Warning(s): Some angst, swearing, mentions of underage drinking, intoxication, dry heaving, gagging & throwing up
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Tara, Mindy, Chad and Ethan were once again over at your and Anika's apartment to hang out with her. She tried to convince you to hang out with them but you weren't interested. Your answer was always the same whenever she asked.
They just weren't your crowd. They weren't in high school and they aren't now. You were fine with that. Anika on the other hand wanted you to get to know them. They were friends with her girlfriend and became her own. She wanted all of you to get along.
She was fully aware of your rocky relationship with Tara but that wasn't going to stop her from trying. Anika only knew a few things; you and tara have hated each other since high school and according to Mindy it started out of the blue.
"Chad I swear to god if you don't stop throwing that blue shell at me," Tara said as she swerved along with her kart on the screen. "It's not my fault your reflexes on Mario Kart suck–" Tara threw a pillow at him "–hey! No pillow throwing."
"Aaaand victory is mine!" Mindy raised her arms victoriously. "Take that losers," she smirked while the rest of them groaned.
"Winner gets to choose where we eat for dinner and I say that diner around the corner." After a few minutes they start to get ready to leave. "Oh hold on one second," Anika said before approaching your bedroom door and knocking.
"Yeah?" She heard you ask from the other side. "We're going to that diner around the corner. You wanna come?" Shit. Anika knew damn well it was your favorite place to eat. The only flaw is that it doesn't deliver.
Your roommate heard groaning and shuffling before the door swung open. "Sure I'm in." You were wearing jeans and a Batman shirt that looked a little too thin for the chill fall weather. "Aren't you going to be a bit cold?" She asked before you rolled your head back and grabbed your older brother's letterman jacket.
"I'll take this. Happy mom?" She rolled her eyes before replying. "Very, now come on."
The walk over was short but you still trailed behind them the entire time. When you all sat in a booth you chose to hide with a menu by holding it up in front of your face. You stared at the menu as if you weren't going to order your usual. Anika and Mindy sit beside you as Ethan, Chad and Tara sit in front of you.
They have multiple conversations that you choose to stay out of until you hear your name. "So, Y/N, you like Batman?" You put down the menu and tilt your head slightly, looking at the curly haired boy who had spoken.
"It's just I noticed your Batman shirt," Ethan continued as he briefly pointed to the shirt you were wearing. "Oh yeah. He's cool. You?" He smiled and nodded.
A conversation between the two of you – that was Ethan asking you questions and you responding with a short answer or hum – eventually picked up. During all this you couldn't help but feel like you were being stared at but chose to ignore it. Your conversation with Ethan was put on pause when the food came. You quietly munched on your fries until Tara spoke up.
"So, Y/N–" here we go "–you only come out of your room for food and the occasional bathroom breaks...you're kind of like a deer." She took a bite of one of her onion rings. "A deer? What– well you're five foot nothin' so I don't know why you're talkin'." You shot back. It wasn't the first time somebody's compared your habits to a deer.
"I'm five foot one!" She defended with a scoff before you responded. "But who's keeping track, right? And speaking of which–" everybody at the table were now staring at the both of you "–why are you keeping track of my routine anyways?"
"Oh you are so full of it," Tara said with her arms now crossed. "Full of what? I haven't accused you of anything yet my little stalker. Simply just asking," you shrugged while wearing a smug look that Tara wanted to ki- smack right off your face.
"Don't you still sleep with a Spider-Man plushie?" Tara retorted before sipping her milkshake, her eyes never leaving you. "Technically I don't sleep with him, he sits on my nightstand. Wait– how do you know about him?" You asked with tilt in your head.
Tara suddenly avoided your stare as she twirled her straw in her milkshake. "You mentioned it at some point," she finally murmured.
"You remembered that?" She remembered that? Even you couldn't remember mentioning that to her until now.
"It's not a big deal. Not like it's a hard thing to remember." It suddenly got quiet between the two of you. All of them eventually drifted off into their own conversation as you silently nibbled on another one of your fries.
Suddenly you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket. The message you read causes you to freeze and your eyes to widen.
Dad (8:56 pm) I'm coming over this weekend.
"Shit," you mutter and Anika turns over to you. "What's wrong?" she asks but then her eyes catch the message you're still staring at. Before she could say anything else you were already typing away.
Y/N (8:58 pm) Tomorrow?
You started to push down on your thumb's cuticles with your index finger while waiting for a response.
