"how weird is it that Kendall isn't here." Kalani says as she sets her dance bag down
"there's only seven of us." Nia says
"if you need someone in your group dance i'm willing to do it." mom says
"after that mom dance years ago? absolutely not." i say
"i am available!" mom says
"no! you'll embarrass Clara!" i say
"she's already embarrassed Clara with that mom dance." Chloe says
"she's an automatic victim." i sigh
"i'm not that bad!" mom says
"yes you are!" Chloe says
mom laughs
"you ready girls?" Cheryl comes out
"yes!" i beam
"let's get started." Cheryl says
"moms do you want to come in for a little bit?"
"oh sure" Holly says
i take my dance bag and i set it in the rehearsal space
"just looking back at last week..fifth place is not good enough and now i have a feel of the competition and i have a feel of what the judges appreciate so just all going to be about technique with the emotion..this week we are competing in Allbasis California at Invitation Dance" Cheryl announces
"the group number is going to be a lyrical piece"
THANK god.
"it's called the Conven."
"are they witches?" mom asks
"yes, they are witches." Cheryl nods
"channel your mothers." mom says
i cringe
no!
"you guys are bitches and they are witches." Cheryl says
i start to laugh
"perfect." mom nods
"the only thing that i worry about is that there is seven of you and there's normally eight so i'm going to have to add another girl." Cheryl says
"from where?" Holly asks
"where?" mom pipes in
"please you guys let me just do my job, my job is to make these girls win..i'm telling you we will win with six not five it's not my fault Kendall isn't here." Cheryl says
"how are you going to decide the soloist?" Holly asks
"how i will decide?" Cheryl asks
"will the new person have the solo or are they just out of the picture?" Holly asks
"moms thank you very much you are a beautiful presence but i need you to leave." Cheryl says
"oh my god do they ever stop talking?" Kalani whispers
"if Abby was here i'd be kicked out by now." Nia whispers
"absolutely." i nod,
|Group Rehearsals|
we start learning the group and i really like it
lyrical is something we all know.
"you guys know Reagan right?" Cheryl comes in with the new girl
getting an odd sense of deja vu from Abbys countless of auditioning girls with us.
Reagan starts to learn the group dance with us
Cheryl explains the group to us and i think i'll do good
because i've been doing some ballet before i came back
we then have to lift Reagan up..but i can't because i'm like shorter..
"okay Camila and Evelyn, you guys can do your own thing over here." Cheryl says and she gives me and Eves a small turn sequence with an aerial back over to the other girls
Cheryl then calls in the moms
"okay so moms i just want you to know that Reagan definitely helps the group with the technique and her energy has made the girls work alot harder..i'm going to call your names and if you could step up that would be great um" Cheryl says
"Kalani so you are doing a solo and it's going to be called Out For Blood contemporary"
"Camryn you can step up you are also doing a solo, contemporary called Breaking Free"
"Camila you can step up you'll be doing a solo also contemporary called Haunted."
i smile
"the next solo i'm giving to Reagan it's a lyrical piece it's called The Ingenue."
"thank you" Reagan says
"i chose Reagan to do a solo because her technique is on pointe is all i care about this week guys is winning." Cheryl says
i nod
"but you're bringing Reagan in as a guest this week and you're going to give her a solo over Chloe, Nia, Eloise and Evelyn?" mom asks
mom, shut up.
