tw - none
I mean, we both hurt each other a lot.
And I don't ever want to hurt you again.
THAT COLD DECEMBER NIGHT was what made Joanna Fisher want to go back to December all the time.
She didn't want anything more or anything less, she just wanted to dance on the snow-covered beach with her first love.
She wanted to lay by the campfire and experience that euphoria once again. How Belly held onto her tight, how they tangled together with love and not lust.
Because there was a difference. There were relationships made out of pure love and romance and support and just undying devotion.
And then there were relationships made out of pure lust and desire and pining and just jealousy.
Belly and Jo didn't have that. They didn't.
Did they?
•••
HER BACK ACHED LIKE crazy as she opened her eyes, the small faint sound of Stay by Gracie Abrams coming from her phone which lay close by her head.
Joanna sat up and stretched, arms cracking. She cringed, looking down at her clothing to see she was changed into pajama pants and a t-shirt that she was sure belong to Conrad.
"What in the hell?" She whispered, looking around the room.
The door opened and in walked Conrad, "finally." He muttered.
The blonde girl sat up fully, sitting crisscross on the sleeping bag and looking at her brother who took a seat in front of her. "What happened? I wasn't even drunk." She whispered, cupping her head in her hands.
"Found you passed out on the shore. You were half asleep when I told you to change and you instantly went back to sleep." Conrad explained to her. "What the hell were you thinking, Jo? You could've drowned." He scolded like a dad.
"I wasn't!" She yelled, looking up at him. "I just— I wasn't thinking, and me and Belly fought and everything was just so sucky." She expressed, not tearing her eyes from his as she spoke. Her heart felt heavy as she spoke. "I honestly just want to pack up and get the fuck outta here." She said in a serious tone.
Conrad sighed and nodded. Suddenly a slap echoed through the hallway and the siblings stood up, walking to the doorway and leaning out. Belly was storming down the hallway, still in her party outfit, looking disheveled.
"Belly." A familiar voice down the hall called.
Belly looked up and paused, making eye contact with Joanna. She glanced back at the room she'd come out from before continuing forward. Jo looked down the hall toward Jeremiah, memories of last night filling her mind.
•••
THE SPRAY PAINTED WALL in front of Joanna made her whimper. She bought her hand to her mouth and chewed on her nails nervously.
The house was trashed with red solo cups, streamers, and a bunch of other random trash. Polaroids were laid around the house of random
people and things were broken and shattered.
This wasn't the summer house.
"Steven, what the hell?" The three kids turned to see Laurel standing in the kitchen, staring at the mess around her with shock. "Belly drunk-dials me, and I drive all night to find... this?" She asked, motioning to the mess around them. "I'm just glad your mom isn't here to see what you guys did to her house."
Joanna clenched her hand slightly, keeping her head held high and she looked at Laurel.
"I want this place spotless and for every single thing of Susannah's to be put back exactly where it belongs." She ordered. "If even one thing is broken or missing, I swear to God!
"Mom, we weren't the ones who moved her stuff," Steven spoke up.
"It was Aunt Julia." Conrad explained, "she's the one who emptied it, not us."
Laurel stared at Conrad, the look on her face unreadable.
"To sell it," Joanna whispered, hoarse. Laurel's gaze snapped to Jo and her face dropped.
"But I thought Susannah talked to her lawyers." She mumbled. "She told me she reached out to Julia right before things got bad—"
"Wait." Steven cut her off, "why didn't you say anything?" He asked. "Conrad had to find out from a 'for sale' sign in the front yard." He informed sternly and upset.
Laurel's face had a guilty look on it. "I just assumed they resolved it before Susannah..." she trailed off and sharply inhaled, "Does your guys' dad know?" She asked, turning her attention to the two siblings.
"Of course, he knows!" Conrad exclaimed, "and of course, he's done nothing at all to help us!"
"That's why them three and Belly came here." Steven defended the Fishers, "they were trying to work something out with Aunt Julia themselves."
"And?" Laurel asked, having a feeling she already knew the answer.
"We failed." Jo spoke up, wiping a stray tear from under her eye, "Julia already sold the house to a family. They finalized the deal yesterday." She told the woman.
"But like you said," Conrad began, "at least Mom's not here to see it." He said coldly before walking away.
Joanna made eye contact with Laurel, an apologetic look on her face, before following after Conrad.
•••
AFTER CHANGING INTO NEW clothes and eating candy and popcorn for breakfast, the group of teens were all gathered in the kitchen picking up all the trash from the party.
Joanna held out a trash bag for Conrad and followed idly behind him as he threw trash into the black bag. AirPods sat snug in her ears, and she bobbed her head along to the music.
"What are you listening to now?" Conrad asked, glancing back at her.
"Rose-Colored Boy." She answered. He gave a confused look. She rolled her eyes. "You know, 'Lowkey, no pressure, just hang with me and my weather'." She sang out loud with a little laugh, gaining the attention of Taylor.
"I love that song!" She exclaimed with a big smile.
Suddenly Laurel walked in, clearing her throat and making them all go quiet. Joanna quickly grabbed her phone from her back pocket and paused the music.
