The sky was grey, but the air was warm. The birds were chirping, and Theo was on the edge of his seat with a grin, wand in hand, trying to secretly zap them without Narcissa catching him again for targeting the defenseless creatures. I couldn't hold back the smile on my face as I ran through the soft grass in my bare feet, my short dress blowing in the wind as I ran after another perfect butterfly that darted between the flowers out here.
Tundra chased after my every step, pretending to join the game even if she wasn't sure what we were playing. A blue and black butterfly fluttered its wings towards my nose, making me laugh and duck to avoid it from landing on me. My heart stuttered for a beat, and I realized how carefree everything felt right now.
Not just because I got laid— though, that man took me to the pearly-white gates of heaven, so it's not completely out of the equation.
Since Draco and I had slept together, everything has felt like it was perfect. I couldn't recall the last time my life felt so happy and hopeful. I was higher than cloud nine. Higher than any drug I had tried to find a euphoric escape from through the years. I was blissfully ignorant to the depths of the waters I was slowly dragging myself into— but for now, I'd let myself enjoy this escape from reality.
I twirled around to face the porch, my giggles still filling the air and my long locks of dark hair blowing freely in the wind. My smile hurt my cheeks, and my heart pulled on the invisible string between us and faced me towards the boy that made my life feel like it could be this great one day. It could be this great forever.
His eyes were already on me, just like they always were. His appearance wasn't any more casual than it always was. He was still in his perfect button shirt and slacks, his polished shoes, and a designer watch across his wrist. One hand covered his mouth as he held up his chin and one of his ankles was crossed over his opposite knee. His lips curled up when my gleaming smile found him, but the look didn't meet his eyes. He was still locked into the real world and on his guard, but he'd let me pretend the world was a better place for now— if only to see me play on the grounds of his Manor with a smile this bold.
Draco would do anything for my smile. Especially when he knew it was because of him. And looking at the angel in front of him, he knew that the pits of hell would only drag him in further for admitting such a weakness.
My smile grew as I started walking towards him, memorizing how his eyes bored into mine and made me feel a rush of excitement and panic all at once. His soft grin revealed itself more as he removed his hand and held it out towards me, waiting for me to take it as he lowered his foot to the ground and sat up straight in his chair.
I obliged his request, a blush creeping up my cheeks as I placed my hand in his colder one and let him tug me onto his lap in the chair that sat a few feet from Theodore. He didn't miss a beat as he snaked his arm around my waist and held me sideways over his legs, his lips pressing a delicate kiss to the skin below my ear, and an exhale of contentment escaping him as we breathed each other in.
"I can't wait for Zabini to try and shoot hexes at the two of you for shagging-"
"Nott, piss off." Draco's mood was ruined as he scowled towards the boy that sat to our left. "Don't you have anyone else to annoy?"
"If I did, I don't think I would be spending my day with you, Malfoy. Get off your high horse, you're never my first pick when it comes to company." Theo fired back, but it took everything in him to bite back his sarcastic grin. "If I was a lucky man, I'd have ended up saddled with Goyle as a housemate, and pretty face over here would be perched up on my lap-" Draco's scoffing laugh cut him off as he rolled his gunmetal grey eyes.
"Now you're just spewing bullshit." Draco gave Theo one last glance before his eyes found my face again, setting my heart into an instant flutter. "Speaking of Zabini, he's coming over today." Draco's voice dropped into a low mumble as he traced his fingers over the top of my thigh, grazing the edge of my dress. "I've convinced him that it was time to have a chat." My skin prickled from the aftershocks his touch gave me.
"Do you think he's going to shoot hexes at me?" I teased just as lowly, but my smile was no longer free, but forced.
"No, darling." He replied. "I told him I just wanted to talk before I go." My heart dropped a few inches into my gut and panic took over my senses.
"Go?" My lip wobbled as much as my voice did.
"Just for a little while. I have some things I need to do for the Dark Lord." He leaned his face a little closer to mine so our noses almost touched.
It amazed me how little Draco cared about showing his weakness for me in the presence of another with Theo just a few feet away. I was just as addicted to him as he was to me. His scent, his touch, his presence— he consumed me and marked me as much as that carving of my name under his clothing did to him.
"How long will you be gone?" His fingers loosened my hand from his pressed shirt, now wrinkled from the grasp I didn't even know I had on him. Like he would slip from my fingers forever if I didn't hold on tight. The same comfort I pulled from clutching onto Tundra's fur in the same manner.
