Jamie gripped the glass in her hand as she saw three men walk through the door. She grimaced; she knew everyone in the small, desolate town. But these were strangers, and Jamie was wary. Two of the men, the tall one and the with the trench coat, went to sit down. The shorter one approached the bar.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted.
“Don’t call me sweetheart,” Jamie replied sternly.
“Woah, woah. Calm down. I just wanna order a drink.” The stranger put his hands up defensively. “The name’s Dean, by the way.” Jamie continued to glare at Dean. “Can I just get three beers?”
“Sure,” Jamie consented. She got three beers out of the cooler and popped the lids off. She handed them to Dean, and he swaggered off to his friends.
“Took you long enough,” the tall one commented under his breath as Dean placed the drinks on the table in front of them. The man with the trench coat chuckled lightly. He enjoyed watching the two brothers argue.
“Shut up, Sam,” Dean shot back. “Blondie up there wasn’t taking the charm.” Dean winked flirtatiously at the man in the trench coat, joking with him about a secret they had. He didn’t know that the man’s heart fluttered at the sight.
“Well... Your charm certainly works on Castiel,” Sam said. Sam wasn’t surprised; he had suspected that Cas, as they liked to call him, was attracted to Dean. And everyone knows that Sam had been questioning Dean’s sexuality for a while.
“Oh, I know,” Dean said with a sly smile. Cas’s face burned bright red.
“Boys, what’s our plan?” Cas asked, trying to get back to their task. “I don’t know when I’m gonna be called up, so we need to get going.”
“Calm down, Angel Boy,” Sam said. “I’ve been researching during the whole car ride.” (Castiel was an angel.) “It seems like there have been a chain of seemingly unrelated deaths.”
“So are they related?” Dean asked, his voice a little gruffer than usual. Cas’s knee had brushed his thigh, and Dean became a little uncomfortable. The place on his thigh burned from the small contact. Dean liked the touch, but Cas couldn’t know that.
“Of course they are,” Sam said sassily. He brushed his long hair back.
“Alright, Princess Sam, get to the point,” Dean joked. His voice had returned to normal, and he smiled cheekily after earning a hardy laugh from Cas. Their faces grew serious when they saw the look on Sam’s face.
“Guys, this is serious. Four people in this small town have hung themselves over the past five years,” Sam started.
“And...?” Dean asked cockily. Cas sighed, exasperated. Dean was so hardheaded and impatient. Cas loved that about him, of course, but he wished that Dean would let his brother finish a sentence. Dean had been doing that a lot lately.
“And all of them left letters.” He glared at Dean, challenging him to interrupt. “All of the letters said almost the same thing. This isn’t our usual, but what I’ve found, the victims talked about having sex with their husband, wife, boyfriend, etc. right before they hung themselves. The weird thing is, the police disregarded these letters because the wife of the latest victim said that she had been on a business trip when her husband died.”
“Okay... Now this is getting to be more of our kind of stuff,” Dean consented with a nod before taking a swig of his drink. He caught Cas watching him out of the corner of his eye. He was flattered and struggled to keep his cool.
“I think we oughta go talk to her tomorrow. Her name is Marty Higgins. I’ve got an address right here,” Sam showed where he had written it down in their father’s journal. “Let’s go get a hotel.”
***************
Dean sat up in an arm chair while the other two slept. Now that Cas was traveling with them, Dean usually slept with Sam, but lately Sam had started to have nightmares. Dean thought all of the psychic stuff was over, so he stayed up to make sure Sam was okay.
Sam thought that Dean didn’t know many basic facts because Dean didn’t really go to school, and certainly didn’t pay attention when he was there, but Dean knew a few things. Like sleep patterns. His father had taught him that. Dean knew that Sam had his nightmares during his deep sleep, so Dean would stay up until Sam wasn’t in deep sleep anymore. It had made Dean weary, but had also given him time to think over things. For example, that secret he and Cas were keeping from Sam.
