Alex:
'You've come, you've come,' Alex suddenly spoke with a grin. For a second he looked down on the book, and walked closer towards Nigel afterwards.
'Don José and the Donna Inez led,
For some time an unhappy sort of life,
Wishing each other, not divorced, but dead.'
Alex shook his head and closed the book for now, looking over Nigel's shoulder as he searched through the books as well now.
'Pretty impressive, huh?'
Nigel:
By the time Alex showed up Nigel already had quite a large pile of books on his side and he was going through the pages of another one. He didn't look up at Alex when he appeared, like he was too absorbed in the pages. But he seemed to have heard him.
"Baron Byron.." he mumbled, going through a couple of other pages before he decided that the book he was holding would not be useful and put it back in the closet.
"Byron was a fine writer yes. But what does it have to do with our old grandmasters, Jack?"
Alex:
Alex his mouth corners curled up as soon as Nigel spoke out the name Baron Byron. How did he know? How did he even know that? Alex began to chuckle disbelieved and took place in front of Nigel now - not caring about the less space he had to get himself in.
'Seriously? Do you even know things about Byron? What is wrong with you Nigel? Never expected you to know that.'
He licked his lips and took a deep breath, folding his hands around the book as he shrugged his shoulders.
'Nothing,' he simply answered. 'I just like the book. Have you ever heard of Byron his secret lover? Harness?'
A mysterious grin crossed Alex his face as he stared at Nigel - not wanting to miss a thing of his face expressions.
'No one knew Byron had a secret relationship with Harness, a white haired boy...'
Nigel:
His fingertips stroked over the book rugs as he searched for titles that could be placed in the right category.
"I read Jack, it's not uncommon. Besides, we discussed Byron at school once. Not St. Barnabus,- I mean the school I went before we met."
He looked back at Alex, who finally seemed to have his full attention.
"Not exactly, no.. My previous school was religious as well. They didn't discuss things they didn't want us to know or things that could give use wrong thoughts.. But if no one knew, how is it you do know?"
Alex:
Alex nibbled on the inside of his lower lip as he gazed over Nigel his shoulder in the distance. His hand still rubbed the book cover. For a moment he pulled a thoughtful face - like he has found something in his head what wasn't the think he needed.
'Oh,' he nodded curious now. 'Well, that make sense.'
He pursed his lips for a moment and began to grin mysteriously afterwards - since Nigel didn't seemed to know about Byron his secret lover.
'Exactly, that's why no one knew on the school. Byron went to an prestigious British boarding school for boys where they weren't allowed to have- you know, boy's weren't allowed to be each others lover. In the time they lived, you could get the death penalty. They went to Harrow-on-the-hill. Somehow Harness had this sexual attraction for Baron, and he had the same back - though it went with struggles at the first moment they met. Because they weren't able to do "things" in the school, they always locked themselves up in the unused bathroom which was located somewhere under the floor. The basement. It was like this room with a well, whatever. The point is, they loved each other to death...'
Alex took a deep breath - satisfied with his own whole story. His knowledge about this all, and sighed afterwards.
'Harness played in a play, impersonating a lady - since the school was only for boys, and they had women parts in the play after all. Harness played the woman, the wife from Byron who played in it as well.'
He slowly came towards Nigel and exhaled against his jaw now.
'They wrote each other letters, love letters which they found after a long time. That's how I know. Harness died of tuberculosis - and some say... that his spirit is still wandering in the Harrow boarding school on the hill, since he wants Byron to be with him forever. He want him to join death, so they can be each others lovers-' Alex softly pressed his lips upon Nigel's jaw now and almost entirely closed his eyes 'for eternity...'
Nigel:
He kept looking at Alex,- momentarily forgetting about the books he was busy with. It was this charm in Alex when he spoke that managed to captivate Nigel every time. It's what he liked about Alex. He was one of the few, - or perhaps the only person, - that managed to intrigue him.
"wishing each other not divorced but dead," he mumbled under his breath, more to himself than to you.
He looked down and as Alex moved closer, blowing his breath over Nigel's skin, his eyes closed entirely with Nigel barely realizing it.
