutan.
"Wala naman?" tanong ko dito.
Inikot niya ang mata sakin pagkatapos ay inalis niya ang seatbelt at inilapit ang mukha. Hinawakan niya ang mukha ko and with that her lips meets mine. She pressed it slowly and gently. I smiled in between our kiss and I gradually reciprocate a second.
"You tend to forget that," she remarked after our kiss. I smiled at her and gazed into her eyes, which seemed to convey how much she missed me, even though we weren't yet apart. Her eyes yearned for me to stay by her side, but we can't.
"I won't forget it next time," I assured her.
"Give me your number," she requested. I reached into my pocket, kinuha ko ang phone ko at binigay sa kanya so she can also checks my number.
"I'll save my number in case you will miss me." She said.
Sus, kahit siya nga ang nakakamiss sakin agad. Para-paraan din.
Afterward, I stepped out of her car, and she drove away. As I entered our gate, my heart raced with nervousness. I gently turned the main doorknob, taking a cautious step toward my room. However, my gaze shifted to the living room, where I found my parents and Ma'am Vivien. It appeared as though they had been in discussion and were waiting for me as well.
Sabay silang napatingin sakin at nagulat akong mabilis na tumayo si dad mula sa kinauupuan niya. Kinakabahan sa ano mang gawin ng ama ko pero tatanggapin ko, wala silang alam na nasaan ako after ko umalis sa bahay ni Ma'am Vivien. Kasalanan ko din and I will gladly accept their punishment for me.
Malapit na si dad sa kinatatayuan ko and I slowly shut my eye waiting for his hand to land on my face. I thought sasampalin niya ako but I was surprise when he envelope his arms on me. Niyakap niya ako.
"Where have you been?" he asked, his voice painted with worry.
Dahan-dahan kong binuksan ang kamay ko at nakita kong papalapit na rin si mom to hug me.
"Freyja, we're so worried. Saan ka galing anak?" mom asked, halata sa mga boses nito ang naiiyak na.
"I-I'm sorry..." I spoke. Sabay nila akong niyakap nang mahigpit.
Their warmth surrounded me, but it didn't compare to the comforting embrace of her. This warmth seemed to carry an undercurrent, as if they had been concealing something from me since my childhood. My parents, mom and dad, no longer felt like the same familiar figures.
My frustration grew, compounded by the presence of Ma'am Vivien, who stood there, watching me. Her eyes seemed to be trying to convey something that needed to be revealed, yet at the same time, her gaze felt like a betrayal.
I couldn't bring myself to trust her or get closer to her anymore. It was as if my parents were using her, and she allowed my parents to use her.
Umalis ako sa pagkakayakap mula sa kanila at mabilis na umakyat papunta sa kwarto. My tears went down on my cheek again. Gusto kong umalis dito, gusto kong bumalik sa bahay niya. In her, I found peace and solace. This house feels like hell for me.
"Frey..." Ma'am Vivien voice spoke behind me. Sinundan niya pala ako.
"Get out." I firmly said, my voice wavered.
"Makinig ka sakin, Frey." Her voice laid with sincerity but it feels like she's just using her voice to get me.
"Ma'am, I trusted you." I started to cry. Lumingon ako tsaka hinarap siya. My vision began to blurred because of the tears that is running down my cheek.
"I know and I want you to trust me more. Trust me once again.." she mumbled.
"Hindi ko na alam, ma'am. Parang lahat kayo ay may tinatago sakin, napapagod na ako. Napapagod na ako sa inyo." I confessed.
"Don't get tired trusting me." She answered, her voice is soft yet with a hint of desperation.
"Wala ng rason para pagkatiwalaan kita, wala ng rason para pagkatiwalaan ko kayo." I firmly said. Hindi pa rin tumitigil sa pagdaloy ang mga luha ko.
"Frey... There's always a reason. Please trust me once more. I'll do whatever it takes to help you," she implored, attempting to reach for my hand, but I swiftly withdrew it, avoiding her touch.
"You're not helping me," I retorted, my voice barely audible. "Ma'am, ano pa ba ang tinatago niyo?" I asked, my words filled with a cold tension.
