Day Seven
Morning
It felt like waking up with a bad hangover.
That was the best way Cole could describe it.
His head was pounding from the events of the day previous.
Cole thought he would wake up and it would all be fake. He'd wake up and be next to Alli, not on the couch beside his snoring brother and his sister who was so curled up into her boyfriend he could barely see her.
He rubbed the bottoms of his palms against his eyes, adjusting to the light. Taking a deep breath, Cole tried to walk himself through the day. Maybe he would be so occupied with the wedding that he could just avoid Alli. Honestly, he'd probably barely even see her. He knew the girls had to be at the bridal suite in the next bit to get ready while the guys were in charge of distracting Nate. Maybe he could use it as a way to distract himself too.
Cole quietly stood up from the couch, glancing at his siblings to make sure he didn't wake them. He really didn't feel like them asking any questions right now. He may have gotten a free pass that night, but that likely expired by now. Slowly turning the doorknob, he winced at the creek of the door. Before he could turn around to check, he was out the door.
Trudging out to the hallway, he eyed his hotel room door with dread. Maybe Alli was already gone for the day. It was around the time the girls would be heading down to her room to start the day.
But then before he could consider going to check, another hotel door opened, as if they were waiting for his to open.
"Cole? Honey? Heard you were looking for me."
Relief flooded his body in a way he didn't anticipate at the sound of the voice. God, he just needed to talk to his Mom. Turning around, Cole gave her a weak smile, waving loosely in greeting. "Hey, Mom."
"Come here," she suggested after a beat, nodding her head towards the inside of her room. "Matthew is gone getting us coffee."
Cole narrowed his eyes. "How long has he been getting coffee for?"
His Mom grinned slightly. "Told him I was dying to try a coffee shop that was a thirty minute walk away. Sent him off about twenty minutes ago. Figured that would give us enough time."
"You didn't have to do that," Cole said, slightly embarrassed as he walked into her hotel room, head tucked down.
"Would you have come in otherwise?" Lorena asked with raised eyebrows.
Cole winced. "Probably not."
"Probably not," she agreed swiftly, closing the door behind him. Lorena sat down on the edge of the bed, patting the seat next to her. Cole strolled over, sitting down on the spot.
He felt terribly exposed as he felt his Mom's gaze pouring into him. Clearing his throat, he asked, "So, you sleep well? Big day."
"What's going on with you?" Lorena asked instead, eyeing him carefully.
Cole huffed out, leaning forward and placing his elbows on his knees. "Nothing, I'm good."
"Sam texted me a selfie of him with you sleeping on their couch in the back," Lorena admitted, flipping her phone around to show said picture. Cole gawked at the photo. True to her word, it was Cole sleeping on the couch with his siblings and their boyfriends posed in front of them. At least they weren't treating him any different. Cole decided to take the win where he could.
His mother didn't say anything else as she slipped her phone back into her pocket, staring at him expectantly. Cole didn't even know where to begin. Everything just fell apart in ways he didn't ever imagine. He didn't know how to pinpoint the first thing that went wrong. There were obvious standout moments to mention, but he wasn't even sure if it would all make sense without proper context.
Cole thought back to the final events of last night with Matthew. The whole thing had been nagging at him. He couldn't help but feel bad. How could he not? He bit the dude's head off for wanting to make his Mom happy. His Mom was the most important person in the world to him. He took that for granted sometimes. Cole had to know if things were as serious for Lorena as they were for Matthew.
So, instead of diving right into things, Cole decided to start off with another route. "Do you love Matthew?"
She gave him a gentle smile. Lorena didn't miss a beat with the change, answering with a simple, "I do."
Cole licked his lips unsurely, hesitantly asking, "Like... like you loved Dad?"
He wanted to take it back as soon as he asked. Cole felt a jolt of panic rush through his body, wondering if he crossed a line. But his mother didn't look bothered. She had a thoughtful look on her face as she leaned forward towards Cole. It was almost as if she thought about it herself before, which she probably had. He couldn't imagine what a complicated thing it had to be for her. If it was hard on him, he presumed it was something that she had thought about before.
