Hanbin entered his apartment, slamming the door behind him with such aggression that the wall made a small crack sound. He'd have to explain that to his landlord later.
"Dude, what the fuck?!" Seunghyun yelled, coming out of his room with a pillow in hand and hair that was sticking out in all directions. Just as he was about to yell again, he saw Hanbin sit down with his head in his hands.
He walked over towards him, sitting next to him and rubbing his back comfortingly. "What happened? Is everything alright?"
"I fucked up, hyung. I fucked up so bad. Myungjae hates me and will never wanna be with me ever. Maybe it's a good thing for him, he's better off without me."
"Oh, come on, now. Don't say that! It can't be that bad, right?"
"I'm still in love with my ex."
Seunghyun paused, blinking in silence when Hanbin looked up at him with teary eyes. He bursted into tears once again as Seunghyun tried his best to console him.
"I-It's not that bad! You could've been in love with his sister or something?"
"His sister is divorced and has a child who's one of my students, why would I be in love with her?!" Hanbin asked through tears and pathetic cries.
"Hanbin, you're obviously having a breakdown. Let's calm down a bit, alright? We can take a day off tomorrow and watch a movie or something, my treat." Seunghyun said reassuringly.
The younger calmed down, hiccuping through the remaining tears. "I can't. The kids have an exam tomorrow and I can't not be there."
"Alright, fine, but I'm driving you and picking you up. I'll tell Hyeonggeun to keep an eye on you, too."
Hanbin nodded and stood up with Seunghyun, the older taking him to his room and helping him get changed. They've been friends since forever, so it wasn't an unfamiliar thing to them.
After changing into a new pair of clothes, Seunghyun insisted on tucking him in and, much to Hanbin's dismay, actually did it. He brought the blanket up to the younger's chest gently, stroking his hair.
"You'll be alright, Hanbin."
"Thanks, hyung. So much."
Seunghyun smiled softly at him before getting up, closing the lights on his way out and shutting the door behind him, leaving Hanbin all by himself.
He sighed shakily, still recovering all the tears he'd shed. Eventually, his eyes got heavy.
———
The next day, Hanbin woke up to gentle shaking and the shining sun, much unlike his usual mornings that would start with the screaming of his alarm clock. He opened his eyes to see Seunghyun.
"Morning, Binnie. There's breakfast on the table."
Hanbin sat up with a yawn and rubbed his puffy eyes. "Thanks. I'll be there in a sec."
The older nodded and got up, leaving his room once again. Hanbin took the time to stretch, as well as mentally preparing himself just in case he'd see Myungjae again.
Speaking of Myungjae, he took out his phone and checked his notifications. No response.
It was starting to worry him if he was gonna see Myungjae at all. The younger ran before he could even find him and he wouldn't have even known he was still alive if Hyunwoo— bless his heart— told him that he picked up Myungjae with Minseo and Jinho.
He decided to send another text just for good measure before closing the device and getting up.
As he went to the bathroom to wash up, he thought about everything. Myungjae, his ex, the date, just… everything.
His ex dumped him for a man who had money, yet he was still hung over her like an abandoned puppy. Even though he broke his heart and threw it into a volcano, he still hoped that she'd come back.
That was 2 years ago. He'd see her Instagram story every now and then and see that she's happy without him, being pampered by her new fiance and going out with friends.
But Myungjae? Myungjae never left him. One time, Hanbin called him while drunk and told him that he used to wet the bed until he turned 13, but Myungjae didn't judge him for it. He'd tease him, say that he was really a baby.
Myungjae never got tired of him, so why couldn't Hanbin just realize that he was there? Why did he still believe that she'd come back?
He wiped himself off and put on his clothes, leaving the bathroom and walking into the kitchen where there was a plate of food on the isle.
"Eat up, kid. We're going in 30 minutes."
Hanbin nodded and ate the breakfast Seunghyun had prepared for him, soon leaving the apartment and making their way to his car.
When he sat at the passengers seat, he finally let his mind wander.
Myungjae was kind and cute. The way his eyes lit up when he'd laugh a little to hard, or when he'd try to act cute and end up spitting a over Hanbin's face. Gross, but cute.
He was always concerned for Hanbin and never let a single thing slip under his nose, more than eager to comfort him whenever he was down. They'd cuddle in front of the TV, watching the same movie that Hanbin loved so much and would cry to all the time.
Whenever they were together in groups, Myungjae would always find a way to let Hanbin get a word in whenever he tried to speak, smiling attentively because he just loved to hear his voice.
When it was just the two of them on a lonely night, Myungjae would never forget to whisper sweet nothings into his ear, saying all the things he loved about him until they reached their climax.
Myungjae was deeply in love with Hanbin, and he threw that all away. He'd seen the red haired boy cry many times before, but seeing him try to hold it back felt even worse.