"Frey," she murmured, her gaze fixed on me. Wala siyang balak na sabihin sakin.
"Get out," I said sharply.
"Fre-
"Out." I reiterated. I could hardly feel my eyes anymore. With nothing more to do, she slowly retreated, opened the door, and left me.
Tears streamed down my face once again as I found myself in my room, which had once been a source of warmth and comfort. Now, it felt cold and desolate, like an ocean that had suddenly lost its daylight and warm breeze, replaced by a chilling wave of problems and the sting of betrayal.
Parang hindi na ito ang bahay na nakasanayan ko.
This is not a home anymore.
My home is her. She's my home and I want to back to her arms already.
I miss her, already.
Kinuha ko ang phone ko out of my pocket to message her.
Wifey
+639*********
My tears retreated when I saw her nickname that she puts on with her number. Tinawagan ko siya but she's not picking up, maybe she's busy. I tried to call her again but she cannot be reach. Pinagsawalang bahala ko nalang at nilagay ang phone sa table ko. Kakahatid lang niya sakin at I've heard na pupunta siya sa daddy niya, she's literally busy.
With a clouded mind, I remained confined to my room throughout the day. I had no appetite, but my mom left a meal outside my room's door, understanding my desire for solitude. It was a relief, even though I couldn't trust them anymore. I longed for them to finally disclose the hidden truth, but they continued to keep it hidden.
As the day turned into night, my eagerness to meet her grew, and thoughts of her made my heart race. However, a sense of unease began to creep in. There was a tinge of nervousness as I recalled that she hadn't been answering my calls. I had made numerous attempts to reach her, but all had failed.
Tinawagan ko ulit siya at nawala ang kaba ko nang sagutin niya ang tawag ko.
"Missing me already?" bigla ulit nanumbalik ang lakas ko ng marinig ang boses niya.
"I miss you." I weakly said, "Pick me up."
"I can't right now, Jael. I still have a meeting with a family of someone. After this, I will pick you up and let's spend the night together, okay?" She stated, leaving me puzzled.
Family of someone? Para saan?
Bakit may meeting siya? Does that mean na her father and her will meet someone...?
"Wait for me. The meeting will start in a few minutes, I'll end the call and I will call you again after this."
I heard a back ground soft latin music bago niya pa binaba ang call. She didn't even waited for me to utter a word.
The moment I overheard those words, a wave of nervousness engulfed me once more. My heart raced, and I couldn't help but wonder - could it be that she was meeting that guy's family? What was the purpose of their meeting? And why was there soft Latin music playing in the background if it was just a formal gathering?
Baffled by the situation, I felt compelled to check her mansion. Mabilis akong lumabas ng mansion after ko mag-suot ng pants at black hoodie lang.
Without seeking my parents permission, I hastily got into my car and set off for her mansion. However, upon arriving outside the gate, I noticed that the lights were off, indicating she wasn't there. Anxiety gnawed at me, and I felt a sense of hopelessness at the thought of not finding her. But then, a car emerged from her gate, sparking a desperate glimmer of hope, and I decided to follow it. It's not her car pero sinundan ko pa rin ito.
Malayo na ang narating ng sinusundan ko at nagulat nalang ako nang tumigil ito sa malaking bahay. Magarbong bahay. Maraming body guard sa labas na nakabantay. It feels like there's a gathering/event inside. Nang lumapit pa ako nang konti ay narinig kong parehas ng background music na narinig ko sa kabilang linya kanina.
Could it be that she's here?
Nag-antay ako ng ilang minuto at may mga ibang sasakyan rin ang nagsidatingan and their outfit is so formal. Parang ang grand ng event.
Ang pinoproblema ko lang ay kung paano ako makapasok sa loob. I want to know what's happening inside. I really want. An impulse to be stealthy overcame me, and I managed to devise a way inside. Five bodyguards were stationed outside, diligently watching the main gate. I stepped out of my car and pulled my hoodie over my head, taking advantage of the moment when one of the guards inspected an incoming vehicle and greeted passersby. I moved stealthily, avoiding their notice, and successfully entered.
