I thought persuading myself to get up and fill myself with the energy and buoyancy everyone else was having and encouraging me for that passed me as I sat down in a plastic chair knowing my butt wasn't about to do anything special.
The family was having a good time, chatting among each other and sharing stories that left one rolling on the floor. I sat in my seat sipping punch and wishfully hoping Beau found me. Yet, I couldn't be too selfish if he was having a good time wherever he was, still disappointed he came today as a surprise.
Mama, my grandmother, wanted all of us to sit in a circle outside her backyard - which happened to be huge compared to the house - sitting side by side till it was difficult to see who was across from you from a distance. She still had some youth in her with a couple of wrinkles near her eyes and mouth to accentuate her wisdom and womanhood. Everyone kept their eyes on her and drowned in her beauty.
Different complexions, sizes, and heights sat around in an irregular circle. Others stood up, wrapped arms around another with smiles pasted on their faces. It was nice to see how different we carry ourselves as one big family.
"Today, I know today, y'all are tired..." she shook her head at a woman pretending to wipe sweat off her forehead, "the plethora of greetings and hellos shared, the people may have never seen in your life to the people you have grown up with since childhood."
A couple of nods and mumbled approvals went around in agreement.
"Now it's time to have some fun, shut up and dance 'cause I've got something for you."
Hooting and hollering created an uproar and she pulled up my grandpa as a steady song played from the music box. The stood in the middle of the circle and started getting down like never before.
Turns went around, between couples and friends with drinks in hand, even Simone and her boyfriend who happened to show up, Malik, danced.
She wasn't that good in my opinion.
I was forced to get up and dance which I found no pleasure of doing because of the immediate pressure and attention from others. One of the guys that sat by me told me to get up and I hid my face in my hands, laughing. His sister clapped and encouraged me to get up as well then Mama screamed my name over and over as her friends followed along.
"C'mon dancer! Show us some moves!"
I followed the guy and we took slow dancing steps in the middle on the grass with people watching at every angle. I backed up on my own and rolled my hips to the sound of the speakers and everyone cheered with a rush of excitement. He grabbed my hand to twirl me around twice. The world was a blur and their eyes, lips, and facial expressions mixed into whole till it landed on one. The spinning was over and his body rested back in the seat comfortably with a vacant look. Our eyes locked and I barely was barely able to catch the small smile he shown till the guy turned me away from him. I think I smiled back.
After it ended, a herd of people moved to the long white rectangular tables covered with plastic cloths and yellow lanterned lights. It was getting pretty late which didn't stop the family from eating at all.
Jewelz said her good-byes so she could put the kids to bed and we were all assigned tables to eat depending on our ages. The adults sat with adults, and kids sat with their mothers. Sadly, I had to sit across from Simone.
Directly from her stuck up self.
Seats were taken place, but Simone waited held a white clutch to her chest and batted her eyes impatiently, waiting for Malik to pull out her seat in an act of chivalry.
"Thank you baby." She piped up so the whole table can hear and of course we did.
Me, I just didn't care.
Beau sat in the seat at the same time I plopped in my mine and my nerves started tingling, I froze. It was difficult to be put at ease with him by my side. His shoulder accidentally brushed against me and I felt the heat from his skin radiate over to me.
"Mary, you want to pray? Mary wants to pray. I'd like to give blessing before we eat. Let's hold hands and bow our heads." Mama yelled, trying to hush the group.
My head bowed and my eyes fluttered shut, and I reached out my hand to one side but didn't grab Beau's.
I felt a warm hand glided into my palm smoothly on the edge of the chair.
"Father God, I'd like to thank my friends...family...and new people for coming out tonight..."
Beau's hand began encircling his thumb on my hand, caressing it gently and my eyes flickered open to turn my head to capture a smirk that touched his lips as he stood still in the prayer posture. I quickly closed my eyes and looked away.
"Amen."
"Amen." Everyone else said in unison.
As the speech ended and conversations amplified, everyone started their own filled with gossip and chitchat became difficult to talk over.
My arms reached over to grab some of the fresh doughy bread and dipped it in a mix of oils each plate had eagerly.
"Can you pass me the okra?"
I was praying, maybe even hoping, not to talk to her throughout the night we had left together, but shouldn't have taken a second thought. Searching the table, I should've known, the green okra settled in the white bowl next to my oils and delicious bread. My eyes averted at the okra, then my glass and picked the one I liked best.