Dad (9:01 pm) Yes
Tomorrow was Saturday and you were originally going to help Tara with one of her assignments and then play video games at Henry's place but not anymore. Now you're going to get stuck with your father. It wasn't an ideal situation. You and him never got along.
You were never his favorite and that was alright with you cause he was never yours. All he did was bring problems. If he wasn't busy cheating on your mom then he was nit picking at you and every little thing you did. No matter what you did you just couldn't be enough for him.
A foot gently tapping your own from under the table pulled you out of your thoughts. You looked up to see Tara with her eyebrows furrowed. You simply cleared your throat and shook her head a bit, trying to show you were fine. She looked you up and down – not believing you one bit – before turning back to her conversation with Chad.
You felt a hand on your shoulder and you turned your head to find Anika. "Are you gonna need the apartment this weekend? It's not a problem if you do," she asked and reassured you.
"No, I think I'm just gonna take him out for dinner. Besides, he only knows where I'm attending college. He doesn't know where I live and I'd like to keep it that way," you murmured back before sipping your milkshake. You saw her nod from the corner of your eye before she turned back to Mindy.
When you all left the diner you and Tara went back to your bickering. Chad rubbed his stomach before letting out a tiny groan. "Shit, I shouldn't have drank the milkshake and soda." Mindy rolled her eyes and replied, "I told you not to drink both."
You and Tara were slightly ahead of the group. "Yeah bu– are those ghost socks?" You asked, cutting yourself off. Tara looked down at her socks for a second before looking back at you. "Yeah, and?" You put out your bottom lip as you shook your head. "Nothing. I think you look cute in them. Anyways back to the point I was making–" Tara didn't hear much after the word "cute."
Why are you acting as if you didn't just call her cute? Were you doing this on purpose? Making her feel like this? Like butterflies were flying around in her stomach? Surely you knew. This had to be another one of your tactics. Another way for you to get inside her hea–
"Watch out for dog shit," you said as you pulled her by the waist and away from the crap she was about to step on. When you removed your hand from her waist she almost missed it. Almost.
"You okay?" She turned her head to look up at you. "Yeah, fine." Tara responded before looking back ahead.
Mindy and Anika watched the whole interaction. They gave each other a silent look before continuing their own conversation.
"You seem out of it." Tara gave you a raised eyebrow before you elaborated. "I just mean, usually you would've had a rebuttal for me by now. You doin' okay?" You were now fully looking at her and she hated the concern in your eyes.
She turned her head, no longer able to handle your stare. "I said I was fine, didn't I?" Tara crossed her arms. You gave her a tight lipped look before sighing, "Okay then..."
When you all got back to your apartment you placed your leftovers on the counter. Just as you were about to go to your room your phone started ringing.
You tense up before saying, "I'm gonna take this," and going to your bedroom. Leaving Anika and the rest of them in the living room.
You silently sighed in relief as you heard your mom's voice. The call itself didn't take too long. It was just her checking in, making sure your father told you about him being in Manhattan this weekend – as vague as he was – and that her and your younger brother, Stephen, would be joining you and him for dinner. You had zero complaints to this as you did not want to be left alone with your father.
When you stepped out of your room you completely forgot people were over. You stopped in your tracks as their heads turned to you for a brief moment, Tara was biting on her nails but dropped them from her mouth as soon as she saw you and looked back at the TV.
"Great, you're all still here," you said sarcastically before sitting down in the loveseat. Anika kicked your feet due to your blatant comment.
"Be nice," she mouthed. You lifted your legs to rest on the loveseat's armrest. You had no idea why you were sitting out here anyway. Originally you had come out of your room thinking they had left. You definitely weren't in the mood for company.
But when are you ever?
"Oh um, Tara I'm not gonna make it tomorrow," you told her after a few minutes of silence. "Why?" Tara sinked further into the couch when she realized she sounded more disappointed than she intended.
"I'm getting dragged off to this dinner thing tomorrow but I'll make it up to you," you simply answered before standing up and walking over to the kitchen. Mindy looked at you as you walked then to Tara with raised eyebrows.
"What?" Tara asked with a bored tone. "I'll make it up to you~" Mindy mocked while dramatically fluttering her eyelashes.
"Shut up."
—
You haven't seen your father since you moved to Woodsboro your sophomore year. You didn't even see him after were attacked by ghostface. Not that you expected any less from him, this was just the type of man he was. When you get to the restaurant the first people you see are your younger brother and mom.