"To whom do you relate?" he whispered suddenly, right after Alex kissed his jaw. "Byron? Or Harness?"
Alex:
Alex closed his eyes as well for a moment now, letting everything sink into his mind as he saw the whole story passing by for a moment in front of his eyes. Somehow it reminded it about him, and Nigel - though they weren't truly lovers - for as far as Alex knew.
'Wishing each other, not divorced, but death,' he repeated in a soft breath. He had the book pressed against his own belly now as he pressed another kiss upon Nigel his jaw - not too hard, since he didn't really knew if it was the painful one or not.
'I feel related to Byron, to be honest,' he softly replied as he opened his eyes now. He rubbed his lips softly over Nigel his neck now as soon as he noticed there was no one around.
'You're pretty the same as Harness,' he mumbled now - barely noticeable. 'They say he was small, skinny, pale, blue eyed - but then white hair.' A sigh escaped his mouth now, disappointed. 'He died too...'
'Remember thee. Aye, doubt it not.
Thy husband too shall think of thee:
By neither shalt thou be forgot,
Thou false to him, thou fiend to me...'
It reminded him somehow about the moment he realized Nigel had killed Susan.
'I know this book too good...'
Nigel:
He nodded his head and opened his eyes again, though not to look at Alex. He stared ahead of him as if he could see the story passing before his eyes as well.
"I thought so.." he mumbled at Alex' answer, automatically tilting his head a little to the left as Alex moved his lips over his neck, of which the skin was so very sensitive. He wanted to comment how inappropriate this was to do in England's best public library but he couldn't bring himself to say it somehow.
Nigel's lips curled up again when Alex told him he knew the book too well and he felt like he escaped from some sort of trance. One that Alex brought him into.
"I reckon you do," he said in a chuckling tone that came out as an exhale.. More a breath than laughter. He moved his head back then so his head rested against that of Alex. A small and rare gesture of honest affection.
"I don't suppose it has a happy ending.." he said, more serious now.
Alex:
Alex his hands were still folded around the book which he pressed closely against his belly - as if he were afraid to drop it down the floor what would made the others able to catch them. The only way Alex touched Nigel, was by the touch of his lips in his neck, and his chest that softly touched Nigel's hands which were folded around the Templar books.
'There's much more about Byron. He had quite the same character as I have. Stubborn, cheeky-' A soft sigh escaped his lips what had to look like a soft laugh. 'And Harness was more withdrawn, and more of a loner. Like you - don't get me wrong with that.'
For a second he pressed his lips down on the space where Nigel his carotid artery was. As soon as Nigel let his head resting upon Alex's, he closed his eyes and pursed his lips - exhaling through his nose against Nigel's skin.
'No,' he softly mumbled as he shook his head - stroking his lips over Nigel his skin again. 'But they are together now...'
Alex slowly pulled back his head and swallowed, searching for his eyes. 'Byron died in time, I thought he was murdered - but I can't remember me that. It means they are together, for always. I bet in heaven - or any place...'
Nigel:
Nigel shook his head,- for as far that was possible when pressed against that of Alex,- assuring he was not offended.
"There's nothing to get wrong. It's the truth. That does sound like us."
His eyes closed again for a moment when Alex moved his lips over that one spot so sensitive to him and his lips part as if he's going to make a sound but for they are in a public library he doesn't. His eyes open again when Alex says they are together now and he purses his lips together dissatisfied with that thought.
"No."
Nigel's voice is barely audible, despite the still quietness of the room. It's little more than breath, but the word still has a sharp intensity to it as he hisses it out, the one word of dissagreeance.
"They're dead. ... They're gone."
Alex:
'Exactly,' Alex mumbled now as he nuzzled his face in Nigel his neck. He pressed his lips and pulled a thoughtful face as he thought about the whole story once again. Byron had even the same with women, and practicably had the same with the violence - or at least that was what Alex could remember himself. He knew the riddles and everything exactly good, but somehow some things were forgotten too in time.
As Nigel said no - or at least it seemed so - Alex frowned and crooked his head a bit, though he was still able to exhale against Nigel his skin. His head was resting against his after all.
