☾• 𝐑 𝐀 𝐑 𝐄 𝐒 𝐙 •☽
When You're Sad I'm Sad || Charlie Puth
It was six o'clock in the morning and I was done getting ready for work.
I was meeting up with Yves and Lara today for the investment finalisations and contract draw-ups. It truly warmed my heart when prominent people in society acknowledged my hard work and showed their love for it.
Today, I want to bring Kamaria along with me. She was someone who had shown great interest in Viz Liquor and I knew it was genuine. She had texted me last night, informing me that she had finished the bottle of wine I had brought her the other day.
No words could explain the smile I had over my features when I heard that, nor could they depict the intense joy that bubbled within me.
For the past few months, we spent a lot of time together, visiting one another- well, mostly me but that was besides the point.
We had dinner together, watched TV shows together, went shopping together and did many other wholesome things together.
She was still quite adamant about abstaining and I respected that. She had simply given in to her desires during our date three weeks ago and I understood that.
It was very hard, though. Watching her sway her tantalising body in the most tempting ways whenever she was walking, humming or listening to some music was quite a challenge.
We kissed frequently, and that always heightened my desires, but these days I was learning to control my feelings. To introspect on why I liked Kamaria so much.
Slowly, she was becoming a part of my life. The routine of calling her two to three times a day and talking to her throughout the night until we both fell asleep on the call was my favourite.
Buying her flowers and something interesting before I popped into her apartment or the restaurant had become a habit that didn't seem arduous anymore. If anything, it helped me refresh and take my mind off things.
I still slept on the couch at her place, or sometimes, when I was extremely tired, I went to the other bedroom.
Kamaria was always the first to wake up and make me some delicious breakfast, and on the weekend, she never forgot to turn off my alarm so that I could have a good rest instead of brainstorming at three am like I always do.
For our little dinner dates in the comfort of my penthouse, she always got to pick the wine, and I always had to hold the ladder for her as she explored which new flavour she wanted to have that night. Miguel always made the five-star cuisines for us, or sometimes, we ordered from the Ricci restaurant.
Izaiah helped with my outfits and setting up the place, then Miguel focused on the meals and desserts. For a date that usually begun at six pm, they came to my place at as early as twelve pm to start prepping. I loved my boys, they were my entire life.
They always support me in everything I do and it makes me feel so loved. I couldn't have done it without them. I wouldn't have realised how much I needed to change or how Kamaria's actions were so important to build a foundation for our developing connection.
I liked Kamaria so much, so much but at that time, all I really wanted was to fuck her.
I didn't take time to acknowledge the beauty beyond her body; the beauty of her intelligent brain, the beauty of her laugh, the beauty of her smile and twinkling eyes, the beauty of her hum whenever she was in an excellent mood, the beauty of her compassionate heart, the beauty of her everything.
I loved her everything.
There was something deeper and more intimate about love, something that wasn't solely defined by sex.
It could range from how you have telepathic thoughts that bring you to do something similar together, or it could be how you can easily understand what your partner needs at a certain time. It could be a hug when they look stressed, or a kiss when they are in need of some affection.
And I was so glad that Kamaria had restricted physical intimacy before we got to know each other on an intellectual level. I could occasionally feel the pull towards her, the deep, inexplicable flutter of my heart whenever I was with her, and the inevitable misery when I spent time away from her.
These days, something as little as a cuddle excited me. I didn't feel the need to put my hand into her panties to express my love for her. Forehead kisses did a lot more than I could have ever imagined.
After eating and packing her some of the breakfast that I had made, I took some car keys from the jar then took the elevator to descend to the massive garage.
Pressing the button on the Ferrari keys, I took note of which one reacted before walking over to it and entering. The platform spiralled as the garage door slipped open, allowing me to drive out to Kamaria's place.
It took me a few minutes to get there, and I parked in my usual spot before heading up to her apartment. She had given me a key to her place and I had given her one to mine, so I simply unlocked and entered.
The place was quiet and after putting the breakfast package on the counter, I walked to her room in search of her.
Just as my hand lifted to open the door, I paused when I heard sniffling sounds. My heart pulsed and on instinct, I opened the door.
She was sitting on the bed, sobbing silently as she stared at some picture frame. She hadn't deciphered my presence yet, deeply immersed in whatever sadness she was feeling.
I slowly walked towards her then carefully settled down on the bed. Something about seeing the tears fall down her soft cheeks hurt me; I didn't like seeing her so sad, it pained me.
She finally looked up at me with glossy brown eyes filled with melancholy, and without saying anything, she got up and wrapped her arms tightly around me.
I hugged her tighter, massaging her back as she cried harder. In that moment, I felt the need to protect her and restore her joy. I wanted to eliminate all the negative energy she was feeling and make her happy again.
Most of all, I wanted to understand why she was crying.
