Nagising ako sa katok ni mom sa pintuan. "Do you have class today, anak?" she asked, her voice soft yet urgent. I blinked a few times, my grogginess dissipating as I realized the day had begun. Gusto ko pa sanang matulog pero nang mapagtanto kong maliwanag na sa labas ay mabilis akong bumalikwas sa higaan
I glanced at the clock, 7 am. Panic surged through me as I remembered my morning commitments. Not only did I have class, but I also had to assist Ma'am Vivien with painting a mask.
"Opo, I have class," I replied, my voice still thick with sleep. "I'll be downstairs in a bit after I take a quick shower."
I could practically hear her nodding through the door. "Alright, baby. Bilisan mo. Breakfast is ready."
"Yes maaa!" I replied, rubbing my eyes.
I rushed to the bathroom, my mind already racing through the tasks that lay ahead. The cold water jolted me awake, and I scrubbed away the remnants of sleep. After a few minutes of bath, tapos na ako at lumabas ng bathroom.
With my damp hair clinging to my skin, I dressed in a white t-shirt under a black hoodie, perfect for the chilly, overcast weather, and paired it with an oversized pair of pants that always seemed to give me a sense of comfort. Medyo cloudy kasi ang weather at parang uulan pa nga.
Moments later, I emerged from my room, feeling more awake and ready to face the day. I called to my mom, who was likely still in the kitchen.
Bumaba ako at nakita ang nakahain na pagkain sa table.
"Kumain ka na at baka ma-late ka ng pasok, malayo pa ang Silvestre anak," she replied, and her voice carrying reassurance.
"Thanks mom," I nodded to her. Paupo na ako nang may napansin akong mga papel sa kabilang table, madami pero naisip kong baka sa project lang ni dad.
Napansin ni mom ang pagtingin ko sa mga papel na nasa mesa kaya agad niya itong kinuha, "A-ah kumain ka na muna anak, ihahatid ko lang ʼto sa dad mo." May tuno ng takot at pagkabahala ang boses niya.
"Where's-
Hindi ko na natapos ang pagsasalita ko nang mabilis na lumabas si mom sa kitchen sabay pumunta sa kabilang hagdanan - sa kwarto nila ni dad. She's acting weird, papel lang naman ʼyon.
Kumain ako at hindi ko nalang pinansin ang kilos ni mom, pawis pa itong bumalik sa kitchen at pilit na ngumiti sakin.
"Ano po pala ʼyon, mom?" I inquired while eating bacon that my mom cooked.
"W-wala iyon anak... papel lang ng dad mo sa project niya." Mom answered, hesitantly.
Her actions is getting weird, really.
I attempted to dismiss her actions and carried on with my breakfast, but suddenly, a sharp, intense pain gripped my chest. It felt as though someone had thrust a knife into me, and a stifled groan escaped my lips.
"Ah!" I managed to utter, the pain overwhelming. Ang sakit, hindi ako makagalaw.
Concern etched across my mom's face as she asked, her voice laced with worry, "Freyja!?"
Nahihirapan akong huminga dahil sa sakit ng dibdib ko, "M-mom... It hurts," I replied, my voice strained. I instinctively placing a hand over my chest.
My mom's concern escalated, and she urgently called out for my father, her voice tinged with panic. "Anton! Anton! Your daughter!!" sigaw ni mom.
The pain persisted, refusing to subside. I found it difficult to move, my body growing increasingly unsteady. A sense of dizziness began to wash over me, further complicating the situation. Dad swiftly appeared, responding to my mom's call. Gently, he scooped me up and settled me onto the couch. Meanwhile, my mom rushed to fetch a glass of water, her movements marked by haste.
Hinawakan ni dad ang mukha ko, worriedly, "Sweetheart, hey hey?" he asked, her breath is heavier as he caress my face.
"Dad, my chest, it hurts..." I replied, still struggling to breath.
"I know, I know," he said. I can see the marbling water my dad holds in his eyes as he's assuring me. "Dad will do everything for my sweetheart, everything will be fine." He then hugged me.
I could see my mom crying by my side, silently. What is going on?