As I scanned the surroundings, my eyes took in an array of decorations meant for a lavish event. Nervousness still coursed through my body, prompting me to find cover in the garden's trees, which offered some concealment. The mansion itself was imposing, complete with a grand staircase, a table adorned with expensive items and flowers, and red-colored chairs for guests.
The soft Latin music persisted in the background, and deep down, I knew - my heart was telling me - she was here.
Mula sa malayo, a familiar image of a man I know emerged.
"L-Lohan?" I abruptly said. Hindi ako nagkakamali si Lohan ang nakikita ko. He's dressed in a formal all-white suit. Gusto ko siyang puntahan at tanungin pero naiiba ang suot ko sa lahat. Pero bahala na, I want to talk to him.
Gradually, I began to emerge from the concealment of the garden's trees, my confidence growing as I observed that the people were preoccupied and unlikely to notice me. However, my movement came to a halt when a man's voice resonated through a microphone.
"Good evening, everyone. With great anticipation for this announcement, allow me to introduce Mr. Gustavo Saijo Montejo," the speaker declared. The crowd's attention shifted towards the grand staircase, revealing the image of a towering, bearded man with an unsettling smile.
Montejo? So, this was Gab's father. Anong klaseng event ba to?
Applause resounded throughout the gathering, an expensive show of appreciation.
"And now, let us welcome and acknowledge Mr. Ronaldo Walter Isfaela," the voice continued. My eyes widened in astonishment as an elderly man with an aura reminiscent of a mafia figure appeared, descending the stairs. Nervousness once again washed over me, and my heart raced.
Isfaela? Her surname. Could this be her father?
My gaze remained fixed on the staircase, awaiting the next name to be called.
"And finally, their son and daughter, who will soon unite their hearts in marriage," the emcee announced, sending a pang of dread through my heart. "The future Mrs. Isfaela-Montejo." My heart sank as I watched her, elegantly walking down the stairs, her arm linked with Mr. Gab's, in a display of opulence and affluence.
Hindi ako makapaniwala sa narinig ko. Marriage? Magpapakasal sila?
What kind of bullshit is this?
Trust her?
Natandaan ko ang sinabi niyang dapat hindi ako maniwala sa marinig at makikita ko pero ano to?
I had never felt such an excruciating anguish in my heart as I watched her gracefully descend the magnificent staircase. While the lavish event went on all around me, it seemed as though my inner world had slowed to a painful crawl.
I suddenly had a surge of memories from our time together, like if they were trying to trick me. In my thoughts, the vows we had made, the loving kisses we had exchanged, and the cozy embraces that had once filled our moments together, played out nonstop. Each recollection served as a harsh reminder of who we once were.
However, there she was, gracefully gliding in the spotless white dress that enhanced her attractiveness and I experienced the sensation of a knife piercing my heart. She moved forward, furthering the agonizing realization that she was no longer mine to hold. My heart had been given to a woman who was now engaged to someone else. Someone that I've been jealous of.
The pain of betrayal wounded even deeper than realizing she would never be mine. It tore at my very core. The assurances we had shared and the commitments we had made in private now all seem hollow. It was a breach of our confidence in addition to our affection.
Tears began to rise up in my eyes and block my vision, I kept my stare fixed on her. My heart ached under the crushing weight of the awful realization that the woman I had loved was fading away.
Ito ʼyong sinasabi niyang meeting?
Meeting na pagpapakasal?
She had told me it was merely a family meeting, but I had no inkling that it concealed the announcement of their impending wedding. She had lied, deceived me in the worst way possible.
How could she have assured me earlier that after this event, she would meet me and spend the night, when, in reality, she was now engaged?
Tears flowed uncontrollably down my cheeks as I watched her. She seemed to be scanning the people around her, yet there was no smile or any emotion on her face - just like the emptiness in my heart.
Our eyes met, and her expression shifted from indifference to one of concern. At that moment, my heart plummeted, and I felt the crushing weight of betrayal.
It was as if a colossal wave had struck my body and soul, and the pain in my heart consumed me entirely.