One thing I learnt about Kamaria in the months that we've been getting to know each other is that she was so closed off. I had never heard about her family, never seen them, never heard of any siblings, never heard of any friends or anything.
Nothing.
The only friend she ever talked about was Angelina, who was apparently her best friend. I'd never met her, but she had shown me pictures of them together.
Apart from that, I barely knew Kamaria's background. As opposed to me who had introduced her to my world and was planning to bring her to my parents' place so they could meet her, she had given me nothing.
I didn't know anything about her relatives or parents, and everytime she looked worried, anxious or disturbed, she never wanted to talk.
Instead, she would ask for space. And I gave her that because I respected her feelings. She clearly wasn't ready to let me in and I had to accept that. But today, I was hoping she would share what was on her mind with me. I wanted to help her with anything I could.
I took her into my laps as her sobs got more violent, and my arms secured tighter around her, hoping the emanation of my body warmth was doing enough to comfort her in the meantime.
It seemed as though Kamaria had been holding the emotions back for so long, and she had reached a breaking point. I happened to show up and maybe she realised that what she actually needed, was a shoulder to cry on.
So I let her express it all, and I didn't want to disturb her, so I remained silent, simply holding her close, stroking her hair and kissing her temple gently.
We stayed like that for some time as she poured her emotions out until she was a little bit stable, breathing heavily against my drenched shirt.
"I'm sorry," she whispered but I hummed in disagreement.
"Don't apologise. You needed this, and I wanted to be there for you." I convinced her, my hand rubbing against her back.
"Thank you, Rareșz. This is not how I wanted you to see me-"
"Listen, Kamaria. The purpose of making this connection is to see each other at the best and at the worst, none of us are perfect and we're going to have times where we break, times where we fall but we have to learn to pick each other up, okay?" I stroked her cheek when she looked up at me with her doe, tear-filled eyes, "and I want you to know that I'm here for you. I'm here to help you pick and find your broken pieces, even in the midnight darkness. You can't do it alone, so don't be afraid to let me know you need someone to help you get through whatever is bothering you. I have feelings too, and I want to support you emotionally. Help you heal whatever scars you have, my love."
The wide smile on Kamaria's features warmed my heart and her eyes got glassy before she wrapped her arms around my neck, giving me a suffocating hug that I truly enjoyed every second of.
"Thank you, Rareșz. I don't know what I did to deserve you, to deserve your love and affection." She whispered against my neck and I chuckled.
"No, I'm the one who doesn't deserve you baby. I hurt people, I've convinced myself that I can't love, but being with you has changed my perspective in ways I could never have imagined. And I'm so grateful for you." I kissed her cheek while her face remained buried in my warm neck.
"I'm grateful for you too, Rareșz. You're the person I never thought I needed," she sighed, snuggling against my body.
I could have sworn I loved her, but it seemed to early to say. It seemed to early to be sure, and I didn't want to scare her off. What was happening to me?
What is happening to me?
"So, do you want to talk?" I was a little hesitant, and my heart dropped once again when she shook her head.
"I don't want to talk, but I want to show you. I know I've never really given you any knowledge on my life, but I feel ready now. Are you willing-"
"It shouldn't even be a question. I want to know more about my soul partner," I murmured, cupping her cheek and planting a soft kiss against her lips.
"Okay. Let me get ready,"
"I brought you some breakfast, finally mastered how to make waffles like you." I winked and she laughed in amusement.
"Well I can't wait to taste them. Did you add cream-"
"To the scrambled eggs? Yes I did, and a bit of salt and pepper." She grinned widely when I finished her sentence for her.
"You're the perfect soul partner I could ever ask for," she whispered, kissing me tenderly and I felt my heart melt right there and then.
"I know, now go and get ready. I'll be waiting in the kitchen," I squeezed her ass gently before letting her get off me with a giggle.
When she went for her shower, I picked out an outfit for her then headed to the kitchen. Things were slowly falling into place and I was so eager to know more about Kamaria.
In no time at all, she was done and she had simply stuck to her usual lip gloss and her hair was neatly tied back into a secure bun. She managed to look like an angel even after a serious breakdown.
After she had breakfast, I let her drive my car to where she wanted to take us. She parked in a free spot, and I was silent as we both disembarked and walked towards the medical building. I pulled some dark glasses on and a cap. Now was not the time to have people swarming around me.
I was a little nervous, but Kamaria was holding my hand. I didn't know who we were going to meet, but I was ready to.
After she spoke to a nurse, we walked down the brightly lit corridor. It wasn't a hospital, but a modern medical centre that clearly took extra care of their patients with special needs.
We held hands until we got to a door with the label 'Amani', her surname, signalling me that it was a direct family member.
She entered first, and I slowly followed behind, closing the door once we were in. There was a woman sitting up in the bed, having a breakfast buffet on the little table that crossed over her bed.
