*the picture above will be referenced*
LAYTON
"Don't you look cute," Gemma complimented. "Are you trying to impress anyone special?" she smirked.
I had just gotten to Anne and Robin's house. I came through the back gate as soon as I got here because I'm basically a part of their family. I had walked straight through the gate and to the huge backyard where there were people everywhere and instantly found Gemma.
I also don't know why she thinks I look cute. I'm literally wearing black biker shorts with an oversized white t-shirt. I even found a pair of black sunglasses to complete my outfit. I'll take any compliment I get, I guess. It makes me feel better about myself.
I need that reassurance some days and others I don't need it at all, but today is a day when I don't feel 100% confident in my skin, so I appreciate her compliment even though I don't necessarily think I look as good as she says.
"Yeah at your parent's house," I said, rolling my eyes and hoping she got the sarcasm. "I was hoping to impress your cousins and uncles," I rolled my eyes.
Every month, if we're all not too busy, we try to get together at Gemma's parent's house. I mean we as in myself, my step-brother, my dad, and my step-mom. We all like to come over to Anne and Robins for either brunch or dinner. We were like one big family and have been doing this since Gemma and I were little kids and became best friends. It's one of my favorite traditions that we do.
Usually, it's just both of our immediate families, but occasionally I have some cousins or my grandparents join us. The same goes for Anne and Robin's family. Today, it was just my immediate family while Gemma had a lot of her extended family over. I would find it odd if I didn't know any of them, but we've been doing these kinds of get-togethers like this for as long as I can remember. I know all of them and they all know my family as well.
"I guess I should've thought about where we were before I asked my stupid question," she smiled. "While we're on the topic of you trying to impress one of my relatives, can I set you up with-"
"No," I stated. "You're not setting me up with anyone, especially anyone you're related to," I explain.
"I promise you'll like this one,"
"Not happening," I stated.
"And why not?"
"What? Why I don't want you to set me up with someone in your family or someone in general?" I asked to clarify.
"Both,"
"The last few guys you set me up with were absolutely awful so I don't want to go through that again even if you think you can redeem yourself," I began. "And the family part of it all just seems wrong to me. Do you know how awkward it would be if I began dating someone in your family? That seems so weird, I couldn't do it," I shook my head.
"Even if it would be weird, I would eventually get over it," she shrugged. "I want you to be happy and if that's with someone I'm related to then I would get over the initial weirdness and how awkward it could be,"
"I would feel wrong to do that," I said. "I understand that you would be okay with it in the end but I don't think I could do that to you or your family,"
"What? Be in a relationship with someone in our family?" she asked. "I'm sure everyone would love it. Imagine you being with someone in my family, you guys get married and then we could officially be family. How awesome would that be!" she said, instantly getting excited about the thought of that insane possibility.
"I'll admit that yes it would be cool if we could actually be considered family, but the chance that I date someone in your family, and get married to them is slim. There is also a chance that we could break up and then your whole family would hate me,"
"That's why you don't think about that possibility," she shrugged.
"How about this," I began, second-guessing what I was about to tell her. "If I don't have a boyfriend within the next month or two I give you permission to set me up with whoever you want to whether their in your family or not. But this will be the last time you set me up with somebody, got it?"
"I got it," she nodded, smiling from ear to ear. She seemed way too happy about my offer.
"We're done talking about this now," I said. "I don't want to talk about my failing love life, it's sad," I admit.
"I'll begin my search for who I'm going to set you up with. Because it will be my last chance, it needs to be a good one," Gemma explained. "It's a good thing I know you so well and what your type is. I'm going to find you your future husband. I hope you're ready," she said, getting all giddy.
"Whatever," I rolled my eyes. "I'm gonna go to the restroom and then get some food. I'll meet you back out here soon," I smiled.
"Alright," she nodded, turning her body to begin talking to my stepmom.
I walked toward the sliding door that was at the back of their house. I opened it and walked through the kitchen and towards the downstairs bathroom. I have come to know this house like the back of my hand. I knew the whole layout of the house like I had lived here my entire life. In a way, it felt like it because if I wasn't at my own house, I was here with Gemma. The same goes for Gemma.
I knew where all of the plates and bowls were in the kitchen. I knew where I could find Anne or Robin if I wanted to talk. I knew where the extra blankets and pillows were if I ever needed them. I even knew where the so-called junk drawer was. And I knew that I could come over here anytime I needed to or wanted to. I was their family.
