Three hours have passed, Becca is still lying in Freen's room, her back facing the bedroom door. She was actually very hungry before, she hadn't finished breakfast yet, but how else,, Becca chose to endure her hunger rather than approach Freen first.
Freen actually went back and forth to see Becca, but never got to her. The first time, she came with Becca's unfinished breakfast, then stopped when Becca said hiss in an annoyed tone, apparently Becca was talking to herself at that time. Freen stopped her steps and turned around, she finally cleaned up the food and kept Becca's breakfast in the cupboard.
Then after cleaning the dirty dishes, Freen returned to her room with warm tea, but stopped when she saw Becca slightly kick Freen's blanket. For an instant, Freen thought she was going to be kicked like that blanket. Freen went back outside and kept the hot tea next to Becca's breakfast. Then Freen sat down on the sofa again, she was looking for a way to be brave enough to meet this sulky white woman, she was really worried seeing Becca like that.
Freen was back inside now, after a moment of thought. She brought a light snack in a plastic bag, when she entered Freen was surprised because Becca was now sitting with her back to Freen. And it seems that Becca's back sure looks up and down with anger. Freen slowly stepped back, she actually still doesn't understand why she should be afraid to face Becca, or because of that little slap earlier? Don't know.
Freen sat down on the sofa again, she was still looking at her bedroom door. She wished Becca would come out, and eat her breakfast. Or, talk to her.
But three hours had passed, Freen didn't want to wait anymore. She finally went in and saw Becca there. It turned out that Becca was fast asleep.
Freen sat on the edge of the bed, she sighed. She even dared to smooth Becca's hair that covered her face with her left hand, Freen didn't want to be given a silent treatment like this, she couldn't stand Becca being silent like this.
Quietly, Freen kissed the edge of Becca's lips, only briefly, not pressing them. And suddenly Becca woke up, she said, "Freen?" Becca seems surprised by Freen's behavior now, but she also feels like it was just a dream.
Freen was still sitting there without saying anything, she was still playing with Becca's hair. With that caress, Becca felt sleepy again. And finally, Becca pushed Freen's hand away, she was reminded of the previous problem. Becca sat down and slightly away from Freen, now Freen saw Becca's back.
Freen sighed again, she didn't know what to do with this angry woman, moreover Freen didn't know why. Then she said in a low voice, "Becky, don't be like that. Look at me." Freen means, turn your body towards me.
But Becca curtly replies, "I'm blind."
Freen shook her head in disbelief, she didn't mean to see the real meaning, then Freen finally got on the bed and sat in front of Becca. Their knees are close together. Freen ignored Becca's anger, she held Becca's cheeks with both hands, then pressed and pulled her gently, Freen played with that sullen face. Becca avoided Freen's hand again, she didn't want her serious mode to be messed with by Freen.
Then out of nowhere that question came from, Freen suddenly said, "Becca, you've never been curious about my face?" Freen just wanted to find the atmosphere.
Becca was still pouting with that slightly extinguished anger, jealousy wasn't as big as this morning. She didn't answer anything.
Freen smiled, because she saw Becca's eyebrows slightly raised, it was a sign that this white woman was also curious about Freen's question. She said again, "I have a birthmark on my forehead, like a thunderbolt." Freen hoped Becca would say something.
Becca finally said, still curt, "You think you are Harry Potter?"
Freen chuckled, she was relieved that her words were answered, "I also have a mustache, quite thick, and my eyebrows are together, thick too. " Freen saw Becca's response again, Becca's eyebrows furrowed as if she couldn't believe it all.
"You're kidding, right?" Becca seems worried by Freen's words. She had never thought about how Freen would look.
In a slightly offended voice, Freen replied, "So you thought I was pretty all along?" Freen's words reassure Becca.
Becca, who felt doubtful, finally raised her hand and touched Freen's face. Starting from the birthmark that Freen mentioned, the fused eyebrows, and the thick mustache. Everything she groped slowly, and Becca did not find it all. Finally Becca pinched Freen's cheek tightly, it made Freen scream. Then Becca said with exclamation, "Feel it! You lied to me."
Freen stroked her cheek, she never thought she would be pinched so hard. Then Freen muttered under her breath, "If only I wasn't a gentlewoman, I would pinch back." Freen glanced at Becca sharply. She meant what she said.
Becca laughed sarcastically, she said, "Ha! Gentlewoman ? You're a playgirl, Freen!"
Freen frowned, thinking a bit, then she said, "You believe Rose's words?"
Becca just kept quiet, she didn't turn her back on Freen anymore. She was actually secretly happy with this closeness and the conversation that was taking place, at least Freen approached her, she also thought twice about kissing the corner of the lips, Becca felt that Freen really did it while she was asleep.
Freen exhaled lightly, she said again "She's my best friend, we never dated." Freen explained briefly while watching that face again. Then she said, "And, even if that's true, you shouldn't be angry. You're not ready to accept someone else's heart." Freen said this in a sarcastic voice.
