Unedited;
Sometimes, it's hard but we need to let go of certain people and embrace new ones.
Habib is now five months old and Asmau can't believe how time flies. She loves every growth of this young lad and she can't wait to see him become a full-grown man. The best thing ever is having to birth such a handsome boy and the best thing is being a mother to a child. She can't wait to be called, honestly, the world's best mother.
She was on a video call with Ummita who kept playing with Habib who was beginning to learn how to sit on his own. Ummita kept praising Asmau for being a strong woman and a good mother. They always keep up with each other on everything happening and Asmau can't be more grateful for the kind of people she has around her. Without their endless support, she doesn't know what she would have done or how she would have coped in such a cruel world.
They spent about 30 mins still on the video call when Usman's calls kept coming in. She kept rejecting_the idea to call him back once the video call ended but his calls were becoming too much and she got worried. "I'll call you back later, Ussy is calling," She said to Ummita who gave her permission and ended the call. Asmau quickly dialled Usman who picked up at the first ring.
"I guess you are busy but you need to get ready, I'll come to fetch you," Usman said immediately, something about his voice sounded off and Asmau knew something unusual was up.
"What's wrong? Where are we going?" She asked, almost immediately.
"Bad news! Baba Hamdan is dead. His janaza is in an hour!" He sadly replied and Asmau felt her cells withered away. Her expression fell and tears filled her eyes. "Inna lillahi wa inna illaihi rajiun" She whispered, feeling immense pain as the call came to an end. The last time they saw him was just two days back, he was in critical condition and this was expected but it is so hard to accept. The smile he flashed her, and how he had managed to carry Habib on his sick bed, all those thoughts came back running to her mind and she felt all types of emotions.
Lost another father, again!
She didn't know how to react, she only allowed her tears to drop as she quickly got herself and Habib ready to go to Dandachi's household.
Throughout the trip, her mind was bothered by Aman and how he must be feeling. She can't even imagine, but she knew he was in severe pain.
Time went on fast and Mr. Hamdan Dandachi, the truest and most loving person Asmau has ever come across was buried, peacefully.
It was indeed a painful loss but we say nothing other than that which pleases Allah; May Allah have mercy upon him, Aameen.
Aman went into hiding, in another word, he disappeared after his father was buried so he could grief alone. It was his thing, and he just wanted to cry without anyone asking him to stop, he wanted to be vulnerable without being asked to be strong, he just wanted to be alone even though he knew he was supposed to stay with Maryam who was having it tough too.
A week passed by and Asmau didn't set her eyes on Aman, she missed him, so much more than words could express. She wanted to be there for him during this agonizing time of his life just the way he was there for her when she was in distress. She wanted to comfort and tell him it was okay, he can survive, he just needs to breathe, the same way he had seen her through her tough time but he was nowhere to be found.
Only Usman knew where he was at, not even Maryam was allowed to visit him. Asmau spent the week consoling Maryam over her loss and Maryam sure appreciated it. The first week without a father would have been worse if not for her husband and Asmau who were there, all through it. Even her own brother was finding it hard to face her, but she won't reprimand him for anything since she also understood what he was going through. Despite the fact that they expected this, they weren't prepared for it.
The next day being a Wednesday, Aman appeared in front of Asmau, Maryam and Usman, forcing out a smile even though they all knew it was a facade. Maryam ran to him and hugged him tight, it was such an emotional sight for them all to see.
When everyone settled down, Aman and Asmau finally got a time to themselves. She wanted to say something but suddenly, was lost of words as if her mouth got shut in. After few minutes, she finally found her voice;
"I'm sorry!" She voiced out, and Aman slanted his gaze over to her.
"I'm sorry for your loss. May Allah grant Baba Jannah, he was truly a good man and... you are indeed his product" her voice remained calm.
Aman genuinely smiled_ one thing he loves to hear is good compliments about his father, it's enough to lift up his spirit and give him the strength to carry on his father's legacy.
•••
It was barely two weeks after Hamdan Dandachi's death that his brother, Bala Dandachi took over Hamdan's biggest property which was the company.
Maryam wanted to sue him in court and fight for their rights since they have 50% over the company but their uncle is trying to maneuver everything to himself and his children but Aman stopped her.
"Brother! I can't let this happen to us. We know how much effort Dad put into this company all because of us and now? Uncle wants it all for himself despite the fact that he naturally doesn't even have right over it!" Maryam cried out, painfully and angrily.
"But Baba gave him 50% despite everything..." Aman tried to speak but angry Maryam chipped in. "And the remaining 50? It belongs to us so why is he trying to take it all?"
"We expected this, didn't we? Why are you troubled by it despite the fact that we foresaw all of these to happen when Baba is no longer here" Aman snapped.
"We can't trail their path, remember what Baba used to say? We should always treat violence with peace. We all know this would happen anyway, I'm not surprised and I know you aren't also surprised but you just don't wanna accept it and I get, I truly get your point but we are better than this Maryam. We are better off without the company, and Baba knew this!" Saying this, something changed in his tone and face, Maryam became curious.
"What do you mean? Baba knew?" She asked. "Yes, Baba knew that Uncle would take over the company. He trusted a few other assets with his lawyer friend and all of them are in our names. Besides, they are just for future needs, we are good for now, aren't we?" He asked, smiling and Maryam's fury subsided hearing that. Aman pulled her into a comforting hug and that lasted for a few minutes.