I've always felt at home here whether or not Anne, Robin, or Gemma were here. I could be here by myself and feel at home.
I finished up in the bathroom and washed my hands. I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled. I actually liked the way I looked today. I guess what Gemma had said helped me. I exited the bathroom, shutting the light off behind me.
After leaving the bathroom, I walked down the hallway that lead to the two guest rooms that were in the house. The guest room at the end of the hallway to the right was considered my room when I stayed here, but I rarely used it. Anytime that I stayed the night here, I was always in Gemma's bedroom. We didn't like our sleepover to ever end, so we slept in the same room to make it last longer. I smiled at the thought of our many sleepovers.
I say slept as if we actually fell asleep. Most times we stayed up until the early hours of the morning talking, playing random games, or giving each other horrible makeovers. It was fun for us.
It makes me sad to remember those times because we haven't done that in years. I mean, we obviously hang out as much as we can with what our schedules allow, but we don't really do the other things. We're adults now so we talk about our life problems and how we can help the other fix them or heal from them. We've really changed a lot over the years.
I came down this hallway because I wanted to reminisce on everything. Anne covered both of the walls in the hallway with many pictures. I'm talking like there is barely any room on the wall for more to get put up. There are family pictures of the four of them. Anne, Robin, Gemma, and Harry. There's even some with Desmond that is up on this wall.
I was surprised when I first noticed that I was even on this wall many years ago. The one time that I actually slept in the guest room I looked over and saw a photo of Gemma, Harry and I playing in the treehouse that's still in the backyard. I stared at that framed photo for at least five minutes until Anne saw me and came to talk.
"Are you looking at the treehouse photo, Lay?" she asked, resting her hand on my left shoulder. "That's one of my favorite photos, honey. I loved that day. I watched the three of you play outside for hours. You brought pillows and blankets up there because you wanted to sleep outside for the night. It didn't last long because you kids heard a noise and got scared. You ran in the house so fast. You three never tried to convince me to let you guys sleep outside again," she laughed as she recalled the memory.
"Why do you have it on this wall?" I asked, looking over at her.
"What do you mean?" she was really confused by my question. "This is my family photo wall, I thought you already knew that, hun. We may not be blood-related, but you are a part of our family,"
I really wanted to cry when she told me that. I always felt like they were my second family, but as soon as she said that, I knew for a fact that they really were my second family.
"This is the last place I thought I would find you," I heard from behind me. "Gem told me that you were inside getting some food and here you are down the hallway, not close to the kitchen," he chuckled.
"Did you forget that I have ADHD? I get distracted from time to time, you should know this by now, H," I laughed. "Shouldn't you be in Los Angeles or something? Making music like the popstar you are," I asked, finally turning around to look at him.
"I can take time off from that, you know," he smiled. "I love seeing my family so I thought, 'Why not go home?'" he shrugged.
"Did the little british boy miss his hometown?" I teased.
"I did, yes," he nodded, laughing at my teasing him. "Which photo is your favorite?" he asked, nodding towards the wall I've been staring at for quite some time.
"The treehouse one is my all-time favorite," I smiled, looking at the photo once again.
"Weren't we like 8 or 9 and Gem almost 12 or 13?" he asked.
"I think so," I nodded. "I also love the photos of you with your long hair. How dare you cut your hair," I playfully scold him.
"It was time for a change," he shrugged. "It was getting too long for me to manage it anymore, so it got chopped. I didn't realize I had that many fans of the long locks of mine,"
"As much as I wish you still had your long hair, I'm glad you donated it. It was very kind of you," I smiled as I began leading him into the kitchen. The place I was supposed to go after the bathroom.
"Are your parents here? I haven't seen them yet," he asked, beginning to walk behind me.
"They're gonna be here a bit later, but Silas is outside with one of your cousins I think," I answered, eating some of the chips that were set out. As soon as I took one bite, I realized I had yet to eat today.
"That doesn't surprise me one bit," he laughed. "They're probably plotting something,"
"I would assume so," I nodded.
"How've you been the last month and a half? I haven't seen you in a while," He asked, sitting down on one of the kitchen stools.
"Same old, same old," I shrugged. "I've been working a lot, hanging out with Gem, or being by myself. Nothing new,"
My life really is boring sometimes. I go to work at least 5 days a week, sometimes more if they needed me. I'll go home and eat and then go to sleep to do it all over again. But I actually do enjoy it. I love spending time with the kids we watch.
"What about yourself, H? Been up to anything fun lately? Traveled to new countries?" I asked him.