"Ebonee."
Her face was probed with annoyance and animosity as she said my name with a sharpness, but she surprisingly remained calm.
I was glad this was pissing her off actually.
"Oh, yes?" I asked reluctantly.
She fixated herself in the plastic chair and brushed off the napkin by her hand on the table along with my cluelessness I solemnly faked till it was sprawled out flat.
She cleared her throat appropriately and looked down to address me in a biting manner.
"You did very well dancing up there Ebonee. It was almost cute."
"It could've been better since you're a dancer and all, danced at least a few years and counting by now." She twirled the fork in her smooth hand, "I expected more."
She just loved to dig the knife in and jeer it in my skin.
"I don't recall what you were doing dancing," I said.
Beau snorted quietly, but it was loud enough for Simone to catch it and hear.
"I wouldn't be the one laughing if I were the one dating ebony the black girl now. Why the need to have the color black as your name? Hell, we know you're black."
She knew I always said that as a joke, just to be a tease, but when she said it, it was, in fact, humorless.
My fork slipped out of my fingers but not because I was angry, ( I sometimes had horrible reflexes) no, because what came out of Beau's mouth next.
"What? We're not even-"
I cut him off quickly, "Are you kidding me?"
"Don't get mad now sweetie, you don't want to be that one loud ghetto black girl screaming across the table." She dabbed the napkin on her stained lips and the corner of her mouth delicately so it wouldn't smudge.
I pushed my seat back till a relaxed hand rested on my bare thigh and a soothing voice whispered, "Ebonee." The heat from his skin cooled the temper a little I was tempted to lash out.
"And right now, I don't think you want to get punched." I calmly threatened.
"Ebonee. Don't."
Heads from the table surrounded the scene turned to tune in on the commotion.
"Listen to your boyfriend and calm down, damn," she looked at Malik in consent, "I swear she's acting like a dog. Beau's ex-girlfriend was better than that. Beau, you're better than that. It's a shame Beau would lower himself to such black-trash pity."
The tears were ready to come. Ready to just roll down my cheeks and my legs willing to sprint away from this mess I never caused and or attempted to make in the first place. I slowly stood up and stared down at my rice, the food I left untouched.
"Well, I never was brave enough to start things, but I always wondered what it was like to be..."
My hands picked up her plate and smothered all the contents on her pretty little white outfit. "In a food fight." I added. She latched onto my forearms, stirring a confusion in my eyes since I should be the one taking control, and I grabbed her too as I dug my nails in her poreless skin.
"You idiot, let...go of me! What is wrong with you!?" Simone screamed.
The table shifted underneath me and I almost thought it would tumble on over her till air cut out my lungs and a short gasp escaped from my throat as I was being pulled away.
"Fuck you Ebonee!" Simone wailed and Malik was by her side, rubbing her arms reassuringly for a sense of comfort after our brawl.
This time I didn't run away. I didn't leave. I stayed in my position and held up both my middle fingers to indicate the same as I was being yanked away once more. A few mothers and elders gasped at my gesture and a pair of different hands were now digging into the flesh of my own skin, replaying the same thing I did to Simone.A few tugs left my feet to stagger, but I was able to keep up.
At least I didn't run away from the situation this time, two pats for me.
I saw the person that whisked me away, the once happy women now was beginning to leave a purple bruise as her grip tightened. She dragged me out of sight, away from everyone and everything under the oak tree by the lamppost light.
"What are you doing?" Mama shouted.
"I was-"
"What were you trying to accomplish? You have my attention, so what is it?"
I would've cried and whined when trouble found me and consequences followed at this time. No matter how many times I would try to explain, Mama would've assumed it was another excuse added to my list and willing to not take my side on things.
Just like old times.
I pushed back the hair strands that began to fall over my face, "I'm sorry for-for blowing up like that. It was disrespectful to you, the family, it was out of control on my part." And lowered my eyes.
So I took the blame and apologized like those old times.
Mama didn't want to accept my apology, her head cocked to the side, but thankfully she sighed.
"You're just like your Mom."
I was nothing like her. I didn't avoid calling my child to see how she was holding up in a rich couple's house, being looked after by young adults. I didn't point out my kid was fat indirectly, I didn't having a separated husband living a better life than me, not wanting to say it aloud.
"I hope not," I muttered.
