"Forever and ever, kid, until you're sick and tired of seeing me." Marie Lu, Legend
----
XLIV.
Adam cleared his throat, and anyone near him could hear that he was shaky. The emotion and gravity of the day was most definitely affecting him, and Perrie could not help but look upon her beloved father with tears in her eyes.
"I would ask everyone to please charge your glasses." Adam lifted his own goblet of champagne as he looked to Perrie and Joe, who sat beside one another now as husband and wife.
Every member of Perrie's family lifted their glasses in anticipation.
"I never wanted this day to come," Adam began simply. "I never could have imagined parting with my first-born child, with any of my children, and feeling any sort of good emotion surrounding the occasion. In fact," Adam laughed as he recalled, "I once joked to Grace that I would dress in mourning attire if ever I were compelled to attend the wedding of one of my children."
"He did," Grace confirmed from her chair beside Adam. There was a rumble of laughter that followed.
Perrie, herself, did not laugh. She stifled tears as she looked upon her father in his brilliant new coat, which was most definitely not for mourning.
"I have made a point, both Grace and I have, to raise our children differently. And in doing this, we have actively encouraged traits in Perrie that would have been extinguished in different circumstances. Perrie," Adam looked down upon Perrie then, and she sucked in a deep breath to try and stifle her tears. "Your temper is fearsome, and your heart is as deep as the ocean. You fight fire with fire, and you know not how to do anything by half. Your passion and your tenderness are a credit to your will, and anyone who has the privilege to be loved by you is a lucky man indeed. I am immensely proud of who you are, my dear one. And to know that you are happy is all I need in order to stand here today and make this toast."
Perrie was uncertain if her father had finished his toast, but she could not remain in her chair any longer. She abandoned it with such haste that the chair fell over backwards and made a very loud crashing noise on the floor. Nevertheless, Perrie threw her arms around her father, who promptly sloshed his champagne over his own chair owing to the force of Perrie's hug.
"I love you, Papa," Perrie declared, her voice muffled as her face was pressed into her father's lapel.
Adam chuckled quietly. "You have no comprehension of the love I have for you, my dear girl."
A few moments later, Perrie released her father, and he lifted his nearly empty glass once more. She returned to her seat, where Joe tenderly took Perrie's hand underneath the table. His thumb brushed over her knuckles soothingly as Adam's attention turned to Joe.
"Joe," he began, clearing his thick throat once more.
Perrie felt her husband stiffen beside her. The thought of Joe as her husband startled her almost. It was odd how quickly she had gotten used to referring to her once mortal enemy as such. But Joe clearly had not expected to hear something especially for him.
"I could threaten to kill you if you hurt my daughter, but I am fairly certain Perrie has that side of things well handled." Animated laughter once again filled the ballroom, which had been staged with food laden tables, and chairs for all of Perrie's family members to occupy.
Joe, too, laughed, and Perrie grinned sheepishly. Joe squeezed her hand.
"No, but in all seriousness, I never thought I could part with my daughter for anyone. I never imagined be able to part with any of my children. I never thought I would have to, seeing as I would need to give my permission, and no man would ever be enough to deserve one of my precious daughters.
"I think everyone in this room knew of you before they met you." Another rumble of laughter confirmed Adam's suspicion, and Perrie, once again, grinned guiltily. "I will never forget Perrie's first day of school when she stormed out declaring that she'd made an enemy." Adam smirked. "I knew of the boy you were, but in getting to know the man you have become, I came to understand that you are a man of great integrity and resilience. You have honour and compassion and are truly the only one who can match Perrie's spirit. I greatly admire you, for who you are in times of trouble, and for the humour you find in the everyday. The decision I have made to trust you is one that I know I will not regret.
"There is no one else I could ever imagine deserving our Perrie. I pray you live your lives with a deep appreciation for where you have come from, and a great excitement for what the future may hold. I am proud to call you my son. To the bride and groom."
"To the bride and groom." The toast echoed throughout the ballroom as glasses were charged and champagne was consumed.
Music played jovially as the wedding breakfast was enjoyed by all, and Adam quietly shook Joe's hand as the dancing began, reiterating that he had meant every word of his toast.
Perrie then pulled her new husband onto the dance floor, and they took their positions amongst the couples and they began to dance. There was no sequence kept. There were not aristocrats present to impress with one's grace and lightness of foot. Everyone simply twirled and spun around with their partner, laughing as they did.