The seven looked at Laurel expectantly, staying quiet. She sighed before beginning. "I owe you all an apology. You guys have been there for each other and I haven't and I'm deeply sorry for that." She apologized sincerely.
"We've all made mistakes, Mom," Belly said quietly, looking at the woman beside her.
Laurel nodded, "well, my biggest one is trusting that Beck and Julia had come to an agreement about the beach house before she passed." She admitted. "It's probably too late to change things, but I'd like to try." Conrad's face brightened as he lifted his head to look at Laurel. "I'll talk to Julia, see if I can change her mind."
Jeremiah walked over to Laurel, pulling her into a hug. "Thank you, Laurel." He whispered as she accepted the hug.
Skye hopped off the counter, "before my mom gets her, though, we should probably try and make this place look less... shitty." They motioned to their surroundings.
The group instantly agreed, continuing their pick-up.
•••
THE FRONT DOOR OF the house opened and shut. Joanna peeked around the corner from the kitchen and groaned.
"Is that blood?" Aunt Julia asked, seeing her child scrubbing something red off of a wooden pillar.
"It's uh— it's Cherry Kool-Aid and Goldschläger... I think." Skye responded, unsure. "Um, you're... early." They stood up, alarmed by Aunt Julia's presence.
Julia scoffed, "I'm also in breach of my sales agreement." She said, walking down the hall toward the living room where Joanna was still peaking around the corner. "What happened to this place? It's a disaster." She muttered, entering the living room to see Jo and Conrad. "Oh, my God, you kids are exhausting."
"You're a bit exhausting yourself, Julia," Joanna responded with a smile.
Her aunt turned to her, about to put her in her place but Laurel appeared, making the older woman stop. "Hey, Julia. Thanks for coming." She spoke calmly.
"Uh, Skye didn't give me much of a choice, so." She pointed toward her child.
Laurel motioned toward the back door. "Can we have a chat while the kids clean up?" She asked.
"Okay." Julia gave in, making her way outside.
Joanna walked behind her and stuck up the middle finger, Conrad slapped her arm down making her chuckle, looking up at her brother and shrugging.
"You always wanna cause trouble," Steven muttered, looking at the blonde.
"If you want me to say that cheesy ass line where it's like 'trouble is my middle name' you are about to be so disappointed." She muttered making the group around her share a small fit of laughter.
•••
THE TWO WOMEN WALKED back inside the house, both with pleasant looks on their faces.
Laurel didn't look like she wanted to fist-fight Julia, and Julia didn't look like she was annoyed with everyone around her which was a great sign.
Julia sighed as all the kids turned to look at her, "I've... decided to pull out of the sale." She revealed.
Skye came up behind their mom and hugged her tightly in celebration.
Joanna dropped her broom, holding back a scream. "Please tell me you aren't bullshitting." She asked in a serious tone.
Julia laughed, "I am not bullshitting." She said in a promising tone.
"Oh, my God!" Joanna did a small dance in place.
"Let's not celebrate yet." Laurel cut the kids off. "We still need to convince your guys' dad to buy the house from Julia." She explained, pointing to Julia before backing away and pulling out her phone for which, Joanna assumed, was to call their dad.
Jo smiled, "I'm gonna go throw this out." She told her older brother who nodded, wearing a smile on his face as well.
The blonde stumbled out the back door while pressing play on her music, Demons by A$AP Rocky playing. She hummed along to it, taking the long way to the trashcan with a bop of her head every now and then.
She made it to the trashcan, and out of her peripheral view she saw Belly coming over. Jo opened up the trashcan, "after you." She motioned.
Belly smiled, "thank you." She chuckled, throwing the black bag inside the gray trashcan, Joanna's bags following after it.
Joanna went to walk away but noticed Belly standing idly as if waiting for Joanna to turn to her. The blonde did, reluctantly.
"You know, I'm almost afraid to say it out loud," Belly smiled up at the girl, "but I'm... feeling hopeful." She shrugged, holding eye contact with the blonde. "I mean, my mom's always been pretty good at schooling your dad."
Jo tilted her head to the side, "thank you for calling Laurel." She said. "I meant to say it earlier, but then..." she motioned around randomly with her hands. Belly nodded, signaling she understood what Joanna meant. "It just feels amazing to have her here, helping us out."
"Yeah." Belly agreed. She hesitated, looking at Jo and slightly turning her body to walk away.
And before Joanna could stop herself, she paused her music and the words slipped from her mouth.
"Can we talk about last night?" She asked with hesitation, scared of being shot down.
Belly exhaled, making a straight line with her lips. "Honestly, last night was, uh, kind of a blur." She half-lied. "Whatever... whatever I said—"
"No, no." Joanna shook her head, cutting the brunette off. "You were right. I was a dick and I never should've ended things like that." She got straight to the point. "And the fucked-up thing is, I figured I was doing the right thing by you."
"You... you were going through a lot." Belly reasoned.
