Tiptoeing around the hotel room, Ben walked on eggshells as he searched for Nino. The air in the city had changed. It was thicker, more difficult to maneuver. It felt like there was a monster around every corner and at any moment, they would attack Ben. He didn't sleep last night. He just tossed and turned and sat on the balcony for hours. He didn't recognize this city anymore. It wasn't a haven from his past anymore. It wasn't a place he knew front to back. There was so much he didn't understand. He was a little country mouse who couldn't make it in the big city.
"Good morning," Evie whispered, and Ben jumped, sucking in a sharp gasp that almost broke his ribs. He put his hand over his chest, willing it to calm down.
"Morning," Ben huffed out, glancing at Evie sitting at the counter dividing the living room and kitchen. "How'd you sleep?"
Rubbing her eyes, Evie grumbled, "Fine. You walked around a lot."
"I did. Sorry," Ben said as he realized that Evie's braid had fallen out and she was still in her pajamas. He also realized that she was usually ready by the time he woke up. It must've been Nino helping her all this time.
"Hey," Ben said. "I'm not sure what Nino is doing today, but I think we should stay here while I try to figure out what we should do next." He didn't say he really wanted to wait for Nino to come back. Ben didn't love feeling this way, feeling this dependent on another person. Everything about growing up was hard. Nino made everything easy. Too easy. Now, Ben had to live with the ramifications of being spoiled by that man.
Sighing, Ben went for his phone that wasn't there as Evie asked, "Can we explore the hotel?"
"I don't know..." A realization dawned on Ben, and he tried walking subtly to the fridge like he was searching for anything specific like food or bags of blood or anything like that. The fridge, of course, was empty. "At least today. Let's stay inside."
Evie groaned, but she didn't argue. It sucked, but she understood the stakes. Closing the fridge door, Ben leaned against it and peered at Evie. "When's the last time you fed?"
"It was from you."
Calculating the hours and minutes, Ben's anxiety carved holes in his stomach. His blood should last longer than any other human and yet, Ben knew, Evie refused to drink much. Ben asked, "And you're still good? Or are you hungry?"
Evie shook her head. "No, I'm not hungry."
"You'd tell me if you were hungry, right?"
Evie nodded.
"Promise?" Ben offered his pinky.
"Promise." She leaned over the counter, locking her pinky around his.
"Okay," Ben said, clapping his hands together. He sauntered around the counter and lunged for the little girl. "Let's go back to bed!" she screamed with joy as Ben scooped her up, running back to her bedroom with her as Ben tried to distract her and, more so, himself.
***
"Hunger check."
Ben shot Evie with a finger gun, trying to keep it light. She wasn't allowed to know there was a problem. It was his job to take care of her. Not the other way around. She needed to think everything was normal. They were both sitting on the bed with Ben by the nightstand, punching in Lincoln's cell phone number. Evie bounced up and down, making the mattress squeak and cry. She shook her head and kept jumping. "Not hungry."
She got to her feet and jumped hard enough to touch the ceiling. This little girl was getting restless, but after almost a week stuck inside, Ben couldn't blame her. He was going a little crazy, too. And as much as he loved Evie, Ben knew if she was lying, she'd wait until the very last minute to fess up.
Ben jumped up and caught her before he was flung off the side. "Go watch something in the living room," he instructed, setting her down and pointing at the bedroom door.
She huffed and sped into the next room. Ben collapsed onto the bed and focused on his breathing instead of letting a vein pop out of his forehead. He wasn't sure how much longer he was going to keep this together. Ben sat back up and tried the phone again.
He called Lincoln and his voice sounded like a chorus of angels. "Hello? Thank you for calling Joe's Pizza. What can we get started for you?"
"It's Ben, Lincoln. Joe's Pizza?" Ben echoed. "Are you serious?"
"I'm not taking any chances."
Ben flopped onto the bed again. "I might lose my mind."
"I could have told you that."
"We're getting restless. Evie might start gnawing on the walls."
"I heard that!" She appeared again, holding onto the door frame and the knob as she swung back and forth. Stricken, she seemed sick with boredom. He watched life fade from her eyes.
"Sorry, kid," Ben said, but turned to Lincoln to ask, "What do I do?"
"How should I know?" Lincoln guffawed. "I don't even watch my sister's kids—oh, hey," Lincoln cut himself off, moving the phone away, but Ben could still hear him say, "I'm just talking to Ben."
"Is that Freddie? Ask him if he'll hang out with us!"
"It's not Freddie, it's Tim."
"Tim's there?"
"We were just having lunch."
Ben could hear Tim ask, "Is anything wrong?"
"We're fine!" Ben raised his voice, panic shooting through him. Rustling could be heard on the other end as Tim took the phone from Lincoln, causing Ben to almost roll off the bed. "I can't promise I'll be super exciting, but I probably won't be as boring."