Becca's brow furrowed, her hand searching for Freen's belly, she wanted to pinch her again. But Freen quickly dodged. Freen also laughed proudly because she managed to avoid the pinch, but apparently had to stop laughing because Becca threw the pillow in her face. Freen groaned, "Becky!" With a long i sound.
Becca was laughing now, she didn't expect the shot to hit Freen right in the face.
Hearing Becca's laughter, Freen finally smiled happily, she finally made Becca's mood cheerful again. Freen approached Becca, then said, "Let's have breakfast first, your stomach is still empty until now. Hm?" Freen held Becca's hand, she pulled slightly so that Becca answered what she said. Becca just followed Freen's words without answering anything.
_____
Becca, who is eating, only hears Freen's grumbling.
"Freen, stop. I'm eating." Becca couldn't stand Freen's chatter about her being angry for three hours, she also said that Becca shouldn't have listened to Rose's words. The reason Freen was annoyed was seeing her cold tea and Becca's breakfast which looked awful. But Becca still ate it, she said the food was still delicious, she can't see it anyway.
Freen sat across from Becca. She hasn't stopped talking since before, she knows this isn't good, but what can be done, Becca has to listen to her complaints. Food must be eaten when it is warm, moreover the Microwave Freen doesn't work.
Freen watched Becca finish her breakfast, then she cleared the plate and quickly cleaned it up. Becca was still sitting at the dinner table, she was waiting for Freen to finish her work. Then suddenly a cold hand took hold of her hand, and asked her to stand up. Freen made Becca face her now.
Becca didn't know what Freen was doing, she only felt Freen's hand still holding her left hand.
Freen just stared at this woman, she suddenly remembered when Becca's eyes were moist this morning. She finally thought, why is Becky crying if she doesn't have any feelings for me. It was with that in mind that Freen finally worked up the courage to ask, she deliberately made Becca stand up to look at that face directly. "Have I ever made your heart skip a beat, Becky? Because I always have." She looked at those eyes again, then asked again, "Do you like me with all your heart, Becky?" It's about moving on.
Hearing the word all your heart made Becca afraid of something, she suddenly felt doubtful about the answer this time. Really, Becca wanted to say it outright, but the answer stuck inside her. Becca was silent for a long time, she tried to answer Freen's question, but couldn't. And, suddenly Becca panicked when Freen released her hand and walked away from where she was.
"Freen." Becca called out to Freen, she took a deep breath. Finally picked up the cane on the table, and walked over to find Freen. Becca looks for her in the room, and she can feel Freen there. Because, Freen sighed quite heavily. Then she said while standing up "Freen, I'll answer it. And, I'm the one who should be angry, why are you angry too?" Becca doesn't want Freen to be like this.
Becca already clearly knows Freen's feelings. Also , with Freen saying that Rose lied to her, Becca's heart is suddenly light and normal. She felt relieved and was able to smile again. Now, Becca wants Freen to know that she also likes Freen in her own way.
Slowly she looked for Freen's whereabouts, it turned out that Freen was sitting on the edge of the bed, she slowly pulled Freen's hand. She made Freen stand facing her, just like Freen did before. Freen's hand that she was still holding, finally placed on her chest, Becca said softly "What's the answer?" Becca wants Freen to find out the answer herself.
Freen's palm could feel how strong the heartbeat was, but Freen was still Freen, she still questioned Becca's feelings if this woman didn't say it clearly. "I don't know." Freen withdrew her hand, she didn't want her question to be answered by a question either.
Becca sighed, Freen sure is stubborn. Then Becca said again, "Kiss me." For Becca this way Freen knows that she really has feelings for her.
Freen seemed to be looking for a something else, she said, "No." Freen just wanted a clear answer, she was that kind of person. One plus one equals two, not answered with other questions.
Becca was about to run out of patience, she was annoyed, "Why?" Freen was silent.
Freen feels that Becca has her own reasons for not expressing her feelings clearly, but on the other hand, Freen feels that Becca seems hesitant to give her that heart.
Becca felt Freen's ragged breaths, she said again, "Answer me." Becca didn't want to be angry anymore, but Freen baited her into it.
Freen looked at those eyes again, she finally said "Tell me clearly, is that heart for me?" do you really like me? Freen just needs clarity, if Becca can't give that simple answer, Freen won't start any kind of relationship. If this was about someone who had previously been present in Becca's life, and this woman wasn't completely over him, Freen didn't want to get involved, she wanted to secure her heart.
Becca answered again, she said, "You've felt it." For Becca, feeling that heartbeat was enough to answer Freen's question.
"You don't want to say it directly? Are my questions too difficult?" Freen still insists on her principles.
Becca seemed to be challenged, but she couldn't answer the question clearly. Becca finally quieted down.
Freen, seeing Becca's silence, said, "Don't force it if you're not ready to accept me, I can wait, Becky." Freen's words were sincere, she was prepared to wait until a certain time.
Becca was annoyed, she even bit her lip a little, she didn't want it to end like this. Finally she said in a slightly snapping voice, "Why are you like this Freen?! You can feel it, can't you? I kissed you too!" Again, Becca doesn't want to say I like you, Freen directly or My heart really wants you. She chose another phrase, which Becca said meant the same thing.
