This is not the update you wanted but I'll make this quick. I am a teenager that has a broken family. I'm pretty sure you've seen many broken families but listen to mine.
My Father had a child with another woman before my mother. They seperated as my father wasn't ready for children yet but stayed friends with the lady. The child they had was a girl and she is considered my half-sister.
A few years later my father met my mother and had me. My father said that my mother blackmailed or threatened to abort me if he doesn't marry her. I'm not sure if that's true and I'm still skeptical about it.
2 years after I was born-my younger sister was born too. The next few years of my life were what I considered normal with no fights and such. However the no fighting thing didn't last for long. My parents are the type to not have any nicknames for each other. They don't call each other 'Love' or even 'Babe' My parents ended up fighting about something really seriously.
If I had to guess it would be about money, me and my younger sister, they would fight so often that me and my sister got used to it, but one day a fight got so out of hand me and my sister had to physically seperate my parents.
My mother couldn't take it and left with me and my sister, leaving my father alone. We stayed with our cousins for a while before we went back to my father. We were happy again for awhile but it didn't last long until another big fight happened.
My mother left with us again but this time we stayed in an apartment close to our school. We did pretty good in school despite the fighting, we stayed in the apartment for a year or less before my father picked us up. We were awkward with my father since we havent seen or talked to him for a long time.
I learned one thing at the time. 'Family will always come back together even after fights' that's what I believed in and boy was I wrong. A few years passed and me and my sister got phones. We started talking to our older half-sister and at first we were awkward but we started to connect.
Another fight happened and as usual we left. Our uncle picked us up at around 1am and we went to their house and they let us stay there. Me and my sister didn't mind staying at our cousins house cause it means we have playmates. We stayed there for 3 years or so, and since we had phones we were able to contact our father and have him pick us up once in a while to bond. One day I asked my mother.
"When are you and dad getting back together?" That's what I asked. My mother laughed at the time before telling me they weren't getting back together. I was in shock before I tried convincing her but she wouldnt budge.
I knew right then and their that what I believed in had failed me. I had lost faith in my parents getting back together hence me not getting a complete family.
I had also lost love in my parents. Even saying 'I love you' bothered me. I still love my sister. My half-sister lived in another country now. Honestly I had no love for my mother and father. And I felt nothing for them and had many thoughts of committing suicide but never went through with it.
A few months after I asked my mother that question I met someone online. They were trans FtM and I fell in love with them and its cliche but they were a subscriber from an old channel. The YouTuber and Subscriber(Fan) falling in in trope thing. We clicked and started dating.
It didn't go well though. Since it was a long distance relationship(LDR) the connection wasn't all that strong. I ended up losing connection with them and breaking up. I was depressed for nearly a year before I moved on.
I gave up on my old channel and started a new one. I went ahead and gave my all into my new channel before I fell in love with my best friend. We dated for a while before I broke up with him because I lost the click in him.
We stayed friends as he found someone else. But they broke up too because his gf was cheating on him. I was with him and comforted him but I fell in love with him again a few months later but I couldn't say anything cause I was sure he didn't like me anymore.
I had the confidence to ask since we dated before and he said no. That means he knows I like him and he can tease me about it. He did tease me since we stayed close friends. But a month he told me we can date. I was shocked before I accepted.
We were a good couple. Very healthy we kept the relationship strong. We would see each other a lot during school and hangout online and talk. Although that didn't last long again because God just hates my guts.
He broke up with me. He lied about the reason so I still dont know why he did it. After he broke up with me I took a break to try and forget about him. I realized it didn't work so I went back on YT and I wanted to post again. Since it worked last time I figured I should do it again. I posted a lot on Wattpad and it gave me motivation to try posting on YT again.
I had lots of ideas but I could never post anything. A few weeks after the break up it was nearly the end of school. We havent talked at all despite us being friends before. He never talked to me and I think he avoids me. I didnt mind since that would help me move on.
Though a few days before school ended I walked and talked with my friends. Feeling good about myself since I basically moved on with my ex until I walked to the canteen with my friends and he said, "Hi, (My name)" before passing me.
All of my friends and including me was very shocked. My friends know what's been happening with me and my ex and they comforted me through it all. And we all agreed that he was avoiding and ignoring me and were fine with it.
Ever since that day he said Hi to me. I was confused and bothered. So a few days after that. I made a letter related to: "If you still wanna be friends, just chat me," I wrote a few things before that but it was the main thing.
I gave it to him and I waited weeks for him to chat but he never did. I concluded he doesn't wanna be friends anymore and I FULLY accepted that.