Jo shook her head. "That's not an excuse." She stated, making eye contact with Belly once more which made the Conklin girl nervous. "And I just hate the thought of looking back..." Joanna hesitated about the next few words she had in her mind. "I just hate the thought of looking back on the night we had here and regretting it."
Belly slightly dropped her head forward, "of course, it hurts to think about that night." She admitted, "but I don't regret it. I don't regret any of the times we were together." She stated, shaking her head. "I... I loved you."
Joanna felt a sharp pain in her chest.
"And I know you loved me, too."
'Loved'.
That word was an understatement for how Joanna felt about Belly. Everything Belly did was like art. The way she talked, moved, danced. Joanna admired every move Belly made because she was absolutely and utterly obsessed with making sure Belly had the best in life. To make sure the brunette would get what she wanted. All Joanna wanted to see her be happy.
So to say love was just totally an understatement.
But Jo rolled with it because that's what Belly wanted.
"If I could go back in time and I could..." the blonde muttered, "do things differently, I
would—"
"Joanna," Belly cut her off, "it's okay." She decided, "I mean, we both hurt each other a lot."
"And I don't ever want to hurt you again." Jo expressed.
Belly gave a thin-lipped smile, "I don't want to hurt you again, either." She stated. "I mean, I don't know if it's something we can control, but, um... we can try."
Joanna's eyes softened.
"Friends?"
Friends.
Fuck.
Jo smiled, nodding, and let Belly walk forward, pulling her into a hug. And instead of wrapping her arms around Belly's lower waist, she made sure to keep her arms higher, holding her close as if it was the last hug she'd give the Conklin girl.
Then they pulled away from each other and Belly gave Jo one last smile which lingered in the air as she left. Joanna felt the ghost of Belly's arms around her and savored the feeling as the pain in her chest increased. She turned away, putting a hand to her chest as she started her music again.
I Know You played and a tear fell from her eye which she instantly wiped away, skipping the song and letting out a small hiccup.
•••
THE FRONT DOOR OF the house opened, and the group of kids slowly piled into the living room beside the kitchen, where Laurel and Adam were talking.
They tip-toed on the hardwood floor, trying to make the least amount of sound humanly possible.
"Thanks for coming all this way to back me up." The man said with a mouthful of food. Jo rolled her eyes. "They haven't been making it easy on me."
There was a silence, and then, "oh, I'm not here to back you up." She broke the news to the Fisher man. "I'm here to back up your kids." She stated simply, and the mocking smile on her face could be heard through her tone. "You can't let them lose this house, Adam."
"Well, it's done," Adam spoke, not having any remorse. "Julia sold it."
Footsteps entering the kitchen were heard,
letting the group behind the wall know Julia had entered the room. "Actually, I, um... changed my mind." She told Adam. "Hi."
Adam let out a dry laugh. "Okay, well, let's get something straight here, I'm not letting them lose anything. This has been out of my hands since the start." He expressed. "So, don't go making me the bad guy here."
Conrad went to walk forward and Jeremiah quickly grabbed his arm, stopping him. "Let someone else try to solve the problem for once." He spoke lowly to his brother.
"So what? You're just gonna dissolve the trust and gift the kids the beach house?" He asked Julia in a serious tone.
"No, she can't do that," Laurel spoke up. "She has a child of her own to consider."
"Yeah, well, I'm not gonna squander their trust to buy this house, and frankly, I'm surprised that you would support that," Adam spoke to Laurel.
Laurel made a face. "When did I ever say that?" She asked. "I just want you to move some
money around and buy it for them." The mom reasoned.
"What?"
"Fair market value, terms negotiable, of course." Julia pipped in.
"I think, um, I'm gonna go now because that's... that's not happening, end of story." He tried to finalize.
Julia walked forward, "uh, you know what? I have a question for you." She walked up to Adam, "why is it that those three kids have been trying harder for the last three days to save this house than you have in the last several weeks?"
"Adam—"
"No, shut up, Laurel." Adam cut her off. "Listen to me. You don't have a vote, okay?" Joanna scoffed. "I know Suze made you feel like this house is part yours, but it's not—"
Before anyone could do anything, Conrad walked around the corner and made his presence known. "Where do you get off saying shit like that?" He asked.
"Con—" the rest of the kids came around the corner and Adam went silent. "It's for the best." He stayed before turning to Laurel again. "Did you really think railroading me would change my mind?"
Laurel placed a hand on her hip. "Excuse me, but fuck you." She bit.
"Okay, all right, all right, let's—"
"Suze wouldn't want us fighting like this," Adam claimed.
"You have no idea what she would want!" Conrad yelled at him. "You lost her a long time ago."
"Can't you get past your own grief and see what it means to your kids." She motioned to the three who stood in front of the group.
Adam turned to them, "look, I thought it would be better this way." He claimed. "Easier for everyone if we let this place go."
"Easier for you." Conrad accused.
"Yeah," Adam said with a sigh, looking at his eldest. "Being here is hard. It's hard. Uh..." he looked at the floor. "She's everywhere here."