"I was only in LA for a bit writing some stuff for my album, but other than that nothing too fun," he shrugged.
"And how is that album coming along? Are we getting closer to being able to hear some stuff?" I asked, hoping to hear a yes from him.
"Not yet," he shook his head. "I've been writing as much as my brain allows me to, but nothing is sticking really," he explained.
"If you're burnt out, then take a break. I hope nobody is pressuring you to write songs to put out if you're not ready. Write what you want and feel confident enough to put it out. I'm sure your fans will wait for you as long as it takes," I hope my saying this, makes him feel a bit better about the songs not turning out a certain way that he wants.
"Thanks, Lay Lay, I appreciate you saying that," he smiled. "I do have one song that I think is done and one that is almost there that you may get to hear soon,"
I instantly smiled at his statement. "I get to hear it?" I asked, not really expecting him to say that.
"I don't know how many times you need to hear it, but you are a part of the family, Layton. I promise we think of you as that and have been for years and years,"
"Thanks, Harry," I smiled. "What are the songs called?" I asked, instantly going back to our previous topic.
"The one that is mostly done is Sign of the Times and the other is Kiwi," he grinned.
"Kiwi?" I asked. "You're writing songs about fruit? Not at all what I expected," I laughed.
"I should've known," I heard Gemma say as she came inside. "Harry said he was gonna come find you but didn't mention he would keep you inside to talk," she laughed.
"I didn't realize that we had been talking for that long, sorry to keep you waiting," I apologize.
"It's alright, I was playing with Cade," she smiled. "He's a cute kid, I must admit it,"
"He may be cute and sweet when he's here, but I promise he can be a little devil at the daycare,"
"Cade would never be a little devil," Harry chimed in.
"Wanna bet?" I asked. "Go into work for me one day and you'll find out how much work he really is,"
"He's a sweet little boy," he smiled. "I'm gonna go find him, haven't seen his cute face in a long while,"
*
"I think I'm gonna head out, Gem," I yawned.
I had been at Anne and Robin's house practically all day. It was a blast, trust me, but after hours and hours of doing endless activities, eating, and talking with everyone, I was exhausted. It was nearing almost 11 at night, so I had to get home so I could get some rest. I work tomorrow so I need to get a few hours of sleep.
"C'mon, stay a little longer," she begged.
"I work tomorrow, I can't," I yawned yet again.
"Stay here then," she proposed. "I still have some clothes here and I bet you might as well. Instead of going all the way home to sleep, just stay here,"
"As much as I would love to stay here, I can't. I want to sleep in my own bed tonight," I answered. "We can make some more plans just the two of us for sometime later this week, I promise,"
"Alright, fine, fine," she finally gave up on trying to convince me to stay here at her parent's house. "Invite Adrian and Skyler though as well. I don't want them to not feel welcomed at all,"
"Are you sure?" I asked, just to make sure it was something she was serious about.
"I wouldn't suggest it if I wasn't sure of it," she nodded. "We haven't hung out, the four of us in a long time. I don't want them to think that I'm stealing you from them. Invite them to hang out with us. We can go to the mall, get something to eat, or do something that they want to do,"
"Alright, I can do that," I smiled. "I'll see what day we all have off and then we can plan something,"
"Ok," she nodded. "Text me the details of everything,"
"I'll do that," I nodded. "I'm gonna go say goodbye to everyone and then I need to leave, I'm tired," I yawned yet again.
"Text me when you get home, please," Gemma requested.
"I will," I said, leaning over to give her a hug. "We'll hang out soon," I pointed to her as I began walking through the backyard to say goodbye to the remaining people who were still there.
"Layton, honey, are you finally joining us?" Anne asked as I made my way over to the fire.
Anne, Robin, Harry, Silas, and Cade were all by the fire talking. To my surprise, they are the last ones left. I would've thought for sure that Silas and Cade would be gone by this time, but I guess they wanted to stay a bit later than usual.
"I came over to say goodbye, I've gotta get home and go to sleep," I explain. "But thanks for having me over again, I had a great time," I smiled.
"You're welcome here anytime, honey," she said, getting up to give me a hug.
"Bye, sweetheart," Robin said, also giving me a hug. "It was nice to see you again,"
I looked over at Silas and saw Cade fast asleep in his lap. That part didn't surprise me because it was way past his normal bedtime. The thing that did surprise me was that he wasn't in Harry's lap. Anytime that Harry is around and Cade sees him, he'll stick right to him the entire time. It was very cute.