"Hi Tim!" Ben struggled to be normal and said, "Oh, I'm just complaining and being dramatic. Just ignore me."
"But you have something to complain about," Tim pointed out. "It's just one night. Let me take you out."
"I don't know. I mean..." Ben looked around, but he was still all alone and the silence staring back at him was suddenly worse than a few minutes ago. "It's just me watching Evie right now."
"Bring her! I'll take you both out."
"I'm not sure—" Evie cut Ben off, throwing the door open. In a blink, Evie was standing behind Ben on the bed. She easily swiped the phone away.
"Evie!" Ben called.
"Hello? Who is this?" she asked, and Ben could sort of make out Tim introducing himself. Ben reached for the phone, but Evie narrowly avoided him by flying across the room. "Where will we be going on our date?"
She nodded as Tim spoke on the other end. "Are you paying for this date, or shall I bring my purse?"
Ben could hear Tim's laugh from across the room and Ben scrambled off the bed, chasing after this girl and she just shot into the living room. "Evie, cut it out. We really shouldn't."
Knowing he'd never catch up, Evie's voice didn't waver as she asked, "And when should we be ready?"
"Evie!" Ben snapped again, with the coach sitting in between them.
Looking Ben dead in the eye, Evie didn't hesitate to say, "Okay. We'll meet you in the hotel's lobby. Dress nice." She hung up and Ben crossed his arms, staring down the little girl who showed zero remorse and planned to never regret it.
"What was that?" Ben asked. "You know we can't just go out like that."
Evie took a deep breath, steadying herself as she rolled her shoulders back. "If you don't let me get out of this hotel, I'm going to lose it. I need this." She said it like her life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness was at stake. "And you don't have to worry. I'll protect you."
"Evie, I don't want to put you in a situation where you have to protect me."
She shook her head. "It'll be fine. Just one night. Please?" And just like that, her brown eyes doubled in size and her little lip pursed in a serious pout. Ben's heart wept. She never asked for anything. This was her first and only ask of him.
Ben sighed, dropping his hands. "We'll go out for a few hours and that's it."
Evie's face exploded in a smile. In a blur, she ran around the couch and threw her arms around Ben, jumping up and down. "Thank you! Thank you!"
"You're welcome," Ben's voice wavered as she shook him. She patted her head, softly laughing to himself. "Thank you for talking to me." He grabbed her face, squishing her cheeks together until she looked like a fish. "Keep it coming, kid, even if you think we'll disagree. Your voice matters." Fighting his hold, Evie smiled in the goofiest way possible and ran off to her room.
"Dress nice!" She repeated and slammed the door behind her.
Ben dragged himself back to his room, leaning against his door. He checked his burner phone again and with no new messages, Ben sighed. Every day, this room lost more light and grew colder and colder. Maybe it was pathetic on Ben's part, but if Nino walked through that front door, Ben would forgive him immediately.
Ben worked so hard to stay by Nino's side... failure was a difficult pill to swallow. The regret was stuck inside his dried thoughts, and he couldn't get it down. Ben was going to die choking on it.
***
By Evie's standards, Ben didn't dress nicely enough, so she picked out a light gray ribbed polo that Ben forgot he even had and his black slacks. She also demanded a belt and his nicest black dress shoes. He wouldn't admit it, but Ben packed this stuff on the off chance he'd go on a date with Nino. The irony tasted like garbage soured in the sun.
Evie chose a light pink dress with a huge ruffle for the collar and sleeves. Ben helped style her hair half up and she wore her pearl bracelet for the occasion. They waited in the lobby, but Evie couldn't sit down, rolling her bracelet round and round her wrist.
"We're just going to dinner," Ben told her, trying to comfort her before all her worries made her burst at the seams. "We'll talk, eat, and walk through the city. It'll be fun."
"I'm nervous around new people."
Ben nodded. "I understand, but Tim is super nice. You're going to like him immediately."
"And what about me? Will he like me?"
"Of course!" Ben grabbed her hand, shaking her hand. "You're the coolest! Let's just take a deep breath." They took a deep breath together and let it rattle out at the same time. When he smiled, she mirrored it.
"Hello? Is that Ben?"
Ben and Evie turned at once as Tim approached the back of the couch, leaning against and smiling at them. "Wow. I almost didn't recognize you. You look great."
"Oh, uh, hey!" Ben's voice cracked, surprised to see Tim, and especially surprised to see him dress as nicely as Evie requested. He even wore his contacts tonight and styled his brown hair back like prince charming.
"Tim," Ben said and motioned to Evie. "This is Evelyn, Nino's niece."
Tim walked around, offering Evie his hand. "Hello, it's nice to meet you. I like your dress. It's a pretty color."
"Nice to meet you, too. You may call me Evie," she said, her voice soft and still a little nervous. She kept glancing at Ben as if she was in the middle of doing something wrong. "Thank you for taking us out."