She greets you with a kiss to the cheek and you and your brother settle for a simple nod. Once you're all seated you ask the question that's been on the tip of your tongue since you walked in. "So, where's dad?" Your mom sighed before answering. A sigh you knew all too well. "He's on his way. There was just a little traffic. Stop worrying honey, leave that for the adults." She looked at you with a gentle smile to ease her words.
You exhale through your nose, lightly moving your index finger against the glass cup set in front of you. I am an adult, you wanted to say but this wasn't the place for that. Not now.
"What's college like?" Stephen asked, pulling you from your thoughts. You continued to stare at the glass as you answered him. "Still there." You could hear your mom clear her throat. You moved your eyes to look at her before moving them back to the glass. "Some of the classes are actually worth looking forward to so I guess that's something."
"Well that's good. You've been keeping up with your studies?" You nodded. Before she could get another word out you felt a familiar grip on your shoulder. "Sorry I'm late. Traffic."
"Dad," you heard your brother say. "Hey, buddy. How was the train?" Your father asked as he took the vacant space beside your mom. "It was okay," Stephen answered.
"Y/N." You finally looked over to him. "Dad," you responded less enthusiastically than your brother. Stephen and your mom shared a look before you heard her speak. "Do you two know what you want?" She asked you and your brother.
Stephen nodded and you hummed.
"So, did Stephen tell you yet?" Your father asked. You looked at him then to Stephen, saying, "Tell me what?"
Your father wore a proud grin as he spoke, "He's going to be a cop. Just like his old man and I couldn't be prouder." Your mom let out a silent sigh, knowing where the night was headed. "That's great," you took a sip of your water.
"Isn't it? He's going to be great." Stephen nervously chuckled before finally saying something. "It's not a big deal. I'm just thinking about it." Your father shook his head, "It's a calling, bud and you're going to do amazing." He sounded nothing but proud.
You gave a small smile to your brother before turning back to your glass. You expected no less from tonight. You knew your father couldn't be here five minutes without being 'Officer Y/L/N.' That was your relationship with him growing up. It seemed like he knew more about being a cop than how to be your dad.
The waitress came with the food and left and the interrogation began. "So," your father started, "you've been staying out of trouble?" You rolled your eyes.
"Course' I have." He grunted at your answer and responded, "There's no need for an attitude. I have plenty of reasons to ask you that or did you forget about the shit you did in Brooklyn?"
You roll your eyes again. "That was years ago. I don't do that stuff anymore." He eyed you before picking up his fork and knife, cutting through his chicken. "Mhm, kay," you heard him mutter with doubt laced in his tone and you clenched your jaw.
"And stop rolling your eyes. It's a bad habit," he added before taking a bite of his food. You subconsciously closed your eyes for a second as you felt yourself about to roll your eyes again. He always found something to nitpick at.
The rest of the night continued to go on like that. Your father continued to bring up your track record to get a rise out of you and you responded back with quips as you picked at your own skin under the table.
Not much has changed since you were fifteen.
The best news you got all night was that your father would be heading home the same night. You felt relief wash over you as you heard him say that. And as much as you love your mom and brother, you were glad they had their own ride home because you were simply too exhausted to be behind a wheel tonight.
You were walking to your apartment when you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket. You took it out to find a text from Anika.
Nik (10:53 pm) Hey! I went to carvel today, there's a chocolate and vanilla twist waiting for you in the freezer
You slightly smiled, now off to the side and leaning against a shutter. You replied to the message, giving a quick thanks, before only putting in the right side of your headphones in and continuing your walk to your apartment.
A hotdog stand caught your attention. The smell was alluring and you felt your stomach grumble. Damn it. You just came back from dinner but of course you were still hungry. It was dinner with your father. You never got much eating done, choosing to use your mouth for arguing rather than chewing and swallowing.
You knew how unreliable street food was but at the moment you truly didn't care. You chose to stick with a simple order, a hotdog with ketchup drizzled top. You got a Dr Pepper from a store nearby before sitting down on a bench and eating. This was the most at peace you felt all night. Sitting on a bench, listening to music, eating a hotdog and washing it down with Dr Pepper.
If only that peace lasted.
When you got home you went to turn on the light, not expecting them to be on since Anika was supposed to be out with Mindy, but you realized they were already on. You furrowed eyebrows. Anika usually doesn't forget something like that.