I took my glasses and cap off, clearly looking at her once we were closer. Her features brightened when she saw Kamaria, a little squeal escaping her lips.
"Kamaria, my sweet baby," she outstretched her hands, and I watched as they shared a warm, intimate hug.
"Mommy, I missed you so much." She whispered softly, tightening her arms around the woman's body.
Mommy...
This was her mother.
As I looked at them, they shared the same brown eyes, full lips, face shape but her mother was a redhead. She possessed a thick maine of deep red hair while Kamaria had black hair.
"I missed you more my lovely girl," her eyes averted to me, "and who is this handsome fella you've brought today? For the first time in history, you've brought someone here." She looked elated.
Something felt nice about being the only person she has brought to her mother.
"Stop it mom," she giggled before getting up to pull me closer by my arm, "this is Rareșz Vizcaino, we're together."
The expression on her mother's face was priceless. "I HAVE A SON-IN-LAW?"
"Mom please, keep calm-"
"Keep calm?! When this is the first guy you've ever introduced me to?! No ways! Oh my days God is great! My only child is finally getting married!" I chuckled when Kamaria pinched the bridge of her nose at her mother's strong excitement.
"It's lovely to meet you... uh-"
"Khadija. It's lovely to meet you too Rareșz, a hug?" She outstretched her arms and I complied, smiling that the mother had easily accepted me. Nothing was more comforting than validation from your in-laws.
In-laws, I say?
"I'm so happy to meet you, Khadija. You look lovely," I commented, taking note of how her dark, umber skin glowed. She looked perfectly healthy and fine, I wondered what was happening with her. Kamaria was lighter than her.
"Oh please, stop spoiling me. I can't wait to get discharged," she clasped her hands in excitement, but Kamaria sighed deeply.
"Not yet, Mom. You're still unstable-"
"Nonsense! I'm perfectly fine Kamaria, I'll be out soon and we can go to the park like we used to," Khadija smiled, then turned to me, "so Rareșz, do you like my little girl here?"
"I most definitely do," I nodded and she gasped.
"My heart. Kamaria here needs love, she's very fragile but a burst of life and happiness-"
"Mom, no," Kamaria whined and her mother giggled. Giggles are a family thing, I see.
"What? It's the truth. But please promise me that you will take care of my little princess? She's all I have left," Khadija gave me a solemn look.
"I promise, on my life." I assured her and she squealed again.
We spent a lot of time with her Mom, laughing and easily conversing about everything. She couldn't stop talking about seeing her little grandbabies, no matter how much Kamaria kept protesting.
We had a conversation about her favourite flowers and board games, and we actually played a chess match together. She was such a cool mom, I was so happy to have met her.
Once visiting times were over, we sat outside on the benches after buying some pastries and coffee from the little café inside the centre. I had slipped my glasses and cap back on the moment we left Khadija's room.
"I adore your mom, her happy energy is just contagious," I smiled down at Kamaria as she bit into her cinnamon roll.
"Yes, I do too. Usually, before you came along, I'd come here and spend most of my time with her whenever I felt lonely. But now I have you to occupy me," she shrugged with a smile.
"That sounds right," we both laughed.
After a while, she spoke up again, sensing that I have so many questions. "My mother hallucinates. She has schizophrenia, a-and, she has been here for the past ten years because it gets bad. Sometimes, I can't even help her. She was having such a good day today, a rare thing to witness. I haven't seen her that happy in months." The tears were welling up in her eyes and I held her hand.
"It's okay, baby. Please don't cry, at least she's safe here and you can always visit her. She's going to have more good days, I promise." I said in a comforting manner.
"I'm scared, Rareșz. The doctor keeps saying that it's not too late for me to find out if I have it too, because the gene is strong. I probably do, and I don't want to know for sure," she sobbed and I simply wrapped my arms around her.
"I understand, Kamaria. Give it time," I kissed her forehead, holding her close to me. Now I understood why she was crying. And it was perfectly normal to fear the unknown.
"I do feel like I'm hallucinating sometimes, but I'm not entirely sure I'm schizophrenic. The doctor wants to run tests to check if I do, but- but I'm not ready. I don't want to do it Rareșz." She hiccuped sadly.
"You don't have to do it if you don't feel prepared. Just give it time, and once you feel ready, you can do it. If you want me to accompany you, I'll do it. Just be patient with yourself, okay?" She nodded with a smile, hugging me tighter.
"You're the best soul partner I could ever ask for, Rareșz." She sighed happily. Her words alone made me feel special.
"You are too, the only soul partner I could ever need." I kissed her softly and she giggled against my lips.
"How about I reschedule my meetings and spend some time with you? At your apartment?"
"No-"
"Yes. I want to make sure you feel better, Aria," I whispered, earning a giggle from her upon the new nickname.
"I love the sound of that. But your penthouse, I love how comfy your bed is," she enthused and I smirked.
"Of course, anything for my queen."