Joanna stepped forward, "that's the point, Dad." She spoke sincerely making eyes go to her. "I don't know if the boys agree but being her surrounded by memories of her makes me happy." Her voice broke. "I don't want to forget about her and all the things she's done for me because Mom is so important to me." She brought a hand to her nose and let out a small l hiccup as Steven pulled her back and hugged her.
Laurel stepped forward, "she loved you." She told Adam. "I tried to talk some sense into her. It's not secret I've never been your biggest fan." She tried to joke. "But she wouldn't listen, because when Beck set her mind on something, that's it." She went quiet before tilting her head to the side, "she set her mind on you, Adam. And on making this house a special place for our kids."
Adam reached up and rubbed his eyes.
"Do this one last thing for her."
There was a quietness and Adam hesitated.
"Dad," Jere spoke lowly, on the verge of tears. "Please?" what
Adam sighed, looking between the adults and teens. "Look, I'm not gonna let them use their trusts." He stated. "But if I sell the Boston house, that could give us enough." He reasoned.
Joanna pulled out of Steven's hold, eyes slightly widening.
"You'd all be at school mostly anyway, but we can't afford both houses." He told his kids. "Is this really what you want?"
"Yeah," Conrad said, mouth dry.
"Yeah." Jere agreed.
Adam looked at his daughter who instantly nodded. "Yes. Yeah." She mumbled.
"Okay, then." Adam finalized.
A big weight on Joanna's chest disappeared and she covered her mouth, looking at her brothers who seemed relieved themselves, ad Conrad clutched Jeremiah's arm in victory and Jere himself let out a breath of relief before backing away, leaving out the back door.
Joanna looked at Conrad who motioned toward where Jeremiah had left. She nodded. The two walked together out the back door and followed his sandy footprints down to the beach where he stood idly and mysterious, looking out at the sea.
"Hey." Jo whispered, taking place by Jeremiah while Conrad stood next to her. Jere stayed quiet. Joanna sighed. "I know you're still mad at me about last night." She said, "I've been thinking all day, about it and trying to come up with what to say to you."
Jere sighed. "I should've told you how I felt, or how I've been feeling," she turned and looked over at her, "for most of our lives about everything."
"Well, Jere, I— I just assumed..." she lost her train of thought. "Everything seems to come so easily to you all the time." She explained. "The way it just rolls off your back. But I—" she shrugged, "I should've known better. Stopped distancing myself from you and paid more attention, looked harder and I'm sorry for not doing that." She said sincerely, glancing over at her twin.
"I— I don't want to be that guy anymore." He explained. "You know, like, always smiling whether he's happy or not. It's hard."
Joanna looked at him, "you don't have to." She said, kicking sand with her shoe. "It was kinda crazy, man, you and Belly scolding me the same exact night, five minutes apart." Jere's lips slightly perked up, a smile crossing his face. "It was really funny, to be honest, that night was fun besides from the... other stuff that happened." She spoke awkwardly, being reminded of Ezra's stupid face. "But I guess I deserved everything I got that night, in a way." Her eyes glossed over.
She snapped out of her trance and looked over at Jere once more, "uhm, and me and Bells talked this morning." She said to both brothers. "We're friends now," Joanna informed in a weird voice.
Jere went quiet, looking away from Jo.
"But I'm serious." She spoke quickly. "I don't like fighting with you, I hate fighting with you. We never fight." Jo averted her eyes away from Jeremiah and to the sand which she kicked again. "Us three? That's all we have." She motioned between the three of them.
Her twin nodded, "all right, so we talk." He said to his siblings. "You know, something comes to
mind, we say it, and— and whether it hurts or pisses each other off."
Conrad nodded, "yes. We talk." He agreed.
There was a silence.
"I got into Stanford." Conrad blurted.
Jere did a double take on his brother. "What?"
Conrad made a thin line with his lips. "Yeah, I applied to transfer a while back, with Mom." He told Jeremiah. "And I didn't want... I didn't want to tell you 'cause..." he trailed off, thinking. "I didn't want to tell you 'cause I didn't want you to think I was deserting you or... or something." He admitted.
"But, look, I'm not gonna go. I'm gonna stay at Brown." He told his siblings. "I'm not going." He finalized.
Joanna looked up at him and leaned into his arm, "if you're not going to Stanford I'm not going to NYU." She stated
"You got into NYU?" Conrad asked as he and Jere turned to her.
She shrugged, "let's go inside." She detached from Conrad and began to jog back toward the house.
•••
THE THREE SIBLINGS ENTERED the house through the side door, walking into a kitchen that was fully empty except for their dad.
"Hey, I just, uh," he walked into the room, meeting his children halfway, "wanted to let you guys know I'm— I'm going up to Boston. I'm gonna start getting things in order." He said.
Jere walked forward and hugged him, whispering a small thanks.
"And, uh, I just want to say, um," he looked at his feet nervously like a child, "to all three of you, I'm sorry. I know I haven't been the best, uh, dad, and, uh, best husband to your mom." He admitted which Joanna appreciated.
"Well," Conrad began, looking up at their dad. "Thank you for helping us save Mom's house." He hesitantly walked forward and hugged his dad, patting him on the back.