"I never know, but I always come back." He whispered against my lips. "Remember that, Rain. I always come back for you just like the sun comes back after the storm." I always knew the reserved boy had a different side, but I never knew just how poetic he was beneath the surface he had always presented the world with.
"If you're the sun, then you're my favorite kind of weather." I returned in a shaky voice.
"I'm no sun, baby. You're my rain, soft and sweet and gentle, but strong enough to pour when you need to." Draco grazed his lips over my cheek as he trailed them toward my ear. I was shivering from the anticipation he always left me with.
"And I'll always strike like thunder and lightning when you need backup." He smirked against my earlobe, tickling my skin with his chuckle before his warm lips kissed my neck. His teeth bit into my flesh teasingly to remind me of his dark side before he kissed the hurt away and held me closer to his chest.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
The air was heavy. Thick, maybe? Any way to describe how suffocating it felt to have Blaise stare at me from across the room and not know what was running through his head?
"I see no reason why we can't just come to a mutual understanding." Draco broke through the silence, his words like a sharp knife. "You don't have to understand my motives in why I do things Zabini, but I won't sit here and watch you hurt her any longer-"
"I'm not the one who's going to hurt-"
"You, see," Draco's scoff of a laugh cut him off as he swirled his honey-colored whiskey around in his glass, "you continue to say that statement because you think the more you say it out loud, it will start to sound true. You know I'm not the one in the wrong, but you want to believe so badly that it's not you that you've made yourself delusional about the reality of what's happening." He pointed out. Blaise kept his stare on me as Draco's words bounced off of him.
"Every time you try to contradict me you say the same sentences. 'I'm not the one who will hurt her. You're going to hurt her in the end.' But it's all future tense, Zabini, and the last time I checked, you've nearly failed Divination every year unless you were copying my fucking workload, so I don't think you have the inner eye to see such prophecies." Draco had a light laughter to his words, dropping it near the end. "If you'd open your outer eyes, you'd see how badly you've been affecting her in the present."
Blaise's jaw ticked, but he didn't have anything to say. I wouldn't either if I was in the same position. If there was one thing Draco was always good at, it was shutting you up with facts that you couldn't run away from. He's always been a fan of accountability... and dramatics.
There were never many people I felt the courage to stand my ground with. There were never any men that let me believe my voice or feelings mattered. But there was one who taught me how to believe in myself and to stand up for myself when I needed to, and I refused to cower from his stare across from me as the tables had turned and he was the one putting me in this position.
"Draco has done nothing but help me, Blaise, in more ways than you even know." I tried keeping my voice even, but I sounded so tired. "I- I can't sit here and guarantee that he won't hurt me, but that's as much as I can't guarantee I won't be the one to hurt him. He knows of my complications, and he's still willing to be here." I felt my hands shaking as my hands clenched into fists.
"You've taken care of me for so long, and I will always be grateful for that, but I'm not completely helpless. I can choose how I want to spend my days, and if it means I'm hanging around Malfoy and choosing to pursue him, so what?" My voice cracked as Blaise moved his gaze out the stained glass windows above us. "I don't need your permission and I don't need you to lecture me on all the things you would and wouldn't do in this life for me. What I do need is you, B. I don't want to lose all my dignity by sitting here and begging, but I need you like I need air to breathe. You're-" I sucked in a deep breath and tried not to lose my courage.
"You're the other half of me, and I need you by my side. I need you to tell me that we're okay. I need you to hold me and love me and be my person again because I can't keep trying to do this without you." I used the back of my hand to quickly wipe away a tear that fell.
"So, what I'm hearing is that Malfoy must not be the answer to all your problems if you can't bear to live without me-"
"Watch it," Draco warned under his breath, but Blaise's smirk grew at the sight of the blonde shifting in his seat. Blaise looked at me and let out a deep breath, trouble overtaking his face as he took me in.
"Come here, Princess." Blaise held his hand out for me to take. My legs wobbled as I slowly left my seat and stumbled towards him. His cool fingers set my blood on fire when he clasped his hand around mine and pulled me into his lap so I sat sideways.
So much for holding myself together.
I buried my nose into the side of his neck and let out a sob I had been holding in since our first fight. One of his hands rubbed up and down the length of my spine while the other held on to the back of my neck and held me still against him.
"You never have to beg me to be in your life, therefore your dignity is still intact." He teased despite my cries. "I'm sorry, Rainy. I've turned into such a horrible person ever since... I shouldn't let my problems lash out against you." He whispered against my hair. "It's just hard to believe he wouldn't treat you the same way he treats the other girls I've seen him run around with."