'They are,' he whispered now as he smiled lightly - not even lightly bothered by Nigel his dissagreeance response. 'They are together Nigel, trust me. I mean, you're dead- you still are, sort of. You came back. But before you didn't, you'd always been there, and you know that. You were stuck on this world, perfectly left alone - probably. But I guess they moved away. That's at least how I see it. Everything is possible.'
Suddenly someone passed by what made Alex immediately pulling his head back and keeping the book in front of his face like he was studying it - he didn't really cared about Nigel now. He just acted like he was concentrating himself upon the book. As soon as the old lady finally left again - with an expression like she wanted to kill them - Alex looked up from the edge of the book and started to chuckle softly.
'Now, that was a witch, my friend.'
Nigel:
He shook his head again, not convinced.
"No.. It's different. I wasn't really dead, because I never moved on. And the biggest difference is that I came back. You're right to say they probably moved on together.. But none of that matters. How could dead people matter?"
It was a little more clear now, why Nigel wanted to believe in eternity do desperately. One of the reasons was because he feared death, permanent death at least. In that matter he was just like his uncle.. He didn't believe there was anything to be found after death but insignificance.
When Alex moved away that quickly it caught his attention, and he soon found out it was because an old librarian passing. She threw tem a dirty look and then waggled on. Nigel just smirked at Alex' comment, thinking back of his friend James somehow – the “witch” who brought him back from death.
"Hardly, Jack.. That's not a witch, it's a hag."
Alex:
A deep sigh escaped his mouth, though he had to smile afterwards.
'You can be só romantic, Nigel. It's almost unbelievable. I think they are together now. At least in some way. Who knows what life has to offer after death? Just like you said, you didn't moved on. And the thing is, that Harness is probably the one who killed Byron - as a ghost. People say it's a myth, but since you were with me as a ghost as well, I think I'm starting to believe it. Harness wanted Byron so desperately with him, that he kept coming in his dreams, and did these dirty things-' Alex frowned now, as if he saw something in front of his eyes which he didn't wanted to see. 'I thought Byron died of tuberculosis as well, and that was because Harness kept doing things with him - even though he was a ghost. Tuberculosis is highly contagious.'
Alex licked his lips and shook his head now. It didn't really made much sense, though. The point was, he found it quite a wonderful story and he saw some things in it Nigel and he had in common.
As Nigel told him the old lady was a hag instead of a witch, Alex frowned his brows and started to chuckle again.
'Like there's a difference...'
Nigel:
He frowned lightly and looked at Alex slightly confused when he mention he was só romantic.
"How so?"
Of course Alex meant it the sarcastic way but Nigel failed to notice that. Right now he just didn't understand Alex' definition of romantic. Nigel was in fact véry romantic. Not in the sense of love,- which people so often mistake the word for,- but in the sense of imagination and seeing fictional stories in about everything in life.
Nigel frowned even more at the next comment, the dream part.
"Dirty things?" He lifted his eyebrow, not sure whether to laugh with that or not. "How does he know he wasn't just dreaming from his own perverted mind?"
He chuckled softly and then returned his attention to the books, continuing his search.
"The difference is that a witch is nothing to be ashamed of.. A hag, however, is an insult."
Alex:
Alex leaned against the bookcase again as soon as he saw Nigel's expression change. Though he was so incredibly intelligent, he could be so incredibly dumb as well. But he got used to that. Nigel had always been an outstander if they talked about being romantic, and loving someone.
'Don't you get it? It's such a beautiful love story, and you just shut it off with: oh, they're gone now. That's not romantic, is it?'
When Nigel suddenly came back to the dirty part again, Alex raised his eyebrows challenging as he listened to his words. Perverted mind? How could Alex know?
'Why do you ask me that? I'm not the real Byron, you should've asked him when you had the change for it.'
Alex punched Nigel playfully against his shoulder and licked his lips again, hitting his eyes towards the ground afterwards.