Ngayon ko lang naranasan ko since I was a kid. Wala akong nararamdamang sakit sa dibdib ko dati, ngayon lang.
"Anton." My mom weakly mumbles.
Napansin ko ang pagtingin ni dad kay mom. As if their talking with using their eyes.
They stayed by my side till the pain was gone. Nawala ang sakit sa dibdib but I can still see the worry painted in their faces.
"I'm okay, mom, dad." I replied, assuring them.
"Sweety, how about staying home for just a day muna?" Dad asked.
"I can't, dad. I still have things to do in school, I need to be present." I stated. Nakaupo lang kaming tatlo sa couch, me in the middle.
"Anak, you need to rest. Your father will take care of that." Mom said, holding my hand.
"I'm fine," sabay tingin ko sa kanilang dalawa. "I'll be fine besides that is just a random pain, nothing serious right?" I said, smiling at them reassuring that I'm fine.
Tumingin sila sa isa't isa bago tumungo sakin, they both sighed, "Yes baby." Sabay na sagot nila.
"I'll drive you school," dad said.
"Hindi na po kailangan dad, you need to rest. Look at your eyes, parang panda na." I chuckled. Napansin kong mejo hindi na siya nakakapagpahinga ng maayos simula nung dumating si Jaiza. Parang andami niyang dinadalang problema dati hindi naman siya ganito.
"Hayaan mo ʼyan. Basta para sayo, dad will do everything." He said, smiling. But his smile is kind of scared but full of reassurance.
He hugged me again, also mom. I suddenly feel comfortable with them hugging me. Felt like I'm still a baby for them.
"I'll go ahead, okay? I'm fine, at malaki na ako." I said. Ready to leave the house.
"Take care, baby!" Mom shouted.
"I'll fetch you after your class, hmm?" dad said, kissing my forehead.
"Yes dad, bye!" I said sabay pumasok sa kotse at pinaandar na ang makina. They're standing besides the gate as they sways their hands at me, bidding good byes.
While I headed towards SU, the memory of the sharp chest pain I experienced at home lingered in my thoughts. It was an unexpected and jarring moment. Strangely enough, it wasn't the usual heartache that occupied my mind, but a physical sensation of pain.
"I hope that doesn't happen again," I muttered to myself, gripping the steering wheel a little tighter.
Nakarating ako sa SU at dumiretso agad sa parking lot. Upon entering the building, nakita ko naman sila Ma'am Rhea and Sir Montejo unexpectedly. Together.
Another pain.
"Good morning, ma'am, sir." Bati ko sa kanilang dalawa nang nakalapit na sila sakin. I quickly moved my gaze away para hindi lang sila makita - fact that they're holding each other's hand.
"Are you gonna use the elevator, Miss Mercedez?" sambit ni Sir Montejo. Nasa paanan ng elevator kasi kaming tatlo, ako ʼyong nauna dito tapos sumunod sila.
Gamitin niyo nalang ang hagdanan please, kayo na ang mag-adjust okay? Nasasaktan ako.
"Yes sir," tipid na sagot ko. I can sense the stare she release. Tumingin siya sakin but her face remained neutral.
"Let's use the elevator together, right?" Sir Montejo inquired her.
Tanging tango lang ang sinukli ni Ma'am Rhea sa kanya. I smiled, awkwardly.
Bumukas na ang elevator at nauna silang pumasok sumunod ako. Magkatabi kami ni Ma'am Rhea and the guy is on the other side. Lumayo ako nang konti kay ma'am because I know, she don't want to see me anymore.
Siguro galit na galit na ʼto lalo na't sumabay ako sa kanila but duhh... who cares? Hindi naman sa kanya ang SU.
"I'll go," sabi ni Sir Montejo pagkabukas ng elevator sa second floor sabay lumabas at naiwan kami ni ma'am sa loob.
Super awkward ng situation, sobrang tahimik at parang multo lang kaming nakatayo sa loob na nag-aantay bumukas ulit ang elevator sa third floor.
Napansin kong may dala pala siyang book, maybe gagamitin niya mamaya sa pagtuturo niya. Hindi man lang dinala ni Montejo ang dala niya, napaka-ungentleman ng kumag na ʼyon.