"Anika?" You called out, reaching for the bat you hid under your couch when you first moved in. After a few seconds you heard her reply, "Y/N? Yeah in here!" It sounded like she was in the bathroom. You reluctantly put the bat back before going over to the bathroom.
"Hey what's wro–" You cut yourself off when you see an ill looking Tara hunched over your toilet. Mindy was holding her hair back as Anika turned to you. "Hey um, sorry to just drop this on you. I know you probably had a long night but could you help us with something?"
You gave Tara one more glance before answering, "Yeah of course. What do you need?" You could hear Tara gagging. "Can you keep an eye on her while we get her some supplies from the pharmacy?" You nodded and murmured, "Course.' "
You switched places with Mindy, lifting Tara's hair and even pushing a few extra strands from her face. She was clearly drunk and you couldn't help but admit you hated seeing her like this. You didn't go to as many parties as she did but from what you've heard most of her free nights end with her being drunk.
"You're never gonna let me forget this, are you?" Tara said in between gags. You subconsciously moved one of your hands to her lower back, softly rubbing in circles.
"What? You think I like seeing you like this?" You asked genuinely. Surely she knew you didn't...right? Seeing her in such an unhealthy state only brought a feeling of– well you couldn't find the right word for what you felt. But you knew it wasn't anything positive.
"Don't you?" She slurred, clearly she hadn't puked up all the alcohol just yet. You exhale through your nose, taking your hand off her lower back to reach into your pocket to grab a hair tie. Tara missed the contact but refused to say anything. Only pouting at yourself for even thinking such a thing.
You run your hands through her hair, brushing it back and tying it in a loose but secure ponytail. You push a single loose strand behind her ear causing your knuckles to brush against her cheek. Tara's breath hitches and she blushes, due to your touch.
Goodness, what were you doing to her?
"No. I don't," you finally answered. She went to say something but was cut off by dry heaving and your hand immediately went back to her lower back, continuing to rub gentle circles.
You could hear the faint sound of your front door opening and a few seconds later the bathroom door slowly opened.
"Hey, we got everything," Anika told you. You turned your head to see her with a pharmacy bag. You and Anika got Tara to the couch in one piece while Mindy was in the kitchen setting up everything Tara would need. "Oh Y/N, before I forget. Tara's staying the night because Sam will freak out if she comes home like this," Anika told you as you wiped the remnants of drool and throw up off Tara's face. You thought for a second before responding,"Okay, she can take my bed." Tara was now passed out cold on the couch, hugging a pillow close to her chest.
"Are you sure?" Your roommate asked and you hummed. "Listen, we may hate each other but my mom raised me right. I'm not leaving her on the couch. Besides, I'm assuming Mindy's also staying to keep an eye on her and you two shouldn't have to get stuck cuddling on a couch all night."
After Anika hesitantly agreed, you set up your bed and then went back to the couch to find Tara still fast asleep. You lifted her bridal style and started the walk to your room. Tara mumbled something incoherent before her eyes fluttered open. She seemed confused as she looked around then up at you. "It's okay, go to sleep," you said in a soft voice that made Tara's cheeks warm.
Once you placed her in your bed you put the covers over and gently lifted her head to put a pillow under her. Her eyes were once again shut, you assumed she fell asleep again and looked at her for a moment before leaving the room but not without leaving the door open by a sliver. Just in case anything happened and she needed you– or anyone.
When Tara woke up she instantly noticed the pounding headache she had and groaned. She rubbed her temples and after a minute she took a look around. This was not her room. Has she been kidnapped? But it was then when all the memories from last night came rushing to her.
All the embarrassing memories. She could remember starting off with a shot...then two...then three...then she woke up to Anika and Mindy helping her up and walking her out of the party. She had complained about not wanting to go back to her own place because Sam would kill her so Anika and Mindy brought her to Anika's apartment instead and Mindy messaged Sam that they were staying the night at her house.
After that she felt like throwing up...and she did. Then she didn't stop for a while. And then– oh this is when the embarrassment comes in. That's when you came home and Anika asked you to help while they went out for supplies.
Oh, you were so gentle with her. She almost let out a dreamy sigh while looking back until she caught herself. Snap out of it, Carpenter, she scolded herself. But then another memory of you carrying her bridal style to your bed and tucking her in appeared.
No. Mindy wasn't right and Tara still despised you. You were still the same asshole from high school.
She heard two soft knocks on the door and looked over to see you carrying a plate of scrambled eggs. "Didn't know if you were awake," you murmured. You walked over and placed them beside the water bottle and aspirin you left for her the night before.