'Perhaps it was his perverted mind indeed, but I - and many others - don't think that. Tuberculosis is rare in England. I think perhaps Harness did it on purpose. They wanted to be together, for always. That's what they wrote each other in the letters. So it could be true, right? That Harness helped Byron to an early death so they could move on together. They always wanted to get married by the way, and already had their rings when they were around the age of seventeen. The thing was that gay marriage wasn't allowed in there, so they wanted to escape from there - not that they could marry in another place.'
Alex shook his head now and pulled up a mouth corner.
'Well, then she is an hag indeed.'
Nigel:
He reached out to grab another book and gave Alex another annoyed glance, like hé was the one being stupid now, instead of Nigel. "You're right, it's not.. So why would you say it is?"
He intended to browse through the book once but marked it as useless and threw it aside again the second he opened it.
"Besides.. what's romantic about killing your partner for own benefit? I know I'm not an expert on tedious love matters, but that doesn't sound like a healthy kind of relationship, not even to me."
Nigel almost wanted to ask if Alex had those kind of dreams about him but he decided to stop himself at the last moment. Alex was in a good mood right now, and he liked it to stay that way.
"I don't understand some people, Jack.." he said suddenly followed by a deep sigh, as if this wasn't already extremely obvious. "Why would you marry if you don't have to? Especially with a death sentence on it. What's a couple of rings and a meaningless vow when you're likely to die right after."
Alex:
Alex slapped his hands against his face and shook it afterwards, chuckling breathless and softy as he looked up to the ceiling.
'Oh god,' he mumbled. He took Nigel his shoulder and squeezed it now. 'I think you'll never learn...'
When Nigel suddenly continued speaking, talking about an unhealthy relationship, Alex slapped his hand against his forehead again. For god's sake,' he thought now.
'Forget it,' Alex nagged now as he walked away with this stupid smile on his face. It was a smile of disbelieve. In his eyes, it was unbelievable how Nigel was now. For a moment, he wanted to throw the comment about the Maracleas toward his head. That was practicably the same, right?
'I don't know!' Alex threw back now - a bit too hard. 'Why do you ask me? If they want to marry, then let them. Like we care. It's about the story, Nigel. It's sweet, it's history.'
'You should lower you voice, sir,' the same old hag said now. An old cranky woman stood there, staring at them with expressions like she wanted to kill them.
'Sorry ma'am,' he said now. 'I got a little bit too excited.'
He licked his lips and dropped his gaze speedily on his book again.
Nigel:
"Never learn what?" he demanded, getting irritated now. How was he the one being unreasonable? It was pure logic for Nigel to question this.. Of course that was exactly the point. Nigel saw everything in logic.
He turned away again and muttered under his breath in his defense.
"It's not sweet, it's tragic."
He continued to browse the book then, ignoring the hag and trying to let it go. Alex was right. He'd never learn. He'd never understand this. And he wasn't sure if he even wanted to.
"I'm done here," he said after a while, looking down at the pile of books at his feet. "We don't have enough time to search through it one day, though, so I'm going to have to take them with me.. I used to be a member here, maybe I'm still in their register."
Alex:
Alex decided to ignore Nigel his question. He knew it would only make everything worse anyway. Perhaps he would understand it, one day. Just as Nigel, Alex ignored the hag as well by now. He already told her he would be more quiet now, and honestly Alex didn't even talked after that. Only when Nigel spoke again that he was finished for today, Alex looked up from his book and nodded lightly.
'Okay, sure,' ignoring Nigel his remark about the story. It was tragic indeed, but- whatever. When Nigel told him he was probably still in the register, Alex took Nigel his shoulder and pulled him up - shaking head his head as he stared at him with a serious expression on his face.
'I'm going to lend these books. The government knows you're dead, and they've probably shut everything off since your parents are dead as well. Do you know you were even in a newspaper? I've saved it in the red bible..'
Nigel:
He frowned and nodded. That was probably a better idea. He'd give them quite a fright if he showed up 'dead' in the registers, however that worked.
"You're right, let's go with that. But I'll pay this time."
He picked up the books he'd gathered with both arms and followed after Alex towards the desk at front. His annoyance vaporized immediately when Alex mentioned he had made it to the newspapers and he actually looked pleased.
"Did I? Well you have to show me when we're back."