"You are," she nodded, "act like her too."
The crickets chimed in a harmonious tune and the night air was breathlessly hot and too soon for the stars to peek out in the dimmed sky.
"I'm disappointed in you Ebonee. Especially you. You'll have to leave and Simone too because others aren't too happy about what both of you girls did tonight."
I acknowledged the consequence of being kicked out of her house for the night and kept my eyes on the grass that engulfed my feet.
"But, I'm having another gathering. It'll be smaller this time so you and Jewelz better come visit. I have to talk to you."
I lifted my head to see if she was serious and a soft smile was good enough to know. For one time in my life, I just wanted to be out here alone and hug my grandmother for dear life, sobbing in her arms.
_____________________________________________
We said our farewells without saying anything to the rest of the family and I happened to get ride in Beau's car on my way to the house before Simone.
He said he'll be back so he could talk to Simone where their car was parked, leaving me in the car alone. A phone buzzed in the cup holder between the seats and the light illuminated the phone screen.
I didn't mean to look over, I thought it was my phone, but the urge to look was killing me. A name I could hardly pronounce stated the caller and a text with a complicated message in a foreign language then English followed after:
2 gone and a dead man walking. You were wrong Beau, I have till midnight.
I squinted my eyes closer to the screen to understand the other part. Since my brain only registered the gibberish, I was about to reread the English sentence till a figure got in the driver's side and I jumped, drawing in a sharp breath.
"You okay?" Beau asked with concern in his mismatched eyes.
I quickly nodded and looked out the window, the text floating in my head. What does that even mean? How can people be gone and a walking- this is just some Criminal Minds and CSI: Miami mess I don't want to know. It probably could've been a video game. Guys play that too and kill players off all the time. I tried to get rid of the unsettled churn in my stomach.
It was too hot to have the windows up, so most of them rolled down and the sunroof blew wind down our hair. The ride didn't have to be quiet if Beau said something because I was mixed with fuming and upset about the situation. From Beau coming out her today to meet my relatives to Simone making me lash out on her.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Beau shouted over the gush of wind.
I looked over at him, "Tell you..."
"You and Simone were related," He rolled up the windows a little, "That you guys were cousins and you were staying at her house for a few months."
I fixed my position in my seat, "Why didn't you tell me you knew Simone?"
"You never asked."
I scoffed. I can't believe him. He expected me to ask him how I knew someone, let alone, my cousin of all people. Why would I want to bring up my ridiculous cousin anyway?
"Why would I ask you such a silly question? W-why did Simone want to bring you?"
"Because she said anyone could come, and you never told me so I guess I showed up." He said.
I couldn't tell if he was hurt or angry about me not mentioning it to him. His eyes stayed glued to the road and a hand rested in his lap.
"But it's a family thing, it wasn't even like that with us, but it's funny how she invites you last minute."
"Why."
I shook my head without searching for an explanation for him. "Simone would pull something like that."
"What else haven't you told me about?" Despite the fact, two people were dead from the text message.
"About me? Well, I'm from Greece." He said. It sounded more like a question than a factual statement.
I shook my head for a second time, confirming I knew nothing about him. But gosh, I wanted to, yet so far it's just been an easy ride between both of us and it wasn't making the loops and dives I expected. It also explains the dark hair and eyes and the accent. His nice accent. From the conversations, he sternly encounters on the phone sometimes, at least from my guesses he's not from Spain or Russian, but Greek. Wow, Ebonee, it took a few days almost past a week to figure that one out.
Overall, I was disappointed how the day turned out and all the energy I claimed I never had seemed to drain out of me right now, leaving me fatigued. I'm mad Simone made me look like a fool. I allowed her to make me look like a fool. Instead of the relatives talking about my family I guess tonight the shower and bedtime couple talk will be spotlighted on me.I heavily sighed hoping Beau didn't hear it so he wouldn't think it was him, but my fault.
Talk was short and by the time he rolled up at the black gate, I made my way towards the house so I wouldn't make things more weird and awkward than it already was. I just needed to be alone for a minute.
I swore Beau called out Ebonee but it was too late because the car door shut out my name.
____________________________________________________
You guys are probably like yayy, this is shorter, lol. This was like a part 2 actually. Have a good day ladies (or guys, I wonder if a guy is reading this) and have a good night or day! Vote, Comment, Share, etc., all the good stuff!