Adam looked at Joanna who seemed skeptical. He nodded with a small sigh before turning, going to leave the kitchen.
On last-minute thoughts, Jo jogged forward and hugged her dad from behind, "bye, Dad. Thank you." She whispered, her cheek pressed against his back.
There was a small smile on Adam's face as he patted Jo's hands that were around his waist, "bye, Kiddo." He said in reply before Joanna let go and backed away, the adult leaving the house.
Then the three were left again. Jere walked toward the counter, leaning on it. "You guys got into your dream schools." He stated.
"Jere—"
"I'm not gonna let you give up on your dream and stay at Brown or let Joanna go to Finch just because you're trying to do right by me." He stated, "I'll be fucking pissed."
"It's not—" Conrad sighed. "I don't know about Jo, but there's more to it."
Joanna raised her eyebrow. "Like?"
He shrugged, "like, they'll probably pull my acceptance for missing my final tomorrow." He explained.
"Cool." Jere said, looking at his brother, "then you won't miss it."
"Jere, there's no way I would pass it." He stated, looking at his two siblings. "Escobar's exams are nearly impossible when I'm up-to-speed, let alone now—"
"So it's possible?" Jo cut him off. Conrad gave her a look and she only shrugged. "We'll have an
all-night study... session." She declared.
Jeremiah nodded, "we'll get you all ready for it. It's no problem."
Conrad shook his head, looking between the twins who wore smiles. "Don't look at me like that."
Jeremiah grabbed a piece of bacon, "look at you like what?" He played clueless.
•••
THE LARGE GROUP GATHERED outside the house with each other.
Laurel and Julia walked over, smiling. "All right, don't look too happy." Julia joked. "You're not getting rid of me forever. Your wicked Aunt Julia is still just a phone call away."
Conrad nodded, "thank you for everything."
"I'm glad it worked out."
Laurel pointed at the kids. "We should get going, too."
Jeremiah hesitated. "Uh, actually," he looked at his siblings, "I was wondering can— can you stay for, like, one more night?" He asked, looking back at Laurel who tilted her head to the side, hesitant.
"Come on," Joanna spoke up. "We have to help Con study for his final. It's tomorrow."
Steven motioned to himself, "dude, you know I'm eighteen, right? Like, I don't need my mom's permission to..." he trailed off, looking over at Laurel who was already narrowing her eyes his way. "I need my mom's permission to study." He corrected himself making his mom laugh.
"Laurel, please," Conrad begged. "They're not gonna let me transfer to Stanford if I don't pass this." He persuaded.
Laurel gave him a look, "you better do more than just pass." She ordered.
Conrad saluted, "yes, ma'am."
"You got in?" Belly asked.
The boy nodded, "yeah." He smiled, wrapping an arm around Joanna, "we're all getting into our dream colleges today."
Belly's eyes widened, "you got into NYU?" She asked and her eyes went to Joanna who nodded.
"Does this mean I have to sleep in a sleeping bag?" Laurel asked, annoyed.
Aunt Julia perked up. "Oh, we've got the motel room for one more night. You want it?" She offered.
Laurel instantly nodded. "Oh, heck yes. Thank you."
And with that, they all bid farewell to Skye and Aunt Julia sharing hugs and promising to call, which they did. The phone did ring this time, and the four teenagers gathered inside.
Belly grabbed Jo'd hand. "So proofreading your application essay five times really went to good use, huh?" She asked.
Jo shook her head. "It was not five times."
"Yes, it was," Belly argued in a whisper.
The blonde shook her head. "I guess it did go to good use." She shrugged, winking at the Conklin girl before walking inside the summer house.
Jo took a seat on top of the trashcan, since their barstools were all gone, and laid her top half across the counter, wrapping her arms around her head as Conrad entered the room.
"I'm too exhausted to eat." He muttered as Steven took a bite of the old bacon.
"I could pass out on the counter right now." Jere muttered.
Steven pointed to Joanna, "looks like Jo already did." The girl's body could be seen slowly rising up and down, head tucked away with her eyes closed, knocked out in less than seconds.
"All right." Belly came into the kitchen and clapped making Joanna's head shoot up. "Come on. It's time to start studying, you lazy bums." She ordered, patting Jo's back as she laid her head down again.
"Tired." The blonde simply said.
"Okay, I'm tired too, but it's— it's already afternoon." She reasoned. "I mean, we have to work all night and leave really early tomorrow."
Steven yawned, "who invited her again?" She asked.
"Con works best under pressure." Joanna spoke up, raising her head, "she's a great asset." She turned her head to look at Belly. "But we are all so tired, so please, one hour Bells?" She asked in a begging tone.
Belly sighed, looking down at the blonde and giving in, "fine. One hour, and that is it." She decided.
"Love you Belly, you angel." She slurred, slipping off the trashcan. "Let's go boys." She motioned behind her before leaving the kitchen.
•••
JOANNA TOSSED AND TURNED as a wet sprinkle fell onto the back of her neck. She didn't move and stayed laying down on her stomach, attempting to go back to sleep
"Rise and shine," Belly said, spraying water on her again.