"I don't think I'll ever love anyone like I loved your Dad," Lorena told him softly, choosing her words carefully. "It's a different kind of love. It's a bit like how you have different stages in your life. I'll always remember my relationship with your Dad to be something... something I won't get with anyone else. It was the kind of love not everybody finds in their life."
The look on her face changed as she spoke. Cole couldn't describe it, but she looked truly at peace, something he rarely saw with his mother. "But what I have with Matthew is what I need. He takes care of me in a way I didn't realize I needed until I met him. Sometimes... I like to think your Dad sent him to me."
Cole instantly wanted to kick himself. He had been a dick to this guy who was making his Mom happier than he had seen her in years. All this guy wanted was to make his Mom happy. And Cole was treating him no better than gum on the bottom of his shoe. Cole's head dipped down, clenching his jaw tightly.
"I didn't really... realize that," Cole admitted stiffly, the guilt eating at him. But Lorena wasn't having that. She reached forward and took Cole's hand into her own.
"I get where you're coming from, it was weird for me too," she added, tilting her head down to meet his gaze. "To be honest, if I had it my way, Matthew wouldn't have come early for the trip."
He raised his eyebrows at the admission. "Really?"
"Really," Lorena confirmed with a wry laugh. "I told him as much, and we had a talk. I knew it would be a lot at once for everyone. I'm not sure if you noticed, but sometimes his enthusiasm clouds his judgment."
Well, that explained the fucking engagement ring. "Yeah, kinda picked up on that."
Lorena laughed heartily, startling Cole. She placed her hand on her chest, an amused look on her face. "Oh, honey, do you think I don't know about the engagement ring?"
Cole's head jolted towards his mother in shock, which only made her laugh more. "You do?"
"Of course I do, no one gets anything past me," she explained, waving a hand dismissively. "I found it days ago, and I told him he was out of his mind if he thought this was a good time to propose."
"And... and what did he say?" Cole asked, shifting his body to face her.
"He said he didn't plan to, but he bought it the day he met me and had it on him since," Lorena said with a fond expression on her face. "Said he always carries it."
Cole scoffed but still smiled at the anecdote. "That's cheesy."
"That's Matthew," Lorena corrected with a grin.
He couldn't help but smile at the look on his mother's face. Cole couldn't recall the last time she looked so content and at peace. Lorena took care of all of them like it was as easy as breathing. She deserved to have someone take care of her too. And it seemed like they really got each other. She talked about Matthew with this certain of fondness that was endearing. And at least she knew he was sort of ridiculous.
"Now do you want to tell me what's going on?" Lorena asked knowingly, giving him pointed look.
Cole grimaced, wishing the conversation could've ended with that. "You weren't kidding about not getting anything by you, huh?"
Lorena gave him an apologetic look as she asked, "What happened with you and Alli?"
And that was when the dam broke.
Cole had been holding it in, thinking that crying about it wouldn't fix a thing. But he couldn't go on like that. Tears rolled down his face as every secret and every lie he told burst at the seams. Something about the way she just knew. Cole didn't know what it was about her just knowing that just cut deep. Maybe he wanted someone to pick up on the fact that he wasn't okay. That things just weren't going well.
And so, Cole told her everything.
Everything.
The fights. The divorce. The baby.
Everything.
It poured out of him and once he started, he couldn't stop. The look on Lorena's face made him want to get everything out. She didn't interrupt him. She didn't react or try to interject her thoughts. She just listened. It was nice to just be heard. His mother was always good at listening. A skill that seemed easy but was hard to be genuine with. It came naturally to her. She just let him talk.
"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" Lorena asked softly once Cole had seemingly finished. "I could've tried to help you, honey."
"I just, I wanted to give Scarlett a good day," Cole explained, blowing out a harsh breath. "I didn't want to throw this at her right now. At any of you."
She considered her words carefully. "It sounds like this has been going on for some time."
Cole squeezed his eyes shut. "I think I just liked the idea of not adding more to your plate. I didn't want you to have to worry about me."