Now, they've only got each other.
*•*•*•*•*
Seven months later, Habib would be clocking a year the next day, actually in the next six hours and Asmau is still amazed by how fast time flies. Seeing her baby move about on his own, being able to say something, it's all so beautiful.
All through these months, Aman has been nothing but supportive. He was there, right beside her when Habib whispered out his first word and that was "Umma"
That day was beautiful and the love she felt was out of the world, it was incredible. Aman was there too, when Habib took his first step, he was the happiest and the fact that Habib recognized him so much that he always cries whenever Aman was leaving, was beautiful. Asmau wishes to have Aman by her side all the time but... it's just a wish.
She has come to love him so much that she doesn't know for how long she would be able to hold out on her feelings.
Her phone started ringing, bringing her out of her reverie. She recognized the caller and a smile curved out of her lips "Are you on your way already?" She asked, enthusiastically. "Well... I'm sorry, something came up and I doubt if I would be able to make it back to Bristol sooner" His voice came up, sore yet thick. He was feeling bad and he wished he could make it so they could carry on the initial plan of celebrating Habib's first year on earth somewhere in Bristol but here... he is stuck in Birmingham.
Asmau felt as her heart squirmed in pain, aarrgghh! She wanted to cry but held her tears in. "It's okay. It's fine you don't have to worry"
"Just take care and... be careful, stay safe, we will be fine here!" She wasn't sounding convincing no matter how hard she tried to act like it was fine, it wasn't because she had planned out a beautiful day together with Aman and her little boy. The thought of his absence truly didn't help at all, she felt sad. She wanted him to be there to celebrate her son, he has been a big part of Habib's existence despite not being his father and there was no better way to appreciate him than on Habib's first birthday.
And she knew for sure that even Habib would have a tough time spending his first birthday without Aman by his side, playing with him. She had managed to comfort him today when he kept having mood swings and unnecessary cries, she knew it was because of Aman's absence and now again, she will have to go through that much stress tomorrow.
"Are you sure?" Aman asked, breaking the awkward silence.
"Huh?"
"You all will be fine without me tomorrow?"
"Well... we will manage!" She let out a sore chuckle
"Okay then. Do send all my love and kisses to my little champ, I'll see him a day after his birthday in sha Allah" He implored and Asmau nodded a yes.
Asmau had the most lonely night, at some point when it was hard to fall asleep she went into Habib's baby room which was decorated by Aman. The room was painted with a mixture of purple and creamy colors, Aman came up with the color and decor, it's absolutely lovely and she was sure when Habib grows up, he would love the room just as much.
She looked around the room, almost filled up with gifts both opened and closed, that widened her smile, now thinking about Aman. He has been nothing but a blessing, an even better replacement. She began checking a few things around the room, she found the baby photo album by Aman. He captured almost all memorable times in Habib's life so far, from the time he was born, the first time he smiled, his naming ceremony, the time he began to sit on his own when he started crawling to when he began to stand... every single moment was captured and that brought tears to Asmau.
Her eyes flickered over to the hand and foot print maker, it was from Aman too. She saw the growth process of her baby boy, from his tiny hands and feet when he was just three weeks to now that he is almost a year... she doesn't know what she was feeling, but she knew that Aman is everything and more a woman like her would ever need.
•••
The next day, Usman and his wife came by and took Asmau and little Habib to the biggest park in Bristol. A lovely place with an atmosphere filled with light and joy. They had so much fun and Habib didn't cry like Asmau had expected him to, he seemed not to feel Aman's absence; such a relief.
After a fun morning, they headed to a regional eatery for their lunch. The eatery's setting and style are commendable, they totally enjoyed their stay there and the food was appetizing. Later on, Habib was taken to one of the biggest baby shops in Bristol called Little Bud's Boutique; they got him new wears. After the fun and all, they headed back to Usman's house.
All through the day, Asmau noticed something unusual with Maryam but she didn't prod as she doesn't want to be nosy.
While Maryam played with Habib in the room, Asmau was in the living room watching tv until she heard the front door creaking open. She didn't give it much thought, thinking it was Usman who had gone out to pray that had returned until she reluctantly swivelled her head over and saw the last person she ever expected to see today.
"Aman???!!" She called out and jumped on her feet as the young man walked in, holding a smile and Usman followed him in.
"I thought you wouldn't be able to make it today!" She screamed again, excitedly.
"I couldn't afford to miss my little buddy's birthday. I mean... I might get sued for that!" He joked, and Asmau laughed knowing he wasn't the type to joke easily.
"Where is the big boy?" He asked as Asmau couldn't hide her excitement
"Here he is! Brother you are here!" Maryam appeared with little Habib, upon seeing Aman, the little boy jumped on him, looking so excited.
Maryam hugged her brother while he kept playing with Habib who kept giggling. "How was the journey?" Asmau asked, her smile was still there, never leaving her facials.
"Alhamdulillah" He answered as they settled down. They had one cute family talk together. Talks were exchanged so as smiles.
It was truly the best birthday Habib could ever ask for as always, Aman came with gifts.