"Well, believe it or not, Zabini, I am capable of being a decent guy on rare occasions." A laugh interrupted my sobs as I laced my fingers through Blaise's and squeezed his hand. "What? Do you think something's funny, Rook? Are you going to argue that I'm not good to you after trying to convince Blaise for the last 20 minutes?" I chuckled again as I sat up straight and looked at Draco across from us. He raised his eyebrow when our eyes met, and the world melted away with that simple look.
"No. You're just funny." My smile was soft, but wouldn't budge.
"Funny?" Draco scoffed. "What makes you think I'm trying to be funny? Do I look like some kind of comedian to you?" He continued our bickering and teasing. This was us— and I think it was enough for Blaise to see that he had been wrong about Draco when it came to me.
"You don't have to try at anything to succeed, Malfoy. You're a jack of all trades." I enlightened him.
"Or a jack-in-the-box. A pale little clown with the painted-on frown and little red nose." Blaise joked, making Draco squint his eyes and glare while I let out a sweet laugh.
"Anything else you two want to try and gang up on me for? Maybe I should've kept you separated." Draco's humor was drier than ours as he finished off his whiskey in one gulp.
"You forgive me?" Blaise's breath was warm against my ear as he whispered the question. "I'll make it up to you if you don't. You will with time." He promised after my moment of hesitation, his thumb rubbing the back of my hand. "Your forgiveness should be earned, Rain. People have to work for it. You don't have to give it to me yet just because I'm ready to apologize." His brown eyes looked at me like I was his favorite girl in the world again. Blaise. My boy. My B. "You always get a say in what you choose. Even if it involves spending some of your time with Malfoy." He sighed, looking back over at Draco. I felt my smile lighting up my face as I squeezed his hand again.
"He's not half bad." I joked with a wink, watching as the predator's gaze in his eyes grew. He doesn't fool me for a second. He loves the chase between us, always unpredictable and never promising. He wants to play.
"I'll give you a 30-second head start." He said casually, flipping the roles so he was the one wearing a smirk that kept me in the dark.
"What?" Blaise and I both shared a glance before Draco elaborated.
"30 seconds, Rainbow. You better hide quickly if you want to play games with me." He slowly stood from his chair and placed his glass down on the wooden table. "If I don't find you in the next 15 minutes, I'll give you a proper goodbye before I leave for work-"
"That's not fair! You don't even know when you'll be back, and I want to win! But I don't want to throw my chances just to-" I sat up straight off of Blaise's legs.
"Please, don't elaborate any further on what you two qualify as a proper goodbye. I'm already assuming that in my time avoiding this place, too many things have happened that would make me want to gouge my eyeballs out of their sockets." Blaise shivered under me as he pushed me off of him so my feet landed on the floor. "I'm going to go find Nott. I think I'm overdue for a chat with him, too." Blaise rubbed my back again before he slipped away. "I'll finish my talk with you when you get back, daddy-loving twat."
"Don't fucking call me that, mummy's boy!" Draco called after him as Blaise kept his back to us and left, his laughter just loud enough to hear as he flipped his middle finger back over his shoulder. "Guess he's been away from work long enough to gain some of his personality back." Draco straightened out the cuffs of his jacket as we both stared at the now-empty doorframe.
"Yeah." I sighed. I had mixed feelings of emptiness that Blaise was no longer here and fulfillment now that he was back. It was strange, but I couldn't wait until I could see him again in just a few minutes.
"Sweetheart?" My heart fluttered and melted into a puddle of nothing as Draco's warm breath sent shivers down my spine, his lips brushing against the shell of my ear. His hands slowly slid over my hips as he stood behind me, grazing over the loose thin material of my dress as he drew circles on my stomach with the pads of his fingers.
"Yes?" I croaked out as he pulled me back against his chest and slowly peppered kisses over my pulse point, taking his sweet time to breathe me in. His movements paused as he moved his lips back to my ear.
"Run."
I held my breath as I took off in a sprint. My blood thumped with anticipation and excitement from the tone of his words. My pride was something I was going to have a hard time overpowering, but maybe I'd be willing to throw it all aside and let him win just to see what he had in mind if he found me.
His voice echoed in my head, making my limbs feel weak as I focused on how clouded my judgment had become. This was all a part of it, and it was a lesson I had been trying to learn. He knew that. He was dangling the carrot over my head to see if I'd jump for it.
Fend for me or give up just for a guy.
Clever, Malfoy. Always so concise.
"I like to think so." Thunder cracked around us as my vision become lost in a haze of black smoke. My heart and voice were both stuck in my throat and I crashed into his chest as he caught me by the wrists, pinning them against his sternum as he pulled me into himself with a glimmer in his eyes.