"No thank you." She whispered, voice raspy and already feeling herself be pulled back into sleep.
Suddenly her body was lifted up and she let out a squeak of surprise, "dude!" She yelled as Conrad carried her through the living room, placing her down when getting to the kitchen.
She turned around and gasped at the sight on the counter. Steven walked past, taking a bite of a cheeseburger.
Jere reached forward, "yes! Mickey D's cheeseburgers!" He celebrated but Belly slapped his hand away.
"No, no." She shook her head. "These are the crucial part of the reward system."
"Why does he get to have one?" Jeremiah asked, pointing to Steven.
The Conklin girl ignored him. "All right,
okay, this is how it's gonna work." She began, "Conrad studies, he gets a burger." She motioned to him.
"What about us?" The twins said in sync.
Belly smiled, leaning onto the counter with one hand while the other placed itself on her hip. "Conrad studies, you guys get a burger." She said.
Jere rolled his eyes and walked away, Conrad following him.
Jo tilted her head to the side, looking at Belly. "Reward system, huh?" She asked. Belly nodded, proud of herself. Jo slightly stepped forward, "and what else do I get?" She asked.
Belly's face turned red as she motioned to the wrapped-up burgers, "just the cheeseburgers."
Joanna pouted, "no fries?"
The Conklin rolled her eyes, "ok, let's get to it!" She clapped. "I have a practice test." She handed the paper to Conrad.
"Thank you, Belly. Seriously." Conrad smiled before beginning on the test.
And that's what happened for the next... how many hours it was.
Conrad answered a few questions correctly, they got cheeseburgers. Every time Belly threw it to them Jere would fumble and Joanna would catch it perfectly, Conrad was bipolar on it.
Then Jere and Conrad resorted to doing push-ups to 'boost their energy'.
Joanna was knocked out a few times only to have Belly snap in her face and give her food.
But they all worked hard for Conrad, one writing things down, one highlighting, one proofreading index cards, and one reading while Belly orchestrated the whole thing.
"Come on guys!" Belly yelled when noticing them all becoming excessively tired, and when the food was running low. "We still got miles to go before we sleep."
Joanna dropped her head onto the book she was highlighting, letting out a yawn.
Belly sighed, reaching into her back pocket. "All right. Fine. You know what?" She muttered to herself, clicking buttons on her phone. Music soon started to play.
"Hey! Mom loved this song." Joanna smiled, lifting her head off of the book when hearing Last Nite by The Strokes begin to play. "I love this song!"
"Duh!" Belly smiled, walking toward the blonde, "come on!"
"Where?" She asked as the Conklin pulled her up by the hand.
"Dance breaks are essential."
"Oh! Yeah!" Jo smiled, "come on, Connie." She disconnected her hand from Belly's and attached it to Conrad's. "Let's go you big lug."
He shook his head, "I don't dance." He said.
"Yeah, you do." She said, beginning to jump around in front of the boy as he grabbed food. "Belly help me!" She told the girl.
The two began to dance around together in front of Conrad making the boy smile, watching them get along.
Jere and Steven were dancing wildly together beside them, hands connected as they head-banged.
Soon enough all the teens were dancing together, singing along to the music with large smiles and laughter.
Everything felt so perfect at that moment. They weren't stressing or crying or arguing with each other, they were having fun and being carefree like they were supposed to be in the summer house.
And all reminders of the bad things from last night flew from everyone's heads.
•••
THE BLONDE GIRL YAWNED as she woke up, stretching her arms and standing up and stumbling slightly.
She looked outside and saw it was nighttime, she sighed. The girl grabbed cold fries from the island and put them in her mouth, tip-toeing outside and down the back porch stairs to collapse on a brown lawn chair.
Her dry lips parted as she looked up at the sky which was brightened with stars.
Joanna smiled, tucking a hair behind her ear and closing her eyes.
There was faint walking heard and then s body sat gently beside her on the other lawn chair.
Without looking at the person next to her, knowing who it was, she opened her eyes again. "Venus is still an evening star," Jo whispered. "It's really pretty tonight."
Belly smiled widely. "You remembered?" She asked.
"I remember everything you tell me, Belly," Jo spoke with a yawn. "Like how you snore when you're really sleeping, or that your favorite candy is SourPatch. Your favorite shop in the mall, when we were kids, was the glass blower shop." She listed off absent-mindedly.
Belly thought about that for a moment. "That's— thank you?" She said in a questioning tone while letting out a small laugh. "I'm really glad you got into NYU."
Jo shrugged. "I didn't have any faith in myself when I applied." She muttered. "But, hey, maybe following your gut is smarter than following your brain." She whispered, her eyes slightly drooping.
"Yeah, following your gut is important," Belly whispered.
"Insanely," Jo replied before knocking out.
•••
THE NEXT MORNING THE teens packed all their things and were now standing outside the summer house on the wooden and old dock taking their yearly group picture.
The five smiled wide and Jo did bunny ears on Steven's head which made Laurel, from behind the phone, laugh.
"Say cheese!" Laurel said.
"Cheese!" They yelled together with large smiles.