"Are you bringing Cade in tomorrow?" I ask Silas, turning my full attention onto him.
"Ellie is gonna be bringing him in tomorrow. She works early so it'll be on her way," he told me. Ellie is Silas' wife of 4 years.
"I haven't seen her in a long time, I'm excited to see her then," I smiled. "Hopefully Cade will be a sweet little boy tomorrow. I can only handle so much," I laughed.
"I'll tell him to be extra good then tomorrow, just for his favorite aunt,"
"Thank you," I nodded.
"Do I get a goodbye or do I get to be ignored?" I heard towards Silas' right.
I looked over and saw Harry playfully pouting in his chair.
"I don't know if you deserve a good enough goodbye," I started. "You always seem to leave the country and I only find out when I see you get noticed somewhere,"
"I never know my full schedule, I'm sorry," he said, getting out of his chair. "I promise I won't forget to say goodbye next time,"
"You better not," I laughed, giving him a hug.
"Go home and get some sleep," he said softly in my ear. "Hopefully I'll see you sometime soon,"
"Bye guys," I said, after pulling away from our hug. "Maybe I'll see you next weekend or something," I smiled as I waved to all of them.
"Bye honey, get home safe," Anne said. She's always been so caring towards me.
"I will, I promise. Bye," I said for the final time before making my way out of the backyard and then toward my car.
*
It's so relieving to get home and take your shoes off after a long day. There will never be a better feeling in my opinion. Maybe it's actually getting into bed after being on your feet all day. Either way, one of those two is the best feeling for me.
I go into my closet and start opening drawers. I grab out a pair of shorts that I wear to bed religiously. They are always my go-to. I take off my biker shorts and exchange them for the pair I just grabbed. I opened another drawer and took out a sports bra. I took off the shirt and bra I wore today and put the sports bra on in replace of that.
Yes, I sleep with a sports bra on, sue me. I find it very comfortable. I also don't usually like wearing a shirt to bed, but I feel like I need to be covered so a sports bra is my next option.
I leave my closet to quickly text Gemma before I forget about it. I don't want her to panic about me not getting home safely.
Message To: Gem
I got home about 5 minutes ago. I had a great time at your parent's house. I hope to see you later this week with the girls. Love you <3
I plugged my phone into the charger before I set it down on my nightstand. I need to go brush my teeth and wash my face before I get into bed for the night. It will only take me about 5 minutes, but because of how tired I am, it's going to feel much longer than that.
I drag myself into my bathroom that's connected to my room and begin brushing my teeth. As much as I hate doing this, I have to. I quickly brush my teeth and use some floss and mouthwash before I begin to wash my face.
Just one last step before I can climb into my bed. The thought of being in my bed and under the covers sounds like complete heaven right now. It's exactly what I need right now.
I dry my face and put on my moisturizer. I shut the light off in my bathroom and my room before I turn on my lamp. I get into my bed, pull the covers over my body and sit against my headboard. I grab my journal and pen off of my nightstand and open it up to the next empty page.
I started writing in my journal about a week ago. So far it's really helped me keep my thoughts together and help me keep my mind in order. I didn't think it would help as much as it has. I'm glad I began doing this for myself, but some days it feels like a chore to sit down for a few minutes every day to write down everything that's happened in the day or in my mind.
Gemma told me that she was going to find me, my future husband, today. I don't know if I should feel relieved, scared, or sad. I don't know.
I feel relieved knowing that she's going to find me someone and I don't have to work for it.
Scared because what if she thought he was the one for me, but in reality, he isn't? That would crush her.
I feel sad because maybe I just can't do it myself. Am I that bad? Am I unattractive to every male that crosses my path?
Gemma told me that she knows my type. Tall, brunette, good-looking, and loves his family.
I can already see her vision for me.
She wants me to settle down, get married, and have kids. She wants me to find a nice home with at least 2 stories, a beautiful kitchen, the most stunning backyard, and plenty of room for future children.
What if I let her down?
The thing that I want the most is to find a man that will love me for me. Somebody who will love me when I'm in a crazy, playful mood. Somebody who will love me when I'm in my most awful mood where I don't want to see anyone. Just someone who will love me in general.
I want my person to be my home.
I don't want my home to be a house. I want it to be a person. A person I can always rely on. A person I can look up to. A person that is always there for me.
That's what I want.
That's what I hope to get.
-Layton
-17th June 2016
-Age 21