(Flashback)
Sam was taking forever trying to interview the dead girl’s friend, so Cas and Dean were stuck at the hotel. They didn’t know where the guy’s house was, but they figured Sam would come back here to find them.
The two were sitting around talking, and Dean stood up to walk over to the window when it happened. He tripped over someone’s duffle bag in the middle of the floor, and landed face down on Cas’s bed... With Cas underneath him. Their lips had touched briefly before Dean immediately stood up.
“I... uh... I’m gonna go take a walk...” Dean said awkwardly, clearing his voice.
“I... Well I guess I’ll just stay here...” Cas replied. He watched Dean leave the hotel room and made sure he was well away before screaming like a teenage girl. Dean heard it, though, because he came rushing back.
“Is everything alright?!” he exclaimed, walking back in, and shutting the door. Cas cleared his face of any emotion.
“Yeah, everything’s fine.” Dean cocked an eyebrow, and Cas laughed.
“We can’t tell Sammy about this, okay? He’s already suspected me of being gay,” Dean said in his beautifully deep voice. Cas nodded. He wasn’t quite sure what to think of the situation. Dean sat down, and it was clear that he wasn’t gonna take that walk after all.
(End Flashback)
Dean had questioned his sexuality more than his brother had ever since then. Maybe he was bi. That seemed reasonable. Or maybe it was just Castiel. No, there were a few others in his life, but he had thought it normal. Nothing in his life was normal, so he didn’t know why anything would be even remotely normal for him. Hell, Castiel was his guardian angel!
Dean heard a grunt during his thinking and looked up, thinking it was Sam, but to his pleasant surprise it was Cas. Dean thought Cas’s weird, occasional snore/grunts were pretty cute. Dean admired Cas. He loved Cas’s slightly pointed nose, and his strong jaw. He loved the stubble on his chin that never seemed to fade or grow. He loved how peaceful Castiel looked while he was sleeping, almost child-like. Dean loved Cas’s dark, tousled hair. And he especially loved the bright blue eyes hidden behind Cas’s eyelids. Dean could stare into them all day. They were the purest blue, the colour of the ocean. They sparkled like the ocean, too. They were so jovial, and at the same time, so full of sadness. His face seemed young, but his eyes betrayed his age. They were old, filled with a sadness unknown to Dean’s generation. A sadness he could only have collected through decades of watching man fall.
Castiel knew that Dean stayed up every night, because he used to. Dean had wondered what Castiel did at night, if he slept in a chair, or if he left and came back. Dean had found out that Castiel used to stay up. Cas would watch over them. But after much convincing, Dean was able to get Cas to sleep. Dean liked when Cas slept, because his eyes glowed brighter and his face looked younger.
Around four in the morning, Sam started to fidget a bit in his sleep, and Dean took that as his cue to sleep. As he started to settle in his chair, Cas opened his eyes sleepily.
“Dean...” he muttered, voice heavy with sleep.
“Yes, Cas?” asked Dean with a small smile creeping on his face.
“Come here...” Cas scooted toward one side of his bed and patted the pace next to him. “Don’t bother Sammy.”
“Okay,” Dean obliged. He rose from the armchair and quietly walked over. He lay down, trying not to seem to encouraged by this invitation. His eyelids drooped as soon as his head hit the pillow, and he felt a warmth as Cas curled up next to him.
***************
“Wake up! Come on, boyfriends! We have a widow to interview!” Sam shouted. Dean groaned, and slowly but surely opened his eyes. He wasn’t to happy about the way he had been woken, and frankly, he wasn’t even sure was Sam was talking about. He sat up a bit, and Cas groaned in protest. Dean noticed that not only did Cas have his arms around Dean’s waist, but Dean had his arm wrapped around Cas’s shoulders. Dean bolted out of bed, and Cas fell off trying to hold onto him.
“What was that for?!” Cas exclaimed, picking himself off the floor.
“We were cuddling!” Dean responded.