"There. You wanna see?" Laurel asked after snapping a few photos. The six gathered around the phone together, cringing and laughing. Steven flicked the side of Jo's head when seeing the bunny ears making her hit the back of his.
With that they began walking back to the house, Jo next to Steven while Conrad was with Laurel and Jere was with Belly.
The blonde girl stared ahead of her at the Conklin
that was laughing. She let out a sigh.
"You gonna tell her?" Steven asked.
Joanna looked over at him, shaking her head which made him laugh. "I mean, I'd like to." She said. "I just... I don't think I should."
Steven sighed, "look, a couple of days ago, I would've begged you to stay away from her, all right?" He stated. "And I would've probably threatened you with physical violence if you ever hurt her again."
This made Joanna laugh.
"That doesn't mean I'd actually do it." He clarified quickly. "I don't fight girls. I just want to put the thought out there."
"Oh, oh, okay Steven." Joanna nodded with a furrow of her eyebrows. "I know you wouldn't fight a girl, but I'd deserve it."
Steven nodded with a chuckle. "But today..." the two stopped walking. "I just can't wait to go home and see Taylor again." He said.
"Okay, okay. We get it you have a happy relationship." She rolled her eyes and went to walk away.
"No, no. I'm just..." he grabbed her wrist to stop her. "Saying this to show that people change."
Joanna looked over at Belly, watching as she pushed Jere and got shoved in reply.
"If you love her, dude, tell her how you feel," Steven said, patting her shoulder before walking ahead.
•••
JOANNA WOULD BE LYING if she wasn't some type of relieved she wouldn't have to be around Belly anymore.
Not that Belly was being annoying or anything like that, but simply because she was tired of seeing her and Jere interact.
And then, all her plans to listen to music and read the whole car ride came crashing down.
"Jere, Joanna, Conrad! I'm coming with you!" She yelled, running toward them with a tray of coffee, courtesy of Laurel.
Joanna's smile dropped and she sighed, putting her headphones in one of her ears and walked over to Laurel, arms opened wide. "Bye Laur," Jo whispered, letting the woman hug her. "Thank you so much for everything." She said while hugging.
Laurel pulled away and smiled, "of course, Jo." She said, cupping the girl's cheek. "I'll always be here. You're never gonna forget her." She pointed at the heart necklace around Jo's neck and a single tear slipped from her eye which Laurel wiped away with her finger.
"Well?" Jere began as everyone gathered into a circle. "How soon can we get back here?"
"I'm free any time, bro," Steven spoke up.
Belly nodded, "yeah, uh, and volleyball camp's not happening." She said. "So I'm good too."
"My only friends are you guys, so..." Joanna said awkwardly making Steven smile.
"I have to go to Stanford for orientation," Conrad began, "but I could probably get back here by The Fourth... maybe? The Fourth."
There were nods of agreement all around.
Then quietness fell and the group gave suggestive looks toward Belly who instantly understood what they meant. "No. no! We don't have time. No, no." She claimed.
"Can we?" Steven asked.
"Please?" Joanna added. "For old-time sake."
Belly paused before slapping her hands to the side, "fine." She gave in.
The group celebrated and threw their bags down, Jere and Steven grabbing Belly's legs while Conrad and Jo held her up from her arms and torso.
"Belly flop! Belly flop! Belly flop!" They chanted, walking to the pool and standing beside it.
"All right, here we go." Conrad muttered as they began to rock Belly back and fourth.
"One... two... three!" They let go and Belly went flying in. Jere ran back and did a canon-ball dive, and Steven followed with a classic canon-ball.
Conrad ran in with a simple jump while Joanna lined herself up at the edge of the pool before back-flipping into it.
•••
THE FOUR DRENCHED KIDS climbed into Conrad's car, Conrad not letting Jo get in till he laid a towel across the back seats.
Belly and Jere climbed into the front seats and Conrad made a face, "You're not gonna put down..." they ignored him. "Whatever." He muttered.
Joanna got into the seat behind Belly's while Conrad took the one behind Jeremiah.
"You have to live with the consequences of your actions." Belly laughed.
"I'm just saying, a towel wouldn't kill you." He muttered, buckling up.
"I'm just glad I wore shorts," Jo muttered, slamming her hands on her jorts/shorts.
And with that, they exited the driveway of the summer house and started their journey to Brown.
Joanna took out a book, Daisy Jones and The Six, and plugged a headphone in, pressing shuffle on her Summer House playlist. Magnum Opus by cnzfnz came on and she slightly smiled.
I didn't know that we would
get this far
You should've told me what
we'd be
This house is colder than
a year ago
But the cold remembers me
•••
IT WAS QUIET IN the car as they drove on the freeway, Joanna still reading while Conrad studied a seat away from her.
A shiver came from the passenger seat and Jo glanced up.
"You cold?" Jere asked.
Belly shook her head, "no, no." She denied. "I like it chilly."
Joanna sighed, focusing back on her book as she reached underneath her to her bag and grabbed her NYU hoodie, and tossed it onto Belly's lap.