"I know!" Freen answered her in the same tone.
Becca felt another feeling raging inside her, she really didn't want to pass up this opportunity, she said angrily again, "So why you still don't accept my answer?!"
Freen was silent for a moment, she saw those eyes again. Freen said, "Because you can't really tell that you like me completely, Becky! I just need that!" Freen looked into those eyes again meaningfully, she said, "And! I can see Becky," Freen's voice returned to sadness, she said again, "The doubt is clearly written on your face." Freen was just telling the truth, she had a feeling Becca was covering something up, but Freen couldn't tell who or what it was about .
Freen said again "What makes you hesitate, tell me." Freen seemed to push Becca over the edge, she really didn't want to say why.
"....."
"You still don't want to say?"
"....."
"Okay, we'll talk later." Freen wanted to go outside for a bit, she wanted to get some fresh air.
However, when she walked away from Becca, Becca grabbed her hand. Becca quickly hugged Freen, she didn't want Freen to just leave this conversation. Freen was a little taken aback and she let Becca hug him.
"Do not go." The voice was really faint, Becca seemed to whisper.
"...."
After a while, Becca finally said, "I'm sorry I couldn't say it out loud, I'm not in doubt, I'm scared." Becca paused for a moment, she said again, now her voice was very shaky, "I'm afraid that one day you will leave me alone." By not saying all those feelings, Becca felt she could protect her heart. Suddenly it hurts, "Freen," she called out Freen's name desperately, Becca said again, now in a really sad voice, "This is all because I was abandoned in a bad way." Becca said very sadly, her chest felt tight when she remembered that, she had never felt that sadness before in months, but it suddenly came back when she said all that to Freen.
Becca couldn't hold back her heartache, she cried in Freen's arms. The heartrending cry of her listeners, she recalled all that again. She really went back to that time again, Becca's heart is so sore and hurting now. Her arms hugged Freen tightly, Freen could feel it.
Freen was silent, she felt Becca's body shaking violently because of the sobs. She hugged Becca tightly.
Freen even thought, who would dare make Becca like this? Who could bear to leave this good woman? Who would be evil to let Becca go like this? Freen couldn't hold back the tears, she cried too, but didn't make a sound . Her tears just flowed, her heart was very sad about what Becca was experiencing. She realized that she couldn't console Becca's past, nor could she erase Becca's sadness. Freen felt suffocated, as if what Becca was going through, she could feel. Because for Freen, being left behind is very painful. Either in a good way or a bad way. It's all the same.
Freen didn't stop Becca's crying, she just hugged the body with the same tight hug. She was sorry, she felt very sorry. Freen's tears couldn't stop, as if they were always there to flow, she held back the sound of crying, she felt she had to be silent. Seeing Becca this sad, Freen thought again about everything. She replayed the memory of Becca looking at the white dress with a sad look, Freen couldn't imagine if what she was thinking turned out to be true. However, Freen didn't want to ask it directly, she would only listen if Becca was ready to say all that.
Freen finally understood why Becca couldn't express her feelings directly, she understood, she tried to understand. Also, Freen accepts Becca's past, whatever it was, no matter how bad the bitter experience was, Freen hopes that her presence can calm the woman she wants. Freen couldn't bear to see Becca like this. Freen didn't force Becca to say those words again. Freen felt she had to protect Becca, always be by her side and try to heal the pain. Freen wished she could.
It took a long time for the crying to finally stop, Becca wasn't crying anymore, but she was still hugging Freen. The hug seemed to imply Freen don't leave me.
Freen never wanted to leave Becca except for one thing. Freen said softly, "Becky, if I go to faraway places again, will you come with me?" If Becca agrees, then there is no reason for Freen to leave Becca, she will always be with Becca all the time.
It was Becca who listened to the question, then said, "You accept my answer?"
Freen smiled gently, "Mm. I'll wait until you can say it clearly. And now, I can accept that answer." Freen rubbed Becca's cheek, the remaining tears really made Becca puffy.
Freen said again, "Don't cry anymore, and I'm not forcing you to tell me all that. Let's take it easy, okay?"
Becca nodded in agreement, she was smiling now. A smile on a face full of tears.
Freen finally said, "Becky, you are my girlfriend now." Freen is still Freen, she just wants to make the connection clear. She didn't even ask the question, do you want to be my girlfriend? Freen didn't want to ask anymore, that was enough.
Becca chuckled, then she hugged Freen again.
Freen was grinning widely now, then she pushed Becca a little and kissed them gently on the lips. However, Becca cried again, this surprised Freen and broke the kiss. Freen panicked, she asked, "What's wrong, Becky?"
With the sound of the tears still going on, Becca said, "I'm so happy. I thought this courtship was doomed." Becca turns out to be very afraid if in the end Freen doesn't build this relationship, her heart is upset because of that.
Freen chuckled, then she smiled and hugged Becca again "That can't be Becky. Because I wanted you from the first time we met."
Becca laughed in Freen's arms, she remembered what happened when she first met at the museum. It was so embarrassing, but today she was grateful to have met Freen, even if in a unique way.