There was such a joy in simply dancing, and Perrie's heart swelled when she saw that joy upon Joe's face. Gone was his guard. Gone was any semblance of his burdens. The demons were nowhere to be found in that moment. He was free from pain and sadness, and he was happy.
"Do you know, I almost changed my vows," Joe informed Perrie as he spun her around, lifting her at the waist. The fan of Perrie's skirt whipped into her Aunt Cressie's, who was simultaneously being spun by her Uncle Jem.
"How?" Perrie asked with a frown. "Why?"
Joe grinned. "I thought the 'I take thee Peregrine Edwardia Beresford' line was a little formal. It took everything in me not to say, 'I take thee Little Imp Beresford'. The only thing that stopped me was I was certain Reverent Thomas would keel over and die from exhaustion at us both if I did." Joe sniggered.
Perrie gasped, though she smiled, devilishly amused. How that horrid nickname had once made her blood boil. Now she found herself wishing that he had used in place of her given name at their wedding. "Be careful, Mr Parish. Do not make me threaten to drown you in the pond. I will do it, you know."
Joe smirked as he placed his hands on Perrie's hips again, lifted her up effortlessly as he twirled her entirely out of the rhythm of the music. "Do your worst, Little Imp," he teased. "Or would you rather I call you Mrs Parish?"
That was the first time that Perrie had heard her new title aloud. Perrie Parish. She said the name a few times over in her head, and she could not decide if it went or not. Were there too many 'r's'? "Why didn't they call me 'Mary' or something plain?" she mumbled to herself. "There were about four thousand 'Anne's' at Mrs Liscombe's. I was the only Perrie."
"What was that, Little Imp?"
"Don't you think 'Perrie Parish' sounds odd?"
"No," Joe said immediately, shaking his head vehemently. "That is the name of my wife. She may be an odd little imp, but her name certainly is not."
Perrie rolled her eyes, but she could not hide her burgeoning grin. "Your wife is an odd little imp, is she?"
"Absolutely," Joe confirmed. "But I would not change," Joe kissed the top of her head, "a single hair," kiss, "on your head." Kiss.
Perrie pursed her lips as she looked up at Joe. "I will allow you one 'Little Imp' a day. You must choose wisely."
Joe nearly snorted. "One 'Little Imp' an hour, you say? How generous of you, Mrs Parish."
He bent down to scoop Perrie up once more, and this time he held her so that they were at eyelevel, brown meeting blue.
"I don't ever want to forget how you look right now," Joe whispered.
"Please don't. I'll be old and wrinkly one day and you will have to remember why it was that you married me in the first place," Perrie quietly teased.
"Oh, my darling imp, your looks had nothing to do with that decision. I am tremendously attracted to women who have a desire to kill me," he stated simply, before he gently allowed her back down onto her feet as she laughed. "I just don't ever want to forget how you looked on the day you became my wife."
***
Joe had meant what he had said to his father in the church earlier that day. He was determined to forget him. And he had not given his father one single moment more on that day as he enjoyed simply being beside his wife.
His wife. Would he ever get used to that? Would the notion of it always bring him the thrill that it did now? Joe was, indeed, optimistic. He had spent so much of his life in darkness. Perrie was the sun. She was also a blaze of fire and temper and passion, but she was his sun.
Joe loved to dance like this with her. It did not matter that he could not hear the music half of the time. There were no rules but them.
He was not certain for how long they had been dancing when Adam had approached them both, but by the look on the duke's face, Joe was suddenly brought back down to earth from where his head had been in the clouds. Adam was clearly not there to deliver another toast that could warm his soul.
Adam appeared quite startled, and that look put Joe on edge immediately. "I am sorry to interrupt you both," he began, "but I have just been informed that two uninvited guests have just arrived, and they are asking to see you and your brother."
"Guests?" repeated Joe. "Who are they?"
"A Mr and Mrs Heywood," replied Adam. "Are they known to you?"
Joe had never heard that name before. Ed might have, but he certainly had not.
"They are insisting it is important, but if you should wish it, they can be sent away. It is a private affair, after all."
Why on earth would a couple who he had never heard of be insisting on an audience with Joe and Ed? They had to be known to Ed. Joe's curiosity was piqued, however, and he looked around the room for Ed, spotting him nearly immediately in a jovial conversation with Perrie's Uncle Jack.
"Do you mind?" Joe asked Perrie. "If it is important, I will see what they want. They must be acquaintances of Ed's." Joe suddenly wondered if they had some connection to the Molly house. His nerves increased as he wondered if it would be wiser to meet with them alone. But that sacrificial way of thinking was not helpful, and he knew it was also unwise.