"Oh, thank you," Belly muttered as Joanna focused back on reading, Leray by Trippie Redd played softly in her ears.
There was more silence and then Belly became restless. "Okay, I'm gonna play something."
Joanna groaned, "let me have the aux. I have the best music taste ever." She said, putting her bookmark on the page she stopped on and leaning her head onto Belly's seat.
"Nope!" Belly said, clicking her phone.
Free Fallin by Tom Petty started to play and Joanna fell back into her seat with a groan as the song began.
"I'm trying to study," Conrad advised.
"She's a good girl. Loves her mama." Jeremiah and Belly began to sing. "Loves Jesus. And America, too." Not even Jo's headphones were going to block out this monstrosity. "She's a good girl. Crazy about Elvis. Love horses."
Joanna looked over at Belly with a soft smile. "And her boyfriend, too."
The beat dropped, and the two in the back joined in. "Now I'm free! Free fallin'."
The two in the front laughed as the song continued and Conrad shook his head, getting back to the studying at hand. "Fuckin' idiots."
•••
THEY DROVE UP IN front of Brown, Conrad got out and left the other three in the car.
Joanna rolled down her window and leaned out of it, "you got this!" She put out a hand. Conrad high-fived her.
"Yeah, it's cool if you don't, but I think you do." Belly smiled.
"Thanks, you guys." Conrad smiled. "See you around."
Jere nodded, "yeah."
And with that, Conrad walked away towards the school.
"So, what do you guys want to do?" Belly asked as Joanna leaned on the middle console, between the two.
"We can go to Finch." Jeremiah suggested. "It's, like, fifteen minutes away from here." He said.
"Bells, aren't you going there? Maybe?" Jo asked.
Belly smiled, "yeah, yeah." She looked into Jo's eyes, "I can't believe you remembered."
"I told you, remember everything about you." She tapped her head before sitting back in her seat.
•••
WHEN ARRIVING AT FINCH Joanna split off from Jeremiah and Belly, not wanting to third wheel in any way.
She found herself aimlessly walking around campus, just looking around and people-watching.
"Hey, you seem lost." A girl said from behind Joanna, making her turn around. "I'm Alex." She put her hand out, and the blonde connected hers to it.
"Hi, I'm Joanna." She smiled, "but, uhm, no I'm just looking around." She shrugged as their hands separated.
"Oh, are you coming here next year?" Alex asked, hugging her books close to her floral top which complimented her dark tan skin well.
"No, actually." Jo laughed nervously. "I'm going to NYU."
Alex's face lit up, "really?!" She asked. "Me too! I'm transferring after finals." She informed. "I didn't know anyone else who was going."
Jo smiled, "well now you know me." She stated, "do you want my number? Maybe we can hang out sometime?" She suggested.
The ravenette instantly nodded, "yes, please!" She said in an excited tone, pulling out her phone and passing it to the blonde who quickly added a contact for herself.
"Just text me whenever! I'm not busy all summer until orientation." She said.
"Jo!" The blonde turned to see her brother and Belly running over with smiles. "Who's this?" Jere pointed toward Alex.
Joanna motioned to Alex, "this is Alex. She's going to NYU next school year, like me." Alex waved at the two. "We both don't know anyone else going... so it's kinda like fate?" She turned to Alex, seeing if she would agree.
"Yes. Fate exactly." She smiled, "but I gotta blast, finals and all that. It was nice meeting
you—" she side-hugged Joanna who gratefully accepted it, not taking notice of the slight discomfort it gave Belly who shifted on her feet. "—we will hang out soon?" She said as she began to walk away.
"One hundred percent!" Joanna gave a thumbs up and Alex smiled, waving one last time before disappearing into the large Finch building.
•••
"I'M GONNA GO FIND him!" Joanna said excitedly as she hopped out of the car, not even letting Jere put it in park.
Joanna jogged through the campus, having been there so many times she knew where to go, and stopped at the large front doors where Conrad was to exit from taking his exam.
She hopped on one foot, then on the other with anxiety running through her veins.
The boy came stumbling out of the school, instantly seeing Joanna. He smiled at her and raised up both his thumbs, "are you ready to visit me in California?" He asked.
Joanna squealed and ran up to him, giving him a large victory hug. "Holy shit! You did it!" She celebrated as they began to walk down the concrete sidewalk. "Oh, my god! Connie, this is great!" She celebrated. "We can go to California for trips and see your school. Oh my god, surfing in California! Can you imagine—"
Her breath caught in her throat and her legs suddenly became rooted to the ground and she couldn't move.
Her heart dropped to her feet and her head began to hurt as she watched Belly and Jeremiah make out on top of Conrad's car, Belly still in her hoodie.
Her hoodie.
Joanna's NYU hoodie.
Water slightly gathered in her eyes but she sucked it up and wiped her nose, glancing at Conrad who seemed slightly shell-shocked himself.
What false hope.
marley speaks !
#number1jeremiahhater
if ur team jeremiah ur INSANE.
HOW ARE U TEAM JEREMIAH?
like explain it to me in depth how u support that lurking blue-eyes psycho cheater PLEASE