"Then, Chen Miao, can you confidently tell me that not once, while you were with me, have you recalled the face that I made when I killed you?"
His eyes widened and his body went rigid from your question. Was he really not bothered by the fact that you murdered him? No, of course not. He does care about that.
You might not remember but Chen Miao has always loved you.
Once or twice in the past, he recalled there was a time when he had the chance to harm you, but he couldn't. There was you, pinning him down on the floor as your hands squeezed his throat. Your eyes were cloudy; it wasn't you, you were controlled, you would never harm him, he tried to convince himself as he used all his willpower not to grab the nearby weapon and injure you.
That's why none of the players was able to win this game; because the only way to win was to kill the villainess before the world itself tried to kill them, but how can the player kill her when the protagonist himself prevented them from doing so? Hence, from the beginning, what the players were playing was simply a hopeless, unwinnable game where they were destined to die no matter what.
"Have you never ever been plagued by the nightmares of your deaths? Do you, really, don't resent me at all?" He saw how heartbroken you looked as you squeezed his cheeks. "You shouldn't be so foolishly kind, Chen Miao. It's a different story if you don't remember. At least I could pretend that it isn't this version of you that I killed, but when you do remember, I feel too guilty to even appear in front of you."
Foolishly kind? The protagonist has never associated himself with that trait. Of course he had nightmares. Of course at his most vulnerable moment, he felt resentful, but it's not directed towards you. Never you. The blame lies on those who used the two of you like a puppet on the strings. You weren't the one at fault. After all, he knew your circumstances better than you could ever understand them.
"Then feel guilty," he held the hands that were touching his cheeks as he smiled. "Feel guilty and make up for it by loving me."
ーjust like the old days.
There was something that you didn't know, that you didn't remember. You weren't a villainess, and he wasn't a protagonist. Once upon a time, the two of you were created as a pair, two lovebirds that only see each other. You may think that you were harassing him, forcing him, molesting him, and that he resented you for doing that to him, but that was wrong. He liked it. His insecurity in the past was the sole reason why you would do that to him, and he gained confidence when you took the lead, and now even after you don't remember, such behaviour was like a habit to you but you only do that to him.
He was glad that even in this state, you subconsciously kept your promise; you only look at him, see only him, and reserved your love only for him.
He is yours as much as you are his.
After so long, he was finally able to see you speechless by his words. This time, it was your turn to have your blood rise to your face.
"Why someone like me?" He heard you ask in a whisper-like tone.
ーbecause it can only be you.
But he couldn't say it, not when there are too many gazes prying upon the two of you, not when that eyesore of a system was looking at him in disbelief, and not when that woman is watching. She will definitely ruin you further if she heard.
So he merely smile, with a shy gaze, and cheeks blushing redーjust like the way you liked itーand he leaned down to kiss your forehead, oblivious to the people in the comments who were exploding in excitement at the sight of a 'tragic' romance between two NPCs.
I love you very much.
Chen Miao had told you that if you felt guilty, then you should repay him by loving him, and although you don't consider that punishment at all, it at least help lessen the guilt. You knew that you were acting quite shameless for a person who wanted Chen Miao to hate you for what you had done, but if insisting would only make him unhappy, then so be it, you don't mind being called shameless anyway.
However, looking at the chat screen floating in the air, you then were reminded of one more important thing that you kept on forgetting.
"Ah Miao," you held his hands gently. "Where did you hide Kai?"
You felt the air shift and for a second, you saw his eyes glance at the system floating behind you before he quickly moved his gaze back to yours, as gently as before. His action was so fast that it might as well be an illusion.
"Why does that matter?"
『our kai matters, okay!』
『you wouldn't be asking that if the one held hostage right now is your beloved!』
"It matters because Kai is important," you quickly realized what you said so before he got the wrong idea, you continued. "You see, Chen Miao, I've been told that as long as Kai's circumstances aren't resolved, you won't have to be controlled by the players anymore, so what I'm saying is, hide him properly, and more importantly, don't let him die, okay?"
『wtf??? did i hear that right???』
『how could you? i thought we were on the same side npc (QAQ)』
『lmao, she really just decided to fuck it all and became a villain alongside chen miao』
『look at chen miao's expression, he clearly didn't expect this lol』
『this is true love haha』
Chen Miao helplessly looked at your determined expression. The look that you gave him told him that had he told you he killed a person, you would definitely help him bury the body, and he can't help but felt flattered and sad. Flattered because he's your top priority, sad because circumstances had clouded your morality, turning it into ambiguity, but then again, who is he to judge you when he's also the same when it comes to you?