Perrie nodded. "Of course. I will be right here."
Joe waved Ed over. He caught Ed's attention quickly, and his brother excused himself from his conversation. He joined Joe on his way out of the ballroom with a look of confusion on his face.
"Where are we going?" he asked as they followed Adam out of the ballroom.
"A Mr and Mrs Heywood have arrived asking to speak with us both. Do you know them?" Joe asked him quietly, in a tone that he hoped would let Ed know that Joe would support him whatever the consequences of this meeting would be.
But there was no recognition on Ed's face when he heard the name. "No. I have never heard of any Heywoods," he replied with a frown. "What on earth sort of day is this to call upon a stranger? Don't they know there's a wedding going on?"
Adam led Joe and Ed to the drawing room, the music of the ballroom now very faint. The butler was waiting at the door, and as soon as the three gentlemen approached it, it was opened for them. Adam entered first, followed by Joe and Ed, and it did not take long for them to spot Mr and Mrs Heywood standing beside a window, huddled together.
They were an older couple, perhaps in their sixties or so. Mr Heywood's hair was thin and silvery, while Mrs Heywood's hair still retained a rich auburn colour. They both appeared to be a bundle of nerves, and they held on to one another as though they might fall over if they stood alone.
Whoever they were, they were dressed finely, their attire detailing great wealth. They were groomed immaculately and, despite their age, looked to be in excellent health.
"I am the Duke of Ashwood," Adam said, introducing himself. "This is my house, and we are holding a very private family affair today."
"We are sorry to intrude, Your Grace," Mr Heywood said apologetically, still holding onto his wife's shoulders. Mrs Heywood's focussed gaze was fixed on Joe and Ed, her dark eyes flicking between them both with anxious speed. "My name is George Heywood. This is my wife, Mary."
The name 'Mary' startled Joe a little, it being one of the names that he had caught Perrie mumbling to herself as she had fretted over her new name.
"I assure you that we would never call upon anyone like this, unannounced, and unintroduced, were it not a matter of vital importance," Mr Heywood continued.
"We ... we saw your name in the newspaper!" Mrs Heywood suddenly blubbered, rather shrilly, and without any decorum.
Joe, for one, would never care for decorum, but being a lady who looked rather like someone Cecily might be friendly rivals with, he never would have expected such a display of emotion.
Mr Heywood tightened his grip on his wife's shoulders and hushed her rather tenderly.
"I beg your pardon?" Adam seemed to move slightly to stand in front of both Joe and Ed. He, too, seemed startled by the odd display from this perfect stranger.
"Forgive my wife, Your Grace," Mr Heywood said with a sense of pleading. "Might we sit and explain?"
Adam gave him a reserved nod, before gesturing to one of the drawing room's settees. Once Mr and Mrs Heywood were seated, Adam, Joe, and Ed took their places on the opposite one. Mrs Heywood's hands were shaking, and her eyes had not stopped darting between the twins.
"I saw that there was no knowledge of us in either of your faces when I introduced myself and my wife," Mr Heywood directed his assumption at Joe and Ed. "I can understand why."
"I'm sorry, should we know who you are?" Ed asked, perplexed.
"I saw it ... in the newspaper!" Mrs Heywood cried again, this time her brown eyes filled with tears. "You're alive, her babies, you're alive!" Mrs Heywood burst into tears before she turned into her husband's shoulder, and Mr Heywood comforted her sincerely.
Before Adam could launch another protest, Mr Heywood interjected. "Please, Your Grace. This has been a very, very trying time for my wife and I." Taking a breath, he said, "We once had a child ourselves, our only daughter. And she was married briefly to the Viscount Evesham," he revealed, saying the name of his son-in-law like it was a devil word. "Anna. Anna Heywood was her name."
Joe only knew two facts about his mother.
She had brown eyes, and her name was Anna.
He had stopped breathing by the time Mrs Heywood had managed to lift her head, and when Joe met her eyes, he saw his own. His brown. Ed's brown. Their mother's brown.
"You're alive!" Mrs Heywood blubbered. "I can't believe it. You're grown. You're alive."
"When were we dead?" Ed managed to relay in disbelief.
"You are the twins' grandparents," Adam realised at the same time. "My goodness."
"Yes." Mr Heywood nodded, his voice shaking with the gravity of the situation. "Yes, we are their ... we are the twins' grandparents." His pale eyes flicked between Joe and Ed as he smiled almost nervously. "Your mother was our daughter. Our Anna."