"You scared me." I panted in a voice that squeaked, not removing my gaze from his as I tried catching my breath.
"Sorry, angel." His blown pupils were as dark as the smoke that was clearing around us as he backed me toward the wall of the hallway.
"Were you— were you just in my head?" I felt my desperation wash away as a new feeling started to fill me. Annoyance, anger, betrayal, vengeance. I hated when he'd sneak in there without me knowing, slithering through silently like a cobra that wants to strike on the poor mouse. His amusement only grew with my disdain.
"We've talked about this before, Rook." He tsked, slowly sliding one of his cold hands down my arm, up my shoulder, and to my neck. His opposite hand held both of my wrists tightly, but they were loose enough for me to break free if I wanted to. "You can't leave your head open or the wrong person will slip inside you." He brushed his nose against mine as my head tilted back against the wall behind us, a soft moan escaping me as I fluttered my eyes shut.
"Or maybe I want the right person to slip inside me." I giggle as his hands tighten around me and his mouth smirks against my smiling lips.
"Dirty girl." His low voice makes me feel breathless before his mouth claims mine in a searing kiss that I'll think of for hours, days until he returns. My hands break out of his hold and latch onto the sides of his neck, brushing my fingertips over the hair on his nape.
"You can't say things like that right before I have to go." He scolds when we break free from one another, still sharing the same breath as his thumb brushed over my throat where his hand rested. His hips pressed into me, making me gasp and try to feel more. "I don't have time to prove I'm the right one to slip inside you." His words mumbled into my ear before I'm moaning from the feel of his smirking mouth on the skin of my neck.
"Then make time, baby." I scratched my nails through the back of his hair and found myself latching my leg around his hip, giving him more access to grind his hips into mine.
"I wish I could." My hold on him tightened when I could hear the longing in his voice. I whimpered when he slowly lowered my leg back down and his hands turned gentle as he cupped them around my jaw. "Don't look at me like that. I can't take it." He rubbed his thumb over my pouting lip and studied my face.
"I don't want you to leave me again," I whispered, looping my hands around his hips to feel him before I lost my opportunity.
"Only for a little while." He promised, cocking his head to the side. "You're more than capable of surviving without me. You know that." But my gut says otherwise... "Don't start that. You've made it as far as you did without me-"
"Get out of my head, Malfoy." I hissed with a glare, but he could read right through my threatening tone. His lips lifted so gently at the corners that everything inside of me felt like it was falling at his feet. I don't know how I made it without you. I barely did.
"I know." He whispered, cradling my cheeks with his cold hands and tipping my chin up to match his stare. His smile hovered more, defying my command and still doing as he pleased. "I'll always live in your head, baby, even if I didn't put myself there." He winked.
"I care about you." I admitted. I don't know when I started speaking about such vulnerabilities out loud, but it felt right to say. His response came without hesitation.
"Me, too." He breathed. "I have to go." He grumbled.
"Okay." I didn't mean it, and he knew it. But there's nothing I can do.
"Work on your shields with Nott." He brushed his lips over my cheek. "Make sure I'm the only one that's been slipping in that pretty little head." He peppered a few kisses across my jaw before he found my lips, pulling my bottom one between his teeth.
"Be safe." I gave the fabric covering his chest a squeeze and his eyes opened to find mine right in front of him. There was a shift in the way his eyes dilated. You could feel the shift in the air even if it wasn't spoken of.
"See you soon."
The smoke covered my eyes like a blindfold, and the crack of thunder made me jump and gasp before I could even blink and realize it was his departure.
He was gone.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
I looked out towards the yard and felt my smile before I thought about it. The negative energy between the two boys had resolved rather quickly it seemed, their dueling by the maze of bushes in the backyard allowing them to hash things out.
I rolled my eyes and shook my head. Boys always have been so easy to predict.
"Your aim is getting lazy, Zabini." I teased, taking a step out of the manor and striding onto the back porch. He dropped his wand and turned to face me.
"You think you could do better— fuck! Theo! What the hell!" Blaise was now sprawled on his back while Theo twirled his wand between his fingers.
"Basic rules, Zabini. Never turn your back on the opponent." Theodore pretended to blow on the tip of his wand like it were a smoking gun. "I've been practicing that one on the peacocks." Theo lifted his brows toward me with a smirk and a wink.
A laugh left my chest and I threw my head back, climbing down the stairs to join them.
Things are going too well. I know that now.
But I can't wake up from the dream playing in front of me.