For you, he would definitely turn this world upside down and rescue you. No matter how many atrocities he would commit right now and in the future, it's worth it because he's doing it in order to be together with you again.
Unfortunately, he can't let you involve yourself in this furtherーnot after the length he had gone to protect you.
"I'm sorry," his apology was uttered with a heartbroken expression that confused you.
Chen Miao's fingers made their way to the back of your earlobe, pressing something that you never knew existed. In a second, your body and mind stopped functioning by itself and you fell into his embrace, like a machine that has been shut down.
Chen Miao held you dearly as he whispered his apology repeatedly to you. However, his eyes were focused on the silent system behind you, as if speechless.
"Why did you approach her?" He asked quietly, holding back the rage and betrayal inside of him. "Isn't it enough that you've already clouded her judgment, tampered with her memories, and deceived her heart? Must you cause further pain to her?"
「Wheー When did I do that ah?! I'm just a poor worker doing my job. Don't slander me like that!」The system shook in anger.
"Then tell your boss to stop and back off," he warned. "Haven't anyone taught any of you not to covet something that wasn't made for you? This girl clearly belongs to me. She's not someone who you can simply use and discard like trash."
The system then made a noise akin to someone yelling before another voice that clearly doesn't belong to it told the system to "step aside," before that new voice took over.「I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but we really didn't have any intention to harm her. We, simply, sought her help to search for our actor, which I guess you probably know where he is right now.」
The protagonist didn't answer, merely glaring at the system while holding the villain close to his chest, like a lion that's protecting its cub.
「This is hard,」the system sighed.「As expected, this season is a failure yet again.」
He still refused to speak.
「Please tell me where he is. I can't shut this world down if you're going to be this stubborn.」It said helplessly.
"So?" He snickered. "All the more reason not to give him to you."
「You're probably confused right now,」it sighed.「Just so you know, if not shutting this world down is a blessing to you, then we will have no choice but to threaten you by deleting this world instead.」
Chen Miao seemed surprised. "You won't dare."
「Why not? That actor has already signed up an agreement that if something were to happen to him during his stay in this game, the blame doesn't lie on us. We have already tried our best to save him. Not our fault that he can't be rescued.」
The protagonist knew. He's pretty sure that the system is bluffing, but even if there's a slight 0.01% that it's real, he can't help but felt anxious for your safety. He can't take a gamble if it involved your life.
So Chen Miao relented, slowly pulling himself away from you as he went to the old television in the storage room. With a knock of his fingers, one can see the sight of a person looking awfully similar to Kai. At a glance, one would think that this television was used to monitor the transfer student, and although it's not wrong, this television is more than that.
The system watched carefully; the actor was trapped inside a white room with no door or window. There's not even a hole to escape. Except for a single bed, the room was empty, and it can see that there are drawings on the screen. The first drawing was a shower head, the second was a cupcake, the third was a ball, and the last one was a hammer. It somehow reminded the system of an old game it once played when it was little. What was it called again? Pet simulation game?
Then, as if the system realized something, it looked at the protagonist in horror.
"Why so surprised?" He smiled in schadenfreude. "Didn't you people treat me like this too? I am just merely returning the favour. Look, I have been raising him well. I tend to his meals, pat him when he behaves, play balls with him when he's bored, and talk to him when he's lonely. I didn't even use the hammer on him when he's misbehaving."
He then tapped on the screen, right on top of Kai's image, and the system can see the transfer student blankly waking up from his slumber. He looked delirious.
"I'm tempted to use the hammer on him though. I have never got the chance to after all. I wonder, will he just feel a slight pain, or will his brain splatter out?" The protagonist sighed regretfully. "What do you think?"
「... Fuck, boss, I can't do this anymore. He's gone mental!」The system suddenly cried out in anguish.「You talk to him, boss. This is giving me trauma.」
At that moment, Chen Miao can hear the slight chuckle of a woman. Strangely, his heart palpitated. After all, she sounded like you.
「Ah Miao, have you been playing around enough?」The system spoke, this time, using a voice and tone that sound oddly similar to yours; playful and flirty.