After a few minutes of waiting, bumukas ang elevator and we're ready to get out. Napansin kong nahihirapan siyang bitbitin ang dala niya. I can't bear watching her struggling with that. Even though we are not in good terms, well since day one, I still want to treat her good as my professor.
"Ma'am? Ako na po ang magdadala." I said, offering my hand to take her books.
Kumunot ang noo niya at hindi ako pinansin saka lumabas bitbit pa rin ang dala niya. Hindi man lang siya nagsalita. Her icy and cold eyes penetrates me.
She don't really wants me to see.
Malungkot akong sumunod sa kanya, mabibigat ang hakbang na ginawa ko habang naglalakad patungo sa room. I just wanted to help lang naman. Kung iisipin niyang para magustuhan niya ako, nagkakamali siya. Gusto ko lang siya tulungan as her student. I already concealed my feelings for her, I'm matured enough to hide it. Though she rejected me more than hundreds.
Pumasok siya sa kabilang pintuan while pumasok ako sa nauang door. Tumingin sakin si Charlotte habang nakakunot ang noo at nagnakaw rin siya ng tingin kay Ma'am Rhea tapos tumingin ulit sakin. Ngumiti ako sa kanya at pumunta na sa table ko.
Nagsimula siyang magturo samin about various types of paintings, artist, and more concepts again. Her teaching is a tapestry of her position as a professor, concise, and clear.
Her alloted time spent, mabilis siyang lumabas ng room without dismissing us. Hindi ako mapakaling ganyan nalang siya palagi sakin, I'll try to talk to her later para linawin ang lahat that she will avoid being mad at me. Sumunod si Ma'am Suarez, nagulat akong siya ang pumasok supposedly si Mr. Saavedra kasi.
"Good morning, everyone," Ma'am Vivien's voice rang out as she surveyed the class. "I'll be substituting for Mr. Saavedra today as he's on leave. Her gaze briefly settled on me, her brows raising before transitioning into a concerned expression.
Galit ba siya?
I offered her a reassuring smile, knowing she left us in the university yesterday, unexpectedly.
"My teaching will last for just 15 minutes, and I'll be assigning homework. Please pass it to Mr. Saavedra next Monday, as we have an upcoming event this week," she announced with a firm tone. Her eyes met mine once more, a hint of worry dancing within them, subtly etched onto her features.
But why the concern?
Ma'am Vivien proceeded to teach, her pace notably quicker than before. Previously, her lectures had been more leisurely. Once her time was up, she distributed the assignment to the class.
Lumabas siya sa isang pintuan thinking she'll depart but lumiko siya sa kaliwa at pumasok sa pintuan na pinasukan ko kanina. Lumapit siya sakin.
"Frey, are you okay? You seem a bit pale," her voice was laced with concern.
"I'm... I'm fine, ma'am," I responded.
Pale? Kanina pa ba ako maputla? Hindi ko napansin.
"Let's head to the clinic or my office. You should rest there. Come on," she insisted.
"But..." I hesitated, unsure of how to respond.
"Don't worry. I'll write you an excuse letter. You're excused from class," she affirmed, her hand gently clasping my wrist as she helped me to my feet. Leading me towards the door, she opened it swiftly. "Careful," she cautioned.
I found myself compelled to follow her lead, despite my reservations. Iginiya niya ako papunta sa office niya sa second floor. Sumakay kami sa elevator at nakarating sa second floor. Still, she's guiding me.
Unexpectedly, nakasalubong namin si Ma'am Rhea. Kakalabas lang galing sa office ni Sir Montejo.
Sana all nag re-charge.
Tumingin lang ako nang saglitan sa kanya while pinanood niya kaming dumaan ni Ma'am Vivien sa harap niya. Hindi ko na nakita ang mukha niya dahil mabilis kaming nakatalikod sa kanya but I was sure na hindi tumunog ang boots niya indicating she's walking away but it seems like she's just standing there.
Not sure, I guess?
Nakarating kami sa labas ng office ni Ma'am Vivien tapos ay binuksan niya ulit ito para sakin, still guiding me to her office.