A few weeks passed and school ended and vacation started. Many MANY problems happened to me during the month of July. My aunt getting mad at me and started disliking me after I said: "But I went to Zumba with you," context? She was talking to her son about playing games and told him to stop cause he didn't exercise.
But she said, "You all stop playing games because you guys didn't exercise," I tried my best translating it from my language to English but eh. After she said it I was very offended cause just that morning. Me, my aunt and her children. And another one of my aunts and one of her children went with us to Zumba and exercise.
After I said I went to zumba with her she got mad. Apparently what I said was back talking and it made her angry. After that I apologized but I apparently need to fix my attitude and that really confused me.
My mother ofcourse got mad at me and scolded me all the way back to her house. I was still confused after that. But I concluded that I wasn't allowed in my aunts house until I fix my attitude apparently.
A few days after that my older cousin talked to me, comforted me, and played games with me to cheer me up. While we were playing a game, someone texted me. I open discord and saw an unfamiliar pfp. I hover over it and it was my ex. Wow. He texted me as if we chat everyday. We were still in the same school and stuff and he asked what my section was.
Surprise surprise. We were classmates. But good thing is that I moved on from him already. We talked for awhile until he asked for my help. To help him with a girl he likes. I didnt wanna be rude so I gave him advice and stuff. He just asked me to ask the girl if she was taken and I did. The girl was taken so I told him that the girl was taken.
I said that whoever has the girl he likes is lucky. Cause the girl was really cute. He said that he was lucky. I put the puzzle together and I found out they were dating. I congratulated them and he told me the reason why he did the help him out with a fake crush was to surprise me that he had a gf.
It was partially my fault that he told me cause when we were still talking after breaking up I told him I would support him and to tell me if he has a new gf and stuff. He said he wanted my help cause I was one of his closest female friends.
Wow right? But no it doesn't end there. I don't wanna tell you guys what happened during the start of August but I'll tell you what happened tonight at 10pm.
My mother. Started yelling in chat about HER sacrifice for us and that we weren't making her feel like we were there. She started ranting about how much she sacrificed for me and my sister and kept asking if we would still be able to do stuff when she's dead.
She started saying about how she was jealous of her siblings having children that were so sweet and stuff, and asked why she didn't have that. I honestly felt nothing, all I got from what she ranted was how selfish she was and I pieced together how the only reason she had me and my sister was to get sweet shit out of us.
Like saying cute and sweet shit to her. She even said that she cried so many night and that she slept over at our aunts house because she was alone and she said she got depressed and nearly did suicide.
Honestly. She started having those problems when she was in her late 20's. About 25 or smth and what about me and my sister? We got problems WAY before we were born. My dad told me that he and my mother were already fighting even before I was born, and the fights were about ME.
I was the topic of fights even before I was alive. I was depressed when I was literally 10. Like huh??? My mother creating a problem about her selfish needs instead of caring about our mental health and shit.
My mother was ONLY ever physically there for me. She took care of me when I was sick and provided for me, but she NEVER cared for my other needs, like Mental health and Emotional health. The only person that took care of all 3 of those were my dad.
He just recently started taking into account about Mental and Emotional health when he started dating a girl. I absolutely adored my dad's gf. She was the complete opposite of my mother. My dad's gf was nice, understanding, caring, fun. She also actually takes genuine interest in what I play and asks questions.
When I felt sad about something and I tried to hide it, she noticed because she was VERY observant. When I cried because of a nightmare(I was sick at the time) she listened to it instead of telling me to forget about it and sleep.
She helps me with fashion choices and I love her alot. She is very religious, like she talks about God and Jesus alot but she never forces religion onto me. The way she talks about God was interesting to me and so I ask questions.
She and my mother were opposites. And I obviously choose my dad's gf but my mother is my mother. I can't do anything about it. Me and My mother had good times but I don't really remember much.
The last message my mother texted me was: "I love you both," to me and my sister. I was given so much stress and its supposed to be vacation and its killing me. Only 2 things are standing between me and death.
It sounds cliche but the second reason is my Friends and relatives I ACTUALLY love. And the first. My subscribers and followers! No matter how small or little I love you all! Even if it came to my relatives hating me. My friends hating me. As long as I make you guys happy. And you tell me I make you happy. You guys give me the will power!
I love you all so much! Even if we don't know each other individually. You guys mean more to me than you think.
It's 12am now as I type this. I'm going to sleep and hopefully calm down. If you read this book this far thank you! If you want to hear more about my life just say so. If bad things happen I'll make a chapter about it here!
Thank you all again. I'll see you all in my next book or video!
Bye bye!