He slowed down suddenly when Alex said he saved it in his red book and he would've frozen entirely if he didn't force his muscles to go on. His head turned to Alex and for a moment he just stared at him with a moisture of surprise and awe.
"You continued my book..?"
Alex:
'Whatever you want,' Alex mumbled as he shove his hands into his pockets. He nibbled on the inside of his lower lip and walked with Nigel towards the desk where the old familiar hag was standing behind.
For a moment Alex thought about helping Nigel with carrying all these books, but then he found Nigel his face expression way too priceless, so he decided not to say a thing and just to carry on walking.
'Sure, I will. I kept it proper and safe.'
As Nigel suddenly lowered his pass, Alex looked behind his shoulder and frowned his eyebrows. Just as he wanted to ask what was wrong, Nigel already began to speak again - what made a darker frown appear on Alex his forehead.
'Yes. Something in me- this urging feeling... It told me I had to. Why? Shouldn't I've done that?'
Nigel:
He shook his head and looked back ahead again, still quite amazed by the looks of it, though not dissatisfied.
"No, I'm glad you did.. I wanted you to, but I just didn't think you would actually do it."
Nigel put down the books for the lady to scan and just kept on talking like she wasn't even there.
"I mean I thought you were convinced I was gone.. That I wouldn’t come back."
Nigel couldn't quite wrap his head around it. If Alex thought he had betrayed him why did he carry on his work anyway? And Nigel never had dreamt that Nigel had felt it.. the urge to continue the work. He had tried to make contact with Alex so many times but didn't think it succeeded that much. Maybe it had succeeded more time than he had realized, though.
Alex:
Alex inhaled deeply and placed his own book about Byron on top of Nigel his books - but didn't made any eye contact with the hag. His eyes stayed fixed on Nigel's - even when the hag asked him to pay now, and to show his pass. He took his wallet and placed it slowly on the desk, still staring at Nigel suspiciously.
'I had nothing left in life, so I saw nothing else then just taking every little piece of hope that I could get. Though I honestly didn't expected you to come back, I always kept having hope since I had nothing else. It was faith, and promise that I kept. And you served that promise.'
His eyes went towards the hag now as he parted his lips. He got rather shocked when he suddenly saw the disgusting skin she had. She definitely looked like a hag, maybe even more like a troll. The big glasses - which rested on her nose - made her eyes look twice as big, what made Alex step backwards now.
Nigel:
He pursed his lips at Alex' words, still not entirely pleased either by the way things went.
"I'd never break my promise to you, Jack.. It just took longer than expected."
The woman, in return disgusted and confused about what Alex said, quickly got the card through the scanner and then gave it back to Alex hastily.
"There, you have to bring it back in fourteen days. Don't be late!" She shrieked and then she stalked off again to help some customers in the back. Nigel just smiled and picked up the books.
"Alright.. we still have to get the car back and get ready for tonight, so I suggest we move quickly."
Alex:
'I'm glad you're back,' Alex sighed now, as if he tried to close the topic with that final sentence. He pursed his lips and stared incomprehensible at the old lady behind the desk who seemed to be very cranky and smelled disgusting. He narrowed his eyes and slowly took the card back, stroking his thumb over his cheekbone afterwards as if the woman had talked with consumption.
As soon as the lady left again, and Nigel took all the books, Alex slowly took over the books - without even asking it, he just took them out of his hands.
'I'll carry those for you,' he smiled politely, searching for his eyes as soon as he held them close against his chest.
'God, you're right, that damn car... For God sake-'
Nigel:
He smiled to himself and nodded.
"Yes.. so am I."
He was about to walk away but Alex suddenly took over all of the books without further questioning, leaving Nigel to stare at him for a while.
"You're in a good mood.." he mumbled, rather amazed by it, for Alex wasn't often in a good mood at all. "Thanks."
He walked along with Alex and couldn't help but grin slightly amused when Alex started scowling again. He knew he couldn't keep that mood up for long.
"I know.. we're going to have to carry these books all the way there so how about you give me half of it," he suggested and he already moved to Alex to take half of the burden on him, making it easier for the both of them to walk to the busstop for it were quite a lot of books.