Joe was still frozen to the spot in shock, but Ed was not. "When did we die?" he demanded to know once more.
"A few months after your birth," Mr Heywood replied simply. And though his reply was a statement of fact, there were ghosts in his eyes that gave an insight into just how harrowing a time it was for him.
Mrs Heywood whimpered at the memory. "He said you died. He said that you both died."
Mr Heywood rubbed his wife's shoulder. "Your father was a horrid gambler and burned through much of Anna's dowry before you were even born. We had established a trust for her firstborn son when she wrote to us telling us she was with child. Anna was optimistic and she had hope for what her lout of a husband could be, rather than what he was. I only wish I had stopped her."
Mr Heywood cursed himself, and it was obvious that he had cursed himself many times over the last two decades.
"Your father wrote to us demanding more money to cover his debts, and we refused. The next time he wrote to us was to inform us that Anna had died giving birth to twins, and unless we agreed to hand over another sum, we would be barred from her funeral.
"Mrs Heywood begged me to pay, but I would not. I would not be extorted. I would grieve my daughter in private.
"I was angry. I am still angry, but I was angry when he wrote again, and my anger influenced my decision as to what happened next. He wrote demanding money for the children. In my anger, I refused. I knew he would gamble it away before it could be spent on a single rattle. I wrote back refusing to help him in any way despite my wife's begging. I knew that it would affect our ability to meet Anna's sons, but I thought that in time we would be able to take them in. I could never have anticipated what would be inside the next letter."
Joe knew immediately what his father had done, and it did not surprise him one bit. He was a master of punishment in the evillest of ways. It would have been so easy to hate him for this. Yet another example of what he had taken from Joe, and from Ed. But Joe had made a decision to cease hating him for his own benefit, and it was not easy.
Mr Heywood, clearly, had not forgiven John Parish. "He wrote back saying that both of you had caught a fever and had died." Mr Heywood was clearly the more composed of the two, but his voice completely broke upon saying those words.
Adam covered his mouth in shock at the revelation, as Ed lamented, "That bastard."
"Like fools, we believed him," Mr Heywood admonished himself. "It was not until we read your name in the newspaper, Joseph ... whichever of you is Joseph ..." Mr Heywood paused solemnly, as though he deeply regretted that he did not know the difference between the twins. "Please, tell me which of you is which."
"I am Joe," Joe said, finding his voice.
"And I am Ed."
"Joe, Ed," whispered Mrs Heywood, connecting their names to their faces as she focussed her intent, yet emotional, brown eyes on them both. She appeared as though she was trying to memorise their faces, and to spot any differences that would help her know which was which.
She ought to ask Perrie. How she did it, Joe did not know. But Perrie knew it was Joe. Perrie knew him.
"Joe, Ed," Mr Heywood repeated as well. "We saw your name, your wedding announcement, in the newspaper, Joe. It was right there in black and white. Your name, who your father was, where you hailed from, your brother, everything. You were alive. You never died, neither of you."
There was silence in the drawing room for several minutes as the revelations of the past twenty or so minutes settled upon the four and a half sets of working ears in that room.
Joe's mother had almost always been like a phantom to him. She had been like a ghost, an untouchable angelic innocent who had vanished, died, because of him. And despite the fact that he had felt responsible, and been held responsible, for her death, Joe had never had any connection to her. He had nothing tangible, not even a memory. And yet he had always craved it. He had craved connection, and so had begun his torture and jealousy of Perrie upon seeing how beloved she was by her mother and father.
But now, sitting before him, were two very real connections to his mother. Somewhere, sometime, in the last twenty years of his life, Joe had accepted that he had no family beyond Ed. They had only each other, and so being welcomed into Perrie's family was a blessing, even if they were bringing nothing with them.
But they had something. They had someone. Two someones. A grandmother and a grandfather.
"It is our dearest hope, boys, that you can find it in your hearts to forgive your grandmother and I for not discovering the truth sooner." Mr Heywood broke the silence with his shaky request. "And Joe, I hope you can forgive us for bring you this news on your wedding day. We knew no other way to find you. And we offer our most sincere congratulations. We hope to make the acquaintance of your bride if you would allow it one day."
Joe had been sitting there and letting every revelation wash over him, but it was not until he heard the nervous apology of his grandfather that recognition struck him. Mr Heywood bore the burden for a sin that was not his own. He sought forgiveness for something he had not done, and yet he carried that weight most keenly.