"Anika made some scrambled eggs and eggs are good for hangovers, so..." You awkwardly shifted back and forth on your feet with your arms behind your back, your hands holding onto each other. "I'm gonna go." And with that you left the room, not waiting for a response from Tara.
After five minutes, Tara finally leaves your bedroom. "There she is," Mindy smiled at her before putting a grape in her mouth. "So loud," Tara mumbled while lifting a hand to her head.
She lifted herself onto the stool beside Anika and Mindy and put her head down. But she lifted her head slightly and shifted her eyes, noticing a certain her nuisance wasn't there to bother her or call her princess.
"Where's Y/N?" She asked in her morning voice. "Your lover girl had a morning shift at the cafe," Mindy answered. Tara didn't have the energy to make a retort or argue back saying, "She's not my lover girl." She settled with putting her head back down with heavy eyes.
"What time is Sam expecting us?" Anika asked her girlfriend who answered, "Eleven so we should probably get ready soon."
After a few minutes Tara went back to your bedroom to gather her stuff when suddenly she realized she didn't recognize the hoodie she was wearing. She looked down and saw Spider-Man at the center of the hoodie, putting up his hands to form a heart. She could recall seeing you wearing this around campus before and noted that it smelled like you. She could never admit that she actually appreciated the gesture considering the tank top you put it over wasn't doing anything to keep her warm.
It wouldn't hurt to keep the hoodie, right?
She looked over at the scrambled eggs you had brought in for her before sitting down on the edge of the bed, swinging her feet as she thought to herself. Guess it wouldn't hurt to eat the eggs. It was Anika who made it after all. She ate a few bites over your nightstand before taking a sip of water and took an aspirin.
When she got back home she greeted Sam before laying down on her bed and replaying last night over and over again and how she had to face you in class the next day.
—
When Tara got to class you greeted her as if nothing happened. "Hey, you look like you just got run over by a truck," you said, causing her to roll her eyes at you. "Oh do I?" She asked rhetorically and took out her laptop.
Throughout class her mind kept trailing back to your gentleness towards her that night. All Anika told you to do was watch her. She didn't tell you to wipe the drool and throw up off her face, put her hair in a ponytail or rub her back as she gagged.
The fact that you had somehow found your way into her head was pissing Tara off. So pissed in fact that instead of going about her usual routine with you she just chose to ignore you.
You weren't sure why Tara was ignoring you. Obviously something seemed off with her but you had no idea what. Was she mad at you? She didn't seem her usual mad, this was different. She's never taken her aggression out by ignoring you. By using colorful words? Yeah. But never with silence.
Oh.
You must've done something terrible. But what?
As you walked to your next class you tried to look back at what you could've possibly done. You hadn't done anything you haven't done before. Just your usual banter with Tara, nothing out of the norm. By the time you got to your apartment later that day you were still trying to figure out what you could've done. This shouldn't be stressing you out as much as it was. It was just Tara after all.
Anika noticed your distressed state and walked to the kitchen, a minute later coming back with your chocolate and vanilla twist and handing it to you. "Thanks," you said as you took the ice cream from your roommate.
"Wanna talk about what's got you like this?" She asked you, moving to sit in the love seat. You moved the spoon around a bit in your ice cream before answering. "I just...I don't know what I did but T– this person is giving me the silent treatment and I just don't know why. I've been trying to come up with something I could've done to get that treatment but nothing's coming to me," you finally said as Anika nodded along and listened.
"Well, you can be kind of an asshole sometimes. Seems like you've thought pretty hard on this. You care a lot for this person?" She suddenly asked. You almost wanted to laugh. Would Anika be asking this if she knew you were talking about Tara?
"Oh, goodness no. She's just an– acquaintance? I guess you can say. If you even wanna call her anything," you answered her. "You seem pretty sure of that," she stated with a tone of doubt.
"Cause' I am." You responded trying to sound certain. "Then why care so much if she's ignoring you? If you don't care about her then you shouldn't care if she's giving you the silent treatment," Anika continued as you sat there and took in every word.
"I could easily move past this whole thing and forget about it entirely if I wanted to," you defended not so convincingly. "Okay. Then move past it," she challenged.
"Alright, I will then," you said. "You're gonna lose sleep over this," Anika confidently said as she walked away to her room. You huffed as you ate your ice cream. I won't lose sleep over Tara freakin' Carpenter.
Later that night you were sprawled on your bed...and thinking about Tara.