He wanted nothing more than to pull him into a tight hug the next time he saw him before falling to his knees, begging for forgiveness even if it meant being humiliated in front of hundreds of people.
If Myungjae hated him, he'd be okay with it. He deserved it. He didn't deserve to be loved by someone so pure that he broke.
That's when he realized that he didn't want his ex all that time, he wanted Myungjae, but was too scared to hurt him. He was too much of an angel to love Hanbin, thought some selfish part of him wanted him to. He wanted Myungjae to say he loves him the same way he did in bed, but with emotion. He wanted to kiss him endlessly until they were both out of breath, only pulling apart to actually breathe.
After breaking his heart, he wanted him back. Hanbin was selfish.
"Seunghyun hyung, I'm in love with Myungjae."
"Well, it's a good thing you realized, because he's right there."
Hanbin looked up immediately, not even realizing that they were already at the school. Seunghyun was pointing over to whoever had red hair that was in front of the empty kindergarten.
"Oh! And he's with-"
"Jinho?!"
The blonde shot up from his seat, unbuckling his seat belt and exiting the car. Seunghyun followed quickly, having a bad feeling by the tone of the other's voice.
It was a bit before 5 in the morning, so there were barely any students present. Just teachers and a few morning joggers.
He walked over to the two that were hugging, prying them apart and throwing a punch at Jinho's face before fisting his jacket. "Just what the hell are you doing?"
"Wha- let go of me!" Jinho struggled in his grip, only to be freed when Seunghyun caught up and pulled him away. Myungjae rushed to his side immediately. "Hyung! Hanbin, what the fuck is wrong with you?!"
"Myungjae, what are you guys doing together?!"
"He was there for me yesterday when you dumped me. What's your problem?!" His eyes were different. They didn't display the love and emotion that the usually did when looking at Hanbin, now replaced with disdain and anger.
"So he was just waiting for you to become available? That fucking-"
"Hanbin, what the hell are you going on about?" Jinho asked, picking himself off the ground and standing up. "Seunghyun hyung's my boyfriend!"
Hanbin was at shock, his anger disappearing into shock. Seunghyun had told him many times about having a boyfriend, but he just never believed him. The older was serious about his work, so he didn't think he had time for stuff like that.
"He's right. I was planning to tell you in the car, but you went batshit crazy all over him!" Seunghyun said as he let him out of his death grip.
"W-What? You two are dating?!" He asked in disbelief as the two nodded like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Just across from him, Myungjae watched, piecing two and two together.
"Did you seriously think I got together with Jinho hyung after last night?" The redhead asked, brows furrowed at Hanbin.
"I-"
"You fucking idiot." He pushed him lightly, laughing in disbelief at how someone could be so stupid.
"After what you did, do you really think I can get over you? Do you really think I can move on that fast? I fell for you, goddamit! I'm so fucking in love with you that it's pathetic!" Myungjae gripped Hanbin's shirt, twsiting the fabric in his fists as tears ran down his tired face. "Since we met, you were all I could think about, and you think of me like that? I don't want to move on! I still hope that you can fall for me too, even if I know you won't. I'll never be your boyfriend and it fucking hurts, okay?! Now fuck off! I don't wanna see you-"
He was cut off when the taller grabbed the back of his neck and smashed their lips together, shutting him up as he kissed him harshly. Through tears, Myungjae kissed back, unable to pull away despite what his brain told him.
Hanbin's hands went down to his waist, pulling him closer and closer until there was no space left for them. When he pulled away, he engulfed the other in a hug.
"I'm sorry, Myungjae. I'm so sorry for what I did. You don't have to forgive me, but if you do, I'd like to start all over again. I understand if you hate me. Just say the word and I'll never bother you again." He said in between choked sobs. There was no scenario in his mind where anything could go right. Myungjae could push him away and tell him to fuck off, he could push him away and slap him in face, or maybe he could push him onto the floor and spit on his face.
Myungjae thought of doing the same, but he couldn't get himself. No matter how hard he tried, there was no strength left for him to muster to push Hanbin away. Even though his anger was very much still present, he couldn't do anything but cry.
He knew he shouldn't be forgiving him, but he did. Hanbin meant too much to him and he didn't want to lose him again.
Myungjae cried in his arms, letting himself relax into the other's hold. "Fuck you. Fuck you so much and your pretty words. I love you, Lee Hanbin."
"I love you too, Jin Myungjae. Too much for my own good. Will you give me another chance?"
"Fine."
Hanbin pulled away from the hug, a dumb smile on his tear stained face as he looked lovingly into the other's eyes. He cupped his face and placed a kiss near his eye, nuzzling their foreheads. "Thank you, Myungjae-ah. I won't hurt you again, I promise."