"Need I say how it's my job to worry?"
"But I don't want you to, I don't like feeling like you're worrying about me," Cole admitted as leaned backwards. "You shouldn't have to share my shit. I can carry it."
"The world does not rest on your shoulders," Lorena said firmly as she placed a hand on the side of her son's face.
"But... Dad would've wanted everyone to be taken care of," Cole retorted, shaking his head slowly. Lorena took a moment to think for a moment, pulling her lips in.
"Our family has gone through a lot," she started in a gentle voice, her eyes squinting slightly as if picturing it. "I know you want to protect them, but it's okay to let them take some of the weight. Family exists to bear the burden with you. No one is meant to go through life alone. You put so much on yourself." She placed her hand on her chest, saying, "Let us help you carry it."
Cole dipped his head down, a tear dropping on his hand connected with his Mom. She placed her other hand over both their hands, giving him an encouraging smile. "I'm sorry you were carrying this alone for as long as you were."
"I'm sorry too," Cole apologized. "I shouldn't have lied to you about all of it for this long."
"Oh, you can lie to me," Lorena said teasingly, "but I'll just know you're lying every time."
Cole barked out a laugh, rubbing his hand over his face as he shook his head. She wasn't lying either, because she always knew when he was either lying or when something was eating at him. She knew it with all of him. It was probably some sort of mother's intuition thing if any of that was real. But she always could just tell.
"So... you're gonna be a father," Lorena started, knowingly prodding.
Cole felt a strange rush of emotions, swallowing thickly. It hadn't hit him like that yet. To hear it from someone like his Mom. "Yeah, I am."
She tilted her head at him. She was testing the waters. Cole knew if he said he didn't want to talk about it, she would let it go. Not forever, but for now. "What do you think of that?"
"I- I don't really know," Cole admitted, eyes narrowing. "I've always wanted to be a Dad. But I don't know if either of us are really ready for that. I mean, we were ready to sign divorce papers last week."
"You were never ready to sign those papers."
He didn't miss a beat. "I would've if it made Alli happy."
"And that's why I know you're ready," Lorena told him with a grin. "Putting someone else's needs before your own is what being a parent is. That's always come naturally to you."
Cole let out another breath as he rubbed his hands together. "Is it fair to bring a baby into this mess?"
"Into a family who will love it endlessly no matter what happens next?" Lorena corrected without missing a beat. "I think that sounds like a pretty good deal to me."
"Yeah," he agreed, blinking rapidly. "I don't... do you think Alli and I can work things out?"
"I can't tell you the answer to that," his mother said apologetically. "But what I can tell you, is that I've never seen you look at anyone like you look at Alli. I'm not sure if you remember... but you used to say..."
Lorena trailed off, a gentle laughing slipping from her mouth. Cole furrowed his eyebrows together in concern. "Do I even wanna know? Is this just gonna embarrass me?"
"No, no, it's sweet," Lorena assured him, placing a hand on his shoulder with a smile. "When your Dad taught you about the stars... you started saying that your love for Alli was like a constellation. You learned that constellations didn't just go away. Stars might die... but the constellations somehow always stayed. You said that was how you felt."
Cole paused. "Damn, I really said that? Little me was sort of poetic."
"You always were when it came to her," she agreed, slowly nodding. "My point is, you knew that no matter how many things happened, your love for her would always be there."
He couldn't help but smile at that. Cole still felt those words. Even after all of this... he couldn't help but love her. He was pretty sure he would always love her. No matter what happened next. Even if the stars died, his love would still be there. Permanently in the sky. But he had to admit, there was one thing about that story that was nagging him.
"Do constellations really work like that?" Cole asked skeptically, eyes narrowed in thought.
"Not really," Lorena admitted with a shrug, a fond smile still on her face. "But it was so sweet, we couldn't tell you otherwise."
˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗
"I figured we'd go golf or something today."