"Sit here. I'll give you a pillow and a comforter." Sabi ni Ma'am Vivien sabay paupo sakin sa couch niya. It's comfortable, really. She's treating me like someone special to her.
"Ma'am? Ano kasi nakakahiya," I said bago pa man siya makaalis para kumuha ng gamit.
"Don't be shy. I'm doing this for your own good, okay? I must take care of you." She answered, wearing her assuring smile. Kumuha agad siya ng kumot at comforter. She placed the pillow on the top of the couch at binigay sakin ang comforter.
"T-thank you, ma'am." I said, offering my gratitude.
"No problem. Lay down as I will get you medicine in the clinic. I will also tell the nurse about you so she'll give me the right medication for you." She stated.
Nakaramdam ako ng matinding hiya sa ginagawa niya sakin. I'm not her friend or something but the way she cares about me is just, nice.
"Stay here," she insist. Lumabas siya sa office at naiwan ako. Despite of situation, Ma'am Vivien never really ignored me.
Pero bakit sinabi niyang maputla ako? Am I that pale? Is there something wrong about me?
Bumangon ako mula sa pagkakahiga at tiningnan ang kamay ko kung totoong bang maputla ako. Hindi ko naman masabi kasi it seems normal for me. Tumayo ako para maghanap ng salamin at para tingnan ang mukha ko.
Tumungo ako sa desk ni Ma'am Vivien pero wala akong makitang salamin sa itaas nito kaya I tried to open her drawer. May nakita akong bilog na katamtaman na salamin kaya I immediately picked it, nang makuha ko na ay bungad sakin ang papel na nasa ilalim ng salamin. Natabunan yata. Binasa ko ang nakasulat roon.
San Isidro Hospital
Hospital?
Balak kong kunin at basahin kasi I'm curious but as soon as I touch it bumukas ang pintuan ng office. I thought nakabalik na si Ma'am Vivien but I was wrong.
"Ma'am?" I abruptly said. Kitang-kita ko kung paano siya pumasok sa pintuan at tumingin sakin. She didn't even uttered a word. Her cold eyes still bore on me.
What is she doing here?
"Ano pong ginagawa niyo dito?" I inquired. Hawak ko pa rin ang salamin but I was successful to close Ma'am Vivienʼs drawer. Lumayo ako ng konti sa desk ni ma'am.
Ma'am Rhea remained stationed by the door, her gaze fixed on me. Her silence felt like a judgment of my very existence.
After a few moments, she shifted her posture, gesturing she will leave the office. Irritated by her aloofness, I found the courage to stop her.
"Do you still hate me, ma'am?" I inquired. Her motion came to a halt.
"If this about my feelings for you," I continued, "I've concealed them."
Slowly, she turned to face me, her brows furrowing in confusion. "What are you implying?" Her voice held a tinge of coldness.
"I've already did everything you want. So why continue treating me this way?" My frustration seeped into my words, my fists involuntarily clenching.
"Miss Mercedez, I hope you're aware of the implications of your words. Cease this nonsensical talk," she responded, her tone icy.
"Do you hate me? Is your hatred for me so deep that you can't even stand to treat me right?" My voice quivered as my eyes welled up once again, tears threatening to cascade down my cheeks.
"I do despise you, yes. Not for who you are, but for your disruptive behavior that has only complicated my life further," she asserted. "Cease your childish antics, they're hardly befitting of your age."
So she truly hates me, huh?
Tears began streaming down my cheeks anew, a sensation of anguish gnawing at my chest. This time, however, the pain wasn't merely emotional - it was physical, a manifestation of her unexpected confession.
"When will you stop hating me?" I asked, tears blurring my vision and the pain in my chest intensifying.
"Ask yourself that question, Mercedez," she retorted before promptly exiting the office.
Naiwan akong mag-isa sa loob, ulit. I dissolved into tears, replaying her words in my mind. The ache in my chest grew, and in my anguish, I found myself punching my chest as the pain began to ache more. My tears flowed unabatedly.
I sat in the floor, crying miserably, still punching my chest. The paint won't even go away. Suddenly, the door opens again and there Ma'am Vivien saw me crying she hurriedly runs towards me and hugs me.