Tim's smile grew wider. "You're very welcome." Standing up tall, Tim's hand so naturally found the small of Ben's back. "Are you both ready to go? I've got a taxi outside."
"Let's go," Ben said and took Evie's hand. They followed Tim outside, climbing into the car behind him. He pressed into Tim's side, letting Evie inside, and Ben smiled awkwardly, feeling his face warm up. Their eyes locked and when Tim smiled, Ben felt a little more at ease. They didn't go far to an Italian restaurant, where the hostess warned them, "We don't have a kid's menu."
Ben laughed. "She has better manners than I do. She'll find something, I promise."
She sat them in a corner booth and Evie didn't stop smiling once, her big doe eyes looking at everything and everyone. Tim asked her about her interests, her family, and how the summer was going. She was more than happy to answer every little question. Tim showed off how he can turn a napkin into a swan. Meanwhile, the storm Ben had been wading finally settled. All the natural disasters and fires and panic and sirens all stilled at once and Ben could finally relax. He could've watched Tim and Evie all night.
When Tim stepped away to the bathroom, Evie tugged on Ben's sleeve and motioned him closer. Ben leaned down as she cupped her hand around his ear and whispered, "I'm hungry."
Ben reeled back, checking her eyes. Still brown, but maybe lighter. Or his mind was playing tricks on him. Ben whispered, "Really?"
She nodded.
"Okay..." Ben said, glancing around as he ran through every idea and thought, but the only time he remembered having enough blood for her was back home. That would have to be the solution. Grab some blood from the brownstone and then hurry back to the hotel.
Arriving back at the table, Tim could probably feel the shift in the air. "Is everything alright?"
Putting on a smile, Ben touched Tim's arm and assured him, "Everything's fine. I think Evie's just getting tired."
Unbothered, Tim smiled. "Alright, I'll get the check."
Every interaction, every conversation, was just so easy. Ben knew it would not be a long conversation. He did just as he promised, paid for the meal, and got them a taxi. "Back at the hotel?" He asked.
"Oh, uh no. We're going back to my apartment."
"You got it," Tim said, another easy change of plans. Everything he did, he just went with the flow and when they arrived at Brownstone, Tim helped everyone out of the car. His hand lingered inside of Ben's and Ben looked down at the touch, willing himself to feel... anything. He waited for the warmth in Tim's hand to grow and spark, but nothing happened. Nothing bad. Nothing good. Nothing, and Ben hated himself for it.
He let Tim's hand go and tapped Evie's shoulder, handing her his eyes. "Hey, go ahead inside. I'm going to talk to Tim for a second."
"Okay." She nodded and waved to Tim. "Goodbye, Tim! Thank you!"
"You're welcome." Tim softly laughed.
Ben waited for her to fully be inside before turning to Tim. Nighttime on this beautiful street, dressed like that, Tim looked like the protagonist of a romantic comedy. Like the Hallmark logo should be stuck to the corner and Ben was going to learn the true meaning of love, friendship, and Christmas.
"Thank you for tonight," Ben said. "You were great with her. She—we really needed this. Honestly, it was a breath of fresh air."
"I do aim to please."
"And I'm sorry about the club. I should've said goodbye to you before I left, but Nino was ready to go and I—"
Tim took a step, closing the space between them and holding Ben's face. Bringing Ben into a kiss, Tim lingered against his lips and took a small breath. He moved back, but didn't let go and despite his smile, Tim's eyes were in a haze of melancholy. "You're so great."
Ben's chest clenched. He's had a speech like this before from a different man that now felt like a thousand years ago. With a chuckle, Tim dropped his hands on Ben's shoulders. "It's actually a little annoying how great you are. Funny, sweet, and so handsome. It's actually not fair that you got all of that. You need more flaws. I think you should stop showering every day or eat raw onions. That would make this kind of thing hurt less."
Focusing on his breathing, Ben didn't know what to say. He just studied the lines of Tim's face and waited for the final nail in the coffin.
"Whenever I see you, I get butterflies," Tim said and Ben wondered if all the time they spent together was somewhat cruel if it should've ended a long time ago. "And I'd like my partner to feel that way about me. I want someone to look at me, the way you look at Nino."
Flushed, Ben straightened and grappled to find the right words. Not another lie, but something that would make this less painful. "Tim, I don't, um..." He sighed. "Tim, I do like you."
Tim scrunched his nose. "Don't."
"But I do."
"Not as much as him, right?"
Ben dropped his head, using so much strength to look Tim in the eyes again. "Right."
Sighing, Tim nodded and slipped his hands into his pockets. "Right..." Slowly, he started walking away. "I'll see you around, Ben."
"See you around."
With one last smile, Tim nodded, but his eyes flickered past Ben's head and he nodded again. Confused, Ben flipped around and, standing in the middle of the sidewalk in the same clothes as a week ago, there was Nino Ventura.