Cole hummed in agreement with his younger brother as the esthetician smoothed the cooling face mask across his skin. The groomsmen were all sat in a calming room with Nate, splayed out in lounge chairs. Nate had booked them all facials for the morning of the wedding while Scarlett's bridal party were getting their hair and makeup done for the day.
He remembered her bridal party was going to meet in Scarlett's room at around nine in the morning. By the time he left Lorena's room, he was knew he wouldn't run into Alli in the hotel room. He took a quick shower and got everything he would need for the day before heading out to meet the others. Cole couldn't think about everything right now. Today was about his sister and Nate. He could give them today.
Nate hummed, shrugging slightly in response. "Not really my thing, and I figured this wasn't the day to try something new."
"How you feeling about today?" James asked him, squirming as the mask was spread across his face. Cole had to give credit where credit was due, the boy was clearly hating every minute of this. But he didn't complain even once.
"I'm feeling good, really good," Nate gushed with a whimsical look on his face. "I can't believe I'm getting married. I can't believe who I'm marrying too, I mean she's perfect."
"Perfect is a stretch," Sam added instantly from besides Cole. "She can be sort of dramatic sometimes."
Cole gave him an incredulous look. "She can be dramatic sometimes?"
Nate sighed dreamily. "Nah, that doesn't matter, she's everything."
"All right, save it for the vows," Cole said teasingly. Though he wouldn't say it out loud, he really was happy his sister found someone who adored her.
"Helps I have all of you here, too," Nate added fondly, looking around at everyone in the room. "Really appreciate you all being here."
The final two people of Nate's wedding party had joined them this morning. Cole quickly met them at the rehearsal, but his mind was pretty occupied. Cole was pretty sure they were the group that opened for him on his first tour. They had taken off since then, but the three got close during the tour. The guitar player, Brett, was laying beside him, and Cole was pretty sure he had fallen asleep ages ago. The lead singer, Elena, was on the other side of Brett. She was really enjoying the pampering. She had a glass of champagne in one hand and a croissant in the other. She was meeting up with the girls afterwards to get ready, but since she was part of Nate's groomsmen, she wanted to start the day with him.
Nate's parents, Roy and Henry, were also with them, enjoying the morning. Cole loved Nate's Dads, they were hilarious. They had spent some holidays with them before and they were two of the funniest people Cole had ever met. They knew how to throw a party too. Scar was telling him how they helped during some of the wedding planning when she asked them to. Which meant, it was gonna be a damn good party.
"Always, dude," James said happily, unable to stop leaning away from the estheticians touch. "Hey, when do these things get taken off?"
Nate grinned, oblivious to James' plight. "Not for another fifteen minutes, pretty awesome huh?"
"So... so awesome," his brother huffed out as his Dads laughed at him a few chairs down.
A couple hours later and everyone was in their tuxes. Nate looked like he was about to pass out at any given moment. Everyone's ties were perfect and there wasn't a hair out of place. Cole felt pretty good, except for the fact that he had battled with his hair for the better part of an hour. Of all days for him to struggle with it, it had to be the day it counted. But after a bit, he was able to get it into a good place. It was good timing too since they were about to head over to where they were meeting everyone for pictures.
The reality of the day seemed to hit Nate when the assistant photographer came to their room. She took photos of them getting ready and of them with their facials. The main photographer was over with Scarlett and her group, getting groups photos of the girls and detail pictures of her dress. Cole remembered that from his wedding, they were some of Alli's favorite pictures.
Cole was trying to mentally prepare himself to see Alli. He hadn't seen her since last night. He still had no idea how to talk to her about all of this. Obviously, this was not a good time to talk about everything. Cole knew he had to act like nothing was wrong. It was what he had been doing this entire past week. He could do this. Everything would be fine. He could keep pretending for a bit longer. His family could still have the perfect day.
He suddenly remembered what his Mom told him about not everything in the world riding on him. But today was an exception. It had to be. This day wasn't about him. It was about his sister and Nate. He had to snap out of his thoughts and turn his attention to be solely on the day ahead.
Cole clapped his hands together, turning to Nate who's smile was getting bigger by the minute.
"All right, ready to get married?"