"What happened?" she asked, worriedly. Kitang-kita ang pag-aalala sa mukha nito. Hindi ako sumagot bagkos ay nagpatuloy ako sa pag-iyak at pag suntok ng dibdib ko. "Frey, stop. You're hurting yourself, stop." She said, sabay pigil sa kamay ko.
"M-Ma'am...masakit.." I said, pointing to my chest.
"Frey..hey, calm down.." She replied, holding my hand, para pigilan ako.
"M-masakit..." I confessed again.
"I know, sshhh sweetie...calm down. Stop crying." Sabay punas ng kamay niya sa mga luhang dumadaosdos sa mukha ko. She hugs me again and gently guided my body to stand up.
Nagpadala ako sa kanya habang hawak ko pa rin dibdib ko. "Careful, Frey." She assured. Masakit pa rin ang dibdib ko nang naupo na ako ulit sa couch. She managed to stop me from crying.
"I bought you medicine, take it so the pain will go away." Ma'am Vivien stated. Mabilis siyang tumayo at kumuha ng baso at tubig pagkatapos binuksan niya ang pakiti ng gamot at pinainom sakin. "Here," utos niya.
Hindi ko alam kung paano ko siya pasalamatan sa ginagawa niya sakin. I don't know why she's being this kind to me.
"Ma'am, why are you so kind to me?" tanong ko sa kanya. Nakaupo siya sa tabi ko while patting my back after I took the medicine. Humihingos pa rin ako dahil sa pag-iyak ko kanina.
"Ssshhh.." She replied. "Just lay down and rest. I'll call your father to fetch you here." She said reassuring me.
Hindi na ako nagsalita pa at nakaramdam ako ng pagod. Nawala na rin agad ang sakit ng dibdib ko. Humiga ako sa couch kahit nasa paanan ko lang si Ma'am Vivien. Siguro napagod ako sa pag-iyak sa wala naman sigurong makabuluhang bagay. I gently shuts my eyes, naramdaman ko ang kamay ni Ma'am Vivien na inayos ang comforter sa katawan ko at nawalan na ako ng lakas para maging gising pa.
Nagising akong chinecheck ng doctor, sa couch ni Ma'am Vivien. Inikot ko ang paningin ko at nakita ko sila Mom, Dad, at Ma'am Vivien looking at me, and a worry painted on their faces.
"You're awake," agad na lumuhod si dad sa baba ng couch to check me.
"D-dad?" I squint my eyes.
"Freyja... anak." Mom weakly mumbled again. It's obvious na kakagaling lang niyang umiyak.
"She's fine now, her pulse are stable, no need to worry." The doctor said.
Pulse? Stable?
"W-what... h-how is she? I-is my daughter alright, doc? my dad asked.
"Indeed, Mr. Mercedez. Your daughter requires some rest, and it's essential for her to manage her emotions, as they could potentially trigger the condition in her heart that's causing the pain," the doctor explained.
What? May sakit ba ako sa puso?
What is the meaning of this?
"Dad? Mom? What's the meaning of this?" I asked. Umupo ako at hinilot ang sentido ko.
"Nothing, sweetie. Everything is fine." Dad assured me.
"That doesn't matter, what important is you're fine, baby." Mom added.
"The doctor just checked you, Frey. That's it. We told the doctor that you've been experiencing chest pain." Ma'am Vivien assured.
I glance at Ma'am Vivien and she seems like telling the truth to me somehow, she manages to calm me.
My parents discreetly escorted me along a hidden path of the school, ensuring we avoided other students sight. Ma'am Vivien led the way, guiding us until we reached the school's secret parking lot.
"Don't worry about helping me, alright? We'll wrap things up quickly, Frey, just rest," Ma'am Vivien reassured me.
With their assistance, I settled into my father's car. Ma'am Vivien gave me a warm smile and waved goodbye. I returned the gesture, softly saying "thank you."
Her smile lingered.
On our way home, I couldn't quite grasp the full significance of what the doctor had said.
Pulse? Heart?
-
Note: Sorry for hurting y'all,
don't hate Miss Rhea that much.
Let's wait for her pov.
Lovelots.🌱