"her technique is better." Cheryl states
"seriously?" mom asks
"seriously it is..did you not just see Reagan dance?" Cheryl asks
"oh i did, and you still chose her over my kids?" Elizabeth says
"i'm always in the back like i know i'm told time after time my technique is the worst in the group like i know that, but it's just hard because i've been here for legit seven years like i've never missed a competition i've put in so much." Nia starts
"you got the duet last week Kalani and Camila didn't." Cheryl says
don't bring me into it
"yeah but.." Nia starts
"that didn't win so we're trying new things i wanna win." Cheryl says
"it really sucks that we're dancing backup and we were the ones that put in our blood, sweat and tears for this" Chloe says
oh my god, everyone shut up she's gonna scream at us
"you guys my daughter just left her home studio that she's danced at since she was five." Reagans mom says
"that was your choice" Holly says
"that's how much we care about dancing with you guys" Reagans mom says
"she wants you guys to post a picture with her in social media so she can have more followers" mom says
"you guys lie and twist everything you want to say." Reagans mom says
"i don't think that's lying, i've seen it happen" Elizabeth says agreeing with my moms point
"stop! seriously not infront of your daughters it's ridiculous this is so childish! i've taken time out of my life to be here for your girls and i've grown to love them so much i really have but i know what it takes to win and if that means tough love then that's what it means i need you guys to please leave my room so i can work with the girls." Cheryl says
the moms then leave
and then they start screaming!
do they ever just shut up?!
i look to the floor
and the screaming continues..
i start to cover my ears
shut up, shut up, stop yelling
if you yell..we get it, then it's our faults
i don't want to be yelled at.
|Two Days To Competition|
new day, fresh start
i say that every day i'm on this show.
|Solo Rehearsals|
we start to learn my solo and it's to the song Haunted by Taylor Swift
it's a bit more difficult solo than i've had in a few years
"you have the routine down it's beautiful it's gorgeous..it's the emotion it's like you're so focused on getting it right that you can't have fun." Cheryl says
i nod
"put whatever emotion you are feeling into the dance because when you do it will be out of this world."
"okay." i say
i do the routine again and i try to add emotion
but not mess the routine up
"that looks better..well done that was beautiful!" Cheryl hugs me
"thank you." i smile
|One Day To Rehearsal|
anndddddd Kalani sprained her ankle!
Cheryl then tries to figure out what Kalani can and can't do
and Kalani lost her solo in the process,
but Evelyn gained one in the process
|Solo Rehearsal|
i do my solo and i think i'm doing much better than i did yesterday
"it's called haunted it's like you're haunted from the past and i do think you are..right?" Cheryl asks
i nod
"like what do you think?" Cheryl asks
"i um..yeah like sometimes when i dance still i hear correction after correction i used to get from her or things i've been told i guess." i shrug
"yeah..so use that i know that scares you i can tell but if you use the fear in your dance the routine will be spectacular because it's already amazing..it just needs that little push." Cheryl says
i nod
"great you were amazing." Cheryl hugs me
"thank you." i say
|Group Rehearsals|
we walk through the group for Kalani
"it just hurts to go on releve" Kalani says
"i don't want you to go on releve but if it even hurts to just walk on it then you should sit down." Cheryl says
"no i'll be fine." Kalani says
"no i need you to listen to me you need to be okay for nationals there's no way..can you just sit over there and pay attention to what we're saying." Cheryl says
we then reblock the routine without Kalani
Cheryl invites the moms in
"competition tomorrow i want to be first there's no other option but greatness..i love you guys" Cheryl hugs us
|Competition Day|
we arrive at the competition and im pretty nervous
i come out from the curtain with my solo costume on and it's gorgeous
camilas solo costume:
"oh my god Cami that's stunning." mom says
mom then helps me with my hair
"what a competition day this is for me." Kalani says
"shut up Kalani!" i joke
"all soloists even Kalani come up please." Cheryl says
i walk over to Cheryl
"so these were the original four soloists obviously Kalanis doing it now it really is between the four of you..Camryn i just really hope today you can step it up we need to throw all the negativity out..Camila same goes for you i need you to believe that you can do it..Evelyn, i know you can do it and i need to this that faith in yourself that you can go out there and win and Reagan this is your chance to prove to me why you should be part of this team because i still have a decision to make if i even want you here next week so there is alot of pressure listen to the music and let the talent take over and have a great time okay?" Cheryl says
we then head backstage
and i'm so nervous
Reagan enters first
and she was amazing
like really really good
Evelyn enters next
and her solo is entitled Tolerate It
it's a lyrical piece and she was phenomenal
"i'm so nervous." i whisper
"no you'll be fine..you'll do amazing." Kalani whispers
"good luck Cam" i hug Camryn
Camryn enters
and she was so good
like she was amazing
"i'm gonna forget this routine" i panic
"no you're not" Kalani says
"i am i feel like i am." i say
"you'll be amazing Cami" Evelyn says
"you're freaking yourself out..mark through it" Kalani says
i mark through my routine
turn..aerial....