Perhaps Joe was not at all like his father as he had once thought. Perhaps he was like his grandfather.
"We are victims of our father no longer," Joe said vehemently. "I put him behind me today, as did Ed." He looked to the side, and Ed nodded in agreement. "You have suffered because of him, too, and you bear no responsibility for his sins."
"You do not need to seek forgiveness from us," Ed added.
"But we should have raised you! You're Anna's boys. We should have looked after you!" Mrs Heywood protested, her voice riddled with guilt.
"We looked after each other," Joe returned softly. "We are well. We are safe"
Ed got up off of the settee and walked around the small table to kneel before Mrs Heywood. He leaned forwards and collected her in an embrace, and Joe could see that this was exactly what their grandmother needed. She was in a fit of sobs as she clung to Ed as though he was her reason for being. But not a moment later, she threw one of her arms up, and beckoned. "Please, please, Joe! Please come here."
Either she had remembered which twin was which, or she knew, but either way, she knew that Joe had remained behind. But not for long. It was a nerve-wracking this to approach his grandmother, but the minute he felt her arm wrap around him, it was the most natural thing in the world.
Despite the fact that he could feel her rivers of tears, it was the very first time that he had ever felt a maternal embrace that had belonged to him.
"Anna's boys. My boys," Mrs Heywood kept repeating as she squeezed them.
Joe felt the light smack of his grandfather's hand on his back as Mr Heywood joined the embrace in a gentlemanly way.
When Mrs Heywood finally released them, but only so far as to look upon their faces, she remarked, "Oh, you're so like your mother. You both look so much like her," she gushed, her eyes red and watery.
Questions began to swim in Joe's mind, and he imagined Ed was thinking the same. They knew nothing about their mother. They had never been permitted any connection to her. And before them now was an infinite pool of answers. Before them now was family.
Joe felt incredibly lucky then. Behind him, observing the whole interaction, was Adam, who had given Joe the blessing of what it was to have a father. And now before him was the opportunity to know his mother.
"We know that this was an inconvenient time to call," Mr Heywood commented sadly, "but we had to make ourselves known to you. We know you must return to your celebrations, your bride, but might we have your address so that we may write to you both?"
"You can certainly have our address," Joe confirmed, "but you simply must stay for the wedding breakfast. I would like for you to meet my wife."
"You would?" Mrs Heywood replied excitedly, finally releasing Joe and Ed. "I bet she is wondering where you've gotten to."
Joe mused, "If I know my little imp, she is listening at the door."
"I am not!"
Perrie's voice sounded through the keyhole of the drawing room door, and all five occupants turned their heads. There was a bang against the door, and Joe knew that Perrie had deliberately thrown her head against the door in frustration at giving away her position.
The drawing room then erupted into fits of laughter as Perrie sheepishly opened the door. She skulked her way inside, and waved awkwardly, glaring daggers at Joe for laughing at her.
"Greetings," she murmured. "Those keyholes get awfully dusty sometimes. It needed a good cleaning."
"Ah," Joe nodded his head while grinning wickedly. Just when he did not think he could love her any more than he did, she surprised him.
"Look at the size of her," Mr Heywood commented without guarding his thoughts, "I could fit her in my pocket."
Joe snorted rather violently, "Please try!" he laughed as Perrie placed her hands on her hips.
"I can see the family resemblance," she snapped, though she could not hide her smile. "Tell me, Mr Joe's Grandfather, how well do you swim?"
----
I hope you liked it!! One mammoth penultimate chapter! We're finally here! Epilogue will be up next, and then we will have to say goodbye to my beloved Fiery Dalliance.
I am so going to miss this story, but I know I'll come back and visit, as I hope you will! Perrie and Joe have been such a joy to write. Adam is just my dream dad. Ed is my dream brother. This family is just my fantasy. I fill them with drama and trials and struggles, but at the core of it, this series is always about a family who love each other and will go to the ends of the Earth (literally, looking at you Adam and Susanna) for each other.
You'll find that in all of my stories. I love writing about families, and this one has quickly become my favourite. When I'm finished with them, I will be so sad.
But it makes me so so so so happy to know that they have brought you some happiness too.
I will get the epilogue up as soon as I can, and then we'll be moving on to Miss Lily. I'm so excited for her story, and to introduce you to who I have planned for her. Her story has been about 18 months in the making. I just hope you'll love it!
I hope you all have a fabulous weekend. I need to get some sleep. I've been writing this for about 6 hours so I'm cooked!
Vote and comment xxx