“So?! That doesn’t mean you have jump out of bed!”
“Boys, you can have your relationship quarrels later!” Sam joked. His smile dropped when he saw the stern glares of Cas and Dean. “Okay. Fine, I’ll stop. We need to go interview Marty Higgins today, though, so get going.” Dean grudgingly obliged. Castiel grabbed a fresh shirt and started to dress. Dean chanced a glance at Cas, and immediately turned away, blushing, as he too changed shirts.
***************
“Well that did nothing for us...” Dean said as the three of them walked back into Jamie’s bar that night.
“Oh come on, Dean. At least we know it wasn’t her,” Sam reassured.
“We already knew that she wasn’t involved,” Cas pointed out.
“While you two argue, I’m gonna get a drink,” Dean sighed. He swaggered over to the bar. He decided he’d flirt with that bartender and find out her name. “Hello, again, beautiful,” he greeted.
“Oh, not you again...” Jamie groaned. “Let me guess, you want a beer?”
“You got it.” Dean winked. “What’s your name?”
“Jamie,” she answered. Her annoyance was obvious. “And you’re Dean, right?”
“Yeah. So how long have you been working here?” Dean asked.
“Why does it matter?” Jamie asked, slightly perturbed by Dean’s advances.
“What do you mean by that?”
“Well, you’re gay, aren’t you?” Jamie cocked her head, curious. Her expression was genuine.
“What! No! No, no... I don’t know...” Dean took a swig of his drink and drooped his head. “Why did you think that?”
“It just seemed to me that you were interested in that guy with the trench coat.”
“Oh... I guess I was a little more obvious than I thought.”
“So you are gay.”
“I think it’s just him.” Dean looked up, and Jamie smiled at him sweetly before taking his hand.
“You know, I was afraid you were just gonna stir up trouble, but you seem to be more interested in him than whatever you’re in town for.” Dean chuckled.
Cas had been watching this whole exchange past Sam’s shoulder. Sam was talking, but he was easily tuned out. Cas was ready to laugh when Jamie dismissed Dean again, but he quickly became angry with the conversation taking place. When Jamie took Dean’s hand, Cas couldn’t take it. He didn’t care if Dean didn’t return the feelings; he had to let Dean know.
Cas sprung up from his seat and sauntered to the bar.
“Dean!” he shouted. Dean’s head whipped around, and Jamie’s face lit up with a smile. Dean smiled at him, and his expression quickly changed to one of confusion as Cas approached determinedly.
“Cas, what’s up?” Dean asked. Cas didn’t answer; instead, he closed the distance between himself and Dean.
Time seemed to slow down. Cas’s breathing quickened, and Dean’s heart fluttered as he realised Castiel’s intentions. Dean saw Sam turn around to see what the commotion was all about out of the corner of his eye. Suddenly, Dean felt Cas’s breath on his face as Cas pressed his lips against Dean’s tentatively. Dean wasn’t having it, though. He’d wanted this for so long that he wanted more. He put his hand on the back of Cas’s neck and pulled him in closer. He turned on his barstool and Cas moved to stand between his legs. Their lips moved in sync; they had both been craving this. They broke apart for air, and Cas blushed. Dean chuckled at Cas’s embarrassment. They heard a slow clapping from behind them.
“Finally!” Sam shouted. “You two were sickening. All I’d see is longing looks but neither would say anything.” Dean growled at his brother’s comment.
“Let’s go,” Cas urged, taking Dean’s hand. Dean happily hopped down from the stool. He waved good-bye to Jamie and mouthed thank you. She waved back and started to happily chat with Sam. As they walked out the door, Dean heard Cas muttering.
“What?” Dean asked.
“Are you... Are you gay?” Cas asked timidly. Dean started to laugh.
“I don’t know,” answered Dean. Cas gave him a confused look. “I don’t think I’m gay. But for you? Definitely.” Cas smiled cheekily, and the two of them walked back to the hotel, happy to have the other’s company.