aerial...
"is that it?" Kalani asks
i shake my head
"turn aerial.." i panic
i turn to see Camryn exit the stage
"i can't go on! i can't do it." i walk away from the wings
"Cami..breathe..you'll be fine you'll hear the music and it will all come back to you." Kalani says as she comes over to me
"i don't know it..i'm not ready." i say
"no you are" Kalani gives me hug
"welcome to the stage entry number 20 Haunted." the announcer says
i turn to Kalani and Evelyn in panic
i can't go on
i don't know the dance
i don't know what to do
"go! go!" Camryn tells me
i enter the stage and i put on a smile
my heart is racing..it's loud?
my music starts and i start my routine
i make sure to hit everything
we're getting closer and closer
feel the music..you're doing it.
i then do a tilt
that's not the choreography.
i get back in track and i finish the routine
what the hell did i just do?
i exit the stage and Camryn gives me a hug
"i just made a whole section up." i say as i start to cry
"what?" Kalani asks
"that wasn't the dance." i say
"woah hey no it's okay..you did amazing i didn't even know." Kalani says
"i just messed it all up" i stammer
breathe..in and out..
but i can't
"i didn't even notice that you changed it" Evelyn says
"no you didn't! you didn't run off stage, you didn't flinch you kept going you were a professional out there!" Camryn says
"but that wasn't the dance! i was meant to do the right dance and do it right and not mess it all up." i cry
"it doesn't matter you still did something! you'll still place!" Kalani says as she hands me water
"but she'll be mad at me." i whisper
"Cheryl? she won't yell she isn't Abby this isn't Abby" Kalani says
"i just ruined everything." i say as i wipe my face
"no you didn't." Camryn says
we start to walk back to the dressing room
and we see Chloe, Nia and Eloise
"not letting you in?" Camryn asks
"nope you guys had to be here." Nia says
"damn" Kalani says
"you okay?" Chloe asks me
"i forgot my dance..then i made it up" i say
"you forgot your dance?" Eloise asks
"i didn't notice?" Chloe says
"that's what we all said." Kalani adds
"but Cheryl did now i have to walk in there and hear the rant of i forgot it and i made it up and i won't win now." i say
"Cheryl isn't Abby she won't yell..will she mention it? obviously but she won't tell you that you're a disappointment" Nia says
im so scared
we walk into the dressing room and the moms cheer
Cheryl hugs Camryn and i make my great escape to mom
"what?" mom asks me
"i forgot it." i whisper
"you forgot it?" mom asks
i nod
"you kept dancing," mom says
"i made like a whole section up." i say
"oh Cami don't cry..it's okay it's a dance..you were beautiful" mom hugs me
"what's wrong?" Cheryl asks Camryn
"you killed it." Cheryl adds
"i just wished when i got offstage i liked how i performed like there's not been one time i've got off stage and it was good." Camryn says
relatable
"i tell you when you're great..Camille and Camryn come up here please." Cheryl says
Camryn and her mom go up to Cheryl
maybe i avoided it?
