august
036. if i fix you will you hate me?
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THE CAR RIDE HOME WAS... awkward to say the least. Neither of them dared to talk about it. It probably would have been better if they even so much as uttered a word to one another that wasn't just "Turn the radio on/off" or "Do you want anything in the gas station?" But they didn't. Those twelve words were the only things they spoke the whole car ride.
Once they were parked beside their house, August locked the passengers side of the car, not allowing Jayden to get out.
They sat there in silence, staring out the windshield until August decided to speak up, "I don't want to 'save you''" Her voice was barely above a whisper as she tried to keep her voice as steady as it would go, "I don't want to fix you, either. I just- I thought I was doing the right thing. I thought by pushing you guys away and basically completely changing my whole personality that it would somehow make me feel better about everything. I didn't realise it was hurting you."
She turned her head around to face him, her lip quivering, "I don't want to lose you. I'm fine with losing everyone else, but I can't lose you, Jayden. I won't. Call me selfish. But I'm allowed to be."
Jayden stared at her before dropping his head, "Can I get out now?" He simply asked and August felt her heart break.
August didn't say a word as she unlocked the door and watched as he got out of the car. She stared after him as he disappeared inside.
LAST OCTOBER
INSTEAD OF GOING TO A PARTY ON HALLOWEEN LIKE SHE HAD PROMISED OLIVIA SHE WOULD DO, August decided to drive to Boston. She hadn't been to see Susannah much over the past few weeks, seeing as she was up to her eyeballs in work.
Before leaving the beach house, August had promised Susannah that she would visit as much as she could. And while she was, it wasn't as much as she wanted to. If she had it her way, she would visit all the time. But it wasn't up to her.
The second she parked in front of the Fisher home, she felt herself get giddy, she absolutely loved spending time with Susannah.
She quickly unbuckled her seat belt and reached over to the passenger's seat to grab the collection of DVD's she had stolen from her mom a few days prior.
Once she got out of the car and locked the door, she practically sprinted up the driveway. Standing outside the house, her giddiness only amplified. She pressed the doorbell and waited for the door to open.
Susannah stood in the doorway, a shocked look on her face, she wasn't expecting to see August. The girl smiled widely at her, holding up and fanning out the three movies in her hand. "I have halloween 1 through 3, the shining, and gremlins... I know it's really shitty but I loved it."
"What are you doing here?" Susannah asked, taking her by the hand and dragging her into the house.
"I told Olivia I'd go to a party, but I really didn't want to. I'd be happier here."
"No," Susannah scolded her, "You should be with your friends! It's halloween-"
"Fuck halloween!" She cut her off before placing her hands over her mouth, "Sorry."
"You're supposed to be with your friends and your brother - speaking of, promise me you'll take care of him, August."
August nodded without even thinking about it, without realising months later it would ruin her relationship with her brother, "Of course."
PRESENT TIME
HOURS AFTER GETTING BACK, August was snuggled into her bed in the dark. Every blind was shut and every light was off, the only bit of light that shone in the room was her phone screen. She had a random youtube video playing and that's what she had planned on doing for the rest of the day. Sitting in bed watching her phone, but when she got a FaceTime call from Steven Conklin, she knew her plans were soon going to end.
Very reluctantly, she accepted the call only to be met with him sitting in a room that was unusually bright, "What?"
"Hello to you too, my gorgeous friend." Steven smiled at her and it made her wanna throw up.
"Oh, good God, what do you want?" She sighed, knowing he wasn't ringing her just to talk. She lowered down the brightness of her phone and threw it on the pillow next to her as she turned onto her back and stared up at the ceiling.
Steven scoffed, "Can I not just call you?" He asked and the long silence must have been an answer because then he started to talk again, "Have you heard from Belly since last night."
"Only this morning when she told me what you done last night - Dick move by the way."
"I know... Did she tell you where she was?"
"No, I'm assuming if she's not with you she's with Taylor."
"She's not," The boy sighed, and August could hear the frustration in his voice.
"Then I don't know."
"Would Jayden know?" Steven asked, desperately.
August shrugged as if he could see her, he could only see the ceiling, "Nope. Well, I don't know. Probably not."
"I'll call him." And with that he hung up.
August must have stared up at the ceiling in her, now, completely dark room for ages, because when Steven called her back he sounded even more stressed.
"She's in cousins!" He practically yelled down the phone, making August jump.
"Wow... Why am I, like, not surprised."
A few seconds of silence passed before Steven spoke up again, "Me and Taylor are headed there now in a few minutes. I was wondering if you want to come to surprise them?"
"Them?" She asked, pushing herself up to shit against her headboard.
"Jeremiah, Conrad, You know, the whole gang."
"If I say no you'll just come collect Jayden and I won't you?"
Steven nodded, "Probably."
"Dickhead."
kianna speaks
la la le la la
next chapter is the cadden explanation chapter like what went down after the playground i love them sm it's actually not as dramatic as i was hoping but i can't do that
i will however make her a bitch to conrad because she feels betrayed... spoiler? idk
they will be happy this act kinda she'll still have a backbone and be like "yo no" but also like slowly start to trust him again (?) idk
me 🤝 idk