"you were really pretty Cam" Chloe says to me and she gives me a hug
"thanks..it wasn't my best..like at all" i shrug
"you still did really good." Chloe says
Cheryl gives a really nice talk to Camryn
"Cami." Cheryl directs to me
i feel like it chest just closed in
i look to Cheryl
"how do you feel about your performance?" Cheryl asks
"wasn't my best." i say
"come up here." Cheryl says
i hesitate and i walk up to Cheryl
"what happened?" Cheryl asks
"i forgot it" i say
don't yell..please
"i know, was it great that you forgot? no but you made something up and you made it work." Cheryl nods
i nod
"did you feel good that you didn't run offstage?" Cheryl asks
i shake my head
"you should..it's a brave thing to stay out there and finish your routine." Cheryl says
"i just was upset that i did forget and i was also upset that i made it up." i say as i blink away tears
"i'd rather you make it up than run off..don't cry!" Cheryl says and she hugs me
"hey it happens i know it's upsetting but that doesn't represent you as a dancer everyone has their off days alright?" Cheryl says
i nod
i then walk back to mom and Chloe and Chloe gives me a hug
"Evelyn, i thought you did amazing..your emotion was extraordinary" Cheryl says
"thank you" Evelyn beams
we then get ready for the group dance
we come out from the curtain and i love our costumes
we also then get threatened with our hoods!
"don't drop your hood Chlo." i whisper
"shut up" Chloe replies
i give her a innocent smiles
we then head backstage and i hope i don't mess this up
"ladies and gentlemen please welcome entry number 35 The Conven" the announcer says
we enter the stage and we get into our starting positions
we start the group and i make sure everything is perfect
the girls lift Reagan and i do my turns into my aerial with Evelyn
then i continue with the other girls
we finish the group and i think we nailed it
we exit the stage and i hug Kalani
|Awards|
"onto our overalls of the day" the announcer says
"starting with our top five soloist..fifth overall goes to number 15"
"fourth overall solo of the day goes to number 18 Ingenue"
i clap as Reagan gets her award
i haven't placed.
"third overall solo of the day goes to number 20 Haunted"
i smile as i get my award
that isn't bad, considering i forgot the routine
"second overall solo of the day this is number 19 Tolerate It."
i give Evelyn a smile as she comes up and gets her award
"and your top scoring solo of the day first overall goes to drumroll please..number 17 Breaking Free"
i give a huge smile to Camryn as she comes up to get her award
i give Camryn a hug before we sit back down
"moving onto our top three overall groups"
"our third overall group score of the day..number 33 Do Your Thing"
i squeeze Nias hand
"our second overall group of the day goes to..number 34 Bring Light"
i give Nia a huge smile
"and our first overall group of the day we have number 35 The Conven"
i cheer and i jump up
we all go up to get the award and i give Nia a huge hug
WE WON!
"what studio do we represent?"
"THE IRREPLACEABLES!" we cheer
we come back to the dressing room and the moms cheer
"you did so good!" mom hugs me
"seconds not the first to lose anymore or even third" i smile
"no it's isn't..you were amazing," mom hugs me
"i'm so happy you're here" Nia hugs Chloe
"Chloe dont cry..not a crying moment." i run over to them
"we won!" mom cheers
"we won!" Nia says
"okay i'm going to call you guys up and if you guys could come up" Cheryl says
we walk over to Cheryl
"you happy?" Cheryl asks
"yeah." we all smile
"you guys killed it from everything you guys were totally in it and something different to you weren't performing to the audience you guys just in your own bubble and that's something to take with you for next week's nationals..Camryn i'm so proud of you first overall solo" Cheryl says
we all cheer for Camryn
"i'm proud of you and i just want your attitude to please change i just want you to go out there not fighting and you looks defeated they would next give you first place."
"it's such an emotion rollercoaster you guys weren't used to you know a new person here you weren't used to Reagan being here you weren't used to Kalani sitting in silence being injured Kendall's not here so it made you, you had no choices but like you're in survival mode and this energy for nationals this is it this could be your final go you have no idea okay so you guys have to go out there and make it impressionable" Cheryl says